by nikki blaire
She soaked for a while longer, then climbed out of the tub to dry off and pull on clothes. She trudged to the kitchen to pour herself some wine then snuggled into her bed. A moment later, the tears she had suppressed began to trickle down her cheek. She lay there, sipping wine and sobbing until she cried herself to sleep.
Hours later, she woke up with a start in the middle of the night to her phone buzzing underneath her. She groggily rolled over to check who was calling. She held the screen up to see Michael’s familiar number, groaned, then clicked ignore. At first, that was enough, but then she remembered the havoc he had caused in her life, so she sent him a scathing text message to never call her again. She needed to purge herself of him and all of the other meaningless men in her life. She copy and pasted the same curt text message to the others then turned her phone to silent mode before drifting back to sleep.
The next morning, she lazily dragged open her eyes just in time to get to work, but suddenly felt extremely exhausted. Clearly, she needed more time at home. Her body was begging her for it, as if the nonstop running had finally caught up to her. She sent a quick text to Renee telling her that she would be out for the week then quickly checked her emails for anything that needed her immediate attention. While she scrolled, she saw a message from Mr. Whitman’s assistant about the project she had proposed to him. Tremaine’s project. She sucked her teeth at the memory then immediately forwarded it to Renee for her to handle. She could barely say his name, let alone type it, or set up a meeting with him. After checking a few more messages, she set her tablet aside and pondered over what she would do today to keep her mind occupied. She hadn’t had this much free time in forever.
“I could draw.” The idea came to her. She hadn’t pulled out a pen and pad to sketch since she started graduate school. Ayda eagerly searched through her room for her old art supplies then laid them out on her kitchen counter. She was like a kid in a candy store while she sat in a stool, sketching away. Her hands seemed to have muscle memory, immediately remembering how to draw the lines. Before long, she was caught up in her art and the day was gone. She finally took a break to eat, while she admired her finished product. She had sketched out a man and woman with intertwined limbs.
“Even my hands know I’m horny.” She laughed to herself, but it really wasn’t funny. She had become so accustomed to being with Tremaine that her body had started to experience some type of withdrawal. She missed him terribly and it had only been a day. Drawing was fun, but she would need something more potent to distract her from the loneliness.
“The only thing that distracting is my mother.” She scoffed, but then a light bulb went off. She still owed her mother a lunch. She sent her a text to see if she was free tomorrow then scheduled for them to meet at the same restaurant as always.
“I hope I don’t regret that.” She shook her head to herself then grabbed her food and wine to finish eating on the balcony. The scenery below reminded her of the night that she and Tremaine had shared their first kiss.
“Dammit. This entire apartment reeks of him.” She growled to herself, while she looked out at the skyline. It was amazing how effortlessly someone who she had just met a few months ago had weaved himself into her everyday life. Now, she was feeling a profound loss without him, but she had to work on herself before seeing him again. If she ever did see him again.
****
Three days.
Tremaine hadn’t heard from Ayda or seen her in three days, but it felt like an eternity. The little things reminded him of her so much, but what threw him off the most was citrus. The tiniest hint of citrus in the air made the hairs on his body stand on end. Unfortunately, that was what surrounded him during this morning meeting. Little cartons of orange juice had been provided along with breakfast and the smell felt like torture. He pushed his own carton further away, hoping to quell the scent, but it was no use. He was surrounded.
He had thought about calling her to apologize, but he was still disappointed. He hadn’t talked to anyone about the fight, even though Trinity had bombarded him with questions as soon as he came back upstairs that day. He had sent her home soon after, but the damage had already been done. Ayda was gone and Tremaine was sure that she wasn’t coming back.
“Tremaine Henley.” A voice called out his name and rattled him. His name had not been on the agenda, so he had assumed that it was safe to daydream. He looked up to see an unfamiliar man standing next to Mr. Bass, motioning towards him.
“Uh, yea. That’s me.” He stood up.
“Tremaine, this is Mr. Ashford. He’s from corporate. He wants to talk with you for a moment, and please feel free to use my office, Mr. Ashford.”
The man nodded in the direction of the door, so Tremaine quickly followed. While they walked, he began to go over everything he had done at work for the past couple of weeks. No one had said he had made a mistake, so he was hoping that he wasn’t in trouble.
“Mr. Henley, right this way.” The man directed him into Mr. Bass’ empty office. He sat in his usual seat across from Mr. Bass’ desk, while Mr. Ashford took Mr. Bass’ chair.
“So, I’m going to get straight to the point. I lead business development for the leasing company.” The man held out his hand for Tremaine to shake.
“Nice to meet you.” He nodded, while trying to hide his surprise. Tremaine had not expected a Black man to lead anything in this company. He had been the only face of color around for so long that he thought he was the only one.
“I’ve been hearing good things about you, Mr. Henley. Very good things.”
“Is that so?” Tremaine stature straightened. This was not what he had been expecting to hear.
The man pulled out a folder and placed it on the desk between the two of them.
“Our department received a call from the public affairs department at Prestige marketing and PR firm to discuss a community engagement project in collaboration with Forde Financials.”
Ayda.
