by Jen McConnel
She threw back her head and laughed gleefully. The bones around her neck danced, and her belt rattled. My throat convulsed but I kept my eyes down, still not looking at her.
“And you are a Red. Why did you waste yourself, girl? Red magic belongs to me. That goddess you serve is nothing but perfumes and passion. You will not go far in her service.”
“But I am sworn.”
She waved her hand in the air. “A waste! You would be better at my feet. What work can a goddess of love have for a Witch such as you? With me, you would be unstoppable.”
She leaned forward, and I caught a whiff of decay. I started breathing shallowly through my mouth and tried not to grimace.
“Let us make a deal, no? You want more than the bargain you have made. There is a way to unmake your choice.”
Suddenly, I remembered Persephone and the pomegranate seeds. I stared at Kali, my thoughts flying. If I could somehow trick her into telling me what to do, maybe I could unbind myself from Aphrodite if I ever got tired of her.
“What would happen then?”
She grinned wickedly. “You would be unclaimed. And then you could be mine.”
“But—” I didn’t want to belong to this goddess. I didn’t even want to be stuck in the bathroom with her for another minute, but I had to tread carefully. “But what would you ask of me?”
“Blood. And you would love it; I have seen it in your heart. You crave chaos, and your mistress will not let you have your fill. I would never stint you on your share of blood.”
I nodded even as I tried to swallow the bile rising in my throat. “How do I become free?”
Her eyes lit up with joy, but after a moment she bared her teeth at me in a snarl. “You will not hear it from me. You smell like deceit. Unless you will bind yourself to me, why should I help you find your freedom?”
I nodded at her, palms sweating. “Then I’ll just figure it out for myself.”
Kali laughed. “It will not be as easy as you think. Maybe I shall enjoy watching you ruin what little you have left.”
She leaned back against the mirror above the sink. There was no reflection behind her.
***
I didn’t even try to go back to sleep that night. I lay awake in my bed, thinking about everything Kali had said. I didn’t want to believe that I would be better off serving such a bloodthirsty goddess, but I had this annoying fear that she might be right. Even if I didn’t want to accept such a thing, there was my dream to consider. I had been enjoying the destruction I caused, and reveling in the blood of my victims. Dreams had to mean something, didn’t they? What if that dream meant Kali was right?
I tossed and turned, my thoughts shifting from the dream to the frightening goddess I had just met. They came to rest on the three pomegranate seeds.
Silently, I got out of bed and crossed the room. My eyes were accustomed to the dark after hours of wakefulness, and I didn’t need a light to locate the blood-red seeds. I held them in my hand and stared hard at them, wondering.
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” Aphrodite’s voice rang out sharply. I turned to face my patron.
“Why not?”
“Things will not work quite the way you are thinking.”
I closed my fingers around the seeds, but made no move to set them down. “How are things working now?”
“No other god or goddess can harm you. You are under my protection. And I am going to help you learn how to manage your power.”
“That sounds great. But why haven’t you done anything yet?” Maybe it was unreasonable to expect, well, magic, but I was irritated that all she’d shown me was the glamour. To be fair, I reminded myself, she hasn’t been my patron for very long, but before I could apologize, Aphrodite loomed in front of me, doing her larger-than-life trick again.
Her cheeks were tinted red with anger. “How dare you call my patronage nothing?”
I should have been frightened, but I thought about what Kali had said and stood my ground. “You saved me from that trucker. And you taught me the art of glamour. But what else have you done?” I felt frustration bubbling up inside my chest, and I started speaking faster, not waiting for a response. “Did you protect my parents when Hecate brainwashed them? Have you shown me any useful magic? It’s no wonder Helen screwed up, with a patron as helpful as you.”
She slapped me with an open palm, and I stepped back, stunned. With a gesture, she used air to seal my jaw and I stared at her, helpless.
