by Aliyah Burke
“You know you don’t have to leave right now. I know it’s early.”
He strolled toward her and wiped his hands off on a towel. “I can go home.”
She shrugged. “Up to you. There’s a yard here for Duke to play out in if you want to stay.” From her pocket she withdrew a key and slid it toward him on the counter. “There’s a house key if you want to take me up on it.”
“How are your plans for the day? It’s kind of early for the library, isn’t it?”
“We have a meeting.”
“And in the afternoon?”
She had a list of things she needed to see to. “What’d you have in mind?”
“Thought we could make up for missing our date yesterday.”
“I would love to but I have plans for the evening.” The light in his eyes dimmed but he smiled and nodded.
“Okay, just thought I would check.”
“I have to get going.” Kassidy pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Have a good day.” Purse in hand and Libby at her side, she hastened to the door. A slight bit of fancy footwork and she had Libby outside while keeping Duke in. “Oh, Justice?”
“Yeah, beautiful?”
“If you need a place for Duke, he can stay here.”
She blew him a kiss and darted to her car, already close to being late for the meeting. The timing was close for her but she made it with three minutes to spare. With a smile for the room, she sank into her chair and put her pad and pencil out before her.
Most of her morning passed with her in one meeting or another. There was one reading class that she had then it was back to another meeting. Libby in tow, she left the library and headed to the museum, where she dropped some more things off for her mother, got brought up to date on her from Lucy, and then headed out to take care of her own errands. The clock read after five when she finally finished unloading all her groceries, dog food, and dry cleaning from her car and put everything away.
Taped to the door of her refrigerator was a note. Peeling it off she opened it and read the handwritten words.
Kassidy;
Thank you so much for everything. If I need to take you up on the Duke issue, I’ll call before I bring him by.
Hope you have a wonderful day.
Talk to you soon.
~J
Not too much later, she and Libby were back in her car heading to her parents for dinner. They’d invited her over Sunday but since she’d originally had plans to be with Justice, they’d made it for tonight instead. She pulled into the drive and found her smile in place. Libby bounced beside her as they made their way to the front door and walked in. The powerful aromas of her mom’s cooking made everything suddenly seem all right in the world.
* * * *
Justice shut the door to his Vette and headed to the front door. He stole a glance over his shoulder to where Duke sat in the front seat, watching him. He licked his lips and wiped his palms down the thighs of his jeans. It had been a long time since he’d been so nervous.
Lifting his hand he pressed the doorbell and waited. Carly O’Neil answered the door, her eyes much more kind than they’d been last night, although there did seem to be a bit of strain in her expression.
“Good morning, Lieutenant.”
“Justice, please. Good morning to you, Ms. O’Neil.”
“I have a feeling we’re going to be seeing a lot of you, so we may as well be calling me Carly if I’m going to be calling you Justice.”
He felt better immediately. From the interior he could hear the crying wails of a child. And he knew. “Torrie?”
“Yes. Come on in.” They entered a large living room. “Please keep in mind she’s been through a terrifying ordeal and may want—”
“Jus-is!”
The cry pierced through the room, drowning out everything else. He jerked his gaze to the right and saw Torrie running to him as fast as she could. A blanket clutched in one hand, her eyes red and puffy, clear evidence she’d been crying. A lot.
He dropped to one knee and gathered her close, his eyes drifting shut when her slender arms gripped his neck with a strength he never realized she had.
“Hi, Torrie.” The small body in his arms shook and he placed a hand on her back saying, “I have someone with me who I know is looking forward to seeing you.”
“Duke?” The question came out in a whisper.
“Yes. He’s right outside in my car.” With a questioning look to Carly, merely out of courtesy for he knew he’d be taking her out there anyway, he continued, “We can go see him right now.”
“Now,” she affirmed, tucking her head under his chin and settling against him with a sigh.
The second they stepped out on the porch, Duke began barking and whining in the car.
“Don’t let him hurt her,” Carly said from behind him.
Without bothering to respond, he put down a squirming Torrie and hurried to the door to open it. Duke bounded out and immediately Torrie threw her arms around him and began chatting with him in a language only they understood.
He kept an eye on the small girl in the front yard. Carly stepped up beside him but he never took his gaze from Torrie. “What do I have to do to put my name in the running to adopt her if there is no family who comes for her?”
Carly sighed heavily and he looked down at her. “Justice, are you sure this is something you want to do?”
Words Kassidy asked him. “Is there something about me that makes you think I don’t have what it takes to be a father to Torrie?”
She shoved a hand through her red hair. “That’s not it. It’s not an easy process and it’s hard on her as well.”
“What could be harder on a kid than being thrown in foster care?”
“Look, why don’t you take some time to think about. A lot. You’re a single man with a career in the Coast Guard. Are you sure you want to tie yourself down with a child? What happens when a woman shows up in your life and doesn’t want a kid not her own? Did you ever think what that would do to Torrie, especially if she had the impression she would be your daughter?” Carly met his stare. “You asked me what can be harder, well, Justice, that can be harder on a kid than being put into foster care. I know you don’t like how I handled things last night, nor possibly my approach to the dog issue, but I’ve been doing this since I graduated college. My first responsibility is to the child, not to your ego.”
