by Jayne Blue
I shifted my weight, pulling Beth on top of me. I wanted her to ride me. I wanted to watch her move. She pulled her t-shirt over her head and threw it against the wall. Braless, her breasts hung heavy. I reached up and kissed each nipple, rolling it gently with my tongue. I loved the little noises she made as she picked up her own rhythm, grinding against me. I wanted her to take her pleasure first. I could feel her sex throb against me.
Beth fucked me with abandon. I knew she felt what I did. She was scared. So was I. I couldn’t make her promises I knew she needed. I could only offer her this. Here. Now. And she took it.
When Beth came, she threw her head back, arching her dark hair over her shoulders. I laced my fingers through hers and kept her upright. I pressed my hips into her, filling her as far as my dick would go.
“Danny!” She screamed my name as her orgasm ripped through her. She was wet and wild, gushing all around me. It drove me to the edge. I never wanted this feeling to stop. I knew in my heart it would have to last us both. Maybe forever.
As her legs quivered, I got my hands on her hips and rose off the floor. Rock hard, I stayed inside of her as I got to my feet and carried her into the bedroom. Her hair brushed my shoulders, light as a feather. I lay Beth gently on the bed.
“I want to look at you,” I said, my voice thick with lust. Beth squirmed, still feeling her afterglow.
God, she was gorgeous. She trembled, parting her legs. Her nipples peaked as I ran my hands down her smooth, silky thighs. I primed myself, ready to lose myself in her all over again. She let me. Beth reached up and guided me into her. I went deep. Her juices coated me. Beth. My sweet Beth. I went up on the balls of my feet, sheathing myself to the root.
Then I took her. Claimed her. Made her mine forever. Beth clutched the sheets as I picked up the pace. I could feel her rising again. She met me thrust for thrust.
“Baby,” I whispered. Then I lost myself. My seed poured out of me. Beth took it all. I came fast and hard. She cried out my name. First Danny, then Deacon. She took me. I made her mine.
Then I gathered her against me and held on tight. Beth sighed against my chest and threw one leg over my hip. We were sticky with each other. Beads of sweat poured down her temple. I wanted more. I wanted it all.
I peppered Beth with soft kisses, moving down the column of her throat. Time stopped. It had to. Because when the sun rose, I knew everything might change forever. I heard my phone ringing in my jeans in the kitchen. I knew I should answer it. It was Bear. It was the club. But for these few precious moments, I shut it all out and lived only for Beth.
Chapter 18
Beth
I felt warm and safe in Danny’s arms. As the morning sun stabbed through the curtains, I realized it had been years since I’d felt this way. Or maybe I’d never really felt this way. Sean had been a means of escape from the turmoil of my home life. Eighteen seemed like a lifetime ago. But I went from one war zone to the next.
“I love you,” Danny said, turning to his hip to look at me. He brought my fingers to his lips. Warmth flared through me. I wanted him again. This man set off a firestorm inside of me. I craved him like a drug.
Reaching up, I smoothed the hair away from his brow. “I love you too.”
He blinked hard, as if bracing for my words. How could he have even doubted what I’d say? “I’m sorry for this,” he said. “I’m sorry I couldn’t come to you without all this ... baggage. You deserve something else. You deserve peace.”
I took a deep breath. “I’ve had peace, I think. For the last ten years anyway. I’m not saying it’s been perfect. I’ve kept everyone here at arm’s length. Sean’s demons are a hard thing to shake.”
The moment I said it, I wished I could take it back. No part of Sean belonged here right now. He’d been the thing between us for far too long.
“I never told him,” Danny said. “But I think he knew. I think he always knew. The trouble was, he knew the both of us way too well.”
So there it was. An answer to a question I’d never let myself ask. “Danny,” I said. “It was over between us. It had been over for a really long time. He knew it. I’d already asked him for a divorce before you and I ... ever …”
He leaned in and quieted me with a kiss. “Sean lost any claim he had over you the first time he hit you, Beth.”