“You will not speak to me in such a way again. It would be within my rights to call down a brutal punishment on you. Did you not vow to me that you would follow me with devotion and obedience?” The goddess smoothed her robes, her hands lingering over her hips. “However”—she smiled sweetly—“I am in the mood to be magnanimous. Consider this your last chance. You will not cross me again.”
She turned away from me. I tried to open my mouth, but found I was still bound by her spell. I stood, mute, waiting for her to decide what to do with me.
“You are so eager to learn to do things. Fine. We will begin the real work tomorrow.”
She vanished, but my jaw was still locked. If it hadn’t been, I probably would have eaten the pomegranate right then just to piss Aphrodite off. But I guess she knew that and wasn’t taking any chances. I only hoped my parents wouldn’t notice my silence.
***
Luckily, Mom was in such a rush that morning that she barely noticed how quiet I was. As she flew out the door, she called over her shoulder, “Have a great day at school, sweetie!”
I smiled and waved, but my stomach churned. How much longer could I keep my parents blissfully ignorant of the situation? Telling them once had been hard enough; I couldn’t imagine telling them a second time.
I cleaned up the kitchen in silence, waiting for Aphrodite to reappear. When all the dishes were washed and she still hadn’t put in an appearance, I went upstairs. Xerxes raced ahead of me, determined to trip me up on the stairs.
Distracted, I knelt down and scratched him behind the ears for a minute. When I opened the door to my bedroom, I wasn’t surprised to see Aphrodite standing there.
I tried to speak, but to my chagrin I found that I was still bound by her spell. I narrowed my eyes at her, and dipped my head in a slight bow. She smiled humorlessly.
“I’ve said it before; subservience is not a trait I like to see in Reds.” She waved her hand carelessly, and I felt a popping in my jaw. I tried to speak again.
“I’m ready for my lesson.”
She glared at me. “Didn’t you learn anything last night? It’s not up to you to call the shots. You will wait until I decide to teach you.” She stopped, eyeing me for an immeasurable stretch of time. “I have decided to teach you how to work love magic.”
My doubt must have shown on my face, because she shook her head in exasperation. “It’s time for a field trip, Darlena.”
With those words, the room swirled around me and everything went dark. It took a minute for my eyes to adjust, but even before I could make out my surroundings, I could smell stale popcorn. I shifted my feet, annoyed at the squelching sound they made on the sticky floor. When my eyes adjusted enough that I could see the screen, I realized we must be at a movie theater.
“Why are we here?”
“Sit back, watch, and learn.”
Advertisements were scrolling on the screen, but I didn’t think Aphrodite wanted me to learn about the hottest new soft drink. I glanced around the theater at the other patrons. There was a spattering of women older than my mom, some in groups and some alone, and here and there I glimpsed some girls who were a little younger than me. They were probably skipping school, but I didn’t think the giggling girls were who Aphrodite wanted me to watch. Then I spotted them.
The couple was obviously still in school, because the girl kept looking around nervously. I wondered if she’d ever cut school before. The boy wasn’t that cute, but he seemed confident, sitting there next to his date. I stared at them
intently.
“Good. You aren’t as dumb as you act. They are who we will practice on.” Aphrodite’s voice was a soft whisper beside me.
“What do we do?” I tried to whisper back, but I felt loud and conspicuous sitting at the back of the movie theater with a goddess.
“First, feel the situation. What do you know about them?”
“Are you crazy? We just sat down; how am I supposed to know anything about them?” Even as I argued with her, I realized she was right. I did know things about the young couple. I took a deep breath and struggled to put my strange knowledge into words.
“They’re skipping class to be here this morning.” She nodded encouragingly, so I went on. “She’s never been on a date before, and she’s never done anything that would get her in trouble, so she’s doubly nervous.” I paused, staring intently at the young couple. “He’s not as confident as he looks, because even though he cuts class all the time, there’s something about this girl that he really likes. He wants to impress her, but he doesn’t know how. Skipping was his idea.”
