Only he couldn't tell them, because he wasn’t there. Not for the stuff that mattered.
Closing the top to the nearly-full garbage can, he turned around and wiped his sweaty brow. It wasn’t even nine in the morning yet, and it was already scorching outside. Memphis had a way of putting people in a bad mood early in the day, so by nightfall they were innately ready to kill someone.
He looked up at the clear blue skies above the evergreen trees in the yard and yawned at the serene beauty. It was time to get ready for work. Time for enjoyment to be over and for hell to begin again. He had been lounging long enough. He and Carmen had had breakfast together, rolled around in the bed a little more and taken a shower. It was time now to meet the reality of the day. His fantasy was slowly coming to an end.
In a casual stroll, still taking time to enjoy the sound of chirping birds perched up in the towering trees on the tranquil lane, he contemplated how to handle his current situation.
This was the third night that he had spent at Carmen’s house, and while she was great company, he knew that he was wearing out his welcome. It was time for him to go home and have another look at things. Besides, he was still on this investigation, and if he stayed too long he might bring trouble to her doorstep. Still there was a part of him that was severely paranoid. If Agosto’s house had been bugged, his could have been too. Of course, he had the place checked, but he still didn't feel comfortable. Although, he doubt that he ever would feel comfortable again until this case was solved.
The pressure was ramping and he felt like he was at a standstill. Maybe that’s what whoever was behind this wanted.
They knew that media frenzy would ensue and the road to solving the murders would turn to complete gridlock.
Going through the back porch of the old bricked bungalow style home, he kicked off his running shoes on the mat and walked into the kitchen where Carmen was pouring more coffee. She turned from the mug and smiled at him.
“Fixed you another cup,” she said, tugging at her short, powder pink terry cloth robe.
Johnson walked up behind her and kissed the nape of her neck. “Thanks,” he growled. “I can never get used to seeing you in pink.” Wrapping his arm around her waist, he pulled her closer to him and nearly picked her up off the ground.
“Why?” she laughed.
“You always wear black slacks, blue top, boots and a gun for starters. Cops don’t wear pink.” In truth, he liked it. He liked seeing more of her than just the tough exterior she had to put on when she was on duty.
“Some days I wear a black top instead of a blue one. I try to mix it up,” she joked.
Carmen was a busty brunette with startling green eyes and full pink lips. Her body was a thing of beauty built in the gym and hard, long hours in the field. Her Italian heritage was evident in the warm tones of her olive hue and huskiness of her sultry voice. She was in fact the most beautiful woman that Johnson had ever seen.
Having worked her way up the ranks on her own despite her father, Deputy Chief Magnelli’s efforts to influence her career, she had drawn a hard line between work and family. At home, Magnelli was her father, but at work, she regarded him with distance and only came in contact with him a few times out of the year.
Because of her last name, Carmen had been a prize sought after by many officers either looking to climb the ranks or with ulterior motives. Hundreds of bar bets had been placed in her name and thousands of cheesy lines had been used to get her attention over the years. But she had steered clear of anyone who even remotely seemed anxious. She knew that many of the officers that her father had burned over the years saw her as a trophy, something to dangle in front of the old man’s face in an effort to stick it to him where everyone knew it would hurt most. But Magnelli had taught her well, making her privy even as a young girl to men and their devious intentions. Plus she was no angel.
Once she had fallen prey to a man on the force, a Sergeant that she had fallen in love with on Delta Shift at the Tillman precinct. Her father had been petrified at the union and in complete disapproval of the man’s background. Their affair had spawned a rollercoaster relationship that had resulted in one beautiful child and one ugly divorce. However, being on center stage had taught her one lesson. It was always best that she keep her affairs private. She had done so since the divorce, dating inconspicuously or not at all.
And then one night after partying downtown with a few of her closest female cop friends, she stumbled upon Johnson in the wee hours of the morning at Alex’s Tavern, a dank, dark old cop hangout that was thick with cigarette smoke and greasy burger residue. It had been a cornerstone of the department for decades and the only place in town to get a cold beer at four in the morning.
Johnson was sitting by the jukebox with his feet propped up on the table having a beer with a few other off-duty cops. He was laughing about something. His voice so loud and dominant that it rumbled in her chest. She remembered that his dark jeans had fit his muscular legs so inappropriately until when he leisurely shifted she tried to sneak a peak in between his thighs. The tattoos that ran down his arms seemed to make his large muscles bulge that much more. His skin was glowing tan even in the darkness of the room and his face was chiseled to perfection, every detail a mirror of perfection from his thick eyebrows to his perfectly shaped nose, his squared, wide jaw and the irritatingly sexy dimple in his chin. His thick neck led down to cascading muscles from his shoulders to his pecks to his flat stomach, all taut and rippling, begging to be touched.
Eye contact was immediate.
In mid-laughter, he had sat up erect in his chair and watched her as she made her way across the room with her friends.
