Resting my hand on her arm, I give it a gentle squeeze. I love Anna, always have. But I think I just fell for her a little harder, right here in the middle of the church fellowship hall… surrounded by balloons and crepe paper. “It’s okay,” I soothe. “It just wasn’t meant to be.” Swallowing down my own emotions, I take a second to be sad.
It’s my right.
Through my anger management sessions, I’ve learned I'm allowed to feel any emotion I want. It’s what I do about them that makes the difference.
But what I told her is the same thing I’ve been telling myself the past few weeks… or more like the past six months. As much as I didn’t want to acknowledge it, I know it’s true: Asher and I weren’t meant to be.
I loved him, that’s true. And if he hadn’t cheated on me, I’d still be married to him. But what I’ve realized is that everything happens for a reason. It might take a while, but eventually things get clearer. One day, I’ll be able to look back and see how one thing led to another and another… until I’m happy again.
Actually, I’m already getting there.
“You’re right.” Anna sniffles and turns her bright smile toward me. “I’d been praying for Asher to have a change of heart and for the two of you to reconcile, but I’m done with that.”
Now I’m the one to roll my eyes, because she sounds just like my mama.
“I’m going to be praying you find a new husband… someone good and Godly, of course,” she says thoughtfully. “With good swimmers.”
“Good Lord,” I groan, leaning my head back and looking toward to the ceiling, searching for a way out of this madness.
“He is good,” she muses. Again, sounding just like my mama. “You’re a big hit in my prayer circle, you know. So I guess it’s a good thing you’re set on keeping us busy on our knees.”
My mouth is hanging open as I stare at her, not believing what just came out of her mouth. Anna never makes off-colored jokes or gives sexual innuendos, so you can imagine my shock as I sit there. I’m doubly shocked when she quirks an eyebrow at me, daring me for a response.
“Obviously, I need as many prayers as possible,” I tell her, refusing to fall for her tricks. “Who am I to deprive you and your nosy friends from your true calling?”
My semi-acquiescence catches her off-guard, which is exactly what I was going for. Anna eventually smiles, slipping an arm around my shoulders and hugging me to her as she laughs. “I love you, you big ol’ heathen.”
“I love you, too, you Amazonian holy roller.”
After everyone has had their cake, punch, and mingle time, Anna takes her place in the designated chair, ready to receive gifts. Of course, I draw the short straw and have to sit next to her, writing down who gives her what so she can personalize thank-you cards later.
Everything is going just peachy. I’m avoiding Mindy’s stares and Anna is getting some adorable gifts, when a loud gasp gets my attention.
Turning to Anna, I see her big blue eyes are as round as saucers. With her mouth hanging open, like she’s shocked or surprised, I look around for some audacious gift, but see nothing out of the ordinary—diapers, bibs, and bottles.
Then, I see the panic. With a fake smile frozen on her face, she speaks to me, slowly but deliberately, through her clenched teeth. “Tempest, I think I just tee-teed on myself.”
Giggles bubble out of my mouth before I can stop them. “What?”
“Tee-tee. You know…pee.” She rolls her eyes before admitting, exasperated, “I just peed myself, Tempest!” She implores me with a desperate look to understand.
“What would you like me to do?” I ask, setting the notepad I’ve been writing on down on the table. “Do you want me to walk you to the bathroom and block everyone from seeing your wet dress?” She’s twice my size, but I could at least cover her ass while she walks.
“I don’t know!” She’s starting to lose it. I see it all over her face and I desperately search the crowd of women for my mama. She always has a solution for any problem. “Maybe I should stay here until everyone leaves…” she drifts off as her eyes go to the floor, taking mine with them.
“Um, Anna, I don’t think that’s pee.”
“What do you mean? Of course it is. What else could it be?”
I answer her by discreetly pointing to the pink liquid running down her leg.
“No, Tempest, just…no.” She starts to stand, but then her hand goes to her belly and I think she’s having a contraction. “My… my water cannot break during my baby shower... at church. This is not in my birth plan!”
