by Ryan Michele
“Cars. I rebuild engines.” I grin and shake my head. No girly shit for my woman. Bet you anything this baby knows how to change oil and how to take apart an engine by the time he or she is three.
“I’d take a break from being in the garage. The toxic chemicals and smells aren’t good for you.” Angel’s hand tenses in mine. “Rest is always important; lots of water and sleep. Make sure you get a lot of sleep. Also, spotting is normal. If you happen to have small drops of blood in your underwear, sit down and rest. If there are more than just small drops of blood, call me immediately. A small amount is perfectly normal as the embryo is making its home in your uterus.” Is it bad that I want to fucking gag with all this blood and uterus talk? “Depending on what the blood work says, I won’t see you again for another month, but if you have any questions at all, you call,” the doctor finishes.
“Can I work in the office at the garage?” Angel asks the doctor.
“It would depend on how close it is to the chemicals and fumes. If they are on opposite sides of a building, there should be no problem.” Thank fucking God it’s set up that way. Angel would go nuts sitting around the damn house doing nothing.
“Alright.” The tension in Angel’s grip lessens with the doctor’s words. Bottom line of this visit is we can’t stop a miscarriage; we just have to follow instructions and hope that it all turns out. Not having control of it eats me alive, but I will not show Angel that.
“Thank you, Doctor,” Angel says.
“Do you have any more questions for me?” the doctor asks, moving her papers around on the counter.
“When can we see the baby?” I pipe in. That’s the one thing I wish I could have done before, had just one look at Mia. I know Casey has a couple of pictures, but I would have liked to have seen it with my own eyes.
“At about twelve weeks we will do an ultrasound.” The doctor scratches something down on the folder in front of her.
“When will I be out of the woods for the risk of a miscarriage?” Angel squeezes my hand and I hold hers tight.
The doctor turns to us. “Most happen within the first three months or first trimester. Normally, when we pass that mark I don’t suspect it anymore, but there is always a possibility. I wish I could say it will not happen, but there is always that risk. We will keep a good eye on you and the baby to make sure it is growing healthily.”
Casey’s body sags as all the air comes rushing out in a huge bubble. I’m not sure if it’s relief or defeat. I’m hoping for the first. “I’ll do everything you say, Doctor.” My Angel is a wonderful woman.
“I have no doubt. You will need to take this.” She hands Angel a piece of paper and she nods. “Prenatal vitamins, daily. You are welcome to resume normal everyday activities, minus working on engines, and live your life.”
“Thank you.” Angel smiles.
“All right. I’ll let you get dressed and we’ll be calling you later today,” Doctor Hernandez says, and I remember something.
“Wait!” I stop her as she turns to the door. Her body jolts at my commanding words, but she instantly turns back. “Sex and riding a bike. What about sex? And can she ride on the back of my bike?”
“What about it?” The doctor smiles. “I’m kidding. You can maintain all your normal sexual intercourse. There is no reason for concern.” Relief. There is no fucking way I can go without fucking my girl. “As far as riding, it shouldn’t be a problem, but remember there is less around her to protect her and the baby in case of a fall.” I look up at her with wide eyes. “I’m not saying you have to refrain, just giving you the facts for you to make your decision.”
Fuck me. No more bike for Angel for a while. “Thanks,” I mumble as the doctor leaves the room with the same smile in place as when she stepped in. Casey quickly dresses then pulls her body up to mine.
“You’re gonna be a daddy.” She grins, gripping my shirt in her hands, joy swimming in her eyes. That’s what I like to see.
“And you a mom. Love you, Angel.” My lips sweep hers in a chaste kiss. “Let’s get the hell out of here.”
The day dragged on as we waited for Casey’s phone to ring. She paced the floor back and forth; she barely ate a bite of food. Doctor is right, I’m going to have to help her chill the fuck out. Good thing I have a sister and mom to help me with that shit.
The phone buzzes in Casey’s pocket and she answers it fast. I listen to the one-sided conversation, but don’t get much info from it. She hits end and comes up to me full of smiles.
