Addictive

by Jessica Prince

  “I have some of my guys checking it out right now to make sure whoever broke in isn’t still there.”

  I jerk back in his hold, but his arms tighten, refusing to let me go. “You think someone’s in there right now?” I shriek.

  He lifts his hands and runs his fingers through the hair at my temples before cupping my cheeks in his big hands. “No, my bella. I have a feeling I know who did this, and if my gut’s right, he’s long gone.”

  “That’s why you didn’t want the police involved,” I say on a whisper as I look into those stormy gray eyes. “You know who did this. It’s someone tied to you.”

  I see his emotions warring as he stares back at me. Something akin to regret wins out as he gives me a jerky nod.

  I let out a shaky breath and clench my eyes closed tightly.

  “They’re using me to get to you, aren’t they?”

  All I get is another nod.

  I don’t know how I should be feeling right now. I’m angry with Gabriel for bringing all of this into my life. I’m terrified someone is out there who wants to use me to get to him. I’m frustrated that my life is in such upheaval. And I’m pissed as all hell that, even with all this shit going on right now, I’m still in love with him. He’s responsible for my world falling apart, and I still love him. What the hell is wrong with me?

  “I can’t believe this,” I whispered. The anger simmering just below the surface finally boils over. “I can’t fucking believe this!” Snatching myself out of Gabriel’s embrace, I begin pacing back and forth, my feet pounding against the pavement with each furious step. “Because of your past, I’m the one being targeted. Do you see how messed up that is?”

  He rakes his hands through his hair, clearly as angry as I am. “You think I don’t know this, Marley? Do you think I don’t understand I’m the one who brought this shit into your life? I fucking know! But I can’t fix the mistakes I made in the past. I did a lot of really bad things, but I had a really, fucking good reason for them! I hate the fact my shit is falling on you; but I’ll be damned if I walk away now, especially, when I’m the only fucking one who can protect you.”

  “I wouldn’t need protecting, if it weren’t for you!” I shout back, having lost all semblance of control. “If you’d just left me alone in the first goddamned place, I wouldn’t be going through all of this!”

  “Deal with it!” he seethes. “You think I planned on falling in love with you? I never planned to get close to anyone after I lost my family. But fuck if I had any control over that. I fucking love you, Marley. And I will do every goddamned thing in my power to make sure you are safe. It fucking pisses me off that I’m the one who brought all this on; but if this means tying you to me in any way I can, then I won’t fucking regret it. You’re mine. You. Are. Mine. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you if I have to, my bella.”

  I open my mouth to continue our fight, but I’m cut off. “Boss, it’s clear.”

  I turn to see Aldo standing next to a man I’ve never seen before. He has dark hair and eyes, and the same olive complexion as Gabriel and Aldo. He’s only a few inches shorter than Gabriel, which means he towers over me. But standing next to Aldo’s giant frame, he looks positively tiny.

  “We will finish this later,” Gabriel whispers between clenched teeth before turning back to his men. “Let’s go.”

  I stand frozen in place as the three men head in the direction of my apartment. It takes a few seconds to realize Gabriel meant for me to tag along. Jogging to catch up with them, I almost run into the back of the man I’ve never seen before when he stops short right outside my apartment door.

  “Careful there, sweetheart,” he tells me with an endearing smile as he reaches out and grabs hold of my arms to steady me.

  “Sorry,” I mutter in embarrassment. My eyes dart along his face, taking in his strong jaw and the fine cut of his cheekbones. This close I can see his eyes aren’t just brown, but flecked with gold and green as well. Good lord, does Gabriel employ any average looking men? This one is just as handsome as all the others I’ve seen. I can’t help but let my gaze travel along his handsome features. He clears his throat and my eyes shoots back to his, a deep blush creeping up my cheeks at being caught openly gawking.

  A laugh rumbles from his broad chest. “Quite all right, sweetheart. Won’t find me complaining about being run into by a beautiful woman.”

