‘What about the men? Did you recognise any of them?’
Aries clipped his legs back on and got up. He kissed Natalie on the forehead and came over to where I leant against the kitchen worktop.
‘Nope. I didn’t get anything. I’m sorry.’
Father stood from his seat at the table. There was only the four of us in the house. Everyone else had gone to work.
‘Leave the boy alone. He’s had a rough few days.’ He patted me on the back before turning to my brother. His cheeks were red. Smoke started to rise up from his clenched fists.
‘We need to find the person that killed Sophie. If we—’
‘We will! I’ll deal with it, Aries,’ I snapped, pushing away from the counter and standing in front of him. Even with fake legs he was taller than me. ‘This is my fight. Let me handle it.’
My words were quiet. I meant them. Just because I had played nice with Nick, didn’t mean I had forgiven him for Sophie.
Aries nodded once and stepped back. It took a lot for him to back down, but he knew I meant what I said. ‘If you need any help, just let me know. In the meantime, I’m going to keep searching for him.’
Father put his arm around my shoulders and led me to the front steps of the house. We sat for a moment, just watching the traffic go past.
‘I never believed you,’ I said, tapping my foot on the ground.
He faced the sun and closed his eyes. ‘I know.’
We had never been close. He related to some of the others better than me. There was nothing wrong with that, it was natural. It must have been hard to bring up twelve very different children.
‘How is your power doing?’
My gaze shot to him. He still had his eyes closed. Did he know something? I looked at my hand, clenching my fist slowly.
‘I’ve not used it recently.’ I wasn’t lying.
He shuffled on the step. ‘Maybe you should practice.’
‘Just say what you mean,’ I said, turning to face him.
His eyes slowly opened as he felt my movement. He reached forward and gripped my thigh. He squeezed so hard, his knuckles went white. I felt nothing as my skin was pinched in his vicelike hand.
‘You need to find your own way. I know that and your mother knows that…now.’ He released me as quickly as he had grabbed me. ‘Please don’t put the others in danger.’
What did he know? And, how did he know? How dare he assume that I would put my siblings in danger.
‘Don’t talk in riddles, Father, it doesn’t suit you.’
He laughed. It was a rare sound that came from him. I fought the urge to rise to my feet and leave him sitting there.
‘Okay. I forget that I have to be forthright with you.’ He smacked my back. ‘Let’s just say that I know what each one of you are doing. I’m your guardian for a reason. Your mother and I have our own powers.’
I almost fell off the step. My father had never been one to be blunt. I was glad that he had been. My thoughts had been racing all over the place since I had come back from Nick’s house. I had lain in bed the night before, thinking of Sophie. Her smile was what I remembered the most. The harsh reality was I hardly knew her. I didn’t know her family or friends. Yet, we had connected.
‘What do you want from me?’
Father clasped my shoulder with his hand. I didn’t look at him. Instead, I watched a mother and her child skip past.
‘I don’t want anything from you. I want everything for you.’
His riddles made me press my palm into the concrete step.
‘You know the truth. You don’t have to go somewhere else to find it, but if you insist on doing that, be careful.’
He knew about Nick. He must have psychic abilities. The more I tried to deny that it was possible, the more I was being proved wrong.
I didn’t reply. What could I say? Okay, Dad, I promise not to go and see our enemy? I couldn’t do that. I already wanted to visit the house that had unveiled a part of history. Nick was showing me his past for a reason.
‘I’m always careful,’ I said when he didn’t move.
‘Taurus?’
Kerry stood at the bottom of the steps. I had been so engrossed in my thoughts, I hadn’t noticed her approach. Her eyes were red. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she came up the steps. Father nodded at Kerry before leaving us.
‘Are you okay?’
The numbness that usually kept me in a state of okay was starting to lift from the lack of drugs or drink. My knee bounced up and down as my foot moved against the concrete.
‘I suppose. What about you?’ I asked, turning to her when she lowered herself next to me.
