“Bishop!” she exclaimed.
“Can I come in?” Mose nearly bowled her over as he brushed past. He felt better now that he was out of plain sight.
Bethany still looked puzzled. She bounced down on the couch and motioned for him to do the same. “What a surprise. I’m trying to collect myself. What on earth?”
Mose laughed. “Well, it’s not hard to figure. I’ve come to see you.”
“Me!” The puzzlement still hadn’t left.
“Yah,” Mose acknowledged. He wasn’t sure how to proceed exactly, but he felt perfectly at home here. That much comforted him. This might actually work, he told himself.
Bethany still stared at him. “Are you hungry perhaps?”
Mose laughed again. “I’ve had supper, thanks.”
For the first time, Mose noticed the faces of Bethany’s two small girls peering out from the kitchen.
Bethany followed his gaze and stood up to shoo them into the bedroom, where she closed the door. With a smile Bethany lowered herself back onto the couch. “This is quite unexpected, Bishop, but a great honor.”
Bethany had begun to comprehend, Mose told himself. He allowed a smile to creep over his face. “Your brother has spoken highly of you. I thought I would speak with you myself on the matter. Time is slipping away, you know. I’m not getting any younger, and neither are you.” He gave her an appraising look. Bethany would definitely need to lose some weight, but he would deal with that later.
She had colored slightly. “I thought you were writing to Miriam Yoder. Didn’t you make a trip out there not so long ago?”
Bethany knew good and well that he had, but Mose nodded as if this were a serious question. “My duties did call me out there, but I’m back now to stay. And my relationship with Miriam… well, you don’t have to worry about that. It may be at an end.”
That didn’t make a whole lot of sense, but Bethany didn’t seem bothered.
“My girls and I have greatly appreciated your sermons, Bishop.” Bethany’s smile was nervous. “I’m glad you’ve come tonight. I had never dared hope this day would come.” She laid her hand on his arm, and he didn’t pull back. There was no need to, and he did appreciate her admiration.
“I’m glad you do,” he said.
“Our souls have been fed greatly, Bishop. More than I can ever say. The Lord has clearly been at work in our community of late, even if I must say so when my brother was also in the lot for bishop.”
“Then the Kemp family didn’t take things too hard?” Mose gave her a sideways glance. He hadn’t planned to speak on this matter, but she had brought it up.
“There are no hard feelings.” Her hand stroked his arm. “We saw clearly what the Lord’s will was, and everything since has pointed in that direction.”
Mose cleared his throat. “Then I might as well say why I’m here. I need a frau, Bethany. Would you consent to say the vows with me before too long?”
Bethany got on her knees with tears in her eyes. She clung to his hand with both of hers. “Words fail me, Bishop. You know what my answer is. What else could I say, but yah? I never dared dream of this day.”
“Then come up!” he ordered. “We are to kneel only before the Lord.”
Bethany trembled and struggled to stand. She lowered herself back on the couch.
“When can this happen?” Mose was all business now.
“The wedding?” she whispered.
“Yah, of course.” He was brisk. “I need a frau, and you need a husband. Look at you!” He gave her another sharp glance that took in her ample girth.
“Oh, Mose.” She sighed but seemed to miss the point. “Happiness fills my heart so I can hardly speak, but I will talk with my brother in the morning, and yah this can happen soon. Very soon. Oh, the Lord is blessing me and my daughters more than I can ever say! Can I kiss you before you leave? So I can think of your kind words and tender heart in the days ahead?”
Mose smiled. “I suppose so.” He leaned toward her and Bethany took her time. Her face glowed when she finished. “Oh, Bishop, thank you. You don’t know…”
Mose silenced her with a wave of his hand. “Speak no more of it. We have a lifetime in front of us, and you will have your duties as a bishop’s frau. I suggest you begin by showing some restraint with your eating. You must be an example to the other women in all godliness and holiness.”
Bethany’s smile faded. “I will fast until the wedding!” she declared. “I will not disappoint you, Bishop.”