I couldn’t breathe. Hot tears stung my eyes. I had never come out and told Danny the details of the darkest part of my relationship with Sean. But he knew. Of course he knew.
“That doesn’t absolve me from blame,” he said. “But I’m done carrying the guilt of things that happened in the past. I made my choice. I can’t regret any of them. The one thing I do regret is now. I came here to set you free and instead I’ve caught you up in another shit storm.”
I ran my fingers over the hard planes of his stomach. My Danny. My Deacon. He was rough and beautiful, carved in granite. I was starting to get to know the new lines of his body, the scars, the ink. I ached for him. It came as natural as breathing. I curved my fingers gently around his cock and brought him to me. He groaned with pleasure and a wicked smile lit his face.
Our coupling had been hurried and desperate last night. Now I wanted something different. I needed him. He needed me. Danny put his hands on my hips and guided me on top of him. He was hard and ready. I was wet and throbbing for him. It shocked me how attuned my body was to his. It was as if I were built for him. Just one look or the simplest touch and he had me spinning with desire.
I took him deep, relishing how full he made me feel. I rocked slow, savoring every inch of him. Deacon’s eyes flashed with lust as he watched me. He reached for me, running the pads of his thumbs over my aching nipples. Those were primed for him too. I threw my head back and sighed.
We’d put so many things between us over the years. Sadness. Guilt. Oaths we both broke. But through it all, one thing stayed sacred. It was here in the silence between us as our bodies joined. It had taken me so long to understand it, but when I was with him like this, I knew we belonged.
I came slow and hard. Danny held me up, lacing his fingers through mine. As I crested down, he pulled me to him. He kissed me once then turned me, getting me up on all fours. New heat flared through me as he entered me from behind, driving even deeper than before. He leaned forward as he came, brushing his lips against the back of my neck. His strong thrusts opened me. Then he found his release.
Later, we slept through the brightest part of the morning, feeling content in each other’s arms. When I woke, the space beside the bed was empty. A little flare of panic went through me as I gathered the sheets around me and looked for him.
I found Danny in the kitchen, stirring eggs in a skillet. My heart soared. He looked up and read the expression on my face.
“I thought …”
He smiled. “You thought I’d leave?”
I sank into one of the kitchen chairs. I’d thrown on one of the t-shirts Danny left here the other day. It hung to my knees and I loved wrapping myself in his scent. I rested my chin in my palm.
“I didn’t know what to think after last night.” Danny expertly flipped the eggs. He turned down the heat then slid them out of the pan onto two plates. My stomach growled as he set one in front of me and handed me a fork.
“I was going to serve you breakfast in bed.”
“Mmm. It’s a little late for that, isn’t it?”
Danny slid into the chair opposite me. His expression darkened. My heart sank. I knew this was coming. We’d let ourselves exist in a bubble last night. But we couldn’t forever.
“Do I get to ask you what happens next?” I said.
Danny reached for me. No, he was all Deacon now. He put a hand over mine. “Things might get worse before they get better. And I’m not going to sit around and let you put yourself at risk. I’ve done that enough.”
“I’m not some eighteen-year-old girl anymore, Danny. I’m not even twenty-one. I can make my own choices.”
He raised a brow. “
I know that. But I won’t let my choices wreck your life anymore. Nobody knows I’m here. At least, they weren’t supposed to. And yet, Milo Higgins broke into your fucking house, Beth. He knows about you.”
“Do you think he followed you here one of the other times you came?”
Danny sat straighter. “No. I’ve gone over that in my head a hundred times. But ... no. I wasn’t followed.”
“Well, you did draw attention. Crystal Falls is your stereotypical small town, Danny. People knew you came to see me.”
His eyes narrowed. “Did someone approach you about it?”
“You mean other than Darlene and Ed? Danny, the town sheriff knows you were here. He warned me to steer clear.”
Danny clenched his fist. The hard look in his eyes startled me. “Sheriff? Tell me his name.”
“What, you think he’s working with the Devils Hawks? Why? I mean, what could he possibly have to gain by that?”
