They both fell silent as images of what Kit must have gone through on board the reformatory training ship, filled their minds.
At length Ruby said, ‘I thought I might find Marie. Who better to know what happened to Kit, than his own mother?’
‘We haven’t seen hide nor hair of her in years. Or the rest of the family.’ Again a short silence. ‘How about your Pearl? How’s she doing?’
Ruby cradled the fading warmth of the mug in her hands as she began to tell her own tale: of the harsh, unfeeling world of Ignatius House with the nuns, the bullying of Billy and their desperate bid to find their mother, although sadly far too late. She finished off with the grim years in the reformatory, the riot, and Pearl being incarcerated in solitary confinement in a padded cell.
‘As if she were a flippin’ lunatic. Where she is now I have no idea, assuming she’s still sane. She might be working in a factory or skivvying some place. Oh, but I’m desperate to find her. Billy too. I gave my permission for him to go to Canada and now I wish I hadn’t.’
He gave a harsh laugh. ‘They didn’t need your permission. They’d be telling you what they meant to do, not asking.’
‘You’re probably right, but I do so want us both to go to Canada and find him. It’s all I can think of, to make things better for them both. They’ve had such a terrible start in life. Nobody to love them or look after them properly, not like Mam would’ve done. For all we were poor, she had so much love and fun in her, you know?’
‘Aye lass, I know.’
‘That’s all we ever wanted. A bit of love, and food in our bellies. You wouldn’t think it too much to ask, would you?’ Tears were welling up in her eyes, threatening to overflow. Jackdaw put an arm about her shoulder and gave her a comforting hug as they both considered this seemingly impossible dream.
‘But you loved them, eh? Your Pearl and Billy allus knew that.’
‘Look at me. What a mess! It must be talking about it again, and you giving me all this tea and sympathy that’s turned me into a wet lettuce. Oh, but I do hope they knew that I loved them. I do hope so.’
Clearly embarrassed by having caused this emotional outburst, Jackdaw stood up, suddenly all brisk efficiency. ‘Hush now. I can’t be doing with a lass who cries. I know what we’ll do. We’ll ask Charlie and Clem. There’s nowt goes on these parts that they don’t know about. If Kit’s around, one or other of them will have heard.’
‘That would be marvellous!’ Ruby’s spirits rose and fell again in an instant. ‘Oh, but I can’t go just now. Not today.’ She was suddenly all of a fluster. ‘I have to get back before Bart misses me.’
Even as she flung the words at Jackdaw, explaining in short, breathless sentences where she lived and why, that she would come again, she was running from him. She was anxious not to bring the wrath of the baron down upon her. It would never do for him to suspect what she was up to.
Jackdaw stood and watched her go, mouth agape.
Ruby met Jackdaw regularly after that, and each time he would shake his head, gloomily relating his lack of success. After several weeks with no progress, Ruby gave up hope. What had possessed her to imagine for one moment that Kit would want to see her, who’d landed him in all that trouble, even if he were still living in the neighbourhood, which was highly unlikely after what he’d been through?
Jackdaw, however, never gave up hope, or relinquished one jot of his cheerful optimism. ‘I’ve put out the word, and I keep asking around. We’ll find him in the end, never fear.’
And then suddenly there he was. She arrived at their usual meeting place one day to find him waiting for her, a grin on his face as if they’d parted only yesterday, jackdaw bouncing beside him like a delighted puppy.
‘Kit!’
Ruby ran straight into his arms, felt them tighten around her in a big hug before he set her down to examine her face.
‘Hey, lass. How’re keeping?’
‘Oh, why did you never write to me?’
He looked startled by the question. ‘Never got chance.’
‘I kept looking for a letter, and hoping.’
‘Wasn’t easy.’
‘Oh, Kit, I’m so glad to see you.’ She knew her eyes must be shining out her love for him. She felt dazzled, confused, overwhelmed by the mere sight of him, the masculine scent which brought back memories of her first heady encounter with love. Wasn’t he her first sweetheart? Her only one. And ever would be if she’d any say in the matter. From the first moment she’d set eyes on him as a thirteen-year-old girl, she had been utterly smitten, and now here he was, standing right before her. Ruby put a hand to his cheek, unable to resist touching him as if to prove this miracle was true, wanting him to touch her, disappointed when he made no move to do so. But then he’d always been reserved, rather shy of showing his feelings.