Her green eyes shot fire with her determined statements and his respect for her grew. Nodding, he sat down on the step and braced his forearms on his quads. Silence remained between them for a few moments and she sank down beside him, lacing her fingers.
“You know, she was hiding beneath the steering wheel when we got to the boat.” Carly gasped but remained silent. “Her mom, already dead, lay in a pool of her own blood and Duke sat before her, protecting her. When I got her out of there her big eyes stared at me, and the amount of pain and fear in them killed me. Torrie thought her mom was sleeping. She held on to me like I was a lifeline, her lifeline. She trusted me. I don’t ever want her to lose that.”
He rolled his shoulders and smiled at Torrie when she looked at him. “So yes, I am a single man. I have a career, but I want that little girl in my life. No amount of time will change my mind on that fact. I just need to know what steps I have to take.”
“All right, Lieutenant Justice Graham, all right. I’ll get you the information you need, but you have to know we have to search for and reach out to her family. So, keep in mind there may not be an option for you to do this.”
Those words churned in his gut. “I know. But if there isn’t anyone else for her, she needs to know that I want her. Even if there is, then she’ll know I will always be there for her.”
“She has to stay here, but I’m sure she’ll love a visit from you.” Carly shifted. “You know being in your job… it may not be the best.”
“I know. I’ve been serving my country since I was eighteen, I’d hoped to retire from it, but if it’s needed I can resig
n my commission early.”
“And a wife?”
“Seems to me getting married just to be allowed Torrie in my life is foolish judgment. It wouldn’t create for a happy home life.” Even as he spoke those words, he thought of Kassidy and knew that would work. Kassidy as his wife could never be wrong.
“You have someone in mind though. I could see it in your face.”
He shrugged negligently and refused to comment. His personal life was that, his.
“How do you think she’ll feel about you doing this?”
“She knows. I told her everything last night.”
Carly got to her feet. “I have other children to see to inside, are you staying for a while?”
“Yeah, I think I will.”
“Okay.”
Carly smiled when some older children came out front and ran for Duke. The dog never changed his happy attitude but Justice could see him always keeping an eye on his little charge, Torrie.
He spent the entire day with Torrie and the rest of the kids at the foster home. After dinner and her bath, he carried her to the crib she had been designated to sleep in and lowered her into it.
“No, Jus-is,” she said reaching for him. “Stay with you.”
“Sorry, baby, you have to stay here. I’ll be back to see you tomorrow.”
Big tears welled up and poured down her cheeks. Her bottom lip poked out and she sniffed heavily. “I want Duke and Jus-is.”
“We’ll be back tomorrow.” He lowered his head to hers and said, “I need you to be brave until I come back, okay?” Handing the blanket to her, he stroked his knuckles down the side of her face where he struggled to stay strong and maintain his resolve. “You go to sleep and I’ll be here tomorrow.”
She stared at his face and the tears continued to stream down her brown skin. Yet she nodded. “Morrow,” she whispered as if trying to convince herself of that.
“Yes, tomorrow.”
Torrie lay down and slipped her thumb in her mouth. He covered her with a blanket and brushed a kiss along her cheek. One of the hardest things he had ever done in his life was walking away and leaving her in that building.
In his car, Duke lay in the backseat, his head down, moping. “I know, big guy. We’ll see her tomorrow.”
With a mind of its own, his car headed toward Kassidy’s. When he pulled into the yard and shut off the car, her front door opened and she stepped out onto the porch. She waited for him, leaning up against the large post.
“Hi,” he said as she knelt down to pet Duke.
“Hi. I figured you might be back by. There’s food inside for him if he’s not eaten yet.” Kassidy opened the door and they walked in together. “How is she doing?”
“I didn’t want to leave her there.”
Without another word, Kassidy wrapped her arms around him and offered all the comfort she could. He had no words to express how her actions made him feel or what they meant to him.
Chapter Thirteen
Kassidy dropped to her knees and covered her mouth with her hands. It can’t be. This has to be a lie.
It had been a few idyllic months. Justice was still on track to get Torrie into his life, as no other relatives could be found. Her mother’s murder was still an open case, but he didn’t care. Justice was determined to have her in his life. There had been a few tense days when his sister had called saying she was being deployed into a warzone. But otherwise things had been going so well. Duke had settled in fine, and he and Libby got along swimmingly.
And now this. Another wave of nausea hit her with the force of a typhoon. The beeping of the phone alerted her to the fact the phone was still off the hook. With blind movements she put it back on the base and pushed unsteadily to her feet. She grabbed her purse and coat before leaving her office. It was hard to function.
“Kassidy, I need you to” Her boss Diane stopped talking and grabbed her arm. “Are you okay, honey?”
“I have to go to the hospital. There’s been an accident.”
“Okay. Go. Let me know if you need anything.”