  His compliment causes a smile to tip the corners of my lips. Nothing in his eyes leads me to believe he’s anything more than a nice guy. I don’t hold the same attraction for him as I do for Gabriel, but I’m not blind. I can certainly appreciate his rugged masculinity. And the kindness in his smile helps to put me at ease.

  “When you’re done eye-fucking my woman, Carlo, you think we can get to work?”

  The outrage dripping from Gabriel’s statement jerks my attention to him. Eyes narrowed and jaw clenched, I hope my anger at his offensive comment is coming off loud and clear.

  “Sorry, boss,” Carlo says with a carefree laugh, as if the murderous look in Gabriel’s eyes doesn’t scare him in the slightest.

  Gabriel lets out a huff and jerks his chin in the direction of my apartment. Carlo, clearly understanding his silent instructions, makes his way through the door, followed by a grinning Aldo.

  I step forward to try to go through, but I’m stopped when Gabriel cuts into my path. “Mine, Marley. Don’t forget that. I’d love nothing more than to fuck a reminder into that pretty little head of yours.”

  I can’t formulate a response even if I want to. After delivering that little nugget, he turns and walks into my apartment, leaving me stunned speechless. I stand slack-jawed outside the door for several seconds, before finally coming to my senses and following them inside. What I see knocks the air right out of my lungs.

  Destroyed. Absolutely everything I own is destroyed. The furniture is ripped apart and overturned. Books lie on the floor with pages torn from them and scattered about the room. Picture frames are broken. Glass is everywhere. In a haze, I step over debris to get to my bedroom. A lingering glance into my bathroom shows a slashed shower curtain dangling pathetically from only a few rings, broken perfume bottles, and crushed cosmetics everywhere. Whoever did this also felt the need to punch their fist through my mirror.

  Once in the bedroom, I can see the chaos in the other rooms is nothing compared to what’s in here. The drawers of my dresser have been pulled out and thrown around the room. Every article of clothing I own is lying on the ground, shredded to ribbons. As I rummage through everything, I can’t find one salvageable thing to wear. The mattress looks like someone took a fucking chainsaw to it, hacking it into pieces. Stuffing and exposed springs litter the floor. But the most disturbing thing of all? That would have to be my underwear. Every single pair of panties and bra that I own lay on the floor in nice, neat stacks. Someone actually went to the trouble of clearing a spot on the carpet and expertly folded each item and arranged them in a way you’d see them in a store. Whoever did this also left a red rose lying across the top of the stacks of underwear.

  Just the thought of someone’s hands being all over them makes my skin crawl. There’s absolutely no way in hell I’m ever wearing any of those again.

  “What the fuck?”

  The whispered curse pulls me from my musings. When I turn, all three men are staring down at the pile of underwear with matching looks of pissed-right-the-fuck-off. And Gabriel’s seems the worst. It looks like he’s just seconds away from his head exploding.

  “It doesn’t look like they took a goddamned thing,” Aldo seethes as he takes in our surroundings. “Marley, can you tell if anything’s missing?”

  I scan the room as well and shake my head. “No. I can’t see that anything has been stolen. They just trashed the place.” I turn back to the men. “Why would someone do this? What’s the point of breaking into my place just to destroy everything I own? And what the fuck is that with my panties!” I finish on a yell, growing increasing
ly frantic the longer I stand in the middle of the destruction, which was once my home.

  “Calm down, my bella,” Gabriel says in a calm voice. In one step, he’s chest to chest with me, pulling me into the wide expanse and wrapping his big arms around my trembling body. I shouldn’t be reveling in the security I’m feeling being surrounded by him. My body shouldn’t be responding to him the way it is. His closeness, his smell, the warmth of his body, all pack a lust filled punch directly to my core. This is so not good.

  Placing my palms on his chest and pushing, I try to put some much needed space between us. “Thank you for showing up here and making sure whoever broke in was gone,” I say to all three of them. “It’s getting late. You don’t have to stick around. All I’m going to be doing is cleaning all night anyway.”

  “Like fuck you are.”

  My head jerks back at Gabriel’s harsh words.

  “Excuse me?”

  “If you think you’re staying here, you’ve lost your damn mind.”

