With reluctance, I took a shaky step back. “See you tomorrow?”
“Definitely.” He gave my hands a final squeeze before turning to walk back to his car. I waited until he pulled away from the curb before going into the house.
I ran up the stairs and flung myself on top of my bed. I could still taste him on my lips, smell him on my skin. I replayed the kiss over and over through my mind. Man, that boy could kiss!
I rolled onto my side, curling around a pillow. So, what did it mean? I now knew for sure that Bryan liked me, but how is it I really felt about him? Did I want a boyfriend? I kind of liked not being one of those girls who spent their entire high school years obsessing over some boy. It just seemed too exhausting. But Bryan was different, wasn’t he? When I was with him, things felt easier somehow. His calming presence soothed the stress of my life.
A short vibration in my pocket alerted me to a text message. I reached for my phone and checked the screen. The message was from Bryan and it read, “THAT WAS FREAKING AMAZING!”
Yes, it was.
Chapter 20
I took my car to school the next day, so I could go straight to the animal shelter after classes ended. When I pulled in, I spotted Shawn leaning against his car, fiddling with his iPhone. Only he could pull off plaid pants and make them look stylish.
“Die, Pigs!” he grunted through clenched teeth as I approached.
“Playing Angry Birds again?” I asked.
He glanced up at me and gave me a half smile before turning his attention back to his game. “Yeah…it’s addictive.”
“Well, put it away. The bell is going to ring in like three minutes.”
“Fine,” he grumbled, locking his phone and shoving it into his back pants pocket. “I called you last night, but you didn’t answer your cell.”
“Yeah,” I said, as we walked toward the building, “The ringer set on vibrate, so by the time I noticed you called I was getting ready for bed. Did you need anything important?”
“Not really...just wanted to ask you about Bryan.”
“What about him?” I asked, trying to project casual disinterest while my insides turned to spaghetti at the mention of his name.
“Well, yesterday at lunch…he looked kinda into you.”
“Did he?” I asked, unable to keep the grin off my face.
Shawn laughed and shucked my arm. “Aw, man! You do have the hots for him!”
“Shut up,” I replied, giving him a little shove.
“Well, you do right?”
“I guess…”
“Cady’s got a boyfriend…” he teased, but only loud enough for me to hear. “Seriously, I think it’s cool that you’re finally interested in someone around here. He seems like a cool guy. Those eyes are to die for.”
“I know, right? His lips are even better.”
“Girl, you’ve been holding out on me! You have to call me tonight and tell me everything.”
Inside the doors, Shawn and I headed our separate ways with promises to see each other at lunch.
I floated through the hall with a smile on my face. It was crazy how good I felt for someone who had tossed and turned the whole night before. The memory of that fiery kiss and the emotions that came with it played on a continuous loop through my mind all night long. It was the best I’d felt in weeks, and I didn’t want to let it go.
I was so caught up in my thoughts, it wasn’t until Mr. Steele was well into his lecture that I began to notice emotions in the classroom besides mine. They seemed to swirl around me in a steady hum. If my range really was about ten feet, I figured over half of the students and Mr. Steele would fall within it. I struggled to keep my body relaxed and mind open. The only way to get a handle over this empathy thing was to understand it.
My eyes drifted closed so I could concentrate on identifying the different emotions around me. A sluggish feeling seemed to dominate. Tiredness? That would make sense given that it was first hour. It could also be boredom. There was a wave of excitement coming from somewhere…behind me? Yes, I could sense the direction. I snuck a glance over my shoulder and saw Sarah Dobbs staring at the clock, her fingers drumming the cover of her textbook. Yes, the excitement was definitely coming from her.
My thoughts were interrupted by Mr. Steele passing something out, and I realized with horror that we were having a quiz. Crap! I might be back to school physically and making an effort to keep up on my homework, but I hadn’t been paying much attention in class.
My panic must have shown on my face, because when Mr. Steele set the paper down on my desk he said, “Just try your best.”