He smiled down at her, hands in pockets, the slouch cap as audaciously placed as ever. How she loved that in him, his sense of independence, that he was his own man and would make a move only when he chose. Besides, she was content simply to drink in the glorious sight of him, remind herself how beautiful he was, how utterly irresistible.
‘Jackdaw told me about what happened on the reformatory ship. It must have been hard.’
‘It was no picnic, that’s for sure.’ His face darkened, and Ruby realised that mentioning the ship had been a mistake. She quickly attempted to retract.
‘S-sorry. I didn’t mean to distress you.’
‘I don’t like to talk about it.’ His voice was cold and hard as he turned to glare across at his mate, who instantly fled.
‘Don’t blame jackdaw, I made him tell me.’
An awkwardness had sprung up between them, one Ruby wasn’t sure how to bridge. She felt suddenly uncertain. Kit seemed different somehow, but then weren’t they all? And she’d no wish to lose him again. Not now, after all the time it had taken to find him. She must be patient and not throw herself at him like a silly schoolgirl.
Jackdaw reappeared with a mug of tea for each of them, mumbled some sort of apology then quietly withdrew. They sat together on the low wall to drink it while Ruby haltingly filled Kit in with the details of her life, and how it had been no easier for her. When she reached the part about being forcibly married off by the Board of Guardians to the baron, he lifted his head to look at her more keenly.
‘You’re married to the baron?’ He didn’t sound particularly surprised, or even disappointed, merely interested. But perhaps jackdaw had told him already.
‘Not willingly, and in name only.’ It was important to Ruby that she got this fact across. ‘He took a fancy to me but it’s done him no good. You can take a horse to water ...’
He gave a harsh little laugh. ‘Ever the rebel, Ruby. Good for you.’
They grinned at each other then he sipped his tea before continuing more thoughtfully, ‘I hear he’s well placed, with a string of barges as well as a house that he actually owns. You’ve landed yourself a rich husband there, girl.’
Ruby dismissed this as of no interest to her. ‘He’s got a couple of barges, that’s all. Hardly a string. But he’s not the man I would have chosen for a husband. You know who I would’ve chosen, Kit, if I’d had my way.’
He smiled into her adoring eyes, seeing her transparent love for him, and knew, in that instant, that his decision to meet her had been right. The minute Jackdaw had told him who she was wed to, he’d known he could use this to his advantage. ‘Aye, lass, I feel the same.’
‘Do you? Do you really?’ The thrill of his words almost made Ruby swoon with delight. She could hardly believe it. As he put his arms about her to hold her close, she felt as if all her dreams were coming true at last.
She stayed with him far longer than she should have done but couldn’t seem to tear herself away. It was more than an hour later when she stood up to go. ‘Can I see you again, Kit?’
‘You’re my girl, Ruby. Same as always, husband or no. Isn’t that right?’
Joy burst inside
her like the fireworks on the day of the old Queen’s Jubilee. It was almost too much happiness to bear. ‘Oh, yes, Kit. Yes, I am.’
Then his lips were on hers in the way she had so longed for during all those long lonely years in the reformatory. Ruby swayed in his arms, weak with emotion, overcome by the miracle of finding him again.
But just as her eyes fluttered closed, she caught sight of a movement in the shadows beyond. On a jerk of fear she recognised a familiar figure approaching, striding towards them across the quay. The anger in him was all too evident in the grim expression on his face, and in the rigid set of his powerful shoulders, let alone on the waves of rage that seemed to wash towards her.
Breathless with sudden fear, she thrust Kit aside. ‘Go! You must go, Kit. Now! He’s here. Lord help me! I’ll never get the chance to find our Pearl and Billy now.’
Much to her relief, Kit managed to slip away unnoticed while Bart was grabbing poor Jackdaw by the collar and shaking him till his teeth rattled. He must have thought this was the man she’d been embracing. Had she not caught sight of the poor lad’s ashen face, she might have laughed out loud. Ruby was filled with pity for him for who wouldn’t be terrified of such fury? No one defied the baron’s wishes. Except for her.