She might or she might not, Mose figured. At the moment her willingness was all he asked for. “I’ll be back soon,” he said over his shoulder.
Bethany didn’t ask when but stood on the porch to wave goodbye. When Mose turned for one last glance, the faces of Bethany’s two girls peered out from her skirts. The road had been long and rough in his travels to his second marriage, Mose told himself, but he had finally found the right woman.
Now there was only Miriam’s letter to write, and the thing would be done.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Dusk had fallen and Miriam was sitting on the couch in the living room with Uncle William and Aunt Fannie seated in their rockers. Jonathon was nestled against her, smiling up into her face. Miriam tried to return the smile, but the effort was feeble. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders instead and pulled him tightly against her. Uncle William glanced at them as he reached for the family Bible and opened it. Without comment he began to read, “Blessed are the undefiled in the way, who walk in the law of the Lord. Blessed are they that keep his testimonies, and that seek him with the whole heart.”
Miriam let her thoughts drift as Uncle William read on. The words didn’t provide as much comfort tonight as they often did. For one, the Scripture talked of a person who had things right in her life. Miriam didn’t. Not anymore. And for another, an unopened letter from Mose was tucked in her dress pocket. Aunt Fannie had handed it to her with a concerned look when she arrived home from school. Miriam hadn’t found the strength to open it yet. No doubt the letter would say more of the same about Mose’s farm life and how successful he was in his ministry. In the meantime she could barely get out of bed in the mornings. The only comfort she had was the kind words so many of the community people had said to her these past Sundays. Had Aunt Fannie shared her problem with the other women? Or perhaps Deacon Phillips’s frau, Katie, had done so.
Katie had been the first to touch her elbow after the church services yesterday and whisper in Miriam’s ear, “Dark clouds always have their silver linings, dear. We all love you, Miriam. Remember that.”
Miriam had been unable to respond properly, other than to squeeze Katie’s hand.
Katie had moved on, but the encouragement didn’t stop. Others had approached her, and the touches and soft whispers were delivered with sincere smiles.
“I know life’s hard sometimes, but we’re praying for you.”
“Just cry out to the Lord, Miriam, and He’ll see you through.”
“Our children so appreciate you. Don’t forget that.”
“We pray for you every night at devotion time, Miriam.”
In spite of their comforts, Miriam felt she was to blame for her situation and needed to straighten out her life. In any event, tomorrow she’d have to answer Mose’s letter. That would take a great effort, but it must be done. What could she say to a man whose life seemed so perfect when your own was such a mess? Had God perhaps forsaken her? This wasn’t the first time the question crossed her mind, and she certainly wouldn’t have blamed the Lord if He had.
Miriam focused again on Uncle William’s words. “Make me to understand the way of thy precepts: so shall I talk of thy wondrous works. My soul melteth for heaviness: strengthen thou me according to thy word.”
Yah, Miriam told herself. That was more like what she felt. Miriam pulled Jonathon even closer until Uncle William finished a few moments later. They all knelt, and Uncle William read the usual evening prayer. His voice rose and fell with the
familiar German words. Miriam let her mind lift heavenward as she prayed her own prayer. “I want to do Your will, Lord. It’s strength that I lack. I know that I have failed both You and Mose, so please forgive me and help me.”
A measure of peace settled over her. Uncle William soon said amen, and they all sat up again, but no one moved to go except Jonathon, who dashed off the couch to play upstairs.
Aunt Fannie finally looked her way to say, “Maybe you should read your letter from Mose now, Miriam. You’ve been under a cloud ever since I gave it to you.”
Miriam took a deep breath. “Yah. I’ll go into the kitchen, but I think I’m okay. The devotions tonight helped a lot.”
Aunt Fannie’s compassionate gaze followed her. Miriam didn’t dare look at her aunt too long lest the tears come. She opened the envelope. The letter wasn’t long, but Miriam still sat down to read.
Dear Miriam,
Greetings in the name of the Lord. I hope this finds you well.
