by Jamie Begley
“Have sex with each other,” Lily finished, looking down at her clenched hands, determined not to snap the red band in front of her sister.
“Yes—no. I don’t have sex with the other members,” Beth explained.
“Kaley said to become a member you have to have sex with the original members.” This time her hand snapped the band, despite her promise to herself.
“Yes, but I didn’t. I became a member because several of them felt they owed me a marker or wanted Razer’s vote in the future. Viper gave me his vote when you were hurt in the accident because I didn’t freak out on Ton. Some gave me theirs because I helped solve Gavin’s murder.”
“So you got all your votes that way?” Lily asked.
“No,” her sister admitted quietly.
Lily twisted the band on her wrist tighter. “I don’t need to hear this, Beth.”
“Lily, I just didn’t feel comfortable discussing this with you.”
“I understand.” And Lily did; it was something she was uncomfortable discussing in detail. “It’s hard to talk to someone who freaks out over every little thing.”
“You don’t, sweetheart.” Beth tried to touch her hand, but Lily pulled away.
Lily stared straight ahead, focusing on a tree to her left, not letting her eyes go to the men sitting on their bikes, watching them intently.
“Who are the original members that Kaley was talking about?” Lily asked the question she knew was going to hurt the most.
Beth hesitated, however she answered her low question. “Viper, Cash, Rider, Train, Lucky, Knox, Razer and Shade.”
Unconsciously, Lily’s hand went to the skin over her heart, rubbing the flesh.
“Your husband is one of the men who gives sexual votes to women who enter the club?” Lily couldn’t hide her disbelief that Beth would let Razer have sex with other women.
“He doesn’t vote anymore. He hasn’t since we broke up three years ago.”
“That’s why you broke up?”
“No, we broke up because I thought he had cheated on me with Bliss. He hadn’t.”
“I see. Do Sex Piston and her crew know about The Last Riders?”
“Yes.”
“So, everyone you're close to knew, except me,” Lily stated. “Me, you didn’t tell.”
“No. I didn’t know if you would be able to handle the life I have with Razer. I didn’t want you to think less of me,” Beth confessed.
“Instead, you just shut me out.” Lily gave her sister a sad smile. “I would never have judged you on your sex life, Beth. Because I have hang-ups doesn’t make me believe others should. What hurt me was the deception. You lied to conceal what was going on.” Lily felt tears slide down her cheeks. No, the details didn’t matter, but the lies definitely did. “I’ve never lied to you, ever, and I didn’t think you had to me, either. I’m hurt, but I’ll get over it probably in a few days. You know I never could stay mad for long.” Lily looked at her sister’s pained expression. She didn’t know what else to say, though. It was like her feelings toward Beth were encased in ice. She couldn’t mend her sister’s broken heart when her own was broken.
“All right. Will you at least quit ignoring my texts and calls?”
“Yes.” Lily got to her feet, picking up her backpack.
“Do you want to go get a bite to eat before you go inside?” Beth’s hopeful expression didn’t sway Lily. She didn’t want to be near Shade ever again.
“No, thanks.”
“How about I drive down this weekend and bring your suitcases here? You have to need clothes.”
“I already bought some new ones. You can box up what’s in my room and give them to the church. I have a test on Monday, so this weekend isn’t a good time. I’ll see you for Thanksgiving.”
Without another word, Lily went inside the building, not letting her gaze return to the parking lot. She wanted to run back into her sister’s arms, but she knew she couldn’t. She didn’t trust her anymore.
* * *
Beth watched her sister walk through the doors before she couldn’t hold it back any longer. She buried her face in her hands, heartbroken at the devastation she had caused with her secrecy. Lily was never going to forgive her. She had broken Lily’s faith in her. She could see it in her delicate, pale face.
Lily looked like the wind would blow her away; she looked so fragile.
“Beth, please don’t cry, kitten.” Razer sat down next to her, pulling her into his arms.
“I’ve lost her, Razer. I can see it in her eyes. She’s so hurt. It’s like looking into an open wound.”
“She’ll get over it.”
“No, Razer, she won’t. She thinks I’ve lied and deceived her, and she’s right. I should have told her at least parts of it; she could have taken that. What she can’t accept is the one person she trusted hiding things from her.”
“Did she tell you not to talk to her anymore?”
“No, but she told me to give her clothes away. She’s cutting herself off from me.”
“Then don’t let her,” Shade’s voice came from over Razer’s shoulder. Beth looked back at him.
“She knows everything now, Shade. She knows that Razer and you both are original members. How the women get the votes.”
“She was bound to find out sooner or later. When you, Winter and Diamond found out, was it any less painful? But each of you got over it and moved on. Lily will, too.”
“No, she won’t, Shade. Lily is different. She’ll believe that Razer and you took advantage of the women.”
“That won’t last long when she’s around them,” Shade said ironically.
Beth got to her feet. “You just don’t get it, Shade. She’s cut not only me, but us all from her heart. That’s what Lily does. Lily doesn’t give second chances with her love.”