She wrung her hands together. I reached out and wiped a tear away as it fell towards her lip. She smiled gently, grabbing my hand and squeezing it.
‘I saw everything.’ She hiccupped.
For the first time since I had been back, I swallowed hard. My throat closed in on itself. I had to open my mouth to pull in a deep breath. Sophie had been killed in front of me. I had cradled her in my arms as the life left her body. I hadn’t been in love with her, but I had certainly liked her…a lot.
‘Cancer said that they took you to a house.’
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. I never cried. Seeing Kerry, the one that had been there, made it difficult not to get tearful.
‘You don’t look hurt.’
A part of me wished that she would stop talking. Another part was glad that she kept my thoughts from going mad.
‘No, I’m fine. Nick didn’t hurt me.’
‘Nick?’ Her face was pale. The skin was shades lighter than it would usually be. ‘Oh, the drug dealer?’
Considering I wanted the truth, I wasn’t doing a good job at being honest with her. I faced forward, resting my arms on my thighs.
‘Yeah.’
‘Why do I get the feeling that there is a lot more that you’re not telling me?’ she said, putting a hand on my arm.
The touch was light. It sent warmth through me. It was nice to have someone care about me for once. Sophie had been the only person that didn’t see me as a waste of space. Maybe Kerry would feel the same.
‘It’s complicated. We’re a unique family.’ I wasn’t lying to her. It made me feel better.
Her exhaled breath landed on my ear, making me shiver. I wanted to tell her everything. I wanted to blurt it all out, but I couldn’t.
‘I was abused by my stepfather.’
Her words smacked me in the chest. I clasped my hand to my heart before turning my head to look at her. My cap shaded me from the sun. It couldn’t shade me from the cringe on her face.
‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ I replied.
She had said that she would tell me her secret when I told her mine. She was trusting me when I couldn’t trust her. Why?
‘I can’t believe I told you that. After everything that’s happened.’ Her eyes watered, so I took her hand in mine.
‘We’ve been through a tough twenty four hours. Thank you for sharing your secret.’
Nodding, she squeezed my hand before standing to go. I let her leave without saying anything more. What could I say? I wasn’t in the position to be an agony uncle. And I certainly wasn’t in the position to tell her that I was a freak with powers.
Jumping up, I skipped down the steps and went towards the park. It was time to take Father’s advice. When we were being chased, I hadn’t been able to make the tree fall over. It was the first time I had failed at using my power.
My walk turned into a jog. My skin was itching. I needed to see if I had lost my power. What had happened? Was it the drugs?
‘Careful!’ someone shouted as I shot past them, my legs pumping harder and harder.
The Common came into view. The grass met my shoes as I thundered onto it. Nature was my passion. It was in my bones. I had researched everything to do with science, nature and the human condition. However, the one thing I hadn’t even looked at was how I was able to manipulate the e
arth.
‘Let’s see,’ I muttered, ducking behind a clump of trees so the dog walkers wouldn’t see me pointing at the ground.
My arm was like a wand. I used my body to feel into the energy of the living plant. Just a small movement with my hand or arm made the element do as I asked.
I held my arm in the air and closed my eyes. The nearest tree was only small. I would start with that one. Energetically feeling my way into the roots of the tree, I tried to mesh my energy with its own. A barrier stopped me from connecting. It was hard to describe how I was able to manipulate the tree. It was even harder to figure out why I couldn’t.
‘Crap!’ I exclaimed when I was denied access to every tree surrounding me.
It must be the substance in my system. My brain was still a bit fuzzy from the day before. I was used to being a bit slow, but the drugs had never made it impossible to use my power.
My phone burst into music. The rock song made my eyes fly open as I tried to grab it out of my pocket. The number was unfamiliar.
‘Taurus, it’s Kerry. I’m sorry. Cancer gave me your number. I can’t believe I just dropped that on you. Especially with everything you’re going through. I—’
‘Kerry?’ I interrupted.