“Uh, sweetie,” I tell her as calmly as possible, “I really don’t think that’s up to you. I’ll go call Cole and the hospital to let them know you’re on your way.”
A throat clears next to me. “Girls, is everything okay? I don’t want to be pushy, but everyone is waiting for your private conversation to end so Anna can finish opening her presents.” The Lord really is listening… He knows I needed my mama.
“Mama, her water broke… the shower is officially over.”
Thankfully, her alarmed expression morphs to one of calmness before she turns and begins addressing everyone. “Ladies, I’m afraid Anna will have to open her remaining gifts later. It appears as though Baby Cassidy will be joining us soon, so if you’ll please excuse us, we need to get to the hospital.”
A mild hysteria hits as the women jump into action, squealing in excitement and offering to help, just as Anna has her next contraction.
“Son of a bitch, that hurt!” Every eye in the room flies to Anna, bringing the room to an absolute halt. Anna doesn’t show any signs of embarrassment as she continues. “Oh, don’t look at me like that. You know this hurts… why didn’t any of you warn me about this?” Her question is followed up by an anguished cry and Anna Cassidy has officially lost all decorum.
Anna’s mother takes over by escorting her daughter outside to her car while I call Cole and tell him to meet us at the hospital. After the shock of Anna’s outburst wears off, the guests begin cleaning up the room and packing the gifts for me to take.
As I’m loading up the last gift bag into the truck, I see Mindy waddle out of the church and notice Asher’s truck parked in the front. When he hops out to help her in, I stand there, watching. I’m waiting for the longing to kick in… sadness, desire… but nothing.
When he looks my way, I give him a smile… not a friendly one or an I-miss-you smile, but a knowing smile. One that says I know… and you don’t win, because congratulations, Asher, you’re stuck with her for at least the next eighteen years.
I can see his jaw muscles tense before he gives me a fake smile and an awkward nod of his head as he rounds the truck and climbs inside. When they drive away, I swear I feel Mindy’s glare until they’ve turned out on the main highway.
On my way to the hospital, I think about calling Cage and letting him know Anna is in labor and I won’t be by for our Sunday kickboxing session, but I don’t have his phone number. So instead, I call the Pink Pony and leave a message for him with Floyd.
“There you are!” Cole says as he rounds the corner of the tiny hospital waiting room. “I thought you deserted me.” The look on his face is pure panic. His skin is a little pale, and there’s a bead of sweat rolling down his forehead. He’s a mess.
“Are you okay?” Normally, Cole is the calm one, always having every situation under control.
“Uh, yeah. Anna’s a little, uh . . . How do I put this?” He paces back and forth as he rests his hands on his gun belt. “Well, she’s already threatened to kill me twice, and my balls have been threatened repeatedly. She’s so scary,” he whispers.
“It’s gonna be alright,” I tell him, putting an arm around his shoulder and pulling him into a two-person huddle. We’ve always been a team and that doesn’t stop today. “Here’s the game plan. You and I will take shifts. It’s gonna take a team effort, but I think we’ll make it, if we stick together.”
“Sounds good,” he agrees, looki
ng relieved I’m not abandoning him in his time of need. “Thanks for being here.”
* * *
Unfortunately for us... and Anna, she labors long and hard for the remainder of the day, but between me and Cole, all she has to do is ask and it’s hers—water, ice chips, cold rags, her bible, a hand to hold, someone to yell at. The grandmas-to-be left to go to Anna and Cole’s house and wash all of the new baby clothes and make sure the nursery is ready for the baby.
Cowards.
Around midnight, Anna finally makes it to ten centimeters, and the doctor comes in to clear the room so she can start pushing. As I’m making my way out the door, Anna yells at me to come back.
“You can’t leave me now!” Her voice is desperate, and her eyes are pleading.
“You’ve got Cole, Anna. He’s not going anywhere,” I soothe, wiping her forehead with a cool cloth, trying to talk some sense into her, because she’s obviously out of her mind… I’m not staying in here. As much as I want a baby of my own, I don’t think I’m ready to watch one be born. Ignorance is bliss… right?