Miriam stopped and stared at the wall. Was Mose changing? He had never begun a letter like this. Miriam blinked the tears away and continued to read.
I have been doing the usual things around the farm. Spring will break soon, I hope. This has been a hard winter for us in Wayne County, and as always one must not complain but be thankful for what the Lord sends.
But to the point of my letter. I received correspondence from Deacon Phillips today, in which he reported that you have not been well in mind or spirit for some time. This, of course, troubles me greatly. Deacon Phillips did not say what the reason was for your ailment, but he did imply that our relationship might not be the best. I’m not sure what that means, but I do have my opinions on what the problem could be.
I wish you had written me yourself about this, but perhaps the shame of your ill health was too much for you to disclose. Deacon Phillips’s letter has brought me many troubled thoughts as you can imagine. We have already been through so much, Miriam. As you know my journey toward you began when I first visited Oklahoma on the advice of your now brother-in-law Glen Weaver. I don’t want to scold Glen because he did what he thought was best. I also know that your daett praised you highly, as did the community in Oklahoma. I wish to leave all that as it is and pray that the Lord will bless them and that you will be granted gut health in the future.
But I think it is best if we break off the engagement, Miriam. With your fragile condition, it might also be better if I offer no explanations. Believe me, I regret this deeply. I had looked forward to having you here in Wayne County as my frau, but sometimes it’s time to admit that a wrong road was taken and to make amends. I will not hold any hard feelings toward you, as I have already moved in the direction the Lord has revealed to me, and I might say, to others of the ministry in our district, and this is how things should be.
So may God bless you, Miriam, as He has blessed me.
Sincerely,
Mose Stoll
Miriam’s hand shook. She stood to her feet and clutched the chair for support. The warmth from the evening’s devotions disappeared into thin air. She was clearly unworthy of a place by Mose’s side as his frau. Mose had finally done what he should have done when she kissed Tyler that first time. Her moral failure had been great, and Mose was right to come to his senses.
Miriam entered the living room with the letter in one hand. Her voice sounded distant, and her ears rang. “I guess I should have let you read it first.” Miriam handed the letter to Aunt Fannie. “I have failed completely.”
Uncle William stood up to read over his frau’s shoulder. Miriam waited with her hand on the couch to steady herself.
A soft smile filled Aunt Fannie’s face when she looked up. “Maybe it’s for the best, Miriam. Things weren’t going well anyway.”
“You’re just being kind,” Miriam whispered.
“Fannie speaks the truth,” Uncle William echoed. “The whole community has been very concerned about this, Miriam. Perhaps this is the Lord’s way. Mose wished you nothing but the best, and I’m sure you feel the same about him.”
Miriam nodded, unable to speak.
“Many of us in the community have been much in prayer about this.” Aunt Fannie reached over to touch Miriam’s arm. “I wrote your mamm about the matter, and she wrote back to say they support whatever happens, and now Mose has made his decision. We must accept this as the Lord’s way.”
“But I’ve…” Miriam stopped. That she was a failure was obvious, and yet no rebuke was written on either Aunt Fannie’s or Uncle William’s faces. They appeared concerned, but there was no scorn. The tenderness from Aunt Fannie’s touch still lingered on her arm. Miriam slid down on the couch, and her aunt came to sit beside her. They clung to each other while Uncle William stood vigil by the rocker.
“Do you feel better now?” Aunt Fannie studied Miriam’s face once she let go.
Miriam didn’t answer. She didn’t know how she felt. Maybe she was a little relieved that she would not see Mose again—at least not anytime soon. No longer would she have to wonder if she met the standard as Mose’s promised frau.
“Come.” Aunt Fannie took Miriam by the arm and led her back into the kitchen. “Sit,” Aunt Fannie said. “I’m going to make you hot chocolate, and we’re going to talk.”