A ball of worry sat in my stomach, this time I was fairly sure it was my own and not my classmates doing it to me.
When I flipped the quiz over, I scanned the questions. The whole thing was short answer. Oh, come on! No multiple choice? At least then I would’ve been able to guess at the answers. I groaned loud enough that the boy in front of me, Ben…something, turned and looked at me. I glared at him and read the first question to myself.
What are the three branches of the U.S. government? Well, that one was easy. I wrote, “Judicial, Executive & Legislative.” Maybe this test wouldn’t be so hard after all.
How many years make up a term for Senators? I didn’t know. I jotted down four years, since I know that’s how long Presidents are elected for.
How many members make up the House of Representatives? I don’t flippin’ know! I left it blank.
By the time the bell rang and students began piling their completed quizzes on the corner of Mr. Steele’s desk on their way out, over half of my page was still blank. Oh, well. I slapped the paper on the desk and hurried out of the classroom. I was so lost in my own thoughts I almost ran into Bryan, who was waiting for me outside the door.
“Whoa, there!” he said laughing. “You looked like you’ve been chewing on glass. What’s up?”
“We had a quiz, and I’m fairly sure I bombed.” We strolled down the hall toward my locker. “I just don’t get what’s happening with me and school. I mean I used to study really hard and get good grades, but now,” I sighed, “I just don’t care anymore.”
Bryan nodded and put his arm out to keep me from getting jostled by two boys who were play-fighting in front of us. “You’re probably still feeling lost from missing so much school. Have your parents talked to your teachers about how you’re going to deal with the work you’ve missed?”
“I don’t think our parents have even noticed that Aaron and I have gone back to school yet. Besides, I caught up on my missed work. It’s the problems concentrating in class that is getting to me.”
When we got to my locker, I spun the combination and switched out my books. There were still bits of tape stuck to Lony’s from where I’d ripped the pictures down. I closed the metal door and glanced up at Bryan, leaning next to me with a lazy grin on his face. All of my tension melted away.
Bryan reached out and picked up a lock of my hair, twisting it between his fingers. “You have the softest hair I’ve ever felt.”
“Um...” I wanted to compliment him back, but wasn’t sure what to say. Gee, I really think you’re hot, just didn’t seem right. “…thanks.”
There was a strange expression on his face…like he wanted to tell me something, but couldn’t get the words out. I concentrated on the emotion vibes he was sending out. It was tough to isolate him in the sea of students around us, but when I took his hand in mine, it was like all of the conflicting waves cut off and I was perfectly in tune with him. Touching him seemed to block out the feelings of the students around us, so that his emotions commanded my full attention. What didn’t make sense was the strange tension I was picking up from him.
“Is something wrong?” I asked.
His eyes widened as if startled out of some deep thought. “Uh, I need to talk to you about something.”
“Okay.” Oh, no! He regrets kissing me! “What is it?”
He glanced around at the thinning crowd. “No
t now. We have to get to class. Want to go get some coffee or something after school?”
“Sure.” I didn’t know if I could wait that long. “Just tell me this one thing or I’ll obsess over it all day…are you going to tell me that kissing me was a mistake?”
One side of his mouth curled up into a grin. “Are you kidding? Kissing you was the most fun I’ve had all year.” To prove it, he leaned down and gave me a soft, lingering peck on the mouth, sending my pulse into a stampede. “I just have to explain something to you. It’s not that big of a deal, really.”
“Okay. I won’t worry about it then. See you at lunch?”
“Yeah,” he replied, giving my hand a squeeze before dropping it.
We headed off in different directions, me walking on clouds the whole way to second period, my botched quiz long forgotten.
As I stood at the cafeteria salad bar trying to decide between limp romaine and limp spinach, Bronwyn approached with a playful glare on her face.
“So,” she said, “when were you going to tell me you and Bryan are dating? I’m your best friend, and I had to hear it from the gossip chain?”
