by Cindy Stark
"Down the hall, last door on the right."
She refused to look at Jase again. He'd taken his shirt off in front of her on purpose. She was sure of it. He knew exactly what kind of effect it would have on her, and she was positive he was trying to throw her off her game. Wasn't going to happen.
Rich golds and greens decorated the bedroom, with a huge mahogany bed sitting squat in the middle. On the dresser sat a photo of four people. A family. She stopped and then softly padded toward the dresser. A younger Jase stood with his parents and little sister in front of a group of pines. She lifted the frame. Looked like somewhere in Oregon to her. Even at that age, Jase was taller than his father. Jase and his sister both had their mother's eyes and dark hair. His sister was beautiful, innocent. They all looked so happy, with no idea what lay ahead.
Her heart broke open. These were the people Jase loved. The family he would never see again. No wonder he'd turned vigilante. She traced a finger over Jase's image, tears crowding to the corners of her eyes. The picture explained more about him than anything ever could.
She could never compete against that kind of revenge.
Allie set the frame back where she'd found it, knowing this was a side of him he'd want to keep private.
She started unbuttoning her shirt as she moved into the bathroom. It was just as beautiful as the rest of his house. Stone tiles in varying shades of brown covered the floor. Dazzling lights illuminated two vanities, each with its own marble sink.
She peeled the wet fabric from her shoulders as her gaze fell on an exquisite jetted-tub that looked like absolute heaven at the moment. She folded her soiled shirt and laid it on the counter. Then, she unhooked her bra and reached for a towel. The rain had soaked her and chilled her to the bone. Bits of gritty dirt covered her arms and legs. She tried rubbing off the grime, but she still felt dirty.
She glanced in the mirror and cringed. A piece of wet leaf clung to the side of her rain-plastered hair, and her mascara sat in a puddle under her eyes. Lovely. Just lovely.
The tub beckoned to her again. It would be pointless to put on fresh clothes the way she was, and surely, Jase could be patient long enough for her to get clean.
Allie sighed as the hot water swallowed her body, the bubbling jets pounding her skin. She squeezed out some body wash and lathered up, smiling as Jase's scent surrounded her. She'd smell like a man when she finished, but she'd be clean. She washed her hair and then anchored her feet against the edges to keep her head out of the water. She closed her eyes, trying to find solace from her thoughts.
It didn't help. He waited in the other room for her, but she didn't want to hear what he had to say. As much as she wanted to be with him, she didn't want to have another conversation about why he never wanted to see her again. Yes, his reasons were noble, but the fact was, he didn't want her near him. And that hurt like hell.
She'd been a fool to think she could convince him otherwise. Why did she even want to? His life was now firmly rooted in the dark and dangerous world that had taken his family from him. What kind of future could he have? After seeing the photo of his family, she was certain he'd never let go of his revenge. Yes, he could set her on fire with a glance, but a stable man who loved her would be a better choice.
Ryan.
He hadn't crossed her mind once since she'd left town. That was bad. Really, really bad. The best thing to do would be to find a way to convince Jase to stop sending money and then run home to Ryan and beg for forgiveness. At the moment, going home sounded more like a death sentence. But it wouldn't be. She could make a good life with Ryan if Jase would stay out of the way. It might not be thrilling, but it would be solid and dependable.
Maybe she should offer to make a trade with Jase—the info she'd gained today in exchange for a complete severing of their ties. Then he might get his vengeance, and she might get peace in return.
* * *
Jase could hear the water running in the adjacent bathroom as he entered his bedroom, and he realized his mistake. He deserved to be knocked upside the head for his stupidity. What the hell had he been thinking, bringing her to his house? She was his weakness, his Achilles heel. With her around, it was hard to stay focused on any goals. Hadn't he learned that the first go-round?
Not to mention the fact he feared for her life. He had to get her out of Chicago and fast. Even if it meant sending her back into the arms of the man who waited for her in California. He needed to do whatever it took to keep her safe.
He'd convinced himself that he hadn't taken her to her hotel because he couldn't be guaranteed of her safety. That part was certainly true. But he knew he'd brought her home to his place because that's where he wanted her. Close to him. It was easier to ignore the most recent hole in his heart when she was in Cali, but after he'd seen her last night, he needed her with him. Even if it was only until he could get her on a plane home.
But he'd made a fatal mistake in his planning because she was now in his bathroom. In his tub. Naked.
He was his own worst enemy.
When she took her sweet body out of the water, she wouldn't have any dry clothes to put on. She'd be walking around his whole house with nothing but a towel until her clothes arrived. His gaze slid to his bed. He couldn't help but remember the last time they'd been together. It had been a different bed, but still the reminder was there. She'd been so young then, but he hadn't been able to resist her. Now she was older, and if anything, more beautiful.
Shit.
He shoved a hand through his hair. He needed a haircut. More than that he needed to make sure she had dry clothes to wear. He strode to the phone and punched a number for service at the hotel below his penthouse.
"I need some clothes. Ladies clothes, size ten. Jeans and T-shirt, and if you can get them here in thirty minutes, I'll give you a hundred bucks." He could survive that long. He had to.
