by E. L. Todd
“Yeah...” While I loved Ryker when we were together, I realized that relationship didn’t accomplish anything but heartbreak. We didn’t move beyond the physical aspects of our relationship, and he never really shared his life with me. Overall, it was just a waste of time. I could have been with Zeke, with a man who wanted me for more than just good sex. “I can’t believe I never realized how you felt about me. Honestly, I didn’t have a clue.”
“Well, I did a good job of hiding it.”
“I guess. But I also consider myself to be an observant person.”
“You are. But when someone wants to hide something, they will.” He moved his hand across my slender stomach.
“When did your feelings start?” Now that Zeke and I were together, I could ask him these things. For the past two weeks, we’d been fucking like crazy and doing very little talking. Once we were both satisfied, we finally did something other than screw.
“I can’t remember. One day, they were just there. And they never really went away. I debated making a move, but I suspected you didn’t notice me the way I noticed you. I didn’t want to risk our friendship and put Rex in a difficult situation. But eventually, I got tired of doing nothing. By the time I manned up to do something about it, Ryker got in the way.”
“He tends to do that...”
“And when did your feelings for me start? When Rochelle told you?”
“No. It was before then.”
“Yeah?” He raised an eyebrow in surprise.
“I started having dreams about you...dirty dreams.”
He grinned. “I like where this is going.”
“And then I started thinking about you differently when I wasn’t dreaming...and those feelings just got out of control. I felt so guilty since you were seeing Rochelle that I stayed in a hotel room just to have some space.”
“Rex told me about that.”
“It didn’t accomplish anything. Just made me eat out a lot more and gain some weight.”
His hand rubbed my stomach gently. “I didn’t even notice.”
“Smart answer.”
He leaned down and kissed me on the belly button, like how a man would kiss his pregnant wife. He even made that sexy, his warm and soft lips smooth against my sensitive skin.
“I wanted to make a move sooner, but I promised myself I would wait thirty days after you broke up with Rochelle so I wouldn’t seem insensitive...and slutty.”
He chuckled. “Well, you broke your promise.”
“No, I didn’t. You were the one who kissed me in front of the bathroom. That was a hot kiss, by the way.”
“Thanks,” he said with his handsome smile. “But I’m not talking about that. Remember the night you asked me to pick you up from the bars?”
“Yes...” I was so drunk that I couldn’t recall anything that happened that night. The last thing I remembered was Zeke picking me up in his Jeep and taking me to his place. I woke up on the couch with a blanket pulled over my body.
“You made a move then.”
I sat up because I was immediately mortified. “I did?”
He nodded. “You kissed me. And that was a hot kiss, by the way.”
I was too embarrassed to pick up on his joke. “I did...?”
“You said a few other things... Like, you wanted me and wished you could have me.”
I covered my face with both palms, unable to believe how desperate I was. I told myself never to behave that way, but all my rules went out the window when it came to Zeke. “Oh, god...”
He grabbed both of my wrists and pulled my hands away from my face. “For what it’s worth, I didn’t want to stop kissing you. I wanted to take you into my bedroom and make you mine.”
“Then why didn’t you?”
He sighed. “You know why, Rae.”
Taking advantage of a drunk woman wasn’t Zeke’s style. And he probably didn’t want our first time to be on a night when I wouldn’t remember anything the following day. “I’m sorry I acted like that. I’ve never done that before.”
“Don’t apologize. It was so hard to resist you. You’ll never understand.”
“I act like such a slut when I’m with you...”
He smiled. “There are worse things.” He hooked his arm around my waist and kissed me on the forehead. “The sluttier, the better. That’s my philosophy.”
“I don’t think I can get any sluttier.”
“Then you’re doing a good job.”
I chuckled then buried my face in his chest, inhaling his scent and enjoying it. His arms enveloped me, warm and strong.
On the nightstand, my phone beeped with a text message.
I ignored it because I didn’t care at the moment. I was in the most comfortable position of my life.
It beeped again.