He rose and grabbed his leather cut from the back of the chair. More than anything, I wanted to coax him back into bed with me. We were heading for something I didn’t want to face.
“Beckett Finch,” I said with a sigh. It would do no good to keep that little piece of intel from Danny. A quick internet search would have given him the same information.
“Finch,” he said. “Yeah. I’ve heard of him. He’s not a Crystal Falls native.”
“No, I don’t think so. What are you going to do?” Suddenly, that hard look in Deacon’s eyes made my blood run cold. I wasn’t naive. I’d trusted plenty of people in my life that I shouldn’t have. And yet, every instinct in me told me I had nothing to fear from Sheriff Finch.
“I don’t like this,” he said. “Beth, I don’t want you talking to him. I don’t want you talking to anyone.”
“What am I supposed to do, barricade myself in this house? It won’t help. I told you, if it’s the Hawks you’re worried about, they already know I live here.”
He pounded his fist against the counter. “You can’t stay here. Beth, I need to get you someplace safe.”
“And we’ve been over this. I’m not running again. At least ... I’m not running alone.”
I hadn’t planned it. The words tumbled out of my mouth without my thinking. But once I started, the desire burned through me so strong I could barely stand. “Deacon, come with me. I’ll go anywhere you want, as long as you come too.”
It was as if my entire life had been leading up to this one moment. Danny and me in the middle of my kitchen. His pale blue eyes cut through me. A tiny vein throbbed in his temple as he considered my words.
I went to him, sliding my hands up his chest. “Danny, let’s go. If I’m not safe here, then take me someplace else. Someplace we can both be safe. I don’t know for sure if Finch is feeding information to the Hawks. My gut tells me he’s not. But it doesn’t matter. What he told me is true. You can’t deny it. This club war won’t end without bloodshed on both sides. It’ll tear up Port Azrael. You’ve given enough, haven’t you? Ten years. So let’s go. Let’s not be anywhere near it when the shit hits the fan. You told me you loved me. I’ve always loved you. Don’t we both deserve a fresh start and a chance to be happy?”
The color drained from his face and fresh pain lit his eyes. I could see the conflict swirling behind them. For the first time in my life, there was none in me. I belonged with this man. I belonged to this man. But I would not stand by and watch him get hurt.
“Beth …”
“It’s simple. I know you’re going to tell me you swore an oath to that club. Well, haven’t you sworn one to me? You promised me ten years ago that if I trusted you, if I went away and started over, I’d be safe. Am I? Am I still safe here?”
His nostrils flared. I cut him to the quick. I hated myself a little for it, but if it meant I could protect him from himself, then it would be worth it. God help me, I went in for the kill.
“You’ve broken oaths before. For me. I’m asking you to do it again. For us.”
He gripped my shoulders. Eyes darting over me, I watched him split in two. “Beth, you can’t ask me this.”
“I am asking. Dammit, Danny. I’m asking. I’m begging. We’ll do it together. A fresh start. We’ll be together. We’ll go somewhere the club can’t touch either of us. Don’t make me lose you too. You owe me this.”
He did. Even though I knew it wasn’t fair of me to ask. I loved him though. And it was tearing us both apart.
“Beth, don’t. You can’t make me choose. These men, this club, it’s who I am.”
“But I loved you before all of it, Danny. You were mine.”
His face fell. “I know. I’m sorry. I wish I could make things different.”
“You can. We both can. Don’t you see? We’ll go to California. Alaska. Europe. I don’t care.”
He drew me to him. The solid warmth of his chest made me feel safe, even as I knew he’d break my heart.
“I cannot leave the club. Not now. I have to see this through. If I turned my back on them, I wouldn’t be the man you say you love.”
I tore away from him. “But you’d be alive!” Rage thundered through me. It was driven by fear but I couldn’t help it. If I closed my eyes, all I could see was Danny dead.
“It wouldn’t be a life I want.”
“What if I asked you to choose?” I hated the choked sound my voice made. I hated everything about this.
