I’m never what anyone anticipates.
Syd and Rocky finally make their way in the bar, they come walking up to where I’m seated. I’ve already done them both a favor and ordered a whiskey neat and a Guinness, plus a mango margarita for myself. The girl named Mar said it was her specialty, so who was I to say no to a girl who says her margaritas are better than anyone else!
Whenever I blink, in that split second when my eyes are shut the only thing I can see is Zac’s message to me. It’s funny, there was a time where I would trust him more than anything, and here I am right now, a few months after our awful break up – if that’s what I can even call it. Betrayal sounds much more fitting. No, he didn’t cheat on me. He did something far worse than that. Something that made people know exactly who I was. There were some people who said that I was the one that did it. That it was a publicity stunt to get me a bigger following.
In my heart, I knew that it was Zac. Sure, I had moments of doubt, where I thought that maybe that was my own head talking but when he admitted it to me at a music festival two months ago I was blindsided. I almost cried right then on the spot. He told me how he did a great job at covering up where the photos came from, essentially telling me the step by step process he took in trying to ruin my career before it even started. When I think about it, and I mean when I think about it hard, I’ve come to understand that I will never know why he’s done what he has and why he continues to tear me down.
Rocky, Syd, and Jase all agreed that Zac has been trying to ruin my career because until his girlfriend hit it big, no one had a clue who I was, and once that happened – his spotlight dimmed. They weren’t wrong, I remember going to events with him, how he’d be out promoting his latest music and they’d ask him about me. Now, being in the position I am, whenever I reflect back I can see it clear as day. That will never give him the excuse to sell my nudes to the press.
It was a PR nightmare according to Evie, my manager, and everyone at Rebel Records. I was lucky in a sense because they couldn’t terminate my contract because of it. Evie organized me going out to multiple events like children’s hospitals, benefit concerts and anything that she could do to help show the public that I was a stand-up girl, that I wasn’t tarnished or this slut. Half of America could flat out see what Zac did, and the other half call me a whore on a daily basis, hiding behind the safety net of their computer screens.
“Holy. Fuck” Rocky chuckles, grabbing my hand and yanking me out of the barstool. I practically fall over with the force that he used to tug me out. He belly laughs and points to a sign, “Karaoke Night”.
“Oh no. We are not doing Karaoke night.” I tell him, as sternly as possible.
“I’m not, but you are!” He gives me that grin, the one that I know melts the panties off every woman in a twenty-foot radius.
“Dang it!” I mumble.
Rocky calls over to the bartender, “Hey sweet thing, it’s karaoke night!”
“Sure can be if you can find anyone brave enough to sing in front of this crowd,” I hear her say. Internally, I’m cursing, which is something I never do.
“I am not singing one of my own songs,” I tell Rocky, who is smiling like he just won the lottery.
“Alright. Lemme find ya something good. You trust me, don’t ya?’ I nod, regretting my decision instantly.
Before I know it, I’m being led to the stage, dingy old microphone in hand. This sucker could be as old as I am, who knows. Rocky is chuckling, Syd smiling along next to him, and from the corner of my eye, I see no one else besides the woman who I’ve come here to see.
If I had any doubts that Elena was my sister, they’re all gone now. They just vanished into thin air. We are practically identical, my skin is a little bit darker than hers, but the same fiery red hair – she has it, the same eyes, cheek bones, even down to our nose.
In that very moment, her eyes meet mine and the music starts. I could kill Rocky for this one. He rips his cell from his back pocket, and I know he’s recording this.
IDGAF by Dua Lipa flows through the speakers.
I swing my hips to the rhythm of the beat, loving how much this song resonates with me. In life, there are always songs that speak to you one way or another and Dua Lipa definitely speaks to me in this one.
Through her lyrics she tells the story of an ex who realizes that he made a mistake, begging and pleading for her to come back and how she doesn’t give a fuck because she knows that he lost the greatest thing in his life.
Oh, and how I relate to that.