I glanced at Aphrodite and she smiled. “Very good. For your first time, you’re very in tune with the energy and vibrations in the air.” She rubbed her hands together like some kind of super villain. “Now, Darlena, what would you do with your magic?”
I sat very still, thinking. I knew I could make the boy fall head over heels in love with his date, if I wanted. I could also make him try to cop a feel, which would make the girl dump her popcorn over his head. I shifted uncomfortably. I didn’t really like either option: they both felt so intrusive, so unfair. What right did I have to manipulate people in that manner?
I finally spoke. “I could do a lot of things. But what would I do? I think I would just use magic to bless this date, making sure they each have a great time. I don’t want to do any more than that.”
Aphrodite looked disappointed. “I had hoped you would have higher ambitions, child. I had hoped you would do something interesting. But,” she continued, “as this is your first lesson, you have my permission to practice in any way you want.”
I concentrated very hard on the young couple, thinking about fluttering hearts, hands brushing in the popcorn, and an awkward goodbye where two people longed to kiss but no one took the first step. I thought about the tingling anticipation of sitting beside someone really cute in the dark, and I sent my thoughts forward. I could see red sparks flowing down the aisle of the theater and enveloping the first daters. The sparks lingered in the air for a moment before falling like snowflakes onto the girl and the boy in front of me. The air shimmered and the sparks cleared and Aphrodite clapped softly.
“Well done. You might not have a flair for the dramatic, but you certainly know how to wield power.”
“Where do we go now?” I started to rise but she pulled me back down.
“Now”—she smiled—“we stay here. There will be two shows to watch: the one on the screen, and the one you created. See which one teaches you more.”
Just then, the previews began to roll, and I sat back in my seat. Aphrodite had picked a corny romantic comedy for my training, a kind of movie I rarely watched on my own. At first, I was annoyed, but soon I found myself caught up in the missteps of the characters and the lead actress’s convincing tears when she thought that she’d lost her chance at love. I’m embarrassed to admit this, but I teared up when the couple on the screen finally got together. I couldn’t help thinking about Justin. Maybe, if we gave it another shot, we could find our own happy ending. My thoughts spiraled off into a fantasy, and the credits were over before Aphrodite elbowed me in the ribs and pointed.
Wiping my face, I noticed that the girl was leaning on the boy’s shoulder, nestled happily at his side. I smiled; maybe Red magic wasn’t just about destruction.
I grinned up at my patron, and she nodded once before vanishing.
“It was actually a lot of fun!” I lounged across Rochelle’s bed that afternoon, watching her paint her fingernails. She was experimenting with designs, but I couldn’t tell if she was trying to paint splotches or spiders. I didn’t say anything, though.
“Sounds like hell to me.” With a deft flick, she finished her nails and held her hands out, eyeing the results.
“I know.” I laughed. “It should have been awful. But the movie was sort of sweet, and it felt really nice to know that I made those kids have a good first date.”
Rochelle screwed the cap back onto the polish. “Oh, goody. You’re all warm and fuzzy. Darlena, get a clue. Aphrodite didn’t teach you anything today. She just had you play Cupid.”
I tossed a pillow at her, which she dodged. “But I didn’t know I could do anything like that. Even if it’s nothing major, at least I’m still learning magic.”
She snorted. “I don’t think getting two horny teenagers to snuggle during a movie counts as anything magical.”
I frowned, feeling the doubt of the previous night creep back into my mind. “What would you have done in my place?”
“First,” she snapped, “I would never have sworn to such a pathetic goddess!”
“Pretend you did.” My voice was tight with anger, but if Rochelle noticed, she gave no sign.
“Well, then, pretending I was as dumb as you, if I were stuck with Aphrodite and love magic, I’d at least do something interesting.”
“Like what?”
She thought for a moment. “I don’t know. Ruin the date somehow and make the girl cause a scene?”
I looked at her, feeling a little guilty. For just a moment, I’d had the same thought in the theater. “Why would anyone want to do that?”