Deacon Wade stood before me, his fists curled at his sides. A muscle in his jaw jumped. His eyes told me everything I needed to know, but he said the words anyway. “Are you?”
“I don’t know.”
“Because I can’t. I do love you. God, I’ve burned for you. I will until the day I die. But I belong to the club as much as I belong to you. I thought I had a calling once, to the church. It wasn’t real. It took me years to figure that out. But the club is my true calling. These men are my brothers now.”
Tears flowed down my cheeks. I let out a bitter laugh. “I’ve had my fill of your brothers, Danny. All they ever seem to do is hurt me and tear you away.”
He came to me. I let him fold me in his arms. “I’m sorry. But there will be an end to this.”
I shook my head. “No, there won’t. As long as you’re a Dark Saint, it’ll never truly be over. God, it was easier when you were just going to be a priest.”
I don’t know how long he held me like that. Forever. Not long enough. Then his cell phone vibrated in his back pocket and the world broke back in.
“I have to go,” he said. “I’m sorry for this.”
Sniffling, I smiled. “No, you’re not. If you were sorry, you wouldn’t leave.”
He smiled back. It was no use. He was right about everything. There was no separating the man I loved from the patch he wore. It’s who he was. I just didn’t know how much of my heart I was willing to risk this time.
He kissed me one last time then walked out of my life all over again.
Chapter 19
Deacon
I could feel Beth’s heart breaking as I rode away. Because mine was breaking too. She deserved better. She deserved a life where she didn’t have to look over her shoulder every minute. I’d blamed my brother for hurting her and letting his world touch her. Now I’d done the same damn thing.
Milo Higgins. I would kill him when I had the chance. He’d touched Beth. He’d been in her fucking house! My fingers trembled around my handlebars and I wished I had them wrapped around Milo’s skinny neck.
I don’t know how fast I rode, but I made Port Az in record time. The lot was almost empty. Rufus didn’t come tearing around the side. Mama Bear’s car was gone too. It meant Bear had probably sent her away long term. He would have had to damn near knock her over the head to get her to go. It meant he thought shit was grave. I just hoped with the dust-up at Woody’s they’d leave Beth out of it for now. It was one of the many things I had to run by Bear.
He was waiting for me in his office. His eyes blazed with anger as I shut the door behind me.
“You answer your fucking phone, Deacon!” he yelled. “Goddammit.”
I stood before him. There was no use making a single excuse. He was right to tear my head off. “I know,” I said. “I’m sorry. I had to make sure Beth was okay. Some shit happened.”
Bear leaned far back in his chair. The fury in his eyes hadn’t lessened, but at least he didn’t look like he was about to throw a punch at me. I’d take that as progress. “Well?”
“Somebody got to her,” I said. “Milo Higgins paid her a visit a couple of nights ago.”
“Shit,” Bear said, he popped his feet off his desk. “Did he hurt her?”
“No. She didn’t even tell me about it until last night. He showed up in his cut. Made damn sure she knew who he was. So Beth figured it was all about trying to scare her and stir me up.”
Bear raised a brow. “Smart girl. She’s probably right.”
“Yeah, well, I still don’t like it. How the hell does Milo Higgins or any member of the Hawks know a damn thing about Beth? How do they know where she lives?”
There was movement behind me. E.Z. let himself into the office. Bear nodded to him and he took a seat in front of Bear’s desk.
“Who else knew where she was?” I asked. “I mean, I didn’t even know until you told me last month.”
“You sure you didn’t get followed?” E.Z. asked, his tone dripping with contempt.
“I’m sure,” I said. “I know what I’m doing. You think I’d put her in danger intentionally?”
Bear flapped his hand. “Crystal Falls is a small-ass town. All it would take is one person to see you talking to her before the entire population knows her business.”
“She said the sheriff out there, a guy named Finch, confronted her about it. She didn’t seem to think he’s connected to the Hawks, but who knows. I just don’t like it. It needs to be dealt with. By me.”