‘How dare you follow me! You’ve no right to spy on me.’ Characteristically, it took Ruby no time at all to recover her wits and summon up her usual truculence. It was the only way she knew to protect herself. She confronted him, hands on hips, every line of her body flaunting her defiance.
Bart couldn’t help but feel a surge of admiration, knowing that he could never settle for a compliant wife. Yet deep inside he remained angry, and more hurt than he had any right to be. Certainly more than was good for him. His tone was harsh and uncompromising. ‘Just as well I did, since you and your fancy man here were all wrapped up together like a Christmas parcel.’
To his great annoyance she threw back her head and began to laugh, a deep-throated sound that made him want to stop it with his mouth, to punish her with kisses. Why did she continue to resist him? The thought of some other man’s hand in her hair, caressing her cheek, unbuttoning the cotton bodice of her gown where the soft outline of her breasts strained the fabric, made his blood run cold. The image was unendurable.
She wiped tears of laughter from her eyes with the flat of both hands. ‘Jackdaw isn’t my fancy man, though there might well be one.’ Ruby sent her old friend a warm smile of reassurance that she’d do her best to protect him.
Bart looked as if he might kill Jackdaw anyway, just for the hell of it. But if what she said was true then the other had taken to his heels and fled. And still needed to be found. ‘Who would he be then? Some childhood sweetheart, no doubt.’
‘Wouldn’t you like to know?’
‘I shall put a stop to this nonsense, Ruby.’
‘How? What could you do about it, eh? Nowt!’ She spat the word at him, tipping up on her toes so she could reach him better. ‘I’m your wife in name only. Nothing more. I never asked you to wed me. In fact, I seem to remember that I’d no say in the matter whatsoever, which doesn’t mean you can rule me, or dictate every damn thing that I do.’
‘Watch your language. I’ll not have a woman of mine use foul language.’ He grabbed hold of her wrist and started to drag her away.
Ruby gasped, pummelling his unyielding shoulder with her free fist as she attempted to resist. ‘Drat you, Barthram Stobbs, I’m no woman of yours and never will be.’
She might as well have been a fly battering on walls of granite for all the impression she made. He simply strode on, jaw rigid, making no concession to the fact she had to run to keep pace with him.
Jackdaw chased after them at a safe distance, brandishing a fist. ‘Don’t you lay a finger on Ruby. She’s done nowt wrong. We was only talking over old times.’
Bart ground to a halt and whirled about, golden eyes blazing with wrath. ‘I’d stay out of this lad, if I were you. While you still have a head on your puny shoulders.’ And ignoring Ruby’s pleas and cries for help, he strode away, dragging her ignominiously behind him.
He didn’t pause till they reached the tug, then he swung her up in his arms and carried Ruby on board as if she were no more than a parcel of rubbish he’d picked up off the quay. Ruby fought like a cat with teeth and claws, kicking her legs in a lather of temper, but to no avail. He strode into her cabin and dropped her on the bed, where she lay gasping for breath, nut-brown hair falling loose from its pins and tumbling over her face and shoulders.
‘It’s time you learned to do as you’re told. Any more rebellion, and I’ll consider it mutiny, the punishment for which does not bear thinking about.’ His tone was harsh, jagged with fury.
‘You daren’t do anything to me.’
‘Oh, I dare! I dare anything, Ruby McBride. Make no mistake about that. What I want you to do now is wash your grimy face and get ready for bed. I shall go and make myself and my cabin suitably presentable for a lady. When I am ready, I shall come for you.’
There was triumph in his tone of voice, a terrifying glitter in his searching gaze, then he removed the key from the lock, slammed shut the cabin door and, as Ruby heard it turn on the other side, she screamed out her frustration in an explosion of rage.
‘Drat you! I shall never come willingly. Make me walk the plank if you must. Flog me with a cat o’ nine tails. But you can’t ever make me into your woman!’
The sound of his soft laughter filtered back to her through the panels of the door. ‘Oh, but I can, Ruby. I rather think that I can.’