“Yeah, but he’s a jackass, and I need you! Please stay with me!” she begs, tears forming in her eyes.
Damn tears!
“OK, I’ll stay. I’ll stay.” I pat her arm and try to calm the full-on panic attack that’s going on inside me. Holy shit! No, no, no. Getting ice chips is one thing, but I can’t watch this! I can’t watch them pull a coconut through a hole the size of a pea!
As Anna starts to push, she squeezes the shit out of my hand. I look across at Cole. He’s so white he’s starting to blend into the wall behind him, and his eyes are glazed over.
I know this look. I saw it once in the woods when I cut my leg on a big stick. There was so much blood and he nearly passed out on me.
“He’s going down!” I yell out, just in time for the nurse to push a chair under him before he hits the ground.
“Cole! You big wuss! Ahhhhhhhh,” Anna screams as she pushes through a hard contraction. “I’m the one pushing a baby out of my vagina, and you’re passing out?”
“Thi—this is why I needed you to stay. I knew he wouldn’t be able to handle it,” Anna pants.
I can’t help but laugh at the chaos around me—Cole trying to stay with us, Anna screaming as she pushes—but the second she bears down for the final push, everything seems to stand still.
The wail of a baby fills the room and a nurse quickly wipes him off, swaddles him, and lays him on Anna’s chest.
I take this as my cue to make my exit. Cole gives me a confident smile when I look over at him before he takes the scissors from the nurse and cuts the umbilical cord. I lean over and kiss Anna’s head, telling her “congratulations” and get a good look at Cole, Jr. Well, his name is Matthew, but I can already tell he looks just like his daddy.
Walking out into the hall, I slowly slide down the wall and sit on the floor.
Damn, that was intense.
Looking at my phone, I see the time and it’s time for me to head to the bakery to make some muffins.
I’m thinking an espresso-infused triple chocolate with a cherry filling… Back in Baby’s Arms.
Chapter 16
Cage
The bell over the front door to the studio rings and my mouth instinctively begins to water. It’s not only because of the Pavlovian response I seem to have now when Tempest walks through the door but also, because of the delicious aroma that enters with her.
My payment.
My very own specially made muffins from the Duchess of Muffins herself.
I’m trying really hard to remain casual, so I glance at the entryway over my shoulder and try not to swallow my tongue.
Delicious. Both the muffins and their maker. I mean, I can only assume Tempest tastes as amazing as her muffins because I haven’t had the pleasure. Yet.
Shit. It’s getting harder and harder to keep my feelings platonic, but I know I have to try.
Her smile is bright and beautiful as she holds up the package of baked goods for me to see and I smile in return before turning back around and briefly adjusting my dick. When I’ve collected myself and feel somewhat in control of my body, I walk over to the set of chairs where she’s standing.
“What flavor do we have today?” I ask, opening the box to take a peek.
“These are called Hello, Darlins—salted caramel with white chocolate chips.” The way her green eyes grow with excitement makes me excited too. I love the passion she has for her baking. “Today is the first day I’ve made them, so you’re my guinea pig.”
I smirk, taking another look inside the box and practically drooling over the freshly-baked muffins. “I will gladly be your guinea pig, even if I have to add extra workouts to my regimen.” I allow myself a big whiff of the sweet scent coming from the box and moan. “Oh, yeah, these will be totally worth the extra gym time.”
She laughs and I catch a hint of something other than humor in her chuckle. Nerves? Her own desire, perhaps? When I glance up at her, I catch the heat in her stare.
Do my eyes deceive me or did Miss Cassidy just give me a quick once-over?
She most certainly was checking out the goods.
I’m not blind and I know when a woman wants me.
The tricky part with Tempest is that she’s obviously denying herself for one reason or another. If I had to guess, she’s probably sworn off romantic relationships, which is why I’ve been put in the friend zone.
