"Fuck," he whispered. "Livie."
"Nope," I said. "I don't want to hear it now. I've gotten used to be alone. Just when my mind won't stop spinning, I find out even more. You had the time to call my mom to check on me. You found the time to write her checks and send money to help me. How responsible and caring of you. Again, it helped me. I appreciate that. Let me say the same thing I said before. I didn't need your money. I needed you. I can't let you get to me anymore than you already have since you've gotten here. I was so much better off thinking you never gave a shit. I never thought I would say this, but it was easier that way. What else don't I know, Zander? I've got the hugest feeling that there's more."
He just stood there looking at me. I didn't know if I wanted to cry and run away from him or cry and run to him. How messed up was that?
"You're leaving to go back home. I know that. I'm not delusional. Everything's going to go right back to the way it was. I'll still take care of your mom. I'll do it for the same reason I did before. You'll live your dream, and I'll be here living mine. No more doing things to help me. No more taking care of things without me knowing. No more sending my mom money. No more medical bills. I don't need your money. It means nothing to me. Give it to charity, or spend it on your lady friends. I don't care what you do with it, but I don't want a single penny. You know me. I can take care of myself. I don't need your pity or your charity."
When I moved to walk passed him, he reached out and grabbed my arm. That familiar warmth I missed so much ran through me, and I pulled away from him.
"Please don't touch me," I said. "I can't deal with getting any closer to you to have you walk back out again."
"Can you have April come down here?" he asked. "I brought the stuff to change her bandages."
I let out a long breath. He was making it even worse by being nice to my kids. I had no idea what his motive was there either.
"Stop being nice to my kids. They are going to get attached to you. It's going to hurt them when you leave. They don't have a man in their lives. It's not going to take much for them to care about you, Zander. I can't let them get hurt. You don't want kids. Don't make them think you do."
I walked to the stairs and called April to come down. She came bouncing down the stairs, and her face lit up the second she saw him. I know he saw it too. He looked over at me and I shook my head.
Chapter 19
Zander
Hearing her talk about Mike coming to the bakery pissed me off. When she said he had her backed up against the counter, I couldn't hear anymore. That guy was lucky. I had no idea why she was sticking up for him. Did she still have feelings for him, I wondered? She said it was because when I left she'd still have to deal with him. I didn't know what to think. He could have hurt her. I already wasn't there once when he did. What if he went after her again? She had no idea the kind of stuff I had seen over the years. He could hurt her really bad or worse. Just because she didn't think he would didn't mean he wouldn't. That shit needed taken care of. I was there, and I wasn't letting it go.
April sat down in the chair. I took her bandages off and cleaned her cut. It looked really good. I wanted her to be careful with it. If she played too hard, she could bust it back open. Someone needed to watch it for the day. I watched her face as I bandaged her back up. She trusted me. I had never even met her before that week. She was a great kid, and so was Jack.
I could feel Livie looking down at me from her spot next to the kitchen sink the entire time. When I was done, April was gone and off playing again. I stood up and walked over to where Livie was standing. She was being very strong. I knew her well. When I took her chin in my hand and lifted it to see her eyes, I could feel her body shaking.
"I don't want to go back to the way things were. I want to talk to you. I'm not going to send your mom money or pay for anything. I want to call you instead of her. I'm so sorry for everything. You're my best friend. You always have been. I want back what we had before."
I backed away from her, picked up the bag I brought with me, and walked out the door. She had to get back to work, and I wasn't about to make her cry before she went. It took all I had not to yell and go on about Mike, but I knew it wouldn't do any good. As soon as she was gone, I was in my car and on my way to his shop.
When I got out of my car, Mike's dad came out to greet me.
"Hey, Zander," he said. "It's nice to see your back. I don't want any trouble at the shop. You two need to take it someplace else. I know what he did today. He came in this morning talking about it. I also know you're the reason for his nose. He would never hurt her on purpose. I don't blame her for leaving him. She had every right. He wasn't good to her. He isn't good to the kids. He's so wrapped up in feeling sorry for himself. The police were already here. He promised not to go back to the bakery. They won't let him anywhere near it. I have to go get the stuff now. I'd like to give him a swift kick myself right now. You can have your words, but I can't have any fighting here."
I nodded to the older man. He really had aged while I was gone. A few moments later, Mike came out.
"What do you want?" he started. "Did you come here to defend your girl? You gave that up after high school. I was here when you weren't. I knew she came to see you. I thought you were going to have the balls to keep her there. I really did. When she came home, I was so happy. You didn't have it in you I guess. I married her as fast as I could. I loved her you know. I still do."
"You have a funny way of showing it," I said. "She told me about her arm."
"It was an accident. I wouldn't have hurt her on purpose."
"You had a broken bottle in your hand. How was that an accident?" I asked. "Do you think it was okay to hold her up against the wall?"
He stood there looking at me.
"Are you staying here, or are you going home?" he asked.
"I'm going home," I answered.
