I nodded. “Not only that, the fanatics are still running the show among my people. The ones who believe our God is bent on punishment.”
I’d continued reading the bible to help me give my presentation and answer questions. For the most part, I enjoyed the stories I found in there. It was how the message had been twisted by Church leaders that had screwed Earth up so bad.
Nang rubbed clean the tear that escaped my eye with a gentle thumb. “Will you help me with what I should say to your people? We won’t reach all of them, maybe not even the majority. Still, one less angry Earther is one less I have to defend you against.”
I nodded. “Of course I’ll help. Put your thoughts together, list the objectives of the rescue mission, and I’ll word it for the best effect.”
“Thank you, Shalia. I can’t begin to explain how much I appreciate your help.” He caressed my cheek, and I leaned into his touch. I needed reassurance so badly.
That’s why when he lifted me into his lap, I didn’t resist. Those arms, as big and strong as oak limbs, closed around me. Nang held me tight and safe in the shelter of his embrace. I leaned my face against his chest and cried. He said not one word. He rocked me a bit and occasionally pressed his lips to my forehead.
At some point, those kisses traveled downward. Lost in the desperate need to believe everything was all right, I lifted my face so our lips met. The carnal wave that swept through me when Nang’s tongue crept into my mouth erased all the fear and pain.
The kiss wasn’t torrid by any means. It was gentle but thorough. I tasted raw, powerful male, if that makes any sense. Nang’s knowing kiss made me soft all over. Under his influence, I was small. Helpless. Not in a bad fashion, not when he caused me to feel so safe at the same time. He has a strength that neither Dusa nor Esak possess, as delicious as they are. Nang seems to me like a rock against which the elements shatter. He’s stoic, never bending or breaking.
I would have given him anything at that moment, simply so I could continue to shelter in his might. I was aroused by his kiss and by the slow circles his fingertips drew around my breasts, which caused the tips to stand up in hard, eager points. I stroked his tongue with mine, enjoying the rasp of his flesh. His breath warmed my throat and wafted down to warm my heart as well, which had been frozen from the moment I’d read the note. My belly heated in turn, melting my insides so that liquid seeped from my pussy.
It would have no doubt ended with me beneath Nang’s hard body, his groin driving against mine, but the shuttle arrived to drop Mom off for the night. I moved away from the Dramok commander with real regret. He said his hellos to Mom, who seemed blissfully unaware of any drama.
I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel when it comes to the Kalquorians I’ve had near and real liaisons with. I adore Dusa and Esak, but it was Nang who was there, Nang taking care of me. Nang is the man who has the power to keep me protected.
I am such a mess at the moment. At least Mom and I are safe. I hope.
September 22 (early)
I can’t sleep. Never mind that there are guards standing outside my door; I’m still waiting to be attacked. A lot of weapons were left lying around after Armageddon. Who knows who has what out there, ready to use it on me or Mom? Blasters, in particular. If enough people are pissed off at me, they could overwhelm the two Nobeks outside, come in, and kill us before any help could possibly arrive. They may decide to forego the whole torture issue and go straight to the execution.
Another issue I’m wrestling with is my morality. I never had to worry about that because: a. I didn’t buy into the whole ‘sex outside of marriage will put you in Hell’ mantra; and b. I didn’t get anything out of sex anyway, so I wasn’t having it unless it was forced on me.
Well, ‘b’ has been blown out the window. I enjoy sex. Specifically, sex with aliens. Two at once! If I hadn’t read about the Israelites having multiple wives, I’d feel worse about it, but it still strikes me as kind of immoral. I guess I’m a product of my society after all. It was great while it was happening, but now I’m kind of questioning it. Am I a bad person for sleeping outside my species? With doing it with more than one guy at a time?
Oh, and let’s not even start about the third guy who’s put himself on my radar, Dramok Nang. I’m attracted to him too. He’s interesting because he’s different from Dusa and Esak. He’s more mature. Here’s a man interested in not just his favorite incredibly loud music, but also subjects I’m interested in. I have the idea we could have much more intellectual conversations than I can expect from Dusa and Esak. Nevertheless, I care about my youngsters. They’re so sweet and cute, and they do stuff to me that makes my hair stand on end.
I have no idea what I’m supposed to do. I don’t want to hurt them. I have no idea if indulging my fascination with Nang would upset them. Would they even care? I’m too afraid to ask.
It’s not like we’ve pledged ourselves to each other. I tell myself that, but it makes me squirmy to think they’d be hurt or angry or see me as what the Earthers have decided I am: a whore. I’ve got no clue what’s right or wrong in Kalquorian society. Meanwhile, I’m all too aware of what is wrong in mine. I am playing with fire, and it could get me killed.
Well, enough of me wrestling with my sex demons. I need to wake Mom up. Her shuttle will be here soon.
September 22 (later)
It’s amazing what sleep does to fix an attitude. After sending Mom off to her daytime activities, I went back to bed and grabbed some winks. I’m much better, especially since Dusa sent me a message while I was conked out. He and Esak asked me and the old lady to join them for dinner tonight. We’ll sit around and gab until Mom is ready to go to bed. Once she’s squared away, I’ll go to their quarters for a little...ahem...‘dessert’.