‘Yes?’
‘Come and meet me on Clapham Common. In the kid’s playground.’
I might as well talk to her. I didn’t have to hide my power from her. I didn’t seem to have it anymore.
‘Okay, I’ll be there in a bit.’
I tried to connect with the tree one last time before I buried my phone back in my pocket and left the safety of the clearing. My whole body shook as I walked over to the play area. Kids were in school, so the park was free.
‘What the hell am I doing with my life?’ I muttered, climbing on the roundabout and leaning against the pole.
The first thing I had wanted to do when I woke up, was to take the white powder that now sat in the back pocket of my jeans. The next thing I wanted to do was to go and see Nick. The last thing I wanted was to be sober.
Kerry appeared across the grass. Her maxi dress blew in the gentle breeze. Her ponytail swung as she marched towards me.
‘You just can’t resist me, can you?’ I yelled as she came into the play area.
She raised her eyebrows as she came to stand by the roundabout. She put her hands on her hips and opened her mouth to speak.
‘It’s okay. You don’t have to confess your undying love for me. I already know,’ I joked, trying to grin at her.
Rolling her eyes, she came onto the small roundabout and leant on the pole opposite me. Our knees almost knocked so she scooted back a bit.
‘If you don’t grieve for her, you’ll never let it go.’
The sun heated my bare arms where they held onto the cool metal.
‘She died because of me,’ I replied.
‘No, she didn’t. She liked you. I assume she was trying to help you against the drug dealer?’
The charade was pathetic. Drug dealers killing Sophie because she was trying to help me. Funnily enough, it could be true. My dealers were much less hardcore than the fantasy one I had made up to Kerry. However, it was much more realistic than the actual truth.
‘Something like that.’
She saw straight through me. Her eyes searched mine, so I looked away. I squinted from the sun as I watched the swing move slightly in the breeze.
‘You’re not very emotional, are you?’
She crossed her arms over her chest. The start of a smile tugged at my lips.
‘No, I’m not,’ I replied. ‘There’s no point in crying over everything.’
I believed it. The day that had changed my life was the day I decided never to let emotion overtake me again.
‘I almost killed my siblings.’ I don’t know what made me blurt it.
My shoulders slumped as the truth came out of my mouth. No one knew my secret. Why had I told someone I hardly knew?
‘Was there an accident?’ She pushed her hair back from her shoulder as it fell forward. The crease on her forehead would deepen with my next sentence, but now the words were out, I had to tell the story.
‘No. It was on purpose.’
The night had haunted me for years. I took drugs to try and erase the memory. I drank to try and forget the pain of what I had almost done.
‘You almost killed your brothers and sisters on purpose?’
Her eyes widened at my confession. She was right to judge me. I even judged myself for what I had almost done.
‘Can I tell you?’ I swallowed as I looked at her from under the lip of my cap.
Her expression softened as she nodded. I was asking for her trust. My question wasn’t about telling her my secret, it was asking if she would keep it. She knew that. I knew that. We had an unspoken agreement.
‘I used to be a personal trainer. I was at uni and loved every minute of it. You know what that lifestyle is like. You drink and take drugs. It’s just part of it. One day, I came home to find the others gathered around the table. They were holding an intervention. They threatened to tell my tutors that I was taking drugs.’
I cracked my knuckles as I told the story. It seemed so petty. When they decided to try and rule my life, I had gone mad. No one could rule me. No one.
‘Go on,’ Kerry encouraged.
The wind moved her hair. It was only a slight movement, but it caught my eye and reminded me of Sophie. The two women were similar.
‘I was calm. Instead of shouting and trashing things like I usually would, I remained calm. They thought they could control me. They believed that I was complacent and stupid. What they didn’t know was that they had awoken something in me that I had never felt before.’
The memory made me grip the pole hard between my fingers. I had a problem with being controlled and I didn’t know why. I had never known why.
‘What was that?’ Her voice was almost a whisper.