“Don’t give a fuck!” Rocky chuckles, I see Syd behind him shaking his head, but I know that the three of us are living it up. I don’t know any of these people in the bar, most of them aren’t paying attention, but the select few have their eyes glued to me. Two people in particular. Butch, and my sister, who I plan on talking to as soon as I’m finished with this song.
It’s game time.
CHAPTER 5
Her intuition was her favorite super power. -Anonymous
Bellamy
When I walked off stage it felt like an out of body experience. My feet were moving, but it didn’t feel like I was leading them to their destination. One second, I was on the stage and the next I was standing in front of Elena, her mouth moving so fast, and yet I heard nothing. As if I was tuning everything around me out, it all went silent.
Her red hair flowed over her tan leather jacket, she paired it perfectly with a white tee shirt and dark denim jeggings. Looking over her features I saw myself in her with each second that passed by, and then I came to realize that we must look exactly like our father. I wonder if he has the same red hair that we do, and if he doesn’t…where does our hair color come from?
“Jesus, Bells, stop being so damn quiet” Rocky nudges me in the side, coming up from out of nowhere – or maybe he’s been beside me all along and I just never noticed. Shock will do that to you, won’t it?
“H-i.” I stutter out, sounding like a rambled little chipmunk. To be honest, I’m a little shocked that I’m not shaking in my boots right now. I had a plan, a very specific plan on how to tell Elena what I discovered last year, but now…it’s all gone to crap. I’ll be lucky if I can even get a full sentence out to her.
“I can’t believe you showed up here, to my husband’s bar! This has to be the best day ever, I am such a fan of your work. You have to tell me when that new album is coming out, and good lord, tell me the name! I’ve been waiting to hear it for months!” she gushes.
Instead of humoring her by talking about my music, and telling her how this was a complete coincidence, I can’t. There’s part of me that wants to backtrack and run back to the bus, to my home, to safety – but I refuse to do that.
I came here for one thing, to meet my sister, and while I’ve done that, I haven’t gotten to know her, which at the end of the day is what I truly want. I want the family I never had, the sister that I always wanted. It’s funny, when your family is ripped from your life you come to want it more than anything else in this world, and I do. I want it so terribly. My family is literally staring me straight in the face, and I’m going to do something about it.
“Elena.” Her face contorts at the mere mention of her name. I can’t say if she had said her name to me or not, for a few minutes I was tuning everything out.
“Uh, how do you know my name?” Her eyebrows furrow and the giddy woman before me is replaced with something calculating and cautious. There’s no way that I can blame her, if the roles were reversed I would no doubt be doing the same very thing.
“I’m…well, it’s a bit complicated. Is there somewhere private we can talk?” She looks me up and down, I’m sure she’s wondering why I’d want to speak with her privately, and the more I wait for her answer, the more that nervousness boils in my blood. From the very beginning, I knew that this would never be easy, although, I had no idea how difficult this would actually be.
“Sure,” she nods, turning on her heel and leading me down along the
bar, until we turn the corner and she sits in a secluded booth. I can see that there are patrons a few booths away from us, but no one is close enough to hear what I’m going to say – I’m so thankful for that. This time needs to be private, so both she and I can process everything that’s about to unfold.
“You asked how I knew your name, and it’s kind of complicated…well, okay…it’s really complicated. Last year, I found out that my father wasn’t the man I thought he was. He wasn’t the man who raised me growing up until he the time he passed away. My biological father was someone else. Someone my mother ran from when she was young.
“Long story short, I found out that my father’s name was Jimmy and he ran the Vipers MC in Texas. Now, I’ve done a lot of digging and I can’t find anything on the Vipers – I’ve looked.” It’s true. I did look, I looked, and I looked and every single time I came up emptyhanded. It’s as if everything that had to do with the Vipers MC was obliterated.
“The same day I found out who my biological father was, I found out that I had an older half-sister too, you.” I offer a small smile at the end, hoping it will help, instantly I know that it won’t.