Miriam’s legs wobbled as she sat down at the kitchen table. Aunt Fannie busied herself with the kettle and brought over the bowl of hot chocolate and a bag of marshmallows from the pantry. While the water heated, Aunt Fannie sat down beside Miriam. In a kind voice she began, “This is hard for me to say, Miriam, but I have to confess that I was wrong about Mose. I told you so awhile back, but I want to make myself clear now. I misjudged the man completely. I know he’s a bishop, and some unmarried woman will likely make him the perfect frau, but that’s not you. William and I have spoken at length on the matter, and we have consulted often with Deacon Phillips and Katie about your condition. We are all of the same mind. We knew that at the very least some changes would have to be made in your relationship with Mose. This is what Deacon Phillips said in his letter to Mose, but none of us tried to end the relationship. That was up to Mose and you, and Mose has obviously decided you were too much trouble for him. That was his loss. You’re in no way to blame for any of this.”
Tears stung Miriam’s eyes again, and Aunt Fannie gave her a quick hug. “Don’t cry, dear. I know you looked at this as some sort of endurance test, but marriage is not supposed to be like that. A man and a woman must walk in love with each other and the Lord. Mose wasn’t treating you right, Miriam. And if he doesn’t want to change, it’s best if he ends the relationship as he’s done. Can you believe that, Miriam? Can you hope a little again? All of us want that cheerful, happy Miriam back who used to bless our community so greatly.”
“But what is to become of me?” Miriam whispered. “When I get old, I will always remember this failure. Think of what you’re saying, Aunt Fannie. I could have been a bishop’s frau, but now I’ll be just a withered-up old maid.”
Aunt Fannie laughed. “I don’t think that will happen. For one thing, you can always remember that a bishop once courted you, but he wasn’t gut enough. That’s a much better way to look at this.”
Miriam attempted a smile, but the tears crept down her cheeks instead. “I have to get well somehow, for the sake of my schoolchildren if for no other reason. Will they scorn me when they find this out?”
“No one will scorn you,” Aunt Fannie assured her. “We will feel only joy in our hearts when we see smiles fill your face again.”
“I’ll try,” Miriam muttered.
“Nay,” Aunt Fannie chided. “You don’t have to try anymore. We will help you. All of us will with our prayers and with our thankful hearts. We’re glad, Miriam, that you live among us.”
Miriam hid her face in her hands. “You shouldn’t speak like that.”
Aunt Fannie ignored the protest. “And I want to say this also. Bishop Mullet and the rest of the ministry deeply regret the decision to pl
ace you in the bann. They feel it was done in the heat of the moment when things appeared badly for Tyler’s reputation. But Tyler has come back often since then, and he’s tried to make right what he could. The man’s character has impressed both Bishop Mullet and Deacon Phillips.”
Miriam looked away. “Tyler has nothing to do with this.”
Aunt Fannie ignored the comment to continue. “Did you know that Mose wanted you to be in the bann for another week, but our ministry refused? Of course they all have to work together, so what happened, happened, but I wanted you to know that. You are greatly loved here, Miriam.”
Miriam lifted her face and wept silently.
Aunt Fannie waited a few moments before she spoke again. “Another thing. I’m now free to say that Tyler has asked to court you, Miriam. He has spoken at length with Deacon Phillips, but he was told it was a forbidden subject while you were engaged to Mose. He was also told that no one would interfere, other than to ask that Mose make some changes in his attitude toward you. Tyler seemed to think that would end your relationship with Mose, and apparently he was correct. Tyler has also asked to join the community, Miriam. I know you’re in no condition to respond to that news, but I didn’t want to dribble it out bit by bit in the days ahead or have someone else tell you.”
Miriam choked back the sobs. “I have also failed Tyler, and I’m in no condition to see him again. You should know that.”
Aunt Fannie nodded. “That’s why we’re going to help—William and I, and Deacon Phillips and Katie. You won’t have to walk this road alone this time. I’m not expecting you to say anything tonight, or even anytime soon. You must get well first. Come, the chocolate is ready and we can relax better in the living room.”
“Will you tell Tyler this—what Mose wrote?” Miriam pointed toward the letter now resting on the tabletop.
Miriam and the Stranger Page 27