I turn back around and walk over to the small table in the corner, placing my muffins there for safekeeping and giving her a chance to look all she wants. I’m an open buffet, Tempest… feel free to have a taste.
Looking up into the mirror, I see the way she’s biting on her bottom lip and I’d say she likes what she sees, too. Oh, Tempest… we should just give into this… I want to tell her I could rock her world, change her perspective, give her the release that would take away every care in the world. If only we were more than friends, but we’re not… right?
“Ready to get started?” I ask her, picking up some tape and wrapping my hands. I already know I’m going to need to pour some of this pent-up energy into a bag. If I don’t, I’m liable to explode… leaving tiny bits of myself all over these mats.
“Yeah,” she finally says, pulling herself from whatever trance she was in, making me laugh to myself. “I’ve gotta leave a little early today, so we should get started.”
My head pops up at that, not liking the idea of our time being cut short. “Where are you going?” I ask the question before I can catch myself. It’s none of your fucking business, Cage. Geez. “I mean… is everything okay?” I ask, hoping it’ll cover up my need to know and come off as more of a casual conversation, but Tempest doesn’t seem to be any the wiser.
She finished placing her bag by the wall and then walks to the middle of the mats, already stretching out her legs and arms. “Oh, my anger management session got moved up today… Lana, the lady who runs the group has to fly out for her cousin’s wedding.”
Again, before I think it through, I ask, “Mind if I tag along?”
Her eyes snap up to the mirror, catching mine. I watch as she traps her full bottom lip in her teeth and then darts her eyes down to the floor. “Uh…” she starts, hesitantly, and I’m getting ready to tell her to forget it… or that I was just kidding, but then she recovers and says, “Sure.”
There was a small battle going on in Tempest’s mind for a split second, but the way her shoulders relax and she replaces the slight worry with a smile tells me she’s okay with it.
“You sure?” I ask, not wanting to put her in an uncomfortable situation.
“Yeah,” she replies, giving me an even bigger smile. “It’d be great to have the company, but my sessions last at least an hour.”
I join her on the mats and begin to stretch my arms over my head, walking in a circle around the perimeter to get my body warmed up. “No problem,” I tell her. “I’ve got a new bag I ordered that I need to pick up… a
nd I wanted to shop around for a speed bag.”
“What’s that?” she asks, giving me an adorable scrunched-up nose of confusion.
I laugh to keep myself from telling her how adorable she is. “You’ll know it when you see it,” I tell her. “Everyone in the gym back home always wants to start on it first. It’s small, hangs from the ceiling and you punch it… fast.” When I emphasize that last part and raise my eyebrows, she giggles and I feel it down in my chest.
“I like to go fast,” she says, beginning her shadow boxing—lead hook, rear uppercut, jab with the left, duck and block… she’s getting really good. But it’s her words that put extra speed in my steps as I make my way around the mats.
“Oh, really?” I ask, keeping my head forward and my breaths steady.
“Yeah… well, you know… I mean.” Her fluster is something I’ve come to love. Not that she’s uncomfortable, but Tempest loves putting her foot in her mouth. Well, she must, because she does it quite often and it’s hilarious.
I laugh before saying, “I kinda picture you as a take-it-slow kind of girl.”
“Don’t make this dirty,” she huffs, still punching the air and ducking her imaginary opponent.
“Move your feet, speedy,” I command, turning my head so she can’t see my ridiculous smile.
We continue on with the workout, switching from shadow-boxing to some Tai Chi. I’ve found it’s a crucial part of the class for Tempest. Once we’re finished with the Tai Chi she always looks so calm and at peace with herself.
I love it.
Helping her find her inner strength is empowering. I’ve always loved teaching people, but teaching Tempest is opening my mind up to a whole new realm of possibilities.
“I need to shower,” Tempest says, smoothing her hand over her sweaty ponytail. Have I mentioned how tempting she is when she’s all hot and sweaty? And dare I say she smells even better, which makes my mind go to filthy, dirty places… all involving Tempest and sweat… and being naked.
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