Tremaine groaned to himself. He had forgotten all about the proposal that she had submitted on his idea.
“Imagine my confusion when Prestige mentioned that you are the designated point person on this huge project, but did not work in my department.”
“Yea, that was my bad. I didn—”
The man held his hand up for Tremaine to let him finish.
“So, I had to find you and was even more shocked to find out that you’re working on the property side of things. It’s a waste. For a brother, as young as yourself, to have been able to make this happen...let’s just say I believe you can do so much more with the right resources. So, I made some calls and pulled some strings.”
He pushed the folder towards him.
“I want you in my department as the director of business development for this region. It’s clear you’ve got the right people’s ear in this area. I need that on my team.”
Tremaine stared at the man then down at the folder for a moment before opening it. He glanced over the documents quickly and swallowed hard at the salary listed in the offer letter.
“This is a job in the corporate office.” He responded, still in shock.
“Yes.” Was all the man said with another nod. “So, I’ll give you the time to consider it, but I’ll need a response by—”
“I accept. Where do I sign?”
This was a promotion that he didn’t need to think about. It was his dream. It would change his life. He would finally be a businessman, and it was all because of Ayda. He sighed, wishing that he could call her, but he knew that was a lost cause.
“I like your enthusiasm. I knew I made a good choice.” He passed Tremaine a pen. He quickly signed his name then pushed the folder back towards him. “We’ll give you a few weeks to close out things here, but would like for you to start working on this project immediately. It’s your brainchild, so I’d like you to see it through. There’s a strategy meeting at Prestige next week. That was the earliest availability for all parties involved.”
&nbs
p; Tremaine coughed. Continuing to work on this project meant he would have to work with Ayda. Despite his hesitation, he would not back out. At least seeing her again would allow him to thank her.
“Sure, alright. I’ll jump right in.” He forced a grin then shook the man’s hand again.
“Oh, and I just have one more question.” Tremaine asked.
“Would I have to move out of my apartment? My living here was contingent on my working in this building.”
“Oh, yes. Well, you’re welcome to stay here if you’d like, but most of our corporate office folks who live on our properties live in The Grand’s building.”
Tremaine held back his laughter at the irony. He stood up, thanked the man again, then dismissed himself. As soon as he was back in his office, he called Davin. He could finally offer his friend his apartment.
“What’s good?” Davin picked up shortly after he dialed. “You calling to tell me you’re proposing?”
Under normal circumstances, Tremaine wouldn’t be so bothered by Davin’s joke, but today it stung.
“Naw, nothing like that.” He cleared his throat. “I was just wanting to let you know that my apartment is yours, if you still want it.”
“Hell yeah I want it. Damn, that’s so perfect. I was just thinking that I was going to have to rent a room until I found something good. This is great man, thanks.”
“No problem, bruh. That’s what frat brothers are for. I can be out whenever you need it, so just let me know.”
“You’ve got time. I won’t be moving out there for work for a couple of weeks, not until after Memorial Day. So take your time. Just don’t take too long.” He laughed.
“So, why the move? You and ol’ girl decided to shack up?”
Another comment that felt like a stab to his chest. Tremaine flinched then sighed before answering him.
“Naw. I got a promotion to the corporate office, actually, so I’m gonna move to the nicer building. It’s closer to Sasha’s school.”
“Wait a minute, isn’t that your girl’s building too? That’s convenient.” Davin chuckled. Tremaine thought a moment before correcting him, but the words came out before he could check himself.
“We broke up.”
The words tasted terribly in his mouth.
“Whoa. Y’all barely even got started. What happened? You good, bruh?”
“Actually, naw. I’m not.” Tremaine sat down in his office’s chair. He hadn’t planned to spill his guts, but he had started, so he may as well finish. He told Davin everything, starting from the night at the club, to Trinity showing up at his doorstep, to Ayda swerving out of his parking lot.
“I told you to take things slow, man.” Davin sighed once Tremaine finished.
“This isn’t an I told you so kinda time, frat.”
“You’re right. My bad. Don’t get too upset about it though. This shit is easily fixable. I thought something way worse had happened from how you sound, bruh. This is just miscommunication. All you gotta do is go to her, talk to her, and y’all hear each other out.”
“We tried to talk before though.” Tremaine interjected.
“Naw, y’all were both tryna prove your points before. You gotta chill out and listen to each other. And you gotta stop trippin.”
“Me trippin? How the hell am I in the wrong? She—”
“I know what she did. You told me, but c’mon bruh, really? How many times have we been out somewhere and an old chick comes up just to start mess with the new chick? It happens and we both know there’s nothing you can do about it. She could’ve said something more, yea, maybe. But you shouldn’t take it so seriously. I mean, do you really think she was messing around with dude still?”
Tremaine exhaled. He knew that Ayda wasn’t seeing anyone but him. He kept her fully occupied. If he wasn’t with her, they were on the phone, or texting. Every part of her was his.
“Your silence let’s me know all I need to know.” Davin retorted.
“You let some insecurity shit make you feel some kinda way, which happens, but you trippin. And from what you told me, her family has a name that matters. She can’t be with the dude who’s throwing punches. We’re adults now. We ain’t on the yard anymore. Tell the girl you’re sorry and move on. And you know you should’ve told her about Trinity already.”