Yes, I’m back on the upswing of my eternal seesaw. I’m once more believing I deserve a bit of fun after the hell I’ve been through. I want to kick overbearing morality to the curb with the thought that it’s what put Earth on the extinction list. No doubt I’ll second guess my behavior again at some point in the near future. Maybe I’m as bipolar as my mother. It’s one extreme or the other. I need counseling.
But for now, I’ll settle for sex. It gives me something to look forward to. When I’m getting laid, I don’t worry about stuff. Being scared and angry are the last notions on my mind.
I still don’t know what I’ll do about my attraction to Nang. It would fix everything if I didn’t have to see him again, but I’m almost done putting my presentation together. In fact, I should tell him we need to sit down and talk about it tomorrow. Eep! Temptation will no doubt raise its ugly head. I should find out what Dusa and Esak think about me being with another man. Or maybe I should just tell Nang no. That’s easy enough until he puts those hands and mouth on me. Then my brain short-circuits and I’m a puddle of goo.
Damn, why can’t I have my cake and eat it too? Hmm. Or would that be, why can’t I have my Kalquorians and – hahahahaha. I am so nasty.
Well, crap on it. I’ll work on the presentation, go grab Mom, meet the cuties, and have my fun. Live today, because I might be gone tomorrow. That would be a certainty if darned uptight Earthers have their way.
September 23 (early)
Last night was good. Mom gave Esak his cap and he put it on right away. He showed no trace of reluctance whatsoever, though the cap was a prissy shade of lilac and hot as the blazes. Even at night, the air feels akin to warm bathwater around here. Nevertheless, Esak wore his knitted cap as if it were the most natural thing in the world and thanked Mom profusely for looking out for his welfare.
Mom said, “Don’t worry, Dusa, I haven’t forgotten about you. I want to do something extra special since you found the yarn. It might take a while though. That Commander Nang has such a big head, and I promised him a scarf too. Yours will be next though!”
Dusa bowed his head with a smile. “You are too kind, Matara Eve.”
Dinner was relaxed. I took the opportunity to ask about Dusa and Esa
k’s – courtship? I guess that’s what you’d call it.
I asked, “When you two were considering becoming clanmates, did you hang out together exclusively? I take it you weren’t as, um, friendly with other Nobeks, Dusa.”
Yep, I was digging for information. I needed to know whether or not to remain exclusive with these two for as long as we found each other so enticing.
Dusa looked at Esak, who grinned slyly. Dusa snorted and said, “Actually, I was spending a lot of time with another Nobek when Esak and I met. I saw them both simultaneously for a little while.”
I nodded. “So it was no big deal.”
Dusa shrugged. “I wasn’t clanned, so I was free to explore my options. A few weeks later, the other Nobek started avoiding me, so I decided he was no longer interested. I later found out Esak had gotten him into a rather precarious position and told him he could step away or get badly hurt.”
I arched an eyebrow at Esak. “A precarious position?”
The Nobek grinned like a wolf. “One should be very careful leaning over a balcony that’s a hundred feet in the air.”
“Leaning?” Dusa rolled his eyes. “Esak dangled him by his ankles.”
“I knew who was meant to be my Dramok,” the Nobek said, not ashamed in the least. “Your other suitor needed some persuasion to understand the truth of the situation.”
Wow. I didn’t know whether to be impressed or horrified with Esak’s possessive tactics.
Dusa laughed. “We are a perfect fit. Now we need an Imdiko.”
“I’m intrigued by that Weln. I think he’s interested in us too.”
“Oh, he takes care of Mom during the mornings and early afternoons,” I said. “He’s a sweetheart.”
Dusa glanced at me. “You like him, Shalia?”
“He’s wonderful. He treats Mom as if she’s a queen. You should definitely...um...talk to him.” Good heavens, I couldn’t say ‘date’. They were all men. Though I had a suspicion that ‘date’ was the correct term, it was still too taboo for me to say.
Dusa nodded. “I have spoken to Imdiko Weln a little. He seems a potential prospect.” He glanced at Esak. “We’ll arrange to spend some time with him, if he’s interested.”
Esak smirked. “Actually, I already have and he is. You’ll like him. A lot.”
Dusa’s eyes narrowed. “Nobek, you and I are going to have a talk later.”
Esak’s smile disappeared. “Yes, my Dramok.”
That closed the conversation down. I kind of had what I needed to know anyway, so that was fine. I hoped Esak hadn’t gotten himself in too much trouble with Dusa. It was interesting to see how steely the Dramok became with his fierce-looking clanmate and how quick Esak was to bow to his command.
This is weird, but it kind of got me hot to see how firm Dusa could be.