He hung up the phone, his gaze snagging on the photo of his family. The festering emotional knife that he used for motivation twisted deeper in his gut as he lifted the frame and tucked it inside a dresser drawer. Then he strode out to the living room, putting some much needed distance between him and the woman he couldn't forget.
* * *
A loud thunder vibrated the walls. Allie opened her eyes just as the lights flickered. Wow. That had been loud. The storm must be getting worse.
She blinked a few times, letting her heart rate slow. She couldn't believe she'd nodded off. The whole ordeal with Cates and then with Jase must have taken a toll on her. And, though she hated to admit it, she always felt safer and could relax when Jase was near.
Her water had cooled, and although it was tempting to fill the tub up with more hot water and enjoy the luxury, she'd probably better get out.
It was time to face the man in the other room. She needed to explain to Jase she was not going back to California until she got what she wanted. Then she needed to demand to be taken back to her hotel so that she could regain control of her life. It was just how it had to be. She wrapped herself in a fluffy sand-colored robe that smelled far too much like Jase and headed out the door.
She found him in the living room, standing next to the full-length windows, staring out. The scene was magnificent. Dazzling flashes of lightning escaped the black, rolling clouds and danced across the sky. Rain poured over the city as thunder rumbled through the air.
A brilliant flash illuminated the darkened room and was quickly followed by an alarming sound of thunder. The lights flickered again. Allie's mood grew more somber, and she found herself drawn forward by the brooding man showcased by mother nature's temper.
"My mom always told me to stay away from the windows during a thunderstorm."
Jase glanced at her, his face serious, as though he'd been deep in thought. "I think she meant stay away from an open window."
"Oh." That made sense. "You're probably right."
He leaned farther against the window frame, looking down at the streets below. She took a step forward, follow
ing his gaze. The amount of water pouring from the sky didn't seem to affect the number of cars on the street. Rain smeared the yellow headlights and red taillights into blurry streaks. The sky had grown blacker as the late afternoon faded into evening.
"Did you find me some clothes?"
He expelled a short breath that almost sounded like a laugh. Then again, it could have been exasperation. "They should be here in about 10 minutes."
She tightened the robe's sash, not sure what to think about Jase's mood. He was usually straightforward and certain with his words and actions. She didn't know how to respond to the introspective side of him. "I guess I can wait that long."
"Yeah," he answered absentmindedly. "Looks like you found my robe."
"I did. I hope you don't mind." The feel of the soft terry against her skin was suddenly unnerving. Her bath had left her smelling like him, and now, his clothes surrounded her.
He turned to her with an unreadable expression. "If I begged you to go back to California, would you?"
The question surprised her, and she took a moment to answer. "I guess that depends. Are you willing to stop putting money into my account?"
He sighed and turned back toward the window. "What difference does that make? Most people would be thrilled to have a few extra bucks deposited in their account each month."
Allie ran a hand through her damp hair as she moved away from him. A few extra bucks? She took a seat on one of the soft leather couches near him. "It makes a difference to me, Jase."
"Why—" Loud thunder interrupted him. "Why can't you let me take care of you a little bit?"
She pulled a nearby pillow to her and hugged it. "Because I don't need you to. I can do that myself."
He turned to her then. "What if you can't? What if something happens? Who will take care of you?"
If only he wanted to take care of her because he loved her. "Look, Jase. I appreciate your concern. But we both know this stems from what happened to your family. I realize you're having trouble moving on with your life. You're...stuck in this stupid plot for revenge." It broke her heart to watch it. "But I can't live that way. I need to leave this all in the past and move on to my future."
An odd look crossed his face. "So, do it. Go back to California. Get married. I'll leave you alone."
That wasn't what she wanted to hear. "You're agreeing then if I go back you'll leave me alone?" The sound of the rain against the windowpane grew louder. "Or only if I marry Ryan?"
"Ryan?" A shot of emotion darkened his eyes, but he quickly blinked it away. He shrugged. "If I know you're taken care of, I won't worry. You just need to get out of this city."
Allie studied him. His face might be a blank slate at the moment, but she'd seen the anguish in his eyes. Did he really care for her after all?
Honestly, she couldn't say she was over him. Maybe she should stay a little longer and try to help him. How could she leave him to suffer the cruel reality he'd created for himself?
"What if the Trasatti family was no longer a threat?" She might not have a future with him, but she knew she couldn't leave without trying to pull him out of his dark existence. "I found out some information that might help you."
He narrowed his gaze as his stance stiffened. "What do you mean?" He wouldn't take the next piece of information very well, but she had to tell him.
"I went to the police station today." She pulled the pillow tighter to her. "I assume you know this since you kidnapped me not far from there."
He didn't answer, but waited for her to continue.
"I spoke with Sergeant Cates—"
"I know Cates. Don't trust him."
"Why not?" She crossed her arms on top of the pillow, not liking the attack on her judgment. "He seems like a decent guy to me."
"Yeah, well, that tells me right there you're not capable of taking care of yourself."
Allie stood up and threw the pillow at him. "You can be such a jerk. Obviously, you don't need to hear anything I have to say."
