“I’m a mess. I’m fucking married and I’m crying against your chest like a lovesick high school girl.”
“Hey, you’re married to an asshole. We didn’t ask to feel this way about each other, but we do and we both deserve to see where it takes us. You deserve to be happy, babe.”
“Can you just hold me a little bit longer?”
“I wouldn’t dream of letting you go.”
We spent the rest of the afternoon with her family before we all left to visit her dad. Now that he is out of intensive care, we are all able to go in at the same time. I put Harlee down on the floor and she burst through the door of his room and ran to him.
“PawPaw!” Climbing onto the bed, she wrapped her little arms around his neck and whispered, “I wuv you bigger!” His face lit up and he squeezed her tightly to his chest.
Ember walked to his bed and kissed his cheek, “You look great, daddy. How are you feeling?”
“Oh you know me, lightning bug. I always bounce back. I’m feeling pretty damn great, actually, and I am ready to be at home with my beautiful wife.” He looked at Claudel, Ember’s mom, and gave her a wink.
I stuck my hand out to shake his, “Sir, it’s good to see you again.”
“Call me Haywood, son. It’s good to see you again as well. I hear you’ve been takin great care of my girls.”
“I’ve been doing my best.”
“Good. That’s good. I appreciate it, son.”
We put cartoons on for Harlee and spent a couple hours telling stories and just enjoying being around one another. Tate started to fuss, so we said our goodbyes to Alex and Sidney. Alex told me to take good care of his baby sister or he was going to “whoop my ass six ways to Sunday.” That is a direct quote. I assured him I would work hard to make her happy.
After they left, Haywood turned to Ember and Claudel, “Ladies, would you give us just a minute. Dalton and I need to have a manly heart to heart.” The girls nodded. Ember winked at me, grabbed Harlee, and left the room. I’m fairly certain they took my strength with them because I suddenly felt extremely nervous.
“Son, I first want to thank you for taking care of my girls. They mean the world to me and I felt better knowin’ you were lookin’ after them while I’ve been laid up in here.”
“I didn’t have to do very much. They are all very strong.”
Haywood laughed and nodded his head, “You’re right about that. Very strong indeed, and stubborn as hell too. I’m pretty easy going, but Ember has a lot of her momma in her, which is why she is so damn stubborn.”
“You both raised a great woman. Both your children. Alex is great too.”
“Thank you, son. We worked hard to instill positive values into our kids. They both turned out pretty great. So, tell me what’s goin’ on with you and my lightning bug.”
My hands started to sweat and my heart was beating out of control. Haywood seemed to sense how nervous I had become, and he chuckled softly, “Boy, you’ve got no reason to be nervous. I see the way you look at her, and don’t think you’re hidin’ it from my wife either. She sees everything.”
What do I even say to that? Well you see, sir, although I basically just met Ember, I am falling madly in love with her. I know she’s married, but he’s a dick so I don’t feel like I’m stepping out of bounds at all. Fuck no I can’t tell him that. I decide to go for casual, “I really care about Ember. Harlee too.”
“I know you care about her. I can see how she feels about you, too. It’s written all over that pretty face of hers. Not to mention my grandbaby thinks the world of you and that’s sayin’ a lot, Peaches.”
The roar of his laughter instantly relaxed me. This man has worked his ass off his entire life to provide for his family. Ember told me stories of him sitting on the porch with a shotgun and scaring the shit out of her dates when they came to pick her up. He is a tough man, but he sure has a heart of gold. I can see why Ember thinks the world of him. He’s a lot like my Dad.
“I love Harlee. She is an amazing little girl.”
“You love her momma too, don’t you son?”
And the nerves are back. I know I’m falling for Ember, hard, but do I love her already? What am I saying? Of course I do. Every moment I’m with her just intensifies my feelings. I had never admitted it to myself, and it’s way too early to admit it to her, but hell yes I love her.