It was half an hour later when she heard the key in the lock a second time and her heart leaped into her throat on a surge of apprehension. She still had not washed her face, or removed a stitch of her clothing. Nor would she. Ruby had no intention of giving herself willingly to any man other than her beloved Kit, certainly not this one, husband or no. If he insisted on taking her, then it would have to be by brute force. A prospect which, despite her brave thoughts, made her shudder with foreboding.
He stood in the doorway, quietly looking down upon her. ‘I see you have not taken me seriously.’
He was dressed in the silk robe he had worn that first night, except that beneath it she guessed he was quite naked, and her heart fluttered, although not with foreboding this time. His commanding presence seemed to fill the tiny cabin, making him seem taller, more muscular, more strikingly handsome with his tousled, red-gold hair, than she’d ever seen him before. Ruby felt diminished by his power, and by some emotion inside herself she had no wish to examine too deeply.
There seemed to be only two ways of dealing with this. Either she surrendered willingly, or he took her without her consent. Neither prospect appealed. Why did it have to happen now, just when she’d found Kit and had scented happiness at last? She could cry at the unfairness of it all.
‘Perhaps a little night-cap, to relax you?’
She snatched at the offer, then saw how he clenched his teeth in fresh annoyance when she chose cocoa. Alcohol was quite out of the question. She needed to keep her wits about her. Nevertheless, he made the hot drink without protest, watching in silence while she drank it. Ruby made it last as long as possible, sitting in the main living area of the barge, all too aware of the open door to his spacious cabin through which she caught a glimpse of a rumpled bed with a green silken coverlet. She could feel the beat of her heart in her breast, slow and rather breathless.
He did not drink, which surprised her. She’d expected him to take a nip of whisky or rum which he did sometimes of an evening. Instead, he sat looking quite relaxed, hands loosely clasped, elbows on knees as he watched her, his gaze unfathomable. What she could see of his legs beneath the robe were strong and muscled, and bare. She averted her eyes. The tension in the room was palpable, her breath now caught in her throat as if she did not dare to expel it.
At length, he calmly removed the empty mug from her hand. ‘I’ve been a patient man long enough, Ruby. Too patient. I�
��ve done everything in my power to make you comfortable, to provide you with a home, food on the table every night, as well as keep you safe from harm. I’ve even spared you from danger in the very important and essential work that I do. But I am a red-blooded male and you are my wife. I can wait no longer. Most women seem to find me attractive. I cannot understand why you continue to resist. Do you imagine that I’ll hurt you? Have I given you cause to think so?’
‘You still haven’t found Pearl.’ Her voice sounded weak, the excuse feeble, even to her own ears.
His reply was soft, and tinged with sympathy. ‘I know, and I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry too if my irritation on the subject has alarmed you, but I swear I have made several enquiries and will do everything in my power to find her. Come.’ He held out a hand for her to take.
He tried not to show the vulnerability he was feeling, emotions he was not accustomed to experiencing let alone reveal to others. If she rejected him now, Bart hadn’t the first idea what he would do. His passion for her had driven him to the edge of madness, the heat of his desire made his loins ache. How he had managed, in all this time of living at such close quarters with her, not to take her, he would never know. It spoke volumes for the effect she had on him. Above everything he wanted her, and yet respected her right to refuse him, not only because of the nature of their marriage but also because of the high esteem in which he held her.
Something she couldn’t seem to grasp.
But was he capable now of asserting these rights he spoke of so glibly? Did he believe for one moment that such an act would win her? He did not want to lose her. Still she held back, resisting every appeal he made. And then it came to him, on a blinding flash of understanding.
‘Dear heaven, you’re still a virgin. Is that the way of it? Has no man ever touched you?’
Ruby did not answer. She could not. She felt a tightness in her chest, a breathlessness at her own vulnerability. She’d hoped and prayed to give this precious gift to Kit Jarvis and now this man, this hated man, was to rob her of that pleasure too. One by one he had destroyed all her dreams, but she would not allow him to destroy her. Ruby’s chin came up, fists clenched as she leapt to her feet.
Ruby McBride Page 16