“Baby is doing great. All the hormone levels are exactly where they should be for a six-week-old baby. He or she will be here in about eight months.” She jumps a bit, letting her excitement show, and I am grateful. “The nurse said that everything in my blood came back normal and there is no reason for any concerns.”
I wrap my arms around her body and slightly lift her up off the floor, her hands gripping my shoulders. I kiss her with all my excitement pouring into it. Damn, this is great news.
Casey pulls away. “I want to wait to tell people until after my next appointment. They want to see me in two weeks, just to get another blood sample to check my levels to make sure. The nurse said it would help alleviate some of the unknown and might help me with the stress.” Her words are like a punch to the gut.
“We have to tell our family, babe. They’ll be happy for us.” I set her down on her feet, but still keep her locked in my arms as I stare into her eyes. This is not something that I want to keep from my family or my brothers.
“I know they will and they will suffer with us if something happens. I just want to make sure. Can you do that for me?” Her eyes plead and as much as I don’t fucking want to, I cave. Fucking hell.
“Fine. But after that appointment, we tell my parents and then announce it to the club.” Fuck me. Ma will have a shit fit if she finds out we didn’t tell her.
She hugs me tight, her body relaxed. “Thank you, baby. I love you so much.”
This is definitely going to be one hell of a wild ride.
Waiting for the next appointment seemed like the longest two weeks of my life. The actual visit was fast as they only took my blood and scooted me along the way. Getting the call that all of my hormone levels were exactly where they should be and everything else was on target was a huge relief. GT already called Ma, Harlow, and Becs to invite them over for dinner. I’ve been cooking for the past hour and trying to make everything great. Last time, I didn’t have an opportunity to tell anyone, so this is a first for me, and I’m pretty excited about it.
When I asked Ma about working in the office with her for a while, she got a really funny look on her face like she knew. I’ve been a bit hesitant around her, wondering when she was going to ask me, but she never has. And I’m grateful for that.
The doorbell rings and I place my towel on the counter. Excitement bubbles and I know I am ready to tell them all. I still have a huge part of me that is terrified, but I’m going to enjoy this moment. I need this moment. I walk into the living room to say hi, giving hugs as everyone files into the house.
Pops, Ma, Becs, Cruz, and Harlow enter the house, Harlow watching me weirdly. I try not to meet her eyes. She’ll pull me aside and beat it out of me if I don’t tell her. She’ll know. She always knows.
“Aunt Casey… Uncie GT.” Little Cooper barrels through the door and I kneel down to the floor as he runs into my arms. My hands move to his stomach, tickling him relentlessly. His laugh is infectious and I love every second of it.
“Hey, bub. How have ya been?” I ask, stopping to let him catch his breath for a moment, his dark hair covering his face from the tussle.
“I pay cars and trucks. Mommy take me to da park and Daddy let me help clean the bike.” I wasn’t expecting a rundown of his day, but so be it.
“Sounds fun.” He giggles and runs for GT’s leg, squeezing it tight. I watch their interaction and tears form in the back of my eyes. GT picks Cooper up and tosses him around in the air, making him full-out l
augh. Beautiful.
GT sets Coop down and he runs off into the house. GT pulls me up to his side, a huge smile gracing his sexy face, and I can see the pride pouring out of his eyes.
“We have something to tell ya.” He looks down at me, his eyes glowing as he addresses the small group. “We’re having a baby.”
Low and Ma scream, then Ma runs up and clutches me to her body. She holds me so tight, air is less available, but the large smile spreading across my lips never diminishes.
“I just knew it!” she screams and I smile. “Oh, Angel, I’m so happy for you. Anything you need, anything at all, you let me know. You hear?” I nod my head, loving the compassion and warmth from the only mother figure I’ve ever known. She pulls away and I’m bombarded with hugs and kisses. GT gets slaps on the back and praise.
Becs strides up and wraps his arms around me, and for a brief moment, I envision my father, but snap out of it. “Baby girl, anything you need, I’m here for you.”