Haywood placed his hand on mine and gave it a firm squeeze, “Your face says it all, son. I know you love her, but you promise me something.” I nodded and he continued, “You take care of my little girl. I know she keeps a lot from us, but Harper called before the accident and filled me in on a lot of it. If I wasn’t stuck in this hospital bed, I would have put a bullet through Austin by now. When Claudel would head home at night, I would cry myself to sleep thinking of how I failed my daughter. I never knew anything about what was going on at home. Shouldn’t a father know?”
“Don’t blame yourself. She hid it from everyone. Harper is the only person she ever told and I found out on my own and then she finally told me what was going on.”
“She deserves to be happy and to feel safe, Dalton. Can you do that?”
“I can do that and more.”
Haywood sat up in bed and held out his arms. He embraced me like we had known each other for years. After saying our goodbyes, the girls came back in and I gave Ember and Harlee some alone time while I went into the waiting room and replayed our entire conversation over and over again. I hate that he feels so helpless and that he blames himself for not knowing about the abuse. How could he have known though? If they lived close and he could see Ember often, then he would have figured it out, but there just isn’t any way to know when you live apart.
I have just under three weeks to spend as much time as I can with Ember. It won’t be easy. We have a lot of pre deployment work to do, plus Ember will be back to work on Monday night. Blake will be here in less than two weeks and I have to get him settled in before I ship out. What shitty timing for all of this. At least I get to spend time with Harlee and Ember tomorrow, even if we are just sitting in my truck.
As I let my mind wander some more, my phone beeps, signaling a text message.
Austin: Bates, you better bring your A-game Monday, man. We’ve got so much shit to do. Did you tell Ember?
Me: I always bring my A-game. Harper told her before I could. I wanted to wait until the ride home, but that didn’t happen.
Austin: Wait for what, bro?
Me: She’s had a shitty week and her dad woke up the day you told me. I couldn’t ruin her happiness by adding this shit to it.
Austin: You’re a fucking pussy, Bates. When did you lose your balls?
He thinks I’m a pussy? He’s the piece of shit who beats the most amazing woman I have ever met. The woman that he should be thanking God for every single day. Unbelievable.
Me: I’m not a fucking pussy. I just care enough to not want to hurt her feelings.
Austin: Whatever dude. At least she knows. Enjoy the long ass drive back. See ya Monday.
I didn’t respond. He isn’t worth it. As I shove my phone back into my pocket, Ember walks into the waiting room with Harlee and Claudel in tow. “You kid’s go home and relax. I’ll be there shortly.” We hug her mom and head back to the house.
We’ve been back in Georgia for two weeks. Since leaving Alabama, my life has been a mix of hectic and wonderful. Harper watched Harlee the first few nights I went back to work, but when I picked up an extra shift that Friday and Harlee had to stay at daycare, all hell broke loose.
She’s been going to this daycare for a long time. It’s the only one around here that is open 24:7, but they hired a new night crew and she was having such a hard time adjusting to being back. Two hours into my shift, they called me in a panic saying she wouldn’t stop crying. They said she was yelling for me, and when she started yelling for peaches, they tried to feed her some and it only made it worse. I told them that she didn’t want the food, she wanted her f
riend Peaches. It broke my heart, but I couldn’t leave the hospital.
I knew Austin would be too drunk to be of any help, so I called Dalton. That man got out of bed, drove to the daycare, and took Harlee home with him. He said that as soon as he put her into bed, she passed out. It warmed my heart that he was so willing to jump out of bed and pick my baby up.
We tried daycare again and she said she wanted Peaches to watch her, so between Harper and Dalton, they have been taking turns keeping Harlee while I work. Dalton has been taking most of the shifts because he wants to spend as much time as he can with her before he leaves. Austin was more than fine with Dalton keeping Harlee while I work. He even dropped her off one night when I was called in an hour early. I don’t even try to understand him; there is no point.
Dalton’s best friend, Blake, moved in with him. Harlee calls him “Unkey Bake.” She can’t say uncle and cannot seem to get the “L” in anyone’s name, but those two men are wrapped around her little finger. Plus, Blake has a military dog that she loves to play with.
