“Go see for yourself.” In the back of my mind, I know that I shouldn’t have added any more fuel to the fire. My simple comment is just going to give Summer ammunition for when she goes to interview them. Is it wrong that I don’t care? That I’m too hurt by Miles’ comment to even give a damn on what she asks? The only thing I want to do right now is run into the city and get lost. I just want to explore, to see, and most importantly, not think about anything that just happened. After all, I’ll have plenty of time to do that when I get back home tonight.
CHAPTER 8
Once you figure out what respect tastes like, it tastes better than attention. -P!nk
Bellamy
It turns out that walking through a city that you don’t know is two things, lonely as all heck and kind of terrifying. If I was with Rocky, or Syd…or even Jase I’d be having a blast right now taking in the scenery, appreciating the history of the city. I would be living like every moment is my last, but I can’t do that right now. I have my guard up, completely unintentional, and yet it’s happening. When I think hard about it, I realize that is something that’s stuck with me since my parent’s death. I was thrown into the foster system for a bit until my uncle could pull me out, but I had to become guarded, it was the only way that I could protect myself from everything that was going on around me. The changes, the questions, and even the kids in the foster home. Being strong meant being cold, and I was really good at it for a time. In a sense, I think that maybe I still am, especially when being put in situations like I was today.
It’s been nearly three hours since I walked out of Summer’s office building fuming from what Miles said. I mean, c’mon. How dare he? I am not Kallie Hart for goodness sake! No matter what I do, I know that Miles will always look at me and see his ex who took everything from him. It’s about time that I just accept his hatred towards me. The only thing that I can do is ignore it and move on, even if it is hard for me. I’d like to think that at the end of the day that I’m a good person. So, I struggle with the fact that he hates me because I feel like if he didn’t have the history with Kallie that he did…we’d actually be friends.
That’s what upsets me the most. Kallie did a number on him, and now he hates me because of her actions. He doesn’t judge me for being me – Bellamy. He judges me because he thinks that I’m just like her.
I ended up walking my butt into a bar close to the river. The moment I saw the exposed brick through the window I knew that I wanted to check it out, and when I stepped inside my expectations were blown away. You could only see a little bit from the window out front, the entire bar gave me this industrial vibe. It made me wonder if this place was designed specifically like this, or if maybe some of the aesthetics were original to the building.
The bar top looked as if it was carved from a giant redwood from the Northern Californian forests, every vein through that tree you could see perfectly. The details were impeccable. Throughout the bar, there were metal and wooden tables matched with dark plush chairs. The hardness of the metal combined with the comfort of the chairs gave this a homey feeling, and the bar was packed with people, telling me that the customers loved it here.
I made my way up to the corner of the bar where there were a couple seats open on either side of me. This may have given me a homey feeling, but it didn’t take away the fact that I didn’t know anyone in this bar, and I’m alone.
“Can I get something for you, sweetheart?” I glance over and see a sweet blonde man with a killer smile asking me the question. He pulls out a black rag from his apron and wipes down the bar in front of me, eyes glued to mine.
“A Moscow Mule would be great.”
“Coming right up. I haven’t seen you around here, are you new to town or just passing through?” He asks, combining vodka with ginger beer and a splash of lime juice. I don’t know what it is about this drink, but I have to order it whenever I go to a bar. It’s my poison of choice, as they say.
“I’m just passing through, I’ll be here a couple days and then I’m headed off to the next big city,” I add a small laugh along with my reply, but we’re headed to Pittsburgh, Baltimore then off to Philadelphia before we take a week break and then stop in Camden, and lastly, New York City – which will be the biggest show I’ve ever done before. After that, I’ll have a sit down with Evie, and we’ll figure out the rest of my schedule. I have to go into the studio for a few weeks and finish up the last bit of my first album, which I’m still trying to decide on a name for. I’m sure once something feels right, I’ll be able to tell, but at the moment I don’t have a clue.
“What a shame, and here I was hoping you’d be in town for a little bit longer than that.” He smiles, handing me my Moscow Mule in a copper tin cup. “Say, are you busy later?”
“She’s going to be busy for a very, very long time.” My body runs cold at the sound of his voice, chills pass through every limb and my core ignites into a mighty flame.
I hear the chair to my right creak, and in it sits a lug of a man, pure muscle with tattoos starting at his jawline, going all the way down to his hands. The first thing I notice about him is the tattoos that mark his body, and then I see the scar on the left side of his face. “I’m Slash, and you must be Bellamy.” He offers his hand, riddled with metal rings and I take it, shaking.