“Maybe you should check that,” Zeke said.
I squeezed him harder. “Never.”
He chuckled and kissed me on the temple.
His phone vibrated on his nightstand with a text message.
He sighed against me. “I bet a zillion dollars that’s Rex trying to get a hold of you.”
“Ugh. He needs a hobby.” I’d been cooped up with Zeke for the past few weeks. During that time, I’d barely spoken to Rex or seen him. I hadn’t talked to Kayden or Jessie either. I disappeared from the map so I could have all kinds of good sex with Zeke—my new boyfriend.
Zeke grabbed the phone.
“No.” I grabbed his arm and steadied it before he could read the screen. “No good will come of this.”
“Baby, he’s my best friend. I can’t ignore him forever.”
“I don’t want our sexcapades to end.”
“Me neither. But we have to face reality.” He pulled the phone to his face and read the message. “Rex wants to go out tonight.”
“Tell him to find new friends to hang out with.”
He smirked because he knew I was kidding. “Now it’s your turn.”
I growled before I rolled to the other side of the bed and grabbed my phone. Surprisingly, Rex hadn’t texted me. It was Jessie. We’ve let you guys cuddle and screw long enough. It’s time to come out and play. She sent another message directly afterward. Don’t be one of those bitches who dumps her friends the second a nice package comes into her life.
A text message from Rex popped on the screen. Release my friend. You’re being a terrorist right now.
Kayden texted me instantly. You better come out tonight. Otherwise, we’ll kidnap you.
Jessie texted me again. You coming or what?
I turned back to Zeke. “Damn, they’re really blowing up my phone.”
Zeke stared at his screen. “Rex is doing the same to me. Looks like we’re going out tonight.”
“They’re such shitheads.”
“We’ll still go home together.” He leaned over and kissed me on the shoulder. “We’ll have great sex. And we’ll wake up together in the morning.”
Chapter Two
Rae
Zeke and I walked inside with his arm around my waist. I wore a short gray dress with black heels, and he looked delicious in dark jeans, a t-shirt, and a black jacket. Even when he was covered head to toe, his physical fitness was obvious. He had thick arms, a tight stomach with washboard abs, and a nice ass that fit into his jeans snugly.
We located everyone at our usual booth in the corner. Rex sat beside Kayden, his beer sitting on a coaster. Jessie sat across from them, looking perfect like the beauty queen that she was.
Zeke pressed his lips to my ear. “You look really hot in that dress.” He pulled me closer into his side and kissed my ear.
“Thanks.” That shiver I always felt when I was around him had returned in full force. The butterflies were enormous as they flew inside my belly. Now I wanted to spend the evening with my friends even less.
“I’m going to fuck you in the Jeep on the way home.”
This was a side to Zeke I never anticipated, and I really liked it. I dubbed him a boy-next-
door gentleman who cared more about being polite than being forward. But now that Zeke and I were together, he showed his true colors. He was a sex machine, and his batteries never died. “Please do.”
We reached the table, and Rex gripped his chest and pretended to nearly faint. “Oh my god...it’s really you. I thought you were just a myth.”
I grabbed a coaster from the table and tossed it at his face. “Shut up.”
“I’m with him on this one,” Jessie said. “We haven’t spoken in two weeks.”
Now she was really making me feel guilty. “I know...” I slid into the booth beside Jessie. “We lost track of time.”
Zeke glanced at the bar then turned back to me. “Baby, what do you want? A lemon drop?”
I liked the fact that he remembered my favorite drink. “Sure.”
“Anyone else need anything?” Zeke asked.
“We’re good,” Kayden said. “But thanks.”
Zeke turned around and walked away, his ass looking perfect in those snug jeans.
I could stare at it all day, but I knew I needed to pay attention to the friends I’d neglected lately.
“He’s gone, so spill it,” Jessie blurted. “I’m guessing the sex is good since we haven’t seen you in so long.”
“Excuse me...” Rex slid out of the booth. “I need to throw up on someone.”