She looked at me with pity. “Anger is more powerful than love. What good is it to make two people have a fairy-tale first date? That’s such a waste of magical energy. You raised all that power, and then you let it fizzle out.”
“But this is the first time I’ve used Red magic and not done harm.” I tried to keep my voice level, but I was upset. “Can’t you at least acknowledge that it’s good to know I can stick to the Rede?”
She turned away from me and began putting on eyeliner. “If I were a Red Witch, I’d never waste my power on stupid little love affairs.”
***
I was in a sour mood when I left Rochelle’s house, and she didn’t try to get me to stay for dinner. It was still light out, and I dawdled as I walked, taking my time and looking around at the brilliant colors of the trees. Fall had really decided to show herself, and the branches looked like they were dipped in gold and lit on fire. I drew a deep breath and struggled to push thoughts of Rochelle from my mind. I slowed down, lingering so I could enjoy the crisp air. Even if I did prefer Samhain, I found myself looking forward to Mabon more than usual. Although it might be awkward if Red sparks started shooting off my hands—my parents wouldn’t know what to think—I was ready to celebrate the true arrival of fall.
Fall is sneaky in North Carolina, because summer likes to linger. But I can always tell when fall has really arrived. I’m not quite sure how to explain it, but I guess there’s a certain smell in the air that I recognize. I took another deep breath through my nose and frowned.
The crisp scent of fall was still there, but underneath was a smell like burned food. I noticed a thick, gray cloud to my right. Acting on impulse, I turned the corner and cut across a side street. The closer I walked to the smoke, the stronger the smell became, and my heart hammered in my throat as I realized what it was. I prayed I was wrong, but the sight that met my eyes proved that my prayer came a little too late.
The coffee shop on the corner by Trinity was a charred mass of wood and melted glass. Flames still licked around the structure, but they seemed to be teasing the spectators: all the damage was already done. I spotted Cindy clutching her barista apron and sobbing. Firefighters were on the scene, but their hoses seemed worthless. It was eerily like the destruction I’d dreamt about before meeting Kali, and I shuddered, pushing that thought from my mind. Whatever had happened had nothing to do
with Red magic. Steam hissed up into the air to join the inky smoke, and I crossed the street to see what had happened.
“Darlena!” I looked up, startled. Justin pushed through the crowd.
“What are you doing here?” I demanded as he got closer.
Instead of answering, he pulled me into a tight hug, crushing my ribs. “I thought you were inside!”
I looked at him, stunned. “Why would you think that?”
“Your text.”
Suddenly, I realized why he was worried. I had texted him after leaving the movie theater to let him know I was going to hang out with Rochelle. He had texted back that he’d meet up with me later. He must have assumed we’d gone to our usual spot. I looked up at what was left of the building and suppressed a shiver.
“We were at her house. I was just walking home when I smelled the smoke.”
He hugged me again. “I’m glad you’re okay.” He shifted his concerned gaze to the scene in front of us. “I wonder what happened?”
“That girl over there, that’s Cindy. She worked here. Maybe she knows something.”
Justin steered me through the crowd and I hesitantly tapped Cindy on the shoulder. Her eyes were puffy from crying, but I thought I saw a flicker of fear when she recognized me. Then she started crying again, and I wasn’t sure.
“Cindy, what happened?”
“What happened?” She screeched loud enough that people around us turned to look. “What happened? Why don’t you tell me, you crazy freak?”
I looked at Justin nervously. “I don’t know. I just saw the smoke and walked over.”
She shook her head. “I don’t believe you. I saw you flip that car over, and you knew I saw you. You cursed me!”
Stunned, I took a step back. “Why would I do that?”
“Cause you’re some kind of satanic freak! You hexed me, and I’m lucky to have made it out alive!” She started sobbing again, and I felt a wave of fear. Cindy had seen me use magic on that car, but I would never have done anything like that on purpose. People were watching us, and I wondered when Cindy’s voice would be enough to draw the attention of a police officer. I swallowed nervously.