"Then I don't get why you're standing here right now. You're going back to your fancy life. She's still going to be here. Why bother stirring shit up before walking away. That's what you're good at. The walking away part, I mean. She was a mess when you left. I finally got her to go out with me. I thought she was over you when I got the ring. Then I found out she was going to New York. She left something in my car by accident. I never said a word to her about it. She came back and accepted my proposal. We had a kid together. I thought it was going to be okay. She didn't want to work like I wanted her too. She had to work in that damn bakery. She was still convinced she was going to own that damn place one day. I don't know why. It was never going to happen. I could never have afforded to buy the place. I didn't want another kid. When she got pregnant again, I was so mad. She was on the pill. It shouldn't have happened. Then she got mouthy with me and started fighting me about making dinner and shit like that. That was her job. She was supposed to take care of me. I should have come first. That night I came home and things got out of control. It was an accident. I didn't cut her on purpose."
"So if you would have hit a different vein and she would have bled to death, that would've been okay. It would have been an accident. I don't think so. You didn't even help her. You just left. What about your behavior at the funeral home? What about this morning?"
The guy was acting like it was all no big deal. I felt my body getting tighter and tighter. It was taking all I had not to go after him.
"I want her back?" he said.
"Why?" I asked. "You just said that she wasn't doing what she was supposed to. She owns the bakery now. You keep calling April and Jack kids like they aren't even yours. You said you didn't want a second kid. You've done nothing to take care of them or see them. Don't you think they deserve a father?"
"If I have to deal with the kids to have her, I will," he said.
"No," I growled. "You leave her alone. They don't need someone around just because. They deserve to have someone love them and care for them. Do you have any idea how smart they are? They are amazing, Mike. I can't believe you can stand here and
talk about them like they aren't real people. Those are your kids."
"If you like them so much, then you take care of them. Olivia belongs with me. I was the one that wanted to be with her. I was the one that didn't leave. You don't get to come back here after sixteen years and save the day."
"I don't get it," I said. "You say you want to get her back, but you have been nothing but shitty to her."
"I don't care if she takes me back or not. I care that you don't get her," he said. "She's not all that you know. She can't even take care of her man when she has one."
"Do not talk about her like that again. You need to shut your mouth. I came here to tell you to leave her alone. Do not touch her. If I find out you go anywhere near her, I will beat your ass worse than you have ever gotten it before."
"So you think you're some kind of big man now. You need to get over yourself. Just because you left here and became big stuff doesn't mean you can push people around. You need to mind your own fucking business before I kick your ass."
I stood still and closed my eyes to try and calm my nerves. That wasn't the smartest thing. Out of nowhere, he got me in the eye. I felt the blow before stumbling back a few feet. When I opened my eyes, I saw his dad watching me. He shook his head and turned around. I pulled my arm back and got him in the cheek. Before I knew it, we were on the ground. I was on top of him. In that moment, I was thankful for my gym. He got in one shot to my three. It didn't take long before his dad was back out with the phone in his hand and two guys from the shop trying to pull me off of Mike.
"Enough," he yelled. "You are both grown men. Get up off that ground before I call the cops. I'm sure it won't be good for your whole doctor thing. It won't be good for you either. They've already had to deal with you once today."
I pushed off of Mike and stood up. His dad was right. I didn't want to deal with his son any more than I had to. I stopped in front of my car and looked back to where Mike was sitting on the ground.
"Stay the fuck away from her. I don't care if I have to fly back here every weekend. Every single time you speak to her or go anywhere near her, I will be back here to talk to you. If I find out you touch her, I will crush your ass. This is your one and only warning."
He grumbled back at me. I got in my car and drove away before we both started again. We looked like two teenagers fighting over a girl. It made me so angry hearing him talk about his wife and kids that way. Who treats people like that? I thought about my dad and the way he always made me feel. There was no way I ever wanted Jack to feel that way about men in his life. April had Livie to look up to. Jack needed someone in his life as well.
I went home to change my shirt and look at my face. He had gotten another good one in after the first surprise. I iced my eye and put a bandage over the other side. It wasn't a huge cut, but I was hoping to keep it to a tiny scar or none at all. I had originally planned to be back at work within two days, but plans had changed. There was no way I was going back with a messed up eye. It was definitely going to be black. That fucker had to get me when I wasn't looking. He couldn't even be a man about it.
I thought about going by the bakery but decided against it. She was going to make a scene. I knew there was no avoiding it. Instead, I went to the store to buy stuff for dinner. Maybe I could calm her with some steaks on the grill, I thought. It was worth a shot. I would even bake a cake. It would taste nothing like hers, but it was the thought that counted. Right?
Chapter 20
Olivia
I was so happy to be home from work. It had been the longest day ever. Mike had totally freaked me out when he showed up that morning. I never thought he would hurt me intentionally, but I have to admit, I was scared at that moment. The look on his face was enough to get me. I had never been so happy to see headlights in my life. Then when I was home for lunch, Z heard me talking to my mom, and I blew up at him. I was hoping to get dinner made, spend time with the kids, and read before drifting off into a dreamless, calm sleep. I would be home. It was the one place I could lock the door and shut out the rest of the world. Everything would be great as soon as I got there.
