I stand, walk over, and grab the railing of the ferry. It’s beautiful but cold, the water choppy against the boat, the wind swirling around the walkway. I wish I could let go and float away on a sudden jet stream, go somewhere warm where I was safe. I feel so incredibly alone.
I can’t meet his eyes, so I just blurt it out, “I think one or both of them is going to marry me, trick me into signing something…and then they’re going to kill me Bradley…in the Bahamas. I’ll probably be dead in a few weeks.”
I want a drink. Why am I confiding in Bradley? We aren’t together anymore. He doesn’t care. I feel the tears forming and I lean down so my wild hair covers my face. I might as well let it all out.
“Oh, and I told Viktor you were my asshat, my previous lover, of course none of that matters now, not since I’ll be dead at the bottom of the ocean.”
I look out at the hauntingly gorgeous waterfront and sigh.
“So, what’s your news?”
Chapter Twenty-One
Let’s go crazy
BRADLEY
Thursday, February17th
She’s late. Naomi is never late. I pace the dock, check my phone, pace some more. Seagulls laugh over my head, as the sun dips in and out of fat white clouds on its way to setting. The breeze is stronger out here by the water, and I’m wondering if the ferry might be a mistake. Even though it was mild all day, with the sun going to bed, it’s starting to feel like February again. I scan the streets and see a brown sedan pull up. The first thing that comes out of the back door is one long, lean leg, followed by another, and then Naomi rises up and looks around. She doesn’t seem to see me as she rushes toward the bench where I’ve parked my stuff. The next thing I know, she’s in my arms, and I don’t want to let go. But of course we’re ‘just friends’ now, so I must. Gentleman stuff. When I see her face, there are tears in her eyes, so I ask her what’s wrong. She waves me away, wipes her face with the back of her hands, she’s all business.
“I have news, so much to tell you.” She takes off her coat for some reason I can’t understand. I’m freezing. Then I see she’s wearing a clingy dress that almost looks like lingerie and I do understand: she wants me to notice her. Damn, she’s so hot, I forget about the cold but I don’t want to go overboard and risk scaring her away. So I give her a lame compliment designed not to offend.
“You look nice Naomi, can’t get over your look, the black hair.”
“Well, you left with Molly and never came back, so I decided to change myself into a woman a guy would want.”
How many times do I have to explain this, I think.
“Naomi, you didn’t have to change…”
Then she starts going on and on about being boring and working late and then she laughs this weird croaky sound. I’m starting to worry about her. She seems like she might be a little crazy. I look around the pier, but there isn’t another soul. This is good. I need time with her without the risk of being seen together. The ferry should be here soon and then we can have a calm talk. I need to break the news about her aunt and the connection with Broderick. But now I look at her, and the condition she’s in, it might break her. I’m just about to start my story when she says she has something to tell me and that she needs my help.
“I know. I have lots of news for you too. I need to tell you about what Manny…”
But she ignores me and starts digging around her handbag. Next thing I know, there’s two diamond rings on the bench between us. I stare at them in disbelief. Where is Viktor getting all these diamonds from? And why does Naomi keep accepting engagement rings like little wieners at a cocktail party?
“What the hell are those?” I ask, and fix her with my stare. So she lays the whole thing out. She’s now engaged to two men, none of whom are me. If that’s not the behavior of a crazy person, I don’t know what is. I’m about to say so. I open my mouth, shut it, take a deep breath. I can’t call her crazy, that’s not fair. She rushes on with her story, tells me she thinks Viktor and Broderick are planning some real estate deal. The ferry arrives and we step on with a few suits and a family of five.
After we leave the dock, she continues with her story as we hold onto the rails and watch Manhattan fall away from us. We head toward the Statue of Liberty as she tells me she thinks one or maybe both men want to marry her and then kill her off—IN THE BAHAMAS. Can this shit get any weirder? Oh yeah. It will once I tell her about the aunt and summers at the beach. In spite of the sea breeze and dropping temperatures, I start to sweat. I can’t tell her that now. Look at her. She’s crying again. God I need a drink. Then she drops this little bomb.