She nodded and stumbled out the back to her car. Her movements were automatic as she started her car and drove to Quiet Harbor Memorial. Hands shaking she locked her vehicle and continued on into the heated interior. The loud noises and hustle and bustle all seemed to be in slow motion for her, the sounds muted.
At the desk she waited to be noticed. An older gentleman finally stood before her.
“Can I help you?” he asked.
“Philyra Barrow was brought in. She’s my mother.”
His nearly bald head dipped and his fingers danced across a keyboard. When he met her gaze again she could easily read the empathy in his expression. “I’ll take you.” He hollered over his shoulder as he was stepping out and then was beside her. “This way.”
They walked down a hallway past some curtained areas to a door with the shades drawn. “In here,” he said.
She stuck her hand out and pushed down the silver handle and swung the door in. The first thing she noticed was there was no sound in the room. The next, her father lay there with his head on the bed, holding her mom’s hand.
“Daddy?” she questioned in a voice tinged with disbelief at what she looked at.
Ethan Barrow lifted his head, appearing so much older than she recalled him being. Tear streaks down his face, eyes red and swollen.
“She’s gone, Kassidy.” His hand gripped the lifeless one and kissed the back of it. “Your mama’s gone.”
Tears welled up, and she shook her head. “No. No, daddy. No!”
With a lurch she propelled herself to the other side of the narrow bed. Her mother lay like she was sleeping, peaceful and relaxed. Lower lip sucked into her mouth, Kassidy reached out and touched her face, the flesh starting to cool.
“Mama?”
There was no stopping the flood of moisture that streamed down her face. She wanted it to be a lie. A trick. Anything but what it was.
“What… why… how?”
“Let’s go home, Kassidy, I’ll tell you everything there.”
Her gaze jerked up to his. Leave her here? Was he insane?
“I’m not leaving her.” She could smell the faint scent of her mom’s perfume. A soft mixture of peppermint and chocolate.
“They need to move her.”
“No.” Kassidy held her mother tighter and prayed the nightmare would end.
The feel of her father’s hand on her shoulder made her flinch and she yanked away from him, trying to press closer to her mother.
“Kassidy Lyra.” The tone was deep but full of love. One she recalled from childhood when her dad wanted her to stop arguing and come with him.
Kissing her mom on the cheek, she slowly released her grip and stepped away. Ethan draped an arm around her and led her toward the door. She hesitated before exiting and cast a final glance over her shoulder. It wasn’t a dream, it may very well still be a nightmare, but either way, her mom remained lying there, motionless. Lifeless.
Her dad drove her car back to her house and they were silent as they walked in through the front door. She was silent when she let the dogs out. In the living room, she sat down beside her father and took one of his hands in hers.
“Daddy,” she whimpered. “Tell me what happened.”
He kissed the back of her hand and Kassidy curled up and rested her head in his lap as she’d done so many times during childhood when she’d been in pain. There seemed to be an infinite amount of that coursing through her right now. His fingertips caressed her temple in soothing swipes and she waited, desperate to know but understanding this wasn’t easy for him either.
“Your mother had Lupus.”
Lupus. Kassidy racked her brain for knowledge on it and came up short for the most part. She sat up and wiped her eyes.
“I didn’t think that could kill you.” She swallowed the bile rising fast and swift up through her esophagus. “Why didn’t y’all tell me?”
“Normally Lupus d
oesn’t kill but your mother,” his face scrunched up in pain, “Philyra had an extremely severe case.”
“A severe case.”
“She headed in today and went into cardiac arrest. They couldn’t save her.”
“Headed in. That’s what the note was from the doctor about the results not being as promising as hoped and the need to run some more tests?” she asked the question even though she knew it was so.
A void. It felt like she was in a void. His mouth moved and words came out but none of them made any sense to her. A dark room called to her and she longed to crawl into the inky blackness and let oblivion take over.
The sound of a deep gut-wrenching sob pulled her away from the door and brought her back to focus on her father. He sat hunched over, arms around his middle, and cried like a baby. She wanted to rail and cry herself but she knew he needed her more. So no matter how much she hurt, he lost the love of his life. The woman he’d spent almost all of their life together, for they had grown up on the same street.
“Come on, daddy,” she said in a consolatory tone, sliding one arm around him in encouragement. “Let’s get you to a bed.”
“I have to make arrangements and…”
“We’ll do it together, Daddy. You go get some rest and I’ll make you something to eat.”
It took a bit of coaxing before he went back to her spare bedroom. She removed his shoes and tucked him in. With a kiss to his weathered cheek, she left him there.
Kassidy made herself a cup of tea and let the dogs back in. Then she moved to the piano and sat at it, the mug of steaming liquid clasped between her hands. Her gaze skimmed over all the photos and it felt like she was being torn apart from the inside out. Grabbing a headshot of her mom, she shuffled to the couch and curled up with the photo and the tea, tears flowing unchecked.
When she drained the last dregs of her tea, she got up and set the picture back in its proper spot. Then she headed to the phone and began to make some calls. She paused to fix a casserole then got back to making necessary calls.