‘Hatred. I hated them for interfering in my life. The images of what I would do to them sickened me. I hated them for making me feel that way. Why did I imagine killing them all in their sleep?’
The confession slunk out of me like a dark shadow. Kerry would be disgusted but it didn’t matter. I finally admitted the truth.
‘What did you do?’ she whispered.
Bile rose into my mouth. It burnt my throat as I swallowed it back down. Sighing, I let my head fall forward and breathed out.
‘It’s not what I did that scared me. It’s what I thought I could do,’ I began, looking her directly in the eye. ‘That night, when everyone was in bed, I went to the kitchen and took out a knife. There wasn’t a specific person that had upset me. I felt betrayed by every single one of them. I went to Aries’ room first. Scorpio and Leo were asleep but Aries was watching a film.’
Kerry shivered. Goose bumps rose on her arms as she watched me. I couldn’t look away from her. The vision of her face kept me from picturing myself holding a knife, ready to kill.
‘If he had been asleep, I don’t know if I would’ve done it. I ask myself that question every time I’m sober. If Aries was asleep, would I have gone through with my plan?’
‘Surely most people have thought about killing people they’re annoyed with,’ Kerry said, rubbing her arms.
She was kind. Trying to make me feel better wouldn’t work. I wasn’t right in the head sometimes. I knew that. The drugs were the only thing that stopped me from having those thoughts.
‘I don’t think they pick up a knife and intend to go through with it, though.’
‘Were you taking drugs?’
I looked down as I brought my hands together in front of me. The hairs on my arms were long and dyed blonde by the sun. My skin was tanned and rippled over the muscle in my forearm.
‘Yes, every day.’
Her feet shuffled. She wore sandals. Her toenails were painted green to match her dress.
‘Have you ever thought that it could’ve been the drugs?’
&nb
sp; Shaking my head, I brought my gaze up to meet hers. Our eyes locked. I didn’t want pity or understanding, but the depths of her eyes offered both.
‘There’s no excuse for the way I acted,’ I said, shaking myself.
My phone buzzed with a text. I was pleased for the distraction.
‘You’re a drug addict. They make you do crazy things, Taurus.’
The text was from Cancer. Matt had gone into hiding because Nick knew that he had gone behind his back. It was a reminder of the world I lived in. A world that Kerry knew nothing about.
‘They’re not as bad as everyone makes out!’ I snapped. I got off the roundabout and gave it a push so she couldn’t follow me.
‘Hey!’ Kerry called as I spun away and left the play area.
Why did everyone blame what I did on drugs? I put my hand in my pocket to check that the baggie with the white powder was still in there. I froze when I realised what I had done. Only an addict would check their drugs straight after they denied a problem.
‘You can keep running away from your problems or you can face them. Either way, Taurus, I’m here for you if you need me.’ Kerry puffed the words as she ran to catch up to me.
Gritting my teeth, I turned to her. She put up her hand before I spoke.
‘Being a drug addict is not easy. I can’t even begin to imagine it, but you choose to take drugs every day. I never chose to be abused. I’ll tell you something, the thoughts I’ve had about killing my stepfather, are probably worse than yours.’
My mouth dropped open. When she put it like that, it sounded like I was a whiney boy.
‘I’m sorry about what happened to you.’
I genuinely was, too. My upbringing had been easy compared to hers by the sound of it. I had no right to complain about my life when she had suffered.
‘What you did, or didn’t do…it wasn’t great. But you’ve got to stop beating yourself up for something you thought of doing. If you got off the drugs—’
I spun away from her. She was preaching. She had been kind enough to listen to me, but I didn’t appreciate—
Something hit my back. I glanced over my shoulder. Kerry’s bag lay on the ground. Had she just thrown her bag at me?
‘I’ll stop,’ she said, holding her hands in the air.
Taurus: Book 3 in a Young Adult Paranormal Romance Series (The Zodiac Twin Flame Series) Page 10