I was more than ready for alone time with the boys after Mom was settled for the night. I felt rather awkward as we went from my dorm to Dusa and Esak’s. I have a bodyguard following me around. This fellow manning the night shift was older than my pair and very scary looking. He had a demeanor that made me think if any of my detractors came along, they’d run screaming the instant he stared at them. I didn’t ask his name. I didn’t want that vicious glare aimed at me.
It was with a lot of embarrassment and not a small amount of relief to close the door, leaving Big Scary outside to keep an eye on the world. No doubt he knew what I was up to with the two men, who kind of swaggered all the way to their dorm. I guess scoring an Earther girl for a few hours is a matter of pride for the Kalquorians. I vowed to keep as quiet as possible during our tryst.
That’s hard to do when you’re being tied down. Yes, tied down. The instant everybody was naked, Dusa and Esak put me on all fours on the floor. Then they did that freaky ‘moving so fast they’re blurs’ thing. My ankles were suddenly flex-tied to the legs of the room’s desk, and I was on my elbows because my wrists were bound together and tied to one of the bed’s supports. I never had a second to protest. I looked up at my captors, my eyes and mouth wide open in shock.
“She looks good with her ass in the air,” Esak observed.
“Very good,” Dusa agreed. He stood over me with a not-so-nice grin that caused my heart to flutter and my pussy to drool.
“Hey...guys?” I said, hoping I didn’t sound too scared. “Um, this wasn’t what I expected for fun and games tonight.”
“No?” Dusa sank down on the floor to lie on his back next to me. His cocks pointed at the ceiling while he reached beneath me to tweak first one nipple, then the other. Electric zingies fired down from his touch to my clit. “Maybe we wanted to surprise you.”
“Count me surprised,” I laughed weakly. “Can we do this without the bondage?”
Esak kneeled on the opposite side. His big, warm hand rubbed over my butt. “But it makes you helpless for us. You can’t get away.”
“Yeah, well it’s kinda freaking me out.” Panic edged into my voice.
“And exciting you.” Esak’s hand moved down to stroke my open cleft. His fingers found me soaking wet, and I couldn’t help but push into his caressing fingers.
“Does being afraid arouse you, Shalia?” Dusa’s voice was deceptively quiet.
I stared at him. I didn’t know how to answer. My pulse drummed fast, and I felt my vulnerability. I thought they would untie me if I insisted, but there was that nagging doubt in my head that said they might not. I was bound and at their mercy. They could take me without any trouble at all. I looked at Dusa’s cocks, huge and swollen and ready to shove inside me.
I was afraid. I was also incredibly turned on. More than ever, I realized how messed up my head was, and my body even more so as it continued to gush need over Esak’s stroking fingers.
“I’ve lost my mind,” I groaned.
Dusa grinned. “I have mastered you before. You seem to enjoy having a strong man take care of your needs, even when you’re a bit nervous. Especially when you’re nervous.” He tugged on my nipple, his grasp firm enough to gift the slightest sliver of pain. I shuddered and watched him, like a trapped fly might watch an approaching spider.
Esak slid a finger into my pussy. I moaned and couldn’t help but move against him, taking him as deep as my imprisoned body would allow. He worked in and out of me, fucking me with first one, and then two fingers.
Dusa moved to the other breast and tugged on it too, watching me as I bit my lip against the bit of sting. He said, “You said you trusted me. I hope to find out how much.”
I didn’t know what he wanted from me. I wasn’t sure if I could give him whatever it was.
His voice was gentle but firm. I sensed the same control he wielded over Esak being placed over me. “You will submit to all we wish. You will accept our control over your body without question or complaint. You only protest if something we do is beyond your physical or emotional abilities to withstand.”
Esak’s attentions went to my ass. He put both fingers, slick from me, inside. I shuddered as he worked the tight ring of muscles, stretching them for use.
Dusa grasped my chin and made me look at him. His eyes were steady, uncompromising. “Do you understand what I expect from you, Shalia? Absolute obedience to our desires. If you are in too much pain or overwhelmed, say sholt, and we’ll stop.”
I froze. “Pain?” I whispered.
He shook his head slightly. “Not the pain that results from being taken against your will. This pain—” he tugged at my nipple again, bringing a heady bolt of discomfort “—or this pain.” He nodded to Esak.
There was a slap and a sting against my butt cheek. I yelped more in surprise than anything else. Warmth pulsed from the spot Esak had smacked. The heat crept inside, mixing with the churning tickle in my belly. It smarted, but – but it was weirdly nice in a way. It went along with the whole tied up and helpless motif that had me going.
I tried to think straight. I liked pain? It shouldn’t be, yet...yet honey continued to creep down my thighs.
I looked up at Dusa. “You won’t hurt me? You’ll stop if I say that word?”
He cupped my chin and kissed me with a gentle mastery that wiped my mind clean of anything but his and Esak’s touches. I gave myself over to him, feeling safe despite all he’d done and said.
The kiss ended, and Dusa gazed at me with reassurance. “The word is sholt. Say it, Shalia.”
“Sholt,” I repeated.
“Will you surrender yourself to us?”
Shalia's Diary Omnibus Page 14