“Oh, and I told Viktor you were my asshat, my previous lover, of course none of that matters now, not since I’ll be dead at the bottom of the ocean.”
She’s shaking now, so I take her coat and wrap it around her, fighting every instinct to take her in my arms and wipe away those tears. That’s boyfriend stuff and I don’t know how she would take that. She might respond or she might push me overboard. I guess the moment has passed when she changes the subject and asks me about my news. We both stare out at water and the beautiful Verrazano Bridge and then I can’t stand it anymore. I don’t care what happens. I turn her toward me and cup her face in my hands. She doesn’t pull away and that’s good enough for me. I kiss her, softly at first, then harder. She kisses back and all our nights together flood back into my body. I want to forget about Viktor, Broderick, LaLa, real estate, murder in the Bahamas. I want this—her in my arms and our mouths searching for each other’s taste. My little soldier snaps to attention and I pull her closer so she can feel how much I want her totally. My news can definitely wait.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Just being kind
NAOMI
Thursday, February17th
Bradley kisses me. I return it, feelings I don’t want coursing through my veins. His lips feel even better than I remember, but he’s only being kind. He was always a sucker for a woman in tears. I shudder from the excitement of his embrace and the cold. Then reality returns as he shifts away from me as the boat hits a fierce wave. I close my coat. I’m embarrassed I dressed up for him. Bradley must think I’m making a desperate play to get him back.
When I was telling him about my problem, my situation and confessing to him how scared I was, I saw that fast smirk, his look of disbelief. When I mentioned the Bahamas I thought he would burst out laughing. Bradley doesn’t believe me. He looked at me as if I’m some drug addict just escaped from lockdown. Or worse, like I’m making a scene to gain his attention. Something my mother would always do, pretend to be in a crisis, so my father would pay attention to her. The memory makes me sick and I realize I should not have come. Bradley doesn’t have a horse in this race anymore; he’s free of my problems and me. I stop crying, as if the cold froze my tears, and I step away.
“It’s alright, never mind, I got it.”
I blow my nose and pull my long hair up high with my hands, trying to tie it in a knot. It keeps blowing free, and I give up, wishing I had one of Viktor’s Russian scarves.
“Sorry Bradley, forget what I said. I’m fine. Why did you call, some news about another job, or a new roommate? You get engaged?”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Ferry tales can come true
BRADLEY
Thursday, February17th
I’m working my signature moves and everything’s going great when a strong wave hits the bow of the ferry, jarring us apart. I’m ready to dive right back in, but Naomi steps back and wraps her coat tighter around her. She seems to have stopped crying and her face has hardened again.
“It’s alright, never mind, I got it.”
Got what? I wonder. She fusses with her hair in the wind, blows her nose. Makes some smart ass crack about my news being that I’m engaged.
“No, I think that seems to be your department,” I shoot back and to my surprise, she laughs. Okay. Good. I try a smile. She smiles back. I take a deep breath. It’s time to tell he
r all about LaLa. I hope she’s still smiling when I finish.
“So,” I begin, “remember when we decided to go get some intel on our own and then report back?”
“Yeah.”
“I happened to talk to Manny about it.” She rolls her eyes at this.
“I know you don’t like him, but he has, you know, connections. I figured it was worth a shot.”
“Well, was it?” Naomi puts her hands on her hips, cocks her head to the side.
I take another deep breath and launch into the story from the beginning. When I get to the part about LaLa she stops me.
“You met LaLa Cologne?” Her eyes are wide as dinner plates.
“You know who she is?”
“Are you kidding? She’s one of the richest women in New York. Made a killing in real estate in the eighties. Better than my mother ever did. For a while there were only two names anyone knew in the business: Trump and Cologne. She’s been in every society magazine and social page consistently since then. She does tons of charity work.”