“We’re not dating…exactly. That is…I don’t know what you call it.” I decided on limp spinach, but drowned it in ranch dressing.
“But the two of you were making out against your locker today?”
My head snapped up in surprise. “We weren’t making out! We barely kissed!”
She chuckled at my reaction.
“I can’t believe you even heard about that. Dang. I don’t know why the school invests in an intercom system when all they have to do is send the morning announcements out through the grapevine.”
She laughed and the florescent lights glinted off of her retainer wire. “So it’s true? That’s so cool! How long has this been going on?”
At that moment, I honestly don’t think anything could have wiped the smile off my face. “Oh, Bronwyn! He’s so incredible!” As we stood in line at the check-out, I filled her in. “We had our first official date last night, but you know we’ve been talking for a few weeks now. And when he dropped me off, he gave me this good-night kiss that was so hot, it practically peeled the paint off the front door.”
Bronwyn stared off dreamily. “Sounds wonderful!”
“It was! But you know, I’m not exactly sure what this means. I mean, it’s not like he asked me to be his girlfriend or anything. I just don’t know where it stands right now.”
“But you are going to go out with him again, right?”
“That will be $4.15,” the lunch lady sporting a hair helmet said as she weighed my salad. I handed over exact change, and we made our way to our usual table in the back.
“Of course, I’ll go out with him again. In fact, he asked me to have coffee with him after school today. It will have to be fast though. I’m working at the shelter this afternoon.”
When we got to our table, Shawn was already there with Angelique Rasmusson, a senior girl who hangs out with him once in a while. I don’t know her all that well, but she’s in the drama club with Shawn.
“Hi, Ang,” I said as we sat down. I made sure to keep the spot next to me open for Bryan. “What’s up?”
“Bonjour,” she replied. Angelique has this whole French thing going on. She dresses like Audrey Hepburn and smokes unfiltered cigarettes. “Colin and I broke up, so Shawn agreed to stand in as my Homecoming date. We’re trying to figure out what to wear. I want to do a whole 1940’s theme. What do you think?”
“Oh, that’s this weekend?” A little knot formed in my gut. If Lony had been alive, she would’ve been talking about the dance non-stop.
“Yeah,” Angelique replied. “It’s kinda last minute, so we have to hit the stores after school today. There’s this really chic vintage place down in the Cable Car Square that I want to check out.”
With a model perfect body like Angelique’s —rail thin with legs that went on for miles —she could wear a trash bag and make it look like something off the cover of Vogue. “I’m sure you’ll find something.”
A warm hand touched my shoulder. I looked up to see Bryan beaming at me. He set his tray down next to mine. On it was a plate with a pile of overcooked spaghetti.
“Hey,” he said in a general greeting to the table as he slid in next to me. Shawn flashed me a knowing grin and my cheeks pinkened.
“Hi, Bryan,” Bronwyn replied. She quickly introduced him to Angelique.
Angelique tucked a lock of her short dark bob behind her ear, drawing attention to her long graceful neck and gave him a smile that managed both flirty and pouty at the same time. “Hello,” she said, “I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before. I would have remembered.”
I ground my teeth together. Do guys really go for such obvious flirts? Yes, actually, they do.
Not Bryan though. As he said, “Nice to meet you,” he gave my shoulder a light squeeze, giving the not so subtle hint that he was already taken. I warmed at the brief touch. Angelique’s stupid grin faded and she turned her attention back to Shawn.
“So, are you going to be able to get your dad’s car, or will I have to drive us?” she asked Shawn.
“I’ll ask,” he replied gulping a big swig of milk from the carton. “I’ve had my license for a month already and he’s still afraid to let me drive.”
I don’t think I blamed Mr. Cole for not wanting Shawn to go off alone in his Lexus. Let’s just say that Shawn passing his driving test must be proof of divine intervention.
A couple of senior girls called out Angelique’s name and waved her over. “I have to run. Meet me by my locker after seventh period,” she said to Shawn before rushing off.