“No, Beth, it’s you who doesn’t understand. Lily’s not going to be given the choice.”
Chapter 11
Lily walked back to her dorm from her class the next day. Her mind had not been on the class but on Beth’s face. Lily knew the position Beth had been in must have been hard, yet the ice encasing her kept her from reaching out.
Lily stopped, leaning against a tree as a wave of dizziness swept over her. Taking a deep breath, she straightened, just wanting to make it back to her dorm room and crawl in bed. She walked another few feet, seeing her dorm building not far away. Her sole focus was on simply putting one step in front of the other, so she didn’t notice the big truck pull up next to her.
“Get in, Lily.” Lily looked through the passenger window and saw Shade. She didn’t say anything, taking another step forward. “You can either get in or I’ll put you in.” His dark sunglasses did little to hide his harsh expression.
“Go away,” Lily forced herself to talk to him.
She heard the truck door open and Shade get out of the truck, opening the passenger door. “Get in.”
“If you don’t go away, I’ll scream,” Lily threatened.
“Try it and see what I do.” She could tell he meant it.
Lily sighed. If he wanted to talk like Beth, she would listen rather than argue with him on a busy sidewalk. Maybe then, he would leave like Beth and she could be alone again. She climbed into the truck, and Shade slammed the door closed before going around the front of it and getting back inside.
When he put the truck in gear, driving out of the parking lot, Lily didn’t try to talk to him as he drove through the small town. He pulled into a restaurant with a drive-thru, ordering food, and still not a word had been spoken between them.
He didn’t ask what she wanted when placing the order, yet she knew he was ordering the food for her. She was equally surprised when he didn’t pull to the side to eat. Instead, he got back on the road after the large bag of food was given to him.
The aromas coming from it were making Lily nauseous.
“Don’t you dare throw up. Rider will be pissed enough when he sees his truck is gone.”
Lily forced the bile back down.
Shade pulled into the parking lot of the local hotel, stopping in front of a block of rooms. Picking up the bag, he walked to one of the rooms and disappeared inside after unlocking the door. A second later, he was back, opening the door by her side.
“Get out.”
“Quit ordering me around. I’m not going in there.” The words were no sooner out of her mouth than she found herself lifted from the truck. Shade slammed the door closed with his shoulder as she was struggling to get away, and then carried her into the room, slamming that door shut with his foot.
The room was small, but it held two beds, a small table and a dresser with a television. He set her down on one of the chairs by the small, round table in the room. When she would have jumped to her feet, he leaned down, placing a hand on each side of the chair she was sitting in, effectively blocking her in.
“Lily, I am a man with infinite patience, but you are trying me. I advise you to keep your ass on that chair. Do you understand me?”
Lily did. She could hear the threat in his voice.
Shade straightened, going to the other chair and sitting down. He opened the bag, pulling out a small cup of soup and several packs of crackers then set them in front of her with a plastic spoon.
“Eat.”
“Will you please quit ordering me around?” Lily asked again, her voice as cold as ice.
“I’ll think about it.” Shades lips twitched in amusement at her frosty gaze.
Lily took the lid off the soup, and her stomach lurched.
“Eat a cracker first.”
Lily’s trembling fingers tore open a pack of the crackers, removing one. She nibbled on it until her stomach settled then ate another.
She watched Shade eat the large burger and fries as she picked up her spoon and took a small bite of the soup before she opened another pack of crackers. Her stomach gradually settled.
Shade finished eating, setting one of the drinks in front of her. Lily took a drink. The chocolate shake was delicious. She started to cry as she drank it, remembering the meals they had shared over the summer.
“I hate you.”
“I know.” Shade removed his sunglasses, letting her see his remorse.
Lily quit eating, sitting there with tears coursing down her cheeks, hating herself for letting him see how weak she was.
Shade stood, picking her up before going to the bed and laying her down. “Sleep, Lily. You’ll feel better when you wake up. You’re exhausted.”
Lily closed her eyes, unable to keep the drowsiness at bay.
* * *
She didn’t know how long she’d slept. Waking, she sat up and she could tell it was dark outside.
“What time is it?”
“Ten o’clock. You’ve slept six hours.”
“Oh.” Lily brushed her hands through her hair, trying to untangle the mess.
“There’re clothes for you in the bag. Go take a shower.”
Lily didn’t argue. She had learned it was useless against Shade. So, picking up the bag, she went into the bathroom. She took a quick shower, drying off when she got out, and peeked into the bag he’d given her. Everything she needed was in there. She dressed in the jeans and sweatshirt, putting on the warm socks and tennis shoes. She brushed her hair, leaving it down to dry before putting her dirty clothes in the bag.
She went into the other room to see he had somehow made them sandwiches.
She held up a hand, forestalling him. “I’ll eat.” She wasn’t up to fighting him. If she ate without arguing, then maybe he would take her back to her dorm.
Lily sat at the table, eating her sandwich while watching him lie on the bed on his back, watching the television.
When she was finished, she threw away the trash and the empty milk carton.
“Will you take me back to my dorm now?”
“Later. Come here.”