When I pulled up in the driveway and got out to the car, the most amazing smell drifted passed my nose. I grabbed my purse, phone, and work bag and looked up to see Z standing over a grill with both of the kids next to him.
"Don't make dinner, I'm cooking," he yelled back over his shoulder.
"We even made a cake, mommy," Jack yelled toward me with a smile on his face.
"Please watch the kids by the grill," I yelled out without thinking about him being a doctor.
I knew he was watching them. It was me always warning others to be careful. I didn't want them to get hurt.
"We'll call you over when it's ready," he said. "Go soak in the tub. You have plenty of time."
I walked in and my mom looked over at me with a strange look on her face.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing," she said, as she shook her head and walked away.
What the hell was that about, I wondered? There was no reading that expression. Something was going on in her head, but I had no idea what it was.
I took off up the stairs, dropped my stuff on my bed, and went straight to the bathroom. Z was making dinner, and I was taking advantage of it. It had been a long time since I had been able to take a long bath while someone else worried about dinner. Usually, I walked in the door to both kids telling on each other, cooked up something for dinner, and spent a few minutes with them. Then I'd clean up, get them ready for bed, and be lucky if I even got a shower in before collapsing onto my bed. I ran the bath water, grabbed my e-reader, and let my body ease into the warm, relaxing water.
My head was back against the tub and my eyes were closed. I could hear the kids laughing and playing outside. It made me smile so wide. I could hear the things he was saying back to them. He was cracking me up. I opened my tablet and started reading as I soaked. It felt so good to feel the tension leave my body.
It felt like minutes passed when I heard the footsteps approach the door.
"Mommy," Jack's little voice said.
"Yes," I answered.
"Dinner's ready," he said.
"I'll be right out. You guys start without me," I said.
His little feet took off down the stairs. It made me realize how big the two of them were getting. I spent as much time with them as I could, but it was going by so fast. Quickly, I finished my bath, dried off, and threw on some comfortable clothes. Everyone that was outside had definitely seen me look much worse than I was at that moment. I brushed out my hair, threw on some flip-flops, and headed out the door.
The smell that hit my nose as soon as I opened the door had my mouth watering. I loved the smell of barbecue straight from the grill. They were all sitting at a picnic table in Z's backyard. It brought back memories of summers when we were in high school. His back was to me. There was a child on each side of him. He had no idea how much they liked him. It was impossible not to.
"Did the kids wash their hands?" I asked.
"Of course they did," he said. "Come on, I made you a plate already."
When I sat down and looked at my plate, I felt my stomach growl. I didn't realize that I hadn't eaten since breakfast. When I came home for lunch, I ended up being too upset to eat after arguing with him. There was chicken, steak, potatoes, and corn on my plate. He remembered exactly how I liked my corn. It made me laugh when I thought about how strange he thought I was that I sprinkled parmesan cheese on it. It did melt my heart a little to know that he remembered.
"Taste it, mom," April said. "We made it together."
Z was looking down at his plate. I felt so bad for the way I treated him earlier in the day and knew that I needed to make sure to apologize. Everything was hitting me, and I was having a hard time. It didn't give me the right to take it out on him. Both of our moms were enjoying their food, but neither of them had said a word. I lifted the corn to take a bite, and let out a tiny moan. It was so sweet
and perfect.
"Do you like it?" April asked. "Did we do a good job?"
"You sure did," I said. "It tastes so good."
The kids were going back and forth about what they had each done to help and about the funny things Zander had done. I couldn't help but smile and laugh right along with their happy little stories. I ate every bite of food on my plate. It was all so good.
"This was really nice," I said, as I looked at Z. "It was awesome being able to take a real bath and be fed such a great meal. Thank you."
He looked up from his plate, and I let out a gasp mixed with a yelp. My hand went to my mouth in shock.
"What happened to you?" I asked concerned.
He looked so rough. His eye was dark and swollen and there was a cut on the other side of his face. Oh shit, I thought! I tilted my head back, closed my eyes, and shook my head, as I let out a long breath.
"What did you do?" I asked.
"Nothing," he said. "It's fine."
"Zander," I said with a tremble in my voice.
"It was just a little accident. Everything is fine."
April ran into his house and got the cake. She cut it, and he helped her serve a piece to everyone. I bit into it with a smile pasted on my face, even though I was ready to explode. The cake was dry, out of a box, with canned frosting, but it was the sweetest thing anyone had ever done for me. I made sure to go on and on to the kids about how good it was. They both ran over to hug me and tell me how much they loved me. I told them how happy I was that they made me such an amazing dinner. They were both so proud of themselves.
A Blast from the Past (A Second Chance Romance) Page 11
