“Right? I can see him wishing alpacas roam the streets.”
“They do have lovely, soft fur.”
“And have better manners than their llama cousins.”
“Llamas should realize spitting is socially unacceptable and clean up their acts.”
“Then they can tell the camels, and their family might get more love.”
We sit there in easy silence for a while before he bumps shoulders with me. “You’re rocking the druid thing, sista. We’re all mega proud of you, but we worry too. Remember to take time for yourself. This afternoon you were way too tired. Don’t let yourself get run down like that.”
“Sloan and I joked that when this is over, we should spend a week with King Henry’s drapes pulled and hide away in his bed.”
“Go on.” He waggles his dark brows and flashes a smile. “How’s the private time going with the studly Sloan?”
“Really good, but I meant sleeping.”
“Sleeping, eh? That’s disappointing.”
I chuckle. “That’s as far as we’ve gotten. I don’t want to make assumptions or mistakes with him. He’s too important to me, us, Gran, and Granda. We’re taking it slow.”
“No one ever took it slower than Kevin and I, and it turned out pretty well. Seriously, we waited eleven years.”
I laugh. “You met when you were five.”
“It still was a long wait.”
“True. You and Kev inspire me. I want that.”
Calum takes my hand from where it lies on my thigh and kisses my knuckles. “I have no doubt you’ll have it. You deserve every happiness this world offers, baby girl. You inspire us every day.”
I hug Calum’s arm and take a mental snapshot. The Irish countryside is so much darker here at night than anywhere in Toronto. It’s eerie, but it’s cool.
“Look at that.” Sloan appears behind us. “Yer exactly where I left ye, safe and sound. That’s such a refreshin’ surprise.”
“Hey, surly,” I roll to the side and get up and away from the ledge. “I’m not a total danger magnet. There are moments when things go smoothly.”
Sloan chuckles. “Be sure to point them out. I don’t want to miss one.”
“Har-har, you’re hilarious.” Swallowing, I tilt my head to the side and catch Patty’s attention. “Can I talk to you for a second in private?”
“Sure. Why the long face?”
When we’re far enough from the others that I can speak to him privately, I fill him in on our day’s events: finding out about the shillelagh, stealing it from The Witch’s Brew, then giving it to Jimmy in barter for the details about tonight and the four casks at the purification plant.
“I’m sorry, buddy.” I rub the ache in my chest when I see the disappointment in his gaze. “I pride myself on loyalty, but I was stuck with this one. I needed those casks, and I figured if I help you get them back, it might make up for it a little.”
Patty waves his stubby fingers in the air and shakes his head. “Och, I don’t care about that old chunk of wood. My ex-wife gave me that thing. Sure, it gave me great luck when we were together, but the moment we ended things, that shillelagh turned nasty. It’s like a harbinger of doom. I’m afraid whoever ends up with it is in fer a rude awakenin’.”
“So, you’re not mad?”
“With you? Never. Ye did what ye thought was right and that’s all I can ask.”
“Then why did you look so upset?”
“Because the beauty of havin’ a secret lair is the ‘secret’ part. Through no fault of yers, a dozen of yer friends and family have been through there this week. Before that, the witches came through. Baba Yaga knows where we are. And now a band of mercenaries has the location. It doesn’t sit right with me at all. I think the queen and I will have to find ourselves a new place to live.”
“I’m so sorry.”
He pats my hand and winks. “Don’t give it another thought, Fi. It was bound to happen one day. I’d rather move than have more intrusions into our private space.”
“I suppose.” Still, I feel awful. “If I can help, let me know. Oh…will I still be able to portal there or are you talking super-secret?”
Patty frowns. “Yer family, Fi. We’ll make sure yer portal band still works. Ye need to keep tabs on the kids, after all.”
I nod, thankful to make the cut. “I do. Thanks for not being mad, Patty. I was worried.”
Patty shakes his head. “Don’t give it a second thought. Of all the gold, gems, and priceless things I own, yer one of my greatest treasures, Fi. Let the world steal from my hoard. As long as yer well, we’re good.”