Elena is silent for a few moments, my heart is pounding deep in my chest and when she speaks I am fearful, for the look on her face and the way she clenches her fist tells me everything that I need to know…that her reaction isn’t going to be a good one. “I don’t know who you think you are, coming here and telling me some fucking fairytale story about me having a little sister that I didn’t know about. I don’t have any siblings, I have me. I am an only child. My father never, ever had another child, not even with a club whore – who I imagine your mother would’ve been. He would have done everything in his power to make sure that he didn’t have another child. So, this tells me that you’re after something and I refuse to listen.”
She puts her hand on the table in front of us and I grab it, “I don’t know you, and I can admit that. So, I can’t imagine anything that is going through your mind right now. I’m just asking you, to please give me a chance. If you don’t believe me, let’s get a DNA test done.” Like the creep that I am I open my clutch and pull out a small circular tube, “This is my saliva. I knew that there was a good chance you’d think I was a fraud…I probably would too if the roles were reversed. Please, just take it to get tested.”
Elena doesn’t utter a single word to me, she yanks the vial out of my hand and exits the booth. There is a big part of me that wants to yell and scream at her for thinking the worst of me right off the bat, but I know that I can’t do that. After all, if the roles were reversed – I’d want the DNA test too.
***
After Elena’s awful reaction I grabbed Syd and Rocky and told them we needed to go back home. Home, also known as the bus. When we got back Jase was pissed that we took his car. It turns out that he actually needed it. I use the term need loosely, he has a roadie drive it behind the tour bus, so he can focus on writing new songs. That man is a workaholic beast, it shocks me that he even takes a few hours out of the day to sleep. Every time I see him he’s typing lyrics into Notes on his phone or is singing along to a melody that we don’t know. That’s how Jase is though, a very determined man. My point is that if Jase really wanted to go somewhere one of the roadies could drive him. He was huffing and puffing for a good hour after we got back with his car.
Fast forward to now and it’s just passed one in the morning. I’m wide awake in my bed. I roll over, grabbing my phone, almost as if I magically expect it to be seven or eight. Nope. It’s only been ten minutes.
There’s only one way that I’m going to start feeling better. It’s a long shot, but I can’t keep tossing and turning all through the night. I have to say my peace. Sure, Elena’s reaction didn’t really bug me at first. Now that it’s been festering for hours the only thing that it’s been doing has been bugging me.
Screw this.
Yeah, she might be upset. I mean, I kind of did catch her off guard, but she doesn’t get to act like Miss. Perfect and judge me, or my mom. She should’ve kept her big mouth shut and just went along to get the test processed.
For the next twenty minutes, I silently curse to myself, especially when I decide to change clothes and steal Jase’s car keys. Oops.
Destination: A bar named Bubba’s.
Honestly, I’m not surprised when I arrive at Bubba’s and see that there are still a few bikes in the parking lot. Sure, it may be almost two am, but outlaw bikers are known for partying, right? I was never much into the party scene, so I wouldn’t know. I think I am about to learn a lot, though.
Quickly I pull the keys from the ignition and slide them into the pocket in my jacket. When I step out of the car I immediately regret wearing a dress. It’s not frigid, quite yet, but it is cold.
“My, my. If that isn’t the sweetest lil’ thing that’s caught my eye.” I hear his words before I see him. Out here it’s like his voice is coming from every direction. A wolf glaring down at his prey perhaps.
“Butch” I grumble, annoyed as I search the parking with my eyes lot for the man.
“Sugar,” he hisses from behind me and I jump, startled out of my own mind.
“It’s not nice to sneak up on people!” I huff at him, turning around and smacking his chest. His eyes are illuminated by the lights lining the parking lot, it’s not overly bright but enough to where I can make out his features. His beard still points out to me like a beacon. I wonder why he even has it, he’s bound to be even hotter under all that hair. Call it a weird sense of deja vu, I just know.