The Eagles were playing on the box. Hotel California set the mood for something sinister. Highlights of the Lakers vs. Grizzlies game were playing on the television across from him. But at the moment that they spotted each other, the room went silent.
She had tried to ignore him, ignore the devilish grin and wide playfulness of his naughty mouth. His eyes sparkled like a deer in headlights and his wreaked of unadulterated sex.
And that was all that she thought that she wanted from him. Pure, animal-like, lust-filled, hardcore, heart pounding, sweat pouring, candy-laced sex.
Johnson had not disappointed. In fact, he more than performed.
They had spent the morning talking and the afternoon in his bed. The evening was spent asleep, trying to recover from the best sex that she had ever had.
The rest had been downhill since then.
She had figured Johnson for just another cute cop with a huge cock that she could easily discard when she was done playing, but he had not been so easy to get away from. There was a part of him that though guarded well was genuine and undeniably special. He made her laugh, made her think and worst of all, he made her dream.
But Carmen was a smart woman. She had kept their sordid affair a secret, never leading on that he was the only one, the singular person in her mind and her heart. She could not bear to reveal such a thing to him no matter how he confessed a desire to be with her and only her.
In fact, she encouraged his indiscretions. As long as he was in another woman’s bed, he couldn’t be stealing her heart….or at least what was left of it.
Taking her from her thoughts, Johnson sat down on the stool by the island and leaned his large arm on the counter. “You know what I mean. Nothing about you is girly.”
She took offense. “You just don't know me well enough.” She hated herself instantly for saying it. It just opened up the door for an unwanted conversation.
He looked up from the hot, steamy mug and bit his lip. “I want to know you better but you won’t let me.” He broached the subject again for the hundredth time.
Carmen huffed and sat down beside him. “Johnson.”
“My name is Luke,” he corrected. “We’re sleeping together. I think you can call me by my first name. It’s been months.”
“Johnson,” she said, ignoring him, “you and I ha
ve two things in common that I like in a relationship.” She counted them off on her fingers. “One - we’re both cops. So we know the score. I don’t have to worry about you complaining that a case is ruining our relationship or that I’m gone too long. Two-we both believe in a casual relationship to save each other from getting hurt. Now, there is only one of those two things that's a double-edge sword and that’s the part about us both being cops. I was married to a cop for five years.” She should her head emphatically in disgust. The memory of the man made her want to gag.
“How many times do I have to say that I’m not him,” Johnson protested.
“It was the worse five years of my life except for the birth of my daughter. You haven’t been married. You have no idea. Okay. I know how these things go. Our relationship will interfere with our careers and our careers will then interfere with our relationship. Let’s just keep it simple. We see each other when we see each other and that’s that.” She swallowed down a deep breath with her well-covered lie.
Johnson picked up the coffee cup and sipped it. “It’s not that simple for me.”
“When I met you, Johnson, you were a certified, four-legged dog straight out of the pound looking for a bitch in heat. You have slept with half of the heterosexual women on the force. You’re part of an initiation for goodness sake. You’re like that board that football players jump up and hit before they run out of the locker room onto the field.”
Johnson coughed. There was one thing about Carmen. She was definitely hard around the edges. He tried to stay focused on the key point instead of allowing her investigative tactics to cloud the conversation. He knew that she wanted to unnerve him. She was good at providing diversions, but they wouldn’t work on him this time. “Go on and make jokes if it makes you feel safer. The point is no matter how many women that I’ve slept with, I’ve finally found the one for me. I’m serious. So serious until I think that we should tell your father. I think that’s the only thing holding you back.”
“My father would hate you, but no that’s not the reason.”
“What’s the reason?” He looked her dead in her eyes.
“I just told you the reason.” She looked back and raised her brow. “No matter how many times you ask, it’s not going to change.”
“Carmen, why are you so afraid of me? You’ve obviously got all of the control.” His tone was low and serious. The words were so clear, so filled with meaning until she knew that it was not a lie.
His tone caught her off guard. “I don't want control,” she answered, wing-like lashes flapping.
“You want a toy? Do you like playing with my heart?” he asked with a frown.
“No and no.” She rolled her tongue around her teeth. “What if lack of control is the only thing that has you here? What if once you gain that control, you go right back to being the Johnson that everyone has always known?”
“What if I don’t? What if I want to settle down, have a relationship, move in and do monogamous shit together?” He tilted his head. “What if it just you that makes me a better man?”
Carmen rolled her eyes. Now he was just being a drama queen, trying to win an argument and have the last word. She had to remember that. “What makes you think that you care about me anyway? Because you stayed more than one night at my house? Because I saved your number in my cell phone?” Her neck rolled as she made her point, brow raised to an extreme point.
Johnson refused to give up. “Hey, I know my own feelings. A man doesn’t feel like this every day. You’re different from the others and you make me different. I like being around you and Laila.” Why was he having to argue this point? In his entire life, he had fallen in love just this once and she was making it as hard on him as she could.