I hug him and take the first deep breath of the day. “Thanks, oul man. I didn’t know you were such a romantic.”
“Och, it’s a curse, I swear. How do ye think I ended up with thirty-six ex-wives?”
“Thirty-six? Wow. How did I not know that?”
“Weel, that’s a tale for another night.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
The Ireland heirs arrive bursting with energy and bouncing on the balls of their feet. Thankfully, Nikon arrives with our Toronto backup team almost immediately after. I’m both surprised and thrilled to have everyone here. “Emmet and Dillan, don’t you have to work?”
“We’re on afternoons,” Dillan says. “The real question is ‘don’t we have to sleep?’”
Emmet shrugs. “And apparently, the answer is no. So, we’re set to go.”
I blow them a kiss and get started. “Okay, so, here’s what we know and what we suspect. The witches we caught last night—gawd was that only last night?”
“Seems like a week ago,” Sloan says.
It does. “Anyway, Garnet’s associates, Jimmy and the mercenaries interrogated the witches.”
“Hashtag, tortured.” Da frowns.
“Not necessarily. They might have some kind of a psychic info puller on their crew. We don’t know.”
“Och, I’m fairly certain I know.”
Cranky pants. “I’d argue, but you’re Irish so there’s no point. Also, they aren’t the most scrupulous bunch, so you’re probably right.”
“I usually am.”
“Point to you. You usually are.” Turning back to the others, I continue. “In some manner of information extraction, the witches confirmed that their end goal was to come here on the eve of Samhain when the veil between realms is thinnest, and contact an Unseelie prince.”
“What for?” Aiden asks.
“From the sounds of it, to put themselves up for an orgy offering and win his favor.”
Aiden’s brow arches. “Have they tried Tinder?”
“I think it’s less about the hookup and more about entering into a partnership with a powerful dark fae.”
“To what end?” Da asks.
“Undetermined. More power would be my first guess.”
“Does the sinister sex partner know about this arrangement?”
“Not that we know of. From what we heard, it’s kind of a first impression thing.”
Emmet snorts. “Hi, howeyah, we brought you Source energy, fae mutants, and a boner bonus bonanza. Will you be our baleful bae?
“How about my heinous horndog?” Calum adds.
“Or my murderous love-muffin,” Dillan says.
“Woeful Wookie?” Tad chimes in.
I raise my hand to slow their roll. “Yeah, that’s about it.”
“Sweet deal for him,” Emmet says.
“Are the last casks down there?” Dora looks a little lost in my brothers’ chatter.
“We’ve managed to track down and secure all but one. Supposedly, it’s here as part of the offering.”
“You’ve been busy, girlfriend,” Dora says. “No wonder you look so tired.”
I nod. “After this is over, consider me on vacation for a month. Seriously, I’m shutting off the world.”
“It would be good to confirm that the cask is here and how heavily it’s guarded,” Dillan says.
“I sent Bruin to
scope things out. He should’ve been back by now.” I glance over my shoulder and stare out across the dark expanse. “I hope everything is all right.”
Tad chuckles. “You hope Bruin, an ancient bear spirit and the unstoppable killing warrior, is safe against a bunch of posturing dark witches that won’t even know he’s breezing through their midst?”
“Well, fine. When you say it like that…”
“It’s hard not to worry when danger abounds, mo chroi. It’s natural.” Da squeezes my arm. “What do ye think about the cloven courter? Will he engage in a fight against us or step back and stay out of it?”
No one seems to have an opinion about that.
“I vote he takes his leave and bows out.”
The wind picks up, and Bruin manifests beside us. “Well, now the gang’s all here. Hello all.”
Da nods. “What did you find out, Bear?”
“It’s a sight to be seen down there, I’ll tell ye.”
“What do ye mean?”
“It’s like a Jamaican hedonist resort surrounded by a carnival freak show. Between the outer rings, there are fifty or more mutant fae abominations, and in the inner rings, all the women are naked and oilin’ themselves up in front of a cluster of civilians.”