“I wasn’t sneaking up on you. I’ve been right here this entire time, it’s not my fault if you aren’t paying attention to your surroundings.” I blink a couple times, processing what he just said to me. Before I can say anything, he’s already speaking again. “What are you doing out here all alone anyway? Where are your two friends?” His eyes leave my own and search the parking lot, no doubt looking for Syd and Rocky.
“They aren’t here. I came alone.”
“This isn’t the kind of place where a girl like you shows up alone. You’re lucky it was me that found you and not someone else, do you understand?”
“Oh, like it’s so dangerous in this bar?” I grumble, annoyed at the man standing before me. He doesn’t know me, but he somehow believes that he knows what’s best for me.
“You have no idea how dangerous it is in this bar, Sugar. Not everyone that comes here is a friend. Why are you here?” His eyes come back to meet my own, Butch isn’t a tall man, only a few inches taller than me. His personality seems to be the most dominating part about him, he may only be a few inches taller and has the body like a swimmer, but he somehow makes me feel like I’m surrounded.
“Did you come back to see me?” he asks.
“No,” I lie. Fudge! CRAP.
“You did,” he smiles, bringing his thumb up to my jaw, running it slowly along my skin.
“No. I didn’t,” I lie again. I came here to see Elena, or that’s what I thought, but I didn’t. I came here for one thing.
I came here for a hot and heavy one-night stand with this biker that I can’t get out of my mind. I’ve tried and tried not to think about him. yet here I am, heart beating ridiculously fast in my chest, wearing a very short dress, staring into his eyes that could burn right through me.
“Stop lying sweetheart. We both know you want me. It’s okay, I’ve wanted to get a taste of you too.” He grabs onto my neck forcefully, pulling me towards him. Part of me thinks that I shouldn’t enjoy this, that it doesn’t need to be this rough, but I like it rough. No. Scratch that. I love it rough. I expect his kiss to be as rough as his action, and I was wrong to expect that. His lips are soft, like velvet, slowly running over my own.
I give in, unleashing my complete sexual being. I’m not a girl who has one-night stands, it’s just not what I do. Tonight, was different though, I needed to feel something other than the hurt that has been flooding through my mind since I left this place
a few hours prior. When I came out here, to this very bar in hopes to finally talk to my sister, I didn’t think about every situation that could have unfolded. Now, I find myself over-analyzing everything that she said to me and wanting to prove her wrong, or maybe I just want to prove her right.
The only way I can shut my mind off is by distracting it with something else, or maybe…someone else entirely.
I run my hands up his chest, feeling his tight muscles through his shirt. Butch hisses at me, biting harshly down on my bottom lip which causes me to yelp. The moment I pull back from him, his hands slide up my thighs and set firmly on my ass as he pulls me up into the air. Instinctively, I wrap my legs around his hips, gripping his leather vest as tightly as I can. His tongue flutters over my bottom lip where he just bit, the sting giving me a tingling sensation from my head all the way down to my toes.
I hear the crunching underneath us as he takes step after step towards the edge of the parking lot to the woods. It turns me on knowing that someone could come up and see at us at any given second, it’s the risk of someone catching us – that’s what is turning my ember into a flame right now.
“I’ve wanted to slide my cock into you since the moment you walked through those doors,” Butch sneers, shoving my back up against a tree. I can feel the bark digging into my back. He turns my face towards Bubba’s, I can see people dancing inside through the windows, oblivious to what is about to happen.
“No one was stopping you then, and I’m sure as heck not going to stop you now,” I tell him, and he lifts my legs higher, grounding his hips against my heat. With each grind, he’s rubbing against my clit, setting me off higher and higher. Tightly, I grab onto his shoulders and dig my nails into him, with each move he makes my nails go deeper into his flesh. He growls, and I hiss, cursing inside my mind.
“You’re melting underneath my touch, just like I knew that you would,” Butch chuckles, dipping his mouth down to my neck and biting. As he sucks on my skin and rubs more and more I’m a goner, not to mention when he slides my lace thong to the right and plunges his fingers inside of me.
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