When Rex was out of earshot, I answered. “It’s unbelievable.” My stomach tightened just thinking about it. I wondered how he would fuck me in the car on the way home. “Think of the best sex you’ve ever had...”
“Okay,” Jessie said.
“Now times it by ten,” I finished.
Kayden turned her head and stared at Zeke standing at the bar. “Go, Zeke.”
“He has a big dick, huh?” Jessie pressed.
I rolled my eyes. “Jess.”
“Oh, come on,” Jessie said. “You told us how big Ryker’s was.”
“That’s different,” I argued. “You’re actually friends with Zeke.”
“And since he’s my friend, I need to know what I’m dealing with,” Jessie said. “Guys know exactly what we’re packing because it’s right in their line of sight.” She pointed at her chest. “So, I think it’s fair if you give us this inside information.”
Since they cornered me into a wall, I caved. “It’s impressive.”
“I knew it,” Jessie said. “Bigger than Ryker?”
“Okay, I’m not answering that,” I said. “I don’t compare.”
“We all compare,” Kayden said.
“But it’s been four months since I’ve been with Ryker, so I don’t exactly remember,” I said. “They’re about the same, I would say.”
“You’re so lucky,” Jessie said. “Two fine-ass guys in a row.”
I definitely wouldn’t call myself lucky. Ryker ripped out my heart and hurt me more than any other guy ever had. In fact, he hurt me more than every guy combined. I told him I loved him, and he decided to dump me in reciprocation. “What about you? Seeing anyone?”
“I hooked up with this pharmacist, but he was pretty boring.” Jessie sipped her cosmo, and her gold bracelets shifted up and down her arm as she moved. She wore a black dress with lots of jewelry, looking like a queen. “Now, I’m on the prowl again.”
“Someone good will come along,” I said. “Just leave your net in the water a little longer.” I turned to Kayden. “What about you?”
“Rex and I are good.” She glanced at the bar and stared at Rex as he talked to Zeke. The drinks were sitting on the counter, but they continued to talk where they couldn’t be overheard. “Taking things slow. Like, really slow. Like, annoyingly slow.”
“That doesn’t sound like Rex.” Ever since we started living together, Rex often brought strange women to the apartment. He was hit it then quit it on a weekly basis. I stopped bothering to ask for their names since I would never see them again.
“At all,” Jessie said. “He must really be trying.”
“I think so,” Kayden said. “But a girl needs some action too, you know.”
“Then make a move,” Jessie said. “Just take what you want.”
It was weird to talk about men with my friends when Rex was one of those men. But Kayden was my best friend, and I needed to be a good sport about it. If Rex could make an effort to be comfortable with Zeke and me dating, then I needed to make the same effort in return. “I would seduce him. Men can’t say no to a woman on her knees in lingerie.”
“Couldn’t have said it better myself,” Jessie said. “Problem solved.”
“Maybe I’ll give that a try,” Kayden said. “I can barely get a good make out session with him.”
“I think it’s sweet.” Rex had never put in any effort toward women. He just had his fun and moved on. But he was really trying to make Kayden happy, to cultivate a relationship that would outlast the sex. “He’s trying to be a boyfriend. I mean, he has absolutely no clue what he’s doing, but he’s trying.”
“True,” Jessie said. “You have to give him credit for that.”
“I know.” Kayden glanced at him again, a look of longing on her face. “I guess I’ll be more patient.”
Zeke and Rex returned to the booth, and Zeke slid in beside me and placed my lemon drop on the coaster. His arm moved over the back of the seat and around my shoulders naturally, like it wasn’t the first time he’d done it in front of our friends.
Everyone stared at us, surprised by the affection.
“I think I speak for everyone here when I say we don’t want to watch you guys make out all the time,” Rex said.
“Sorry, we are making out now?” I questioned. “Because if you think this is making out, I feel bad for Kayden.”
Jessie and Kayden both smirked. But Rex just looked annoyed. “Keep it PG. That’s all I’m saying.”