  And just like that, a switch is flipped and he’s back to being controlling Gabriel. “This is my home. You can’t tell me I can’t stay here.” I prop my hands on my hips and glare in an attempt to seem tough, when really I’m shaking like a leaf inside. Why would someone do something like this? And what the hell does Gabriel expect? It’s not as if I have anywhere else I can go. I can’t bring myself to impose on Carmen any more than I already have, and Matty lives with his boyfriend, Caleb. That would just feel….weird.

  He takes a step toward me again, causing me to step back to maintain distance. Only problem with that is I managed to snag my foot on one of the loose mattress springs and begin to fall. I have no choice but to grab his arm in an attempt to stay upright. This just leads to another struggle of will when I have to break from his hold once again. “Thanks,” I mutter agitatedly once I’ve righted myself.

  “Marley, you aren’t staying here. End of discussion.”

  “You can’t tell me what to do, Gabriel. We aren’t together anymore. Or have you managed to forget that little fact…again!”

  His jaw begins to tick, and I’m just waiting for him to blow. “Someone broke into your goddamned apartment and trashed it! They didn’t steal a thing. They spent a really long fucking time making sure to destroy every single thing you own. Do you not see something seriously fucked up with this situation?”

  “Of course, I see something wrong with it!”

  “Then you Are. Not. Staying. Here!”

  “FINE!” I storm passed him and head for the bar where I dropped my purse. “I’ll stay with Carmen.” Wait, wasn’t I just thinking I couldn’t do that?”

  “The hell you will.”

  I spin back around on my heel and throw my arms out. “Then where the hell do you think I should stay, Gabriel? You said yourself I can’t stay here. Carmen’s is the only place I have to go.”

  “You’re staying with me.”

  “Like fuck I am!” I shout, mimicking his earlier statement.

  “You’ll be protected at my house. No offense to your tiny little friend, but I don’t trust Carmen with your safety.”

  A humorless laugh bubbles up from my throat. “Oh, and I should trust you? Have we so easily forgotten that night at my house when I was eighteen?”

  He flinches, and a shadow of something crosses his face, disappearing before I can recognize it. Guilt instantly bombards me at my callous words. It was a low blow.

  Schooling his features and narrowing his eyes, Gabriel says, “We’ll talk about that later. You’re coming home with me.”

  “No!” I demand, jerking my arm from his grasp.

  “Marley,” he says in a warning voice, but I don’t care. “Stop being difficult.”

  “Stop being a controlling asshole.”

  Snorts of laughter echo from behind me, and I turn just in time to see Carlo and Aldo both try to hide their smiles.

  “Enough,” Gabriel bellows right before he takes two quick steps in my direction. Before I have a chance to react, his shoulder is in my stomach and the whole room tips upside down.

  “Gabriel!” I yell. “Put me down!” One punch to his back earns me a swift smack to my ass, hard enough to make me pause. The pleasure/pain coursing through my blood from one stinging slap causes wetness to flood my panties. I have to bite my lip to stifle the involuntary moan threatening to escape at his familiar touch. Images of what happened the last time he spanked me tumble through my mind. Oh God, this is so not good!

  “You two, ride back in Marley’s car. Make sure to stop off and get her whatever she needs for tonight. I’ll handle the rest.”

  “What?” I squeak from my upside down position. Using Gabriel’s rock hard ass, I try to push up enough to see Aldo and Carlo laughing hysterically. Those assholes. I’m definitely telling Carmen the shit Aldo pulled tonight. She’ll have his balls for this, no doubt.

  “No worries, my bella. You and I are going shopping tomorrow.”

  With that, we’re out the door. My mind can’t work fast enough to get control of this situation.

  Once again, Gabriel is getting what he wants.

  The second the elevator doors open to Gabriel’s apartment, I rush out, making a beeline straight for one of the guestrooms, slamming and locking the door behind me. He might have gotten his way with getting me here, but that doesn’t mean I’m required to spend any more time in his presence than I already have.

  “Marley,” Gabriel calls from the other side of the door.