Austin has been working late every night, well, he says he is working, but I assume he is with Malibu Barbie. I haven’t cared enough to ask.
Dalton and I have managed to get trail runs in a few times a week. It’s the only alone time we get and I savor every moment. The guys ship out at the end of the week and I’m starting to panic. I’m glad that Austin is leaving, sad that Dalton has to go, and stressed about who will watch Harlee and how I am going to be available to offer support for the other wives/girlfriends when I already have so much on my plate. I know I can do this. I am a fucking warrior.
I have an FRG meeting tonight. I was planning to take Harlee along, but Dalton asked if he could watch her. Harper met me at my house and after dropping Harlee off with Dalton, we headed to our meeting. All the wives or girlfriends will be there since this is our last meeting before the guys leave. We have so many new faces and I need to make sure everyone is put on a support team before they are left alone for the next eight months.
“What’s on the schedule for tonight?”
“Too damn much. We have so many new girls, Harp. It’s going to be a long night. How are you handling everything?”
Harper’s two older brothers are in the service, so she is familiar with deployments. It’s different when you’re actually dating the guy who’s leaving though. Harper is strong and I know she will be able to handle it, plus we have each other. We have been best friends since childhood, and I am so glad she decided to move out here when we did. I would be lost without her.
“I won’t lie, I’m sad, but I’ll get through it. I guess I worry that he will lose interest in me while he’s gone.”
“Harper Grace Johnson, you know better than to think like that. Trent is head over combat boots in love with you. Sure you haven’t dated long, but you two have liked each other for years. He will call, you can Skype, plus think of all the letters and care packages you get to send him. We have a lot of jar cakes to bake, girlfriend.”
“You’re right. I’m a little emotional these days. I hate being a girl sometimes. Our hormones are so fucked up and… Oh hell.”
“What? What did I miss?” I looked over at Harper who was deep in thought. She pulled up her phone and was frantically searching for something.
“It’s not what you missed, Ember. It’s what I missed.”
Huh? “Huh?” I looked at her in confusion for a few moments before it sank in, “Oh. My. God! How late is your period, Harp?”
“Two… weeks.”
“Holy hell, dude. You’re just now realizing this?”
Harper started crying and buried her face in her hands, “What am I going to do? He’s leaving, and what if he doesn’t want a baby, or me?”
“Slow down, Harp. When we finish the meeting we are going to go buy a test, okay? No jumping to conclusions until we know for sure. If you are, I have no doubts that Trent will be excited. Have you not seen how amazing he is with Harlee? He’s a natural.”
“You’re right. We need to focus on the meeting and I’ll wait to freak out again until later.”
We pull into the parking lot and head inside. We instantly spot Sara and Connie who were busy setting out snacks. “Hey, loves!”
Sara gave me a big hug and eyed me up and down, “You look extra adorable tonight. Hot date?”
Laughing, I reply, “Girl, you know better than that.”
Like myself, Sara and Connie are seasoned Army wives. They have both been through countless deployments and are amazing support leaders. When one of us is having a hard time, we are always there to pick each other up and we are always willing to help a fellow wife or girlfriend in need. I couldn’t ask for a better team.
“I think I went a little overboard on the desserts.” I turned to Connie and laughed as she set out twenty flavors of cookies on the cart table.
“Um, ya think? I must say, your coping mechanism for handling stress is very beneficial to me.”
I grabbed a cookie, held it up to her, and smiled. When Connie is stressed out, she bakes. I try to be around her during those times so I can eat copious amounts of yummy desserts.
“Hey Sara, why can’t you have a coping mechanism like Connie does? Like, maybe you could start making casseroles when you’re stressed. I would appreciate it.” We all started laughing as the women poured in for the meeting.