She headed for the bedroom. She'd wait in there until her clothes arrived, and then she'd leave, torrential rain or not.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
"Allie." Jase caught her arm before she left the room. "I'm sorry. That was unwarranted."
She pulled free. "You're damn right it was. I deserve a little respect. I'm not a nineteen-year-old kid anymore."
He had the decency to look repentant. "You're right. Please, come back and tell me what Cates said."
She hesitated, not sure she wanted to continue the conversation. In the end, she knew she would cave. "Fine." She walked back into the room, but didn't take a seat. Instead, she went to stand by the window where Jase had been moments before. He joined her there and insisted they sit down.
"First of all, why don't you tell me why you don't like Cates," she said, her hand bumping the cold window.
Jase exhaled. "He's cocky. I tried to work with him years ago, but he's an ass. Only looking out for himself, and he won't release any information."
Allie curved her lips into a smile. "Really? Because I had no trouble getting info at all." She shrugged and gave him a flirtatious blink of her eyes, glad that she now had the upper hand. "Of course, he does have a soft spot for women's legs."
"Shit." Jase shook his head. "That's exactly why I don't trust the jerk. He obviously can be bought."
"You're just jealous."
"You're damn right, I am." Jase eyed her with a serious look, and her lighthearted feeling flipped right into an intense sexual awareness. A very dangerous place for her to be.
She licked her suddenly dry lips. "Well." She pretended she hadn't noticed the surge of energy that had nothing to do with the electrical storm raging outside. "I did learn a few things from Cates. Did you know there was a politician killed three days before Joey's murder? His name was Gregory Winslow."
Jase nodded. "I remember the story. Some guy connected with the Trasatti organization killed him. I always figured there was more to it than what we'd heard."
"Exactly." Allie nodded. "More often than not, the organization pays someone to take the hit for them. That's exactly what happened this time, too, only they didn't pay him well enough. After he was incarcerated, he told a different story, one where Franco Trasatti pulled the trigger."
"The big guy, huh? It surprises me he'd get personally involved." He scratched the stubble on his jaw. "Winslow must have really pissed him off."
Allie agreed. "I guess he had some good dirt on Trasatti, and he was in a position to use it." She jumped when a huge boom of thunder shook the window panes. "That one was close. I think it's time for me to move away from the windows—whether they're opened or closed." She gave him a nervous chuckle and stood.
He grabbed her hand, keeping her from leaving. "No, come on. Hang with me here for a little while longer. The show outside is amazing." He grinned. "Even if it's a little unnerving."
She hesitated, knowing it would be a mistake to pretend he wanted to share this moment with her because he loved her.
"We're safe, and I'll protect you." He tugged her back to the window seat, sitting closer to her than he had before.
She swallowed and tried to focus on their conversation. "I was saying, the part I found really interesting was Cates said somehow Joey might have witnessed the murder and recorded it." She smiled, proud she'd managed to uncover some useful information. "I'm sure that's why they killed Joey."
He scowled at her. "Allie." He shook his head as though greatly disappointed. "You have no business getting involved again. The information you just gave me is dangerous to know."
What? "How can you say that? Doesn't this help you at all?" And here she thought he'd be grateful.
"I appreciate the info, but look what we went through to get you a new life. Why can't you let me worry about this, and you stay safe?" He stopped and took a deep breath. "Men died protecting you. You have a good life. You need to go back to it."
She leaned away from him. "That's just it. You'v
e helped me get a better life, and I'm extremely grateful. But I didn't ask anyone to protect me. And it's my life. If I can't make my own choices and go where I want to go, what good is it?"
"At least, you're alive." He said the words softly, but his eyes were full of meaning.
It was more than she could take. She stood up. "I'm tired of being grateful. Tired of feeling like I owe the world just because I'm alive. I live my life looking over my shoulder, worried someone's coming after me. You don't love me, but you won't stop sending money. Ryan says he loves me, but he won't be with me until you butt out." She threw her hands in the air. "I feel like everyone owns my life but me."
Jase rose, standing mere inches from her. "I'm sorry."
His apology didn't help. In fact, it made things worse. "That is not what I wanted to hear." She held up her hands in a frustrated gesture. "I don't want your pity. I just want everyone to quit telling me what to do and leave me the hell alone."
"I can't." His whispered answer was in direct contradiction to her loud tone, and it sucked out all her anger.
"Why?" The crazy ping-pong of her emotions made her want to cry. "If you can't love me, why can't you just let me be?"
She could sense the emotions warring inside him, too, and she felt torn. She wanted desperately to assert her independence, but more than that, she wanted to hear him say he needed her, too.
He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her against him. "I can't because—"
He stopped and looked away as though what he wanted to say was stuck somewhere deep inside him. And somehow she knew the words were what she wanted to hear most.
Allie pushed against him, not accepting his withdrawal. "Why, Jase?"
His gaze returned to her, full of fire and anguish. "Because I love you. Okay? I've loved you from the moment I hauled you over my shoulder and threw you into the car. When your eyes met mine as we hunched down with bullets flying overhead, I knew I could never walk away from you."
His declaration stunned her. She remembered that moment, vividly, wondering if they'd make it out alive. Did she know, even back then, this man would play such an important role in her life?