I pull back and look into Becs’s eyes that are swimming with love. “Love you,” I whisper and he smiles.
“Back at ya, kid.” Tears well in my eyes, but I hold them back.
Harlow comes next, smile beaming, and hugs me tight. “Anything. I’m here. I don’t give a shit what happens. I’m here for you no matter what.”
I choke back more tears. This is what I needed before and I have no one to blame but myself for not telling them about Mia sooner.
“Same goes for you,” I whisper softly.
“How did you tell him?” Princess asks, pulling away.
“Oh, I gotta hear this.” Ma comes up behind me, anticipation written all over her face.
“I wrote ‘Hi Daddy’ on my belly for Valentine’s Day.”
“Holy shit! You knew then and didn’t tell me!” Harlow clips and I roll my eyes.
“Then I laid her down and fucked the shit out of her!” GT calls from across the room, and laughter erupts from the guys.
“GT!” I chastise. Seriously. Does he not have a filter when others are around?
“What, babe, I speak the truth.” His grin is so wide that it’s hard to be mad at the man. I love seeing him this happy.
Cooper bursts into the room. “Why you skeeming?” He doesn’t ask anyone in particular, just the group.
Harlow bends down low. I love seeing how much she’s taken on the mom role with Coop. “Buddy, Casey and GT are gonna have a baby.”
“Can I play wit him?” Harlow smiles.
“When the baby gets a little bigger.” Every time I see Harlow with Cooper my heart warms.
He turns and looks up at me. “Aunt Casey, you need toys.” And just like that, his curiosity is over and he takes back off through the house. He is very right, though, we need a lot for the baby.
“We need to have a party!” Ma’s enthusiastic voice cuts through the laughter.
No. No. No. No. It’s too early for everyone in the club to know. I can’t. I just can’t.
“Can we wait until next month?” Ma stills, but listens to me as I talk. “Then I’ll be around three months and I’ll feel more comfortable.” My melancholy silences the room and I didn’t want that, but couldn’t stop myself.
“Oh, baby. Of course.” Ma’s gentle tone warms my heart. GT puts his arm around his mom, pulling her to his body. I release a deep breath that I didn’t know I was holding.
“Let’s eat!” GT roars and then we do just that.
The night is beautiful and so is the happiness surrounding us.
“You want me to do what?” Harlow screeches, putting a huge smile on my face. I love messing with her, but this time I actually mean it.
“Yoga. Doctor says it will help with my stress.” The last two weeks have been a whirlwind, my emotions sometimes keeping me up at night. I swear my body is one ball of live wires and at any given moment one can snap or surge making me crazy. It’s like being ten weeks pregnant has short circuited my brain.
“And you feel the need for me to do this, for what? I’m not stressed.” She grunts, looking at me like I’m nuts and I probably am. I don’t think this shit will work, but I told the doctor I’d do what she said, so I’m doing it. I refuse to be a quitter.
“Because you love me and you want to help me.” I bat my lashes at her in that cute please kind of way. I swear for a second I can see her left hook coming at me, but it is only a brief jolt. She’d never really hit me.
“You are so fucking lucky I do,” she grumbles. I try to hold back the laugh that wants to escape and barely manage.
I smile. “Come on. You can change into my clothes. I got one of those videos from Target so we can do it in the living room.”
“I sure as shit ain’t doing it in front of anyone.” Harlow changes quickly into a pair of workout capris and a tank. I pop the video in and watch as three very skinny women stand on these mat things, which I don’t have. Hopefully the floor will be all right.
I move the coffee table out of the way, making enough room for the both of us. The narrator of the video comes on and he speaks with a Middle Eastern accent. He tells us to lie on our backs and spread our legs out in front of us. Harlow looks at me as if she wants to kill me, but does as the video says.
This supposedly is to stretch my spine, but all I’m doing is lying down with my feet out. Seriously? He tells us to breathe in and out, placing our hands on our stomach. I’m still not buying it and the tension pulsating off Harlow is so thick it’s tangible.