“So you’re taking Angelique to Homecoming?” Bronwyn asked. “What happened to Carlos?”
Carlos Espinoza was a really cute senior that Shawn had been “talking to” for a while.
Shawn rolled his eyes. “Who knows? One minute he acts interested and the next he avoids me like the flu.”
“He’s a jerk,” I said.
Shawn sighs. “No. No, he really isn’t. It’s just that he’s closeted with his family still. How they can’t tell is beyond me! That queen can set off gaydar alarms ten blocks away.”
“Sometimes parents don’t really want to see their kids for who they really are,” Bryan said, twirling his fork to roll the long noodles up into a bite-sized nest.
“I know mine don’t,” Bronwyn agreed. “My parents still think I’m ten years old.”
I smirked, remembering the dollhouse Bronwyn received for her fifteenth birthday. The miniature hand-carved furniture pieces were cool and everything, but what was she supposed to do, play with it? It’d been taking up a whole corner of her bedroom ever since.
“So,” Shawn said, obviously wanting to change the subject, “you two are going to Homecoming, right? If my dad won’t let me have the car, maybe we can double together.”
A shot of fear hit my chest like a bolt, and I realized it was coming from Bryan, whose knee was resting against mine. I glanced up to see a him biting his lip and looking pale. What was the big deal? Why didn’t he just tell Shawn that he hadn’t had a chance to ask me? It’s not like I wanted to go anyway. I’d rather have him come over to watch a DVD or something.
“Um…well…” Bryan hedged. “I’m going…but not with Cady.”
I felt like the bench I was sitting on dropped out from under me, sending me into free fall. A pained look crossed his face as he tried to explain to me, but his words made no sense. Girlfriend? Flying in from Portland? Planned months ago?
My belly roiled and the smell of the ranch dressing was making me want to hurl. I mumbled an excuse and left the table, dropping my lunch —tray and all —into the garbage can.
I burst through the bathroom door, nearly hitting some girl in my rush to get to a stall where I locked myself in and sat down hard on the seat. What in the hell just happened? I asked myself, hot tears dripping onto my lap. How could I be so stupid? Here I thought B
ryan was this great guy, but really he’d been playing me. He has a girlfriend back in Portland? Don’t you think he could have told me that before ramming his tongue down my throat? I sobbed silently, feeling my life slide back down into the shit-pile it had been ever since my sister died. Maybe this was karma’s way of biting me back for trying to be happy before my sister was even cold in the ground.
When I heard Bronwyn come in asking if anyone had seen me, I tucked my feel up out of sight until she left. Girls came and went from the bathroom through the rest of the lunch hour. I knew there was a line waiting to use the toilets —I could sense their impatience —but I refused to vacate my stall. The bell rang indicating the end of lunch. Five minutes later it rang again signaling the start of sixth period. I was alone at last.
I wadded up a bunch of toilet paper and wiped at my face. I dropped it in the bowl and flushed. As I left the stall, I met my gaze in the mirror, cringing at the sight of my red-blotchy face under the harsh florescent lights. No way was I going back to class.
Leaving the bathroom, I walked to my locker to get my backpack from where I’d stashed it before lunch. On my way out of the school, I passed Ms. Schilton, my freshman English teacher. She opened her mouth as if to ask for my hall-pass, but something in my expression must have warned her to back off.
When I got in my car, I turned the ignition and let the engine idle. Where would I go? It was too early to go to the shelter. I didn’t have to be there until four. No way was I going home. A note from my mother left on the kitchen table this morning told me that the cleaning lady was coming in, and I should gather up my laundry. The last thing I wanted was to have my pity party interrupted by some stranger vacuuming my bedroom.
I put the car in gear and drove out of the lot. Without really thinking about it, I found myself pulling up in front of Jinx’s house. As I walked up her sidewalk, she opened the door for me.
“Must’ve heard me coming, huh?” I said with a forced, humorless laugh.
Arcadia's Gift (Arcadia Trilogy) Page 13