  “Go away!”

  I can hear his weighted sigh through the heavy wood. “Marley, we need to talk. And I’m sure you need to eat something.”

  My betraying stomach rumbles loudly at the mention of food, but I’ll be damned if I let him know that. “I’m not hungry. And there’s nothing to talk about!”

  “Stop being difficult!”

  “Go fuck yourself!”

  Something hits the door¸ causing a thump so loud it startles a yelp from me. I stand silently for several seconds, trying to hear anything from the other side, only relaxing when I hear his retreating footsteps. Thankfully, it becomes obvious that Gabriel gave up and has walked away. I collapse back on the bed in relief and close my eyes, willing sleep to take over with the hope that when I wake up in the morning, I’ll discover this has all been one bad dream.

  But my relief is short lived when the sound of the lock turning echoes just seconds before the bedroom door flies open, smacking into the wall behind it. “What the hell?” I screech as I scramble up against the headboard and Gabriel stalks toward me.

  “It’s my house, baby. You honestly think I don’t have a key to every fucking lock in it?”

  Dammit. My body slumps in defeat, the indignation that’s been coursing through my veins all night disappears instantly, leaving me emotionally and physically exhausted. Because anger has gotten me exactly nowhere with this man, I have little choice but to resort to begging. “Please, Gabriel, just go away. I’m exhausted. I can’t do this right now.”

  His stormy gray eyes soften just a touch with what looks like remorse before they harden once again with determination. “Too fucking bad. I’ve played this game your way for weeks now, my bella. Now it’s my turn.”

  My spine stiffens. I quickly move off the bed to stand in front of him. “Game? You think this is a goddamned game, Gabriel?” I shout as I drill my finger into his chest. “This isn’t a game! I’m not playing with you. I’m trying to live my fucking life with some semblance of normalcy! Every day I wake up and attempt to act like a regular person, not some broken, lonely girl with a shameful past. This isn’t a game. You lied to me. You tricked me into believing in something that wasn’t real, and you broke my trust along with my heart. And you think that’s a game? Like I told you before, go fuck yourself; I’m done.”

  “It was real. It is real,” he insists as he takes a step closer to me, pinning the hand I’m using to poke him against his chest right over his heart. “I didn’t trick you, my b
ella. And I never lied to you. I may have kept things from you, but I never outright lied.”

  I scoff and try to step back, but he grips my hand, effectively halting me. “You never outright lied? Are you kidding me? What about when you told me, you’ve never not used a condom, huh? You had a child! That’s one lie right there! And as far as everything else is concerned, a lie by omission is still very much a lie. You can spin it any way you want, but it doesn’t change anything.”

  With one last step, he moves so close that every part of our bodies is touching. His expression is resolute. “The day Camilla and Robby died, the man I was then died with them. Telling you that you were the only one I’d been with like that wasn’t an intentional lie, Marley. The man you met never fucked a woman without protection. The man you met never would have taken the risk of getting another woman pregnant. I’m not the same person now that I was back then.”

  I narrow my eyes as I look into his, seeing nothing but sincerity in his gaze. But I refuse to waver. “Semantics.”

  “It’s the truth!” His tone is abrupt, unrelenting.

  “No, it isn’t. You’re trying to twist things to your benefit so you don’t have to be held responsible for your actions. You refuse to admit you lied? Fine. But can you honestly look me in the eyes and tell me you never intentionally deceived me?”

  My breath stalls as I look up at him, waiting for his answer. His eyes widen and his mouth opens as if he’s about to argue, only to snap back shut as defeat washes over his face. He can’t say it. He can’t tell me his deception wasn’t intentional because it was.

  That realization causes a sharp pain to slice through my chest. “Deception is worse than lies,” I whisper brokenly as the sting of tears begins to burn the backs of my eyes. I can’t look at him anymore. I won’t allow him to see me cry over him.

  He must sense my devastation because he reluctantly releases his hold on my hand, allowing me to move away from him. I quickly turn my back to him, batting away the few tears that manage to break free and trail down my cheeks.