“Geez, I didn’t know all that. Seemed like a nice lady.” I continue my story, watching her face carefully. I get to the part about LaLa being her mother’s sister, just as the ferry docks in Staten Island. The other passengers line up to disembark, but Naomi is frozen in place. Maybe I shouldn’t have told her here. I take her elbow and try to steer her toward the gangplank. She’s not budging. “Naomi?” No answer. She stares off into the water until the captain comes over to remind us to exit. This seems to snap her back to life and she lets me escort her from the boat. We could get right back on and return to Manhattan, but I think we both could use a drink around now. We find a little tapas bar and slip into a booth, order some sangria.
“You hungry?” I ask. She just stares at her menu. I think she might be in shock. A waiter comes by with sizzling platters of food and my stomach makes a mighty growl. I don’t know how I’m going to pay for this eight-dollar pitcher of sangria, let alone any food. Our waitress drops a basket of still-warm tortilla chips and some salsa on the table and I almost get up and hug her. She tells us to let her know when we’re ready to order and I think, don’t hold your breath.
Zombie Naomi picks up her sangria and drains the glass. Then she pours a second one and drains that, too. She puts down her glass and looks at me. “I want to hear the rest. You said there was more and I want to hear it.”
“I, uh, maybe we should eat?” I hope against hope that Darren’s credit card is still burning a hole in her wallet.
“No, now.”
I sigh, spill out the rest of the story, including the fact that Chase or Darren are probably aliases. I tell her about the photos and young Broderick who LaLa never trusted. She takes it all in. Smiles when I say her aunt didn’t trust Broderick.
“Smart lady.”
“Yeah, she seemed really cool,” I agree.
“I want to meet her.”
“Of course. I’ll talk to Manny. She knows about you, but your mother never allowed her to contact you. I wonder what happened between them to make her break off like that?”
“Bradley?”
“Yes?”
“Thanks. I am shocked, of course, but you did something no one else has ever done for me. You gave me a family again. Now we just have to figure out Broderick’s game. And you have to talk to Viktor.”
Is she kidding? Now that he knows I’m the asshat, he’s probably going to beat the crap out of me.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Naomi. I’m probably the last person he wants to see.”
“But what if Broderick’s using him, too? He’s really good to me, but he isn’t the sharpest knife in the drawer. No offense.”
I laugh. If I hadn’t helped him study and with his homework, he would never have graduated. But he always was a true friend, and he would beat the living daylights out of anyone who tried to bully me.
“Alright, but enjoy this pretty face while you can. By tomorrow I will probably look more like a Picasso than a Vermeer.”
“Let’s get more sangria and some food. The smell is killing me.” She gets an evil glint in her eye. “Besides, this place looks expensive and Broderick isn’t anywhere near paying me back for all the shit he’s put me through.” She reaches into her bag and pulls out the platinum card, slapping it on the table.
I pick up my wine glass. “To Broderick,” I say, “may he burn in hell.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
An aunt away
NAOMI
Thursday, February17th
Bradley eats like he’s starving and I wonder if he misses all the specialty meals I used to make for him. He’s probably lost ten pounds since he moved out. I push the refilled basket of chips his way and smile, “I’m full, go ahead.”
He grins at me, an endearing curl of those full lips and after we finish, I see him feeling his pockets and I know he’s craving a smoke.
“Go ahead, Viktor smokes all the time. I gave up my crusade.”
Bradley lights up and I lean on my hands and just watch the smoke curl around his face, float into the wind, and dissipate. How much things have changed, everything but my wanting him. I’m afraid that’s never going to go away.
“LaLa, your aunt, said she always wanted to meet you.” Bradley puffs, watching me; probably afraid I’ll go all crazy and cry again.
“I would say, ‘how could my mother do such a thing,’ but it sounds just like her. She always threw the fact that it was her business, and her money, up to my dad. I bet she quarreled with her sister over money, the business, or some detail in their parents’ will. I’m sorry I never met my aunt, I missed out on a lot.”