“So, she has no fault in all of this? Not at all?”
“I didn’t say that. I get what you were upset about, but is it enough for you not to talk to her and get it straightened out? Especially, since you’re out here sick as hell. Plus, you’re moving to her building. You can’t avoid it.”
“Dammit. You’re right though.” He rubbed the back of his neck then told Davin thanks for the advice before hanging up. He sat there in silence for a moment then opened up a text message to Ayda. He typed the words “Can we talk?” then stared at the screen for a minute before, ultimately, deciding to delete it.
Ayda had come to his apartment to try and talk things through, so she deserved a face-to-face conversation as well. He just needed to get a good plan together because he knew that this wouldn’t be easy. Nothing about Ayda was easy, but he was finding that nothing worth having in life ever was.
Chapter Seventeen
“So, Mr. Henley, will this apartment be to your liking?”
The same building manager who had once given Tremaine an orientation was now showing him a luxurious three bedroom, two bathroom apartment in the very same building. Tremaine stood on the balcony overlooking the city. It was the same view that he had looked at while he stood on Ayda’s balcony just one floor up from this apartment.
“Mr. Henley.” The man repeated, bringing him back to the present.
“Uh, yea and I keep telling you to call me Tremaine. We’re still colleagues. Me moving to corporate doesn’t change anything.”
Ayda calling him Mr. Henley had made him feel important. Now, hearing it from someone else, just made him feel detached.
“Well then, if it’s to your liking, we can get everything signed. I’ve got the lease right here. I’ll have the cleaning crew come through and get everything in tip top shape for you.”
“Thanks, man.” Tremaine shook his hand then signed all of his paperwork.
“You’ve got a new apartment. Here are your keys, two sets, and a mail key, key fob, and a parking pass.”
Tremaine took the folder that he held out to him then asked to have a moment in the apartment alone. Once the door closed, he did a slow walk through the place trying to imagine how he would set things up, but his mind kept going back to Ayda. It would be impossible to live here without seeing her, thinking of her. It had already been a hassle to make it to this appointment without running into her.
And I’ve gotta work with her.
He exhaled. Some months ago, he had only been dreaming about her. Now, she was so effortlessly weaved into his life that he couldn’t escape her. He knew that he had to talk to her before their meeting, but he wanted to do more than that. He had to set everything straight and make it clear to her that he wanted to try and make something great with her. He looked down at the folder, his eyes landing on the set of keys, triggering Ayda’s voice in his mind.
I’ll give you a key to my apartment when you give me a key to yours.
He remembered, smiled, and figured that the idea that came to him was worth a shot. She said she hadn’t known where they stood, but giving her a key would most definitely show her how serious he was about fixing things between them. He left the apartment, locked the door, and then took the elevator down to the lobby. He had intentionally chosen a time where he thought Ayda wouldn’t be home, not wanting to see her before he had his apology planned. He didn’t want to risk another argument, which was still a possibility as his emotions were still running high. He slipped out of the back exit then got to his car. Once inside, he felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. Part of him hoped that it was Ayda, but he knew that she wouldn’t call. She was too prideful to approach him with an apology
twice.
“Hey, Ma.” He picked up after seeing his mother’s name on the screen. “What’s up?”
“Tremaine, baby! Julissa told me about your promotion! I’m so proud of you. Wish you would’ve told me yourself, but I know how you keep things from me.”
“I’m not keeping things from you, Ma. I just know that Julissa’s gonna tell you everything, so why take the time.” He shook his head. He had just text Julissa and Quentin about his promotion the night before, and his mother was already calling him. Julissa didn’t waste any time.
“I guess, but I’d rather hear things from you. You’re my baby boy, and I find out second hand that you’re getting a promotion, you’re moving, and you’ve got a girlfriend.”
Girlfriend.
The word sounded off like an alarm in the back of his mind. Ayda wasn’t even talking to him right now, the furthest thing from being his girlfriend.
“Girlfriend, Ma, what did JuJu tell you? I was seeing somebody, but,” He tried to clarify, but he knew his mother wouldn’t hear it. She had gotten ahold of the word “girlfriend” and she wasn’t going to let it go.
“We were thinking of coming up to celebrate during the holiday. Memorial Day is in a few weeks. We can do a cookout and just celebrate my baby and I can meet this girl since she’s been around my grand.”
Tremaine sighed and let his head fall onto the steering wheel.
“I’ll have to get you a hotel when you guys come up.” That was all he could commit to without lying to his mother. “My apartment will be a mess once we start packing.”
“Fine, fine, but nothing fancy. I know you’ve got all that money now, but there’s no need to waste it. There are still people less fortunate than you.”
“Sure, Ma. Nothing fancy. Aight, I gotta go. Love you.” He said goodbye then hung up. He tapped his head on the steering wheel one more time out of frustration then finally turned the key in the ignition. Now, he felt additional pressure for his apology to Ayda to go well. His heart sank in defeat for a moment, but he refused to let himself wallow. He would try his best with Ayda and if it didn’t work then he would just have to tell his mother the truth.