“Or you could just not look,” I argued.
“My eyelids will still be burned,” Rex said. “And then my brain will be next.”
“So you’ll be just as dumb as you are now.” After having a long break from my brother, we still bickered back and forth like we were still children.
“Zeke.” He glared at his best friend. “Control your woman.”
“His woman?” I snapped. “Control your stupidity, Rex. That’s the real problem here.”
Zeke smirked like this argument was entertaining. “Anyway...I’m thinking about taking a hike to Mt. Rainier. Anyone want to join?”
“How serious of a hike are we talking?” Jessie asked. “I don’t like to sweat.”
“It’s pretty easy,” Zeke said. “You don’t need hiking gear to do it.”
“Your face is the problem.” Rex’s poorly timed insult came across the table, and he grinned like he’d just said something particularly witty.
All I did was roll my eyes in response. He wasn’t worth my time.
Jessie gave Rex an irritated look. “Good one...”
Zeke refocused the conversation and kept it on track. “I say we go next Saturday. Really beautiful views up there.”
“I’d like to go,” I said. “Can we bring Safari?”
“Yeah,” Zeke answered. “It’ll be a breeze for him.”
“He’ll be doing laps around us,” Kayden said. “Those kinds of dogs are meant for the great outdoors.”
Like no time had passed at all, we fell into a normal conversation just the way we used to. After a few rounds and lots of laughs, I realized I did miss spending time with them. The past two weeks were heavenly, but I knew I couldn’t hide away from everyone like that again. From now on, we would have to make sure nothing changed with our group of friends—even if that meant there would be less sex.
***
I left the gang and walked to the bathroom in the rear of the bar. Now that it was past ten, the place was packed. Every table was full of friends out for a good time. I pushed through the crowd that formed outside the hallway and made my way inside. My heels slipped on the tile floor, and I looked down to ma
ke sure it didn’t scratch. That’s when I noticed the man standing in front of me, dangerously close and not making any attempt to move.
I looked up, prepared to pop my wrist into his nose if he did anything stupid.
But I realized it was Ryker.
Ryker was standing in front of me.
With a black t-shirt and dark jeans, he looked exactly the same as the last time I saw him. He wore his charming smile and bright eyes, but there was a distinct sadness underneath his exterior. I couldn’t quite pinpoint where it was. But I could definitely feel it wash over me. Even after all this time apart, I was still in tune with his emotions. “What a nice surprise.”
I caught my footing and regained my confidence. “I thought I scuffed my shoe. Had a small panic attack.”
“Didn’t realize you cared about shoes so much.”
“I don’t. But I borrowed them from Jessie.”
“Oh. Then you definitely need to be careful.”
“They look okay.” I noticed the thick line of hair around his jaw. It didn’t seem like he cared about shaving lately. But he still looked handsome with the new look. He could be bald with a thick beard and still catch the attention of every woman in the room. “I’ll live to see another day.”
He smiled at my joke then looked me up and down. “I like your dress.”
“Thanks.” I didn’t give him a compliment in return because that would just be weird. Just talking to him was weird. Our last conversation ended on a heavy note. He said something to me I didn’t quite understand, but I never asked for clarification. “How are you?”
“I’m okay. Been better.” He didn’t elaborate, but his eyes spoke of sadness. “You?”
I was in a really good place. In fact, I was happier than I’d been in a long time. But I felt insensitive saying that when he’d lost his father a few months ago. “I’m okay. Just working and taking Safari on those runs he loves.”
“That dog makes me feel lazy.”
“If it makes you feel any better, he makes me feel lazy too.” I crossed my arms over my chest and gave him a smile, but I felt my unease grow. Ryker and I were on better terms now that I was over him, but it still felt innately wrong to talk to him. He was my ex, and my current boyfriend was just in the other room. Ryker and I weren’t friends before we got together, so there was no reason for us to be friends now. I guess I pitied him because of his father’s death. I knew exactly how it felt to lose a parent—two, actually.