“Yep. That would be me,” I mutter, glancing around to look at Butch, who is glaring straight at the bartender.
“We’ll take two beers, make it spiffy,” Butch orders, and just like that, the bartender goes in through the kitchen doorway, disappearing from sight.
“We’re your watch dogs, boss’s orders,” Slash tells me. I grab my mule and take a hefty sip, trying to understand what he’s telling me.
“What do you mean?”
“He’s telling you that your sister sent us out here to protect your lovely little ass, Sugar,” Butch growls, sitting down on the barstool to my left.
She had the DNA tested. This is good news. I keep having to think that, but I find it interesting that she sent these two out here but didn’t even bother to communicate with me herself.
“Protect me from what exactly? Cute bartenders?” I tease.
“Bartenders are the least of your worries. I think Elena’s more worried about the Cartel chopping you into little bits and delivering you in a trash bag on her doorstep,” Slasher says, clear as day. I gasp, not realizing just how dangerous her life is until this exact moment but then again, do I really know how dangerous her life is?
Thank God for alcohol. I grab my mule again, chugging it down until I can hear myself sucking air in through the straw.
“Which won’t happen, because we’re with you, Sugar,” Butch hisses, reaching over me and smacking Slash in the face. “What the hell is wrong with you, scaring her like that?”
“Not my fault if she doesn’t realize being related to Elena has its downsides. Bet you never had to worry about getting murdered before tonight, did you?”
I shake my head.
“Exactly!”
Butch sighs heavily next to me, just as the bartender approaches with two beers and another Moscow Mule for me. I immediately grab it, chugging it down as quickly as I can. No matter what I find out being with these two, there will not be enough alcohol to get me through it. That I can guarantee.
“You won’t put up a fight with Slash and I being your personal bodyguards, will you?” Looking over at him I shake my head, knowing that there is so much that I don’t know about. I have absolutely no experience with whatever it is that Elena and the people in her club do daily. I’m a fish out of the water so to speak, so if my sister is sending me these two, who will be in my protective detail – then I will very well take them.
“Wait! How did you two find me?” I ask, curiosity getting the best of me.
“Elena found out you were going to be in Cincinnati for a show tomorrow night, so we drove up here. Then the big guy found out you “stormed out of Summer Poole’s office building” through Twitter
, insert Slash being a computer whiz and he found an image of you going in this bar.”
Quite the investigators these two are.
“It wasn’t me. I had Lucien find you,” Slash chuckles.
“Who’s Lucien?”
“He’s a friend of a friend – who happens to be a kick ass hacker. He can do anything. Give me your phone, will you?” I hand over my phone to Slash, he puts my thumb on the sensor and taps away. Within a minute I’m handed back my phone, swiping through each screen I see that nothing has changed. “Lucien has an invisible GPS tracking app. It gives away no indication that it’s there. In the event we lose you, or you disappear, know that your phone is your lifeline. All the girls at the club have this app installed.”
“Shit, Slash! Shut your damn mouth,” Butch growls, and I can’t help but giggle.
“He’s got his panties in a twist because I shouldn’t have told you that, plus none of the girls know that it’s on their phones. Especially your sister, damn. If she knew, I could imagine the storm that would rip apart that clubhouse.” I don’t say much of anything. How can I when I don’t even know the woman he’s talking about? Eventually, I’m hoping that can change.
CHAPTER 9
Pain shapes a woman into a warrior.
-R.H. Sin
Butch
“What were you doing all alone in that bar? Shouldn’t your friends have been with you?” I ask, walking Bellamy in our hotel room. I was very adamant with her. There was no way in hell we were staying on that tour bus with the rest of those rockers. Elena was very explicit in her instructions, we were to stick to Bellamy like glue, and you can damn well bet that’s happening. Truthfully, I’d be sticking to her like glue whether Elena gave us orders to or not.
She told me that most of the time they ended up getting hotel rooms if they were staying in cities for a couple of days, but how she preferred to stay on the bus because it had a homier feeling to her. I told her we wouldn’t be staying on the bus, especially after she told me how the guys come back to write in the middle of the night and all of that. I love to do two things in the middle of the night, sleep and fuck, and not exactly in that order.
“I got into a spiff with Miles and decided it would be best if I went out on my own for a bit,” she tells me. I instantly know that she’s leaving a few things out by the way she won’t maintain eye contact with me and the mere tone of her voice.
“Which one is Miles?”