Once everyone was loaded up with snacks and in their seats, I began with my pre deployment spiel. “Thank you all for coming. I know how stressful things can get, but please know that you can pick up the phone and call any of us, day or night, and we will be there to help you with anything you need. A lot of you are seasoned pros, and a lot of you are about to go through everything for the first time, but know that you are not alone. The guys signed up for this life and we committed ourselves to them. When you love a military man, you have to take everything that comes with it. Every single one of you is strong and you will get through this.”
After talking until I was winded, we made ourselves available for questions and assigned the new women to their support team. Since there are so many of us, it’s easier to have a couple of teams, but we will all come together to help each other regardless.
I encouraged the girls to write a few different letters for the guys to take with them. One for when they are on the plane, one for when they are missing their wife or girlfriend, one from their children if they have any, and so on. It’s just nice for the guys to have something they can open right away, because it takes forever to send mail.
After the meeting, Harper and I head to the store.
“There are too many to choose from. Why are there so damn many?”
“Deep breath, Harp.” Grabbing a box and handing it to her I said, “This is the one I used when I found out I was pregnant with Harlee.”
“Oh God. Is this really happening?”
“Yup, and we are going to see what it says as soon as we get to Dalton’s house.”
The ride to Dalton’s was filled with silence. Harper stared out the window as she bounced her leg, a nervous habit she has had since we were teenagers. Once we pulled into the driveway and made our way inside, Harper excused herself to use the bathroom.
“Hello beautiful.” Dalton said as he kissed my forehead.
“Hi handsome. How were things?”
Blake came around the corner and replied before Dalton could, “We fed her chocolate and cotton candy. She is completely insane now. You’re welcome.”
Giving him a stern look I said, “You better not have, ‘Unkey Bake’, otherwise you’re staying up with her tonight.
The guys laughed at me as Harper yelled from the bathroom, “Holy shit! Holy shit balls!”
The guys started toward the bathroom, but I cut them off. “Yoooou, don’t want to go in there.”
“What? She just yelled obscenities from my bathroom, Ember. Something is obviously wrong. If Blake and I can’t go in, then you need to.”
“She’s going t
o be okay, Batman. You’ll find out what’s wrong as soon as she comes out.”
Dalton looked at me as if I was insane and Blake just sat down quietly on the barstool. Moments later Harper walked out with an emotionless expression on her face. Dalton put his arm around her shoulder and smiled hesitantly at her. “What the hell happened, Harper?”
Harper reached into her back pocket and handed the test to Dalton. Examining it he said, “Is this… did you pee on this?”
Giving him a grumpy look, Harper said, “Clearly I pissed on it, Dalton.”
He sheepishly looked at me before looking back at the test. When he looked at the results, he set it down and pulled Harper into his arms, “You know Trent talks all the time about how he can’t wait to have a family of his own. Is that what you’re worried about?”
Pulling out of his hold, she smiled, “Does he really say that?”
“I wouldn’t lie to you, Harper. Make sure you tell him right away so he has a few days to let it sink in before we ship out, yeah?”
It was finally my turn to chime in, “Eek! I am so excited to be an Auntie again!” Tate is my only nephew, and I don’t have any nieces. Since Harper is like a sister to me, I will be the baby’s aunt, “Auntie Em,” just like she is “Auntie Harp” to Harlee.
“How did this happen? I’m…pregnant!”
Blake stood up from the barstool and took a step toward Harper, “See, when a man and a woman get naked and the guy sticks his cock…”
“I know how I got pregnant, asshole. My birth control failed. I just can’t believe it. I need to go to Trent’s house.”
Harper picked up the phone and dialed Trent. After telling him they needed to talk, she asked if I could drop her off at his house. I wanted to stay a little longer and spend time with Dalton, but Harper needs me. As I was gathering up Harlee’s toys, Dalton’s phone chimed.
He smiled and shook his head as he read the message and then handed the phone to me. It was from Trent.
Trent: When a woman says “we need to talk”, that’s bad right? Fuck dude. Have you heard anything? Is Harper mad at me?
Ember Skies Page 12