“You’ve got time to know her.”
“I guess.” My mind wonders, do I have time? Can’t Bradley see how afraid I am? I blurt out, “I can’t go to the Bahama’s with Darren; he’ll force me into more things than just an engagement. He’s already stated how much he wants to ‘get it on’ with me.” I snort and lean my head back and look up at the sky.
“I never heard of this guy a few weeks ago, now he thinks he owns you?”
I wish Bradley was jealous, but he reads just annoyed. I tell him about Carl Swartz, the day I drank too much at lunch, and how Darren took me back to his penthouse for an overnight stay. How I quit my job and work for Broderick now, everything I can think of to get Bradley up to speed.
“I don’t give a damn about Darren, if you were wondering, not that you’d care, but I’m going to lose my job. I guess that will leave me open to selling out the loft, moving away.”
“What about Viktor? Aren’t you staying with him?”
“No…I, no.”
I shake myself. Stop whining. Bradley probably wishes he was with Luba and Natalia anywhere, having a fun threesome, instead of being stuck here with problem soaked me.
“I know Viktor cares for you Bradley. He’s been your friend for years. Don’t worry about him hitting you, not over me. We are just roomies, I don’t believe for a second he’s really serious about me. I’ll explain what really happened to him. I’ll tell Viktor I was the one in the wrong.”
Bradley finishes his cigarette, and looks towards the outgoing ferry loading. He’s anxious to be gone. I stand and wrap my coat around me.
He smiles and I hope he’s going to say something, only he just shrugs, and we start walking back towards the water.
He tells me my aunt’s address, describes her fabulous penthouse, and tells me the story about how Manny met her. That man, he’s the luckiest jerk in the world.
“Well, I guess that’s it.” I offer, letting Bradley off the hook.
“What? We haven’t figured out anything yet. This Chase, Darren thing, it’s not safe for you.”
“Maybe my aunt can fill in the missing pieces. It was nice of you to look into it for me Bradley. I know you’ve moved on, it’s okay.”
I wait. I gave him one last opportunity, what will he say? Nothing, everything?
I look up into his beautifu
l azure eyes and hope to see that old love reflecting back at me. I ache to see that special look from him again. The sun is down now, the clouds have rolled in, and all I can see is a handsome face staring off into open space.
I start walking and shrug my shoulder into the suddenly blistering cold wind.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Okay…?
BRADLEY
Thursday, February17th
Jesus women are complicated. First, Naomi throws me out, then she takes up with my best friend, then she asks for my help and now she’s pushing me away again? Before we even finish our coffees, she’s up and heading for the door. Telling me it’s okay if I’ve moved on. I try to reason with her, but she’s gone as cold as the wind swirling around the ferry dock. It’s late and I’m sure she’s tired, so I follow her, and we board. She sits inside; I go out to the railing and watch the water. There’s a plastic milk jug bobbing around in the chop and I realize that’s how I’ve been feeling. I used to be sure of everything, my career, Naomi, but now I just feel like an empty vessel, getting pushed back and forth. I feel exactly the way I did when I saw my mother handing Sabina the money for having sex with me: out of control of my own destiny. Maybe I should have shared that with Naomi. It might help her understand my insecurities, why I didn’t fight harder for her. But I can’t ever tell her. It’s too humiliating and I know she would never look at me the same way again.
I go back inside, sit next to Naomi on the bench. We sit in silence as the Statue of Liberty approaches. I look up into that solemn green face and something inside me cracks. Freedom. I have it, dammit. I am free to take back control of my life. What happened between Sabina and me was too long ago to still have a hold on me. I suddenly realize it wasn’t my fault. I didn’t do anything wrong and there was never anything wrong with me. It’s too late to get back all the years I wasted on feeling like I wasn’t worth someone else’s love, but it’s not too late to save this—us.
Bradley & Naomi, ...To Me & You (Vodka & Vice, the Series Book 2) Page 7