Tad busts up laughing. “How does yer spirit bear know about Jamaican hedonist resorts, Cumhaill? Where have ye been takin’ him, and why wasn’t I invited?”
I flick my hand through the air to wave that image out of my head and sigh. “Your internet privileges will be scrutinized a lot more closely, Bear. Seriously, I’m putting on the parenting filters.”
“Back to the problem at hand,” Da says. “Why are there civilians here?”
Bruin shakes his head and his long fur flutters around his face. “By the look of things, they’re volunteers to transform for the guest of honor.”
Emmet grunts. “They’re volunteering to drink the killer Kool-Aid? That’s whacked.”
“People are so stupid,” Dillan snaps.
“Now, now.” Da sends them both a quelling look. “Dial back the condemnation. We don’t know the situation. Maybe they were misled or compelled in some way. It’s not our place to judge. The point is, now we also have to secure them, clear their memories, and deposit them back into their lives.”
“Sloan and I can clear them after things are taken care of,” Ciara says.
“So, back to the oily rubdowns,” Calum says. “I’m not looking forward to seeing Moira’s girl parts in battle.”
Bear chuckles. “There are others for you to face off against. I admit I got distracted enough to forget to come straight back.”
I roll my eyes. “And here I was getting worried.”
His deep, bass laughter says he’s not sorry.
“Naked isn’t good,” Sarah says.
“How so?” Dillan asks. “Works for me.”
He raises his hands when we all turn and scowl. “I mean, if they’re all naked, they aren’t carrying weapons, they can’t run off and blend, and they might even be distracted about facing off with an army of studly dudes. Geez, such dirty minds.”
I chuckle. “All right, you talked your way out of that one like a boss.”
“Thank you.”
I gesture at Sarah to continue. “What did you mean by naked not being good?”
“Well, if they were in robes, we could at least try to infiltrate and get closer. With all the women naked, there’s no chance.”
Emmet chuckles. “Weeeel, that’s not quite true. You girls could take one for the team.”
I give my brother a droll stare. “We’re not getting naked. They know the women in their group, dumbass. Then they’d capture us and as Dillan said, we’d have no weapons and wouldn’t be able to run off and blend.”
“You’d have Birga,” Emmet corrects.
“The girls aren’t gettin’ naked, Emmet,” Da says. “We’ll have to encircle the stones and come in from all sides in a coordinated assault.”
“Agreed,” Sloan says. “And sooner rather than later. Bruin, was the cask there? Either Nikon, Tad, or I should commit to getting to it and flashing it out.”
“You do that,” I say. “You know where to stash them and can get back here for the fight. Then we’ll transport all of them back to where they belong, and we’re finished.”
“Not entirely,” Sarah says. “I want justice for my coven. We won’t be done until that’s taken care of.”
I nod. “Agreed. Sarah gets justice for her lost coven sisters. Then we’re done.”
“Agreed,” the others say.
Emmet looks at the heirs and chuckles. “You were jelly because we get all the action, weren’t you?”
“Um…yeah,” Tad deadpans. “Share the battles, bro. Some of us have trained our entire lives and been sitting on our thumbs.”
Da arches a brow. “Well, with a moat full of mutants to deal with as well as the witches, the more, the merrier.”
Emmet nods. “Da brought us up right. We know how to share. We’ll probably need a distraction, don’t you think?”
“No. We should be good.”
Sloan fights back a smile. “No, Niall, I think Emmet’s right. If I’m portaling in to go for the cask, an Emmet distraction is likely a solid idea.”
Da rolls his eyes and shrugs. “Fine, Emmet. Delight us with yer strategic wit.”
Emmet fist-pumps the air. “Oh, I will. And thanks, Irish. You win big points for making this happen. In fact, I’m taking you off boyfriend probation.”
Sloan smiles. “Much appreciated.”
I peg Emmet with a look. “Do we get a hint on the distraction or is it a surprise?”
Emmet grins wide. “Oh, it’s a surprise.”