Lily wasn’t stupid; she wasn’t going near him.
Getting up, she went to the phone on the bedside table instead. Before she could place a call, however, the phone was jerked from her hand and she felt herself falling onto the bed. Lily froze as Shade picked her up and adjusted her until she was lying on the bed with her head on the pillow.
“I’ll take you back in the morning in time for your eight o’clock class.”
“I want to go now,” Lily spoke between clenched teeth.
“Too bad.” Shade lay down on the bed next to her, adjusting the pillow until he could see the television.
“You’re unbelievable. You think you can do anything you want,” she said resentfully.
Shade ignored her, turning the volume up.
Lily crossed her arms over her chest, hating the stubborn man. She lay there, gradually unable to help being drawn in to the old black-and-white movie. She fell back asleep before it ended.
The next thing she knew, Shade was waking her up.
“Move it if you don’t want to miss your class.”
Lily got up from the bed, following Shade outside. She climbed back into the truck, not saying anything. Shade went through a drive-thru, getting her breakfast and handing it to her as he continued driving back to her campus while she ate. She finished as he pulled up outside her dorm.
Opening the door, she slid out of the truck, slamming the door behind her. She heard the truck finally pull out as she walked into her dorm. She had an hour to get changed and get to class, so she rushed upstairs to prepare for the day.
It was only later, as she walked to class, that she realized he had known what time her class was.
* * *
Shade showed up the rest of the week, taking her to his hotel room every evening. Lily quit trying to argue with him. She had tried to evade him, only to lose. She hadn’t spoken to him since the first day, though, and what irritated her the most was he seemed not to care that she was giving him the silent treatment.
Friday, he was waiting for her once again.
She climbed into the truck, expecting him to turn into the hotel again; instead, he headed past it, staying on the road. Lily turned to see his hard profile, wondering where he was going.
A few minutes later, there was no doubt in her mind left.
“I don’t want to go home for the weekend. I have a test Monday.”
“Your books are in your backpack. You can study at home.”
Lily didn’t have a temper, but when it was roused, he was usually the cause, and she’d had enough of him deciding what was best for her. It was a good thing he was driving or Lily would have jumped from the truck.
The closer they came to Treepoint, the madder she became at him. She didn’t even have her car so that she could drive back to school. She would be forced to have Beth take her back, which she was certain was what he had planned.
When he finally pulled up in front of her house, Lily’s hand immediately flew to the doorknob.
Sliding out of the truck, she shot Shade a hateful glance. “Enjoy your Friday night!” She slammed the door, turning toward the house, sick at her behavior.
She opened the house’s front door and was about to shut it when a hand prevented her. Shade propelled her forward with a hand on her arm, shutting the door behind them.
“What are you doing?” Lily tried to jerk away, dropping her backpack.
“Doing something I’ve warned you repeatedly about,” Shade said grimly.
He jerked her to the couch where he took a seat then yanked her over his lap.
“What!”
The smack across her butt caught her by surprise. He had threatened several times, but she had never thought he would actually lay a hand on her.
She tried to throw herself off his lap, yet his hand on her back prevented her. She kicked her legs, which earned her another smack across her bottom. She was wearing a dress, which was sliding dangerously high with her lying over his lap. She was mortified and angrier than ever all at the same time.
“You can’t do this!” Lily screa
med at him.
“Watch me.”
His hand swatted her butt several more times until Lily stopped struggling and lay limply across his thighs, defeated. When he was done, he lifted her to sit next to him on the couch, gripping her jaw in his hand.
“Do not ever talk to me that way again. Do not slam doors to show your anger and throw me a fucking look like the one you did, or I will smack your ass with no dress and panties in the way. Do you understand me?”
Lily tried to turn her face away, her lashes hiding her eyes. She was embarrassed at her childish behavior. “I understand.”
“How do you fucking address me?”
“I understand, Sir.”
As his hand released her jaw, Shade got to his feet, going out the door without another word.
Lily sat there for several minutes, wishing she hadn’t lost her temper. In a matter of minutes, Shade had ripped her icy detachment away, leaving her raw and hurting.
Any woman who wanted his vote needed her head examined.
Chapter 12
Lily had dinner waiting for Beth and Razer when they came through the door. She could tell they weren’t surprised to see her, which wasn’t all that shocking.
They ate dinner with Beth asking about her classes. Lily answered her questions, but she continued to keep the barrier between them; the same barrier she had put up against Razer.
While Beth was trying to be over friendly, Razer made no attempt to hide his anger at her. Lily didn’t blame him, either. It was obvious Beth was hurting. Lily just couldn’t reach out to her yet.
After dinner, Lily got up to clean the table.
“I’ll help.”
“I’ve got it. You go ahead and get ready.”
Beth looked her in the eye while Razer put his arm around her shoulder.
“Go, Beth. There’s no reason to sit around the house, bored to death. Besides, I have a test to study for.”
“I don’t want to go,” Beth said.
Lily sighed, ignoring Razer’s angry glare. This was between Beth and her, and while he was angry, it was up to them to settle the problem.