Carmen folded her arms. “Don’t bring her into this.” She hated to discuss her daughter or use her as a pawn in their relationship, but she knew that her five-year old was crazy about Johnson, especially after he had volunteered to take her to the father/daughter dance when her ex-husband cancelled on her the night of the event.
He pulled at Carmen’s arm. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?” she asked, guard up now. Ever so slightly she edged a centimeter away, but even with just a minor shift in their proximity, Johnson could feel it. She was his magnet.
“Shut me out.” He swallowed down his pride and the coffee. “Are you sleeping with someone else then?” He didn’t quite know how he’d handle it if she said yes. Still, he had to ask the question in order to make the point if the answer was in his favor.
“No, I’m not,” she said quickly. “But that doesn’t mean that just because it’s just you for now that I want to complicate my life with a committed relationship.”
His eye twitched. “Especially for me, right?” Even he had to admit that he didn’t think he was good enough for her, but women like her were never attracted to the guys who were good enough. They liked bad boys; guys who barely returned a text the morning after and never stayed the night; guys who drove fast, flashy cars and spent countless hours in the gym to get a woman’s attention but never took the time to notice any woman he had been with.
No, they didn’t like good enough.
They liked worthless.
Women complained continuously about the kind of guy he was, but they couldn’t stay away from him. They wanted to be fucked within an inch of their lives, made to feel as though there was no one more important or beautiful on the earth besides them, made to feel as though the bad boy couldn’t live without them and then cry and moan when they were discarded days if not hours later.
And in the past, that was him down to the last detail.
Even now with other women that was still him, but with Carmen being the bad guy, the worthless all wrong choice wasn’t an option anymore.
Too bad she didn’t believe him.
Too bad she might very well like him the way that he used to be.
Too bad he couldn’t change back.
Carmen rolled her eyes again at the sight of him sulking but relaxed her shoulders at his confession. She knew that she was being too hard on him, but she also knew that she was dealing with a reforming player…basically chopped liver. “It’s not that. I just…I can’t go back to that life, Johnson. It made me want to pull my hair out. All the fighting and the drama.” She unfolded her arms and touched his face. “What we have now works.” Her voice pleaded for his understanding.
Johnson flashed his amber eyes her way. “For you?”
“For us,” she said, standing up and snaking around him. Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she kissed the tip of his nose. “Besides, you’re too sexy to pout.” Playfully, she made a sad face. “And there are so many other things we could be doing right besides fighting.”
He rubbed her lower back and rested his hand on her bottom. “You know, you can’t always change the subject with this,” he said looking down the front of her robe at her ample breasts. He licked his lips. “I mean…I might forget for a minute but it’s going to come back up.”
She kissed his ear and bit his lobe. “What’s going to come back up?” Pushing in between his legs, she ran a hand down his black gym shorts and felt his erection.
“Sometimes, I think you only mess with me because of him,” Johnson said, biting his lip.
Carmen chuckled. “Well he is ten very thick inches of…steel.”
“A girl’s best friend,” Johnson said, standing up. “Come on. Let’s go upstairs.”
Just then, his cell phone started to vibrate on the table. Picking it up, he cursed under his breath before answering.
“Hello,” he said, watching Carmen walk in front of him and drop her robe to the floor. Completely naked, she made her way to the back stairwell that led upstairs and turned to look at him.
“God,” he muttered.
She smiled and pulled her hair down out of its ponytail.
He rubbed his growing erection and pushed his phone closer to his ear. “Yes sir. I’m on my way.”
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Hanging up the phone, he walked pulling down his shorts to reveal his gorging manhood.
“I thought you had to go?” she asked, holding on to him as he scooped her up in his arms.
“They can wait ten minutes,” he said firmly.
“Ten minutes?” She frowned.
“Beggars can’t be choosers,” he said, carrying her up the stairs.
14
On the twelfth floor of 201 Poplar, the headquarters of the Memphis Police Department, beyond the reach of the hungry reporters who were camped out below, Johnson’s lieutenant sat patiently waiting for him to arrive while he listened to Director Amway speak firmly with someone on the phone.
When he had come in, Amway was on the phone and had remained occupied, waiting on Johnson’s arrival. All he wanted was a minute to ask what the meeting was about. He didn’t like going in just as blind as the men that he commanded. A little Intel would have been nice…a common courtesy that any high-ranking officer would have expected.
Still, he was made to wait.
He tried to act as if he wasn’t paying attention, but the tone of the conversation between Amway and the mysterious caller had taken on such intensity that it pulled him out of his thoughts and propelled him to move closer to the bathroom door. Amway was inside, holed up and sounding like he was ready to tear his own hair out.
Abruptly, the call ended, and from what the lieutenant could tell, it did not end well. He stepped quickly away from the door and made his way over to the window.
Amway stepped out of the bathroom and wiped his brow. The discussion had obviously gotten the best of him. Sweating profusely, he went over to his desk and dug through some paperwork until he found what he was looking for. Clutching a card in his hand, he looked up as Deputy Chief Magnelli knocked and entered the office.
The World in Reverse Page 14