Tad, Nikon, and Sloan take us down to the rings in three groups. The plan is set. Draw the witches away from the cask so Sloan can get in and get out. While he’s busy doing that, the rest of us will assess the fae creatures and capture the witches—sedating them when possible.
That last part is Sarah’s addition.
It makes me wonder what she meant when she said it won’t be over until she gets her justice. What does a witch’s revenge look like when it’s demanded by a passive white witch who believes in harm none?
The way the rings are set, there’s a small rise in the landscape as we move closer to the center. A wide circle of stacked stones divides each ring. They stand six feet tall in some places and up to twelve feet thick. From the rooftop where we observed, we couldn’t grasp the sense of how truly involved the stonework is.
It’s quite impressive.
It also plays to our benefit because when we materialize on the outside edge of the rings, no one can see us.
“So far so good—”
I jinx us, and Moira Morrigan lights the bonfire with her arms extended toward the night sky.
Prince Keldane, our Unseelie male,
Visit us from behind the veil.
With offerings of both flesh and power,
Our intentions lain this sacred hour.
A joining of both body and aim,
To dominate and lay your claim.
I blink at Dillan. “I guess that covers things.”
Dillan chuckles. “If I were in charge of the spell writing, I would’ve finished with more of a hook…
So, slip on through the faery glass,
To get you some dark witch ass.”
“I like it. Catchy and super classy.”
Dillan nods. “I’m a poet.”
Something shifts in the night and a call of darkness tugs at me. My eyes sting as the glamor burns away and my freaky night vision activates.
Dammit. I’m not immune to the taint of Morgana’s darkness after all. Still, being able to see the witches highlighted against the darkness is a boon. I choose to take the silver lining for what it’s worth.
Sloan frowns. “When yer brother activates his signal, I’m goin’ straight for the cask. Call yer armor and watch yer back until I’m done and can wat
ch it for ye, yeah?”
I call forward my body armor, and my skin hardens to shield me from physical damage. “Don’t spill any of that pink liquid on you. I try not to judge, but I don’t think I can love you if you’re a fae mutant who tries to eat my face.”
“Understood. I wouldn’t think less of ye for it either.”
Calum crouch-runs over to us and flashes hand signals. I interpret and whisper in Sloan’s ear. “Everyone’s in position. We’re holding until the signal.”
Sloan nods and takes a guarded peek over the rise of stones. Turning back, he points at his eyes and into the circle, giving me a thumbs up.
He sees the cask. Good. That’s good.
The wind picks up, and I grip my hair as it smacks against my face. The sky above lights up as if we’re in a drive-in theater and the projector is using the night as a backdrop screen. The sepia scene above is of a wooden farmhouse caught in the tumultuous winds of a twister. “Auntie Em?” The house spins and spins until it comes down with a thud, and all that’s left of the witch it crushes is her shoes.
I chuckle at my brother’s sense of humor and grab my hair as wild wind sweeps over the stone circles bringing the impact of the images to life. Nice touch.
Moira drops her arms at the end of repeating her incantation for the third time. Like every witch in the circle, she looks up at the sky as the iconic scene plays out.
The movie breaks into a chorus of Munchkins singing Ding Dong The Witch is Dead, and Moira searches her surroundings.
Too bad. So sad.
By then, Sloan has poofed in and poofed out.
Da, Emmet, Dora, Sarah, and I are the ones taking on the witches on the inner ring from our side. Nikon, Dillan, Aiden, and Patty are coming in from the opposite side. Bruin gets to Killer Clawbearer his way through the crowd as he likes, and Tad, Ciara, and the others from the heir’s group are on mutant guard dog duty.
“We’ve been robbed,” Moira shrieks.
I chuckle as I Bo Duke it over the stone wall. “Technically, you’re the thieves. We’re the repo officers.”
Moira throws her hand out, and a bolt of purple magic shoots at me. I barely manage to drop to the grass in time to evade. Still, the crackle of the power surge it gives off singes my shirt.
A Witch’s Revenge (Chronicles of an Urban Druid Book 4) Page 25