We follow the man’s instructions, slowly pulling our legs up one at a time. His voice is so calming that I begin to feel the tension leave my body with each maneuver. We move our legs from side-to-side one at a time. He has us stand up and Harlow eyes me out of the corner of her eye, but she’s still doing it.
We lift our shoulders up and down, his voice telling us to breathe and feel each movement of our bodies. I allow my mind to focus only on the task and ignore Harlow, and surprisingly, the tension coming off of her has lessened quite a bit.
When we are told to sit back down, I actually welcome it. We stretch our bodies this way and that, nothing strenuous, but there is a slight burn in my muscles. He next instructs us to lie on our stomachs and place our hands behind our backs, grabbing our feet from behind.
Harlow’s head turns toward mine. Her laugh is utterly contagious as I follow her and fall to the floor. What in the hell is this move. This is the pretzel shit I was talking about with the doctor.
“That wasn’t that bad,” I say as I turn off the video; it was definitely enough for one day.
“It wasn’t. I thought we’d have to wind ourselves together, not just stretch. I can handle that.” Princess looks utterly relieved that it’s over.
I laugh. “This is for beginners. I’m sure they do after a while. I just wanted to see what it was about.”
“How do you feel?” Concern laces her question, the strings on my heart pulling.
I think for a minute. “Good actually. I’m sure I’ll try it again.”
“I can’t say the same, but for you, I’ll do anything.” I smile up at her, loving every second of being with her. I missed her so much while she was locked up. I’m so glad she’s here.
Ever since the cops raided Ravage, they have been questioning all the guys. Most of the brothers were brought in just after Blaze’s shit went down. Lucky for me, I wasn’t there when they started asking questions. Unlucky for me, today is my day.
Cops brought me in this afternoon and I was not happy. Even more pissed off because the brown-eyed fucker that is glaring at me across the table is none other than Officer Lakin. He’s the asshole that ordered the cops to make their search of Ravage as thorough as possible. Fucking dick. I know he thinks that everyone associated with Ravage is a piece of shit, but I don’t give a fuck.
My lawyer showed up about twenty minutes ago and he’s out talking to cops. Since Lakin here can’t ask me questions because he pulled me in and I lawyered up immediately, we sit. He’s pissed, I’m pisse
d. What-the-fuck-ever. It seems like Burnzie is taking his sweet time getting his ass in here. I’m already hot for his ass that he took so long to get here after he was called.
When the door opens, Burnzie’s face is solemn. “Sorry, man, they found a warrant from three years ago from Sinapaw County. Says you failed to appear in court.”
“You have got to be fucking kidding me.” Shit. Lakin smirks and it takes everything inside of me to not leap over the table and beat his ass into the ground.
He shakes his head no instead of using words, probably feeling my anger coming off of me. “Sorry, I can’t get you out of here until we can get a bond hearing with the judge. I will fight it all fucking night if I have to.” He looks over at the cop. “You can go now. I need to speak to my client.” Fucker gives a small chuckle and leaves the room. Asshole better remember who the hell he’s dealing with. He’s already on Ravage’s and my shit list.
Burnzie sits down, his face grim. “Once I talk to the judge, I’ll get you out. It’s five and the courthouse is closed.” That right there pisses me off.
“So since you were late getting here I have to spend a fucking night in jail!” I fume. “Call his ass at home. I’m sure he owes us,” I growl, wanting to get home to Angel. She understands that I have club business, but I always get home to her at night. It may be four in the morning, but I get there.
“Tried, called him personally. He refused. Heard from a source, judge got busted a while back and has people up his ass. I’m guessing he’s watching his ass so close now, that he won’t risk a fuck up.” Burnzie stays standing but leans against the table.
Shit. I wipe my hands over my face, rubbing my eyes over and over. “Did you get me alone?” No way am I in the mood to fight off fuckers all night, but if I have to, I will. I’m sure we have some allies in here, too, but this precinct is pretty small. Hopefully there aren’t any enemies in with me.
“Yeah, but I wouldn’t sleep much if I were you,” Burnzie says, pissing me off more. Fucker.