“He’s the dick,” she murmurs. I belt out a laugh and her face flushes red. “Oh crap. Sorry. Uh, you haven’t seen him yet I don’t think.”
I yank out my phone, showing her a screenshot of The Stones. “Which one is he?”
She points to the bearded guy with the ink. Interesting that he’s the dick.
“Miles is the guitarist, Syd plays bass, Rocky is the drummer, and Jase sings,” she tells me, pointing at each man as she speaks. I briefly saw Rocky and Syd at Bubba’s a few days ago. They both seemed nice. I won’t know if I like them until we come face to face, though.
“What did the dick do?” I ask, eying her down.
“He was just being a dick,” she shoots out, walking over to her bed, sitting in front of the head board. “I’m not going to tell you everything, you know, you’re a stranger.”
“A stranger that you’re sharing a hotel room with,” I add.
We both know that we’re acquaintances at best. I would no longer say that we’re strangers, and at any rate, we won’t be for long. I have a feeling that Bellamy Mason and I are about to know each other very well.
“Well, yeah.”
“A stranger that you let leave you shaking in the woods.”
“Well, yeah.”
I walk over to her, planting my arms on both sides of her legs. “A stranger, with whom you want to do a lot more with, and we both know it. So, let’s get this straight right now, Sugar. You and I are not strangers, and we’re damn well not going to be.”
“I don’t want to be in a relationship with you,” she nervously blurts out, causing me to belly laugh in front of her.
“Sugar, when in the hell did I say I wanted to date you? I want to fuck you until you can’t see straight, not court you.”
“Oh,” she murmurs, the same red travelling down to her neck. Oh, how I’ve made this one nervous.
“Did you want to date me?” I laugh, staring into her glossy eyes.
“No! I don’t know you! I…I don’t know what I want with you, okay?” She may not know what she wants, but I sure as hell do.
“I do.”
“What do you think I came there for? A quick fuck and a drink? No. I came for my sister, to finally have someone in this awful world! I am so tired of being alone,” she admits, staring at me with such a fierceness in her eyes – there was never any denying that Bellamy and Elena were sisters, but now…now I’m even surer.
“No. I think you came to Gainesville to meet your sister, and then you left, not expecting anything else. Elena takes pride in her family, so of course, when she found out that you were blood she wanted to protect you. Now you and I are where we are. I won’t hold back how much I want to rip that shirt and those sweats off you right now, or how I want to beg me to fuck you. Dammit, Sugar, you have no idea just how sweet you truly are, do you?”
Bellamy opens her mouth and then snaps it shut.
“I’m not fucking you right now, not when you look like you either want to cry or scream. What happened today? You shouldn’t have been alone in that bar, especially now,” I grumble, keeping my hands firmly planted on both sides of her.
“Why do you even care if I’m upset or not? It’s not your job to care about how I’m feeling, or about how my day went. You’re just here to make sure I don’t get killed.”
“You’re so very wrong about that. I’m here because I want to be, and there is no other reason. Sure, Elena was going to send two of us out to watch you anyway, but I volunteered to be here because I can’t get you out of my damn head. You know that? And no, it’s not my job to care about how you’re feeling, but I do. That’s just because I like you, Bellamy.” I find myself caring a little more about her than I should if I’m being honest.
For some reason, I just can’t seem to get this woman out of my damn head.
“Thank you, for caring, I mean. It’s sweet of you.”
I lean towards the left and plop next to her on the mattress, extending my left arm and tug her down next to me. She fights for a moment, ultimately giving in. “It’s not wrong for me to care. I’m human, I’d be a dick if I didn’t.”
“No. You’d be smart if you didn’t. Some people have a lot of baggage, and I’m one of those people,” she admits, with a small giggle at the end. I know it’s anything but funny.
“Try me,” I tell her. “I was left at the altar, and no one fucking knows about it except me and my ex. How’s that for baggage?” It was the worst day of my life, waiting there for the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Funny how time passes by and things that once mattered don’t anymore. I could give two shits about whatever it is that she’s now doing with her life. She made her choice, and now my life is better for it.
“What is this? A game on who’s life sucks more than the others?”
“We can make a game of it,” I admit, I’m a bit interested to see which one of us is worse off. “But we won’t. This is simply two friends talking. I suggest something else though. We each share something, every night and every morning – we tell each other something about ourselves. You said we’re strangers, and I don’t want us to be.”
“You want us to share secrets?” Bellamy asks, turning her head up on my shoulder to look at me.
I glance down at her and shrug. “I guess so.”
“My ex is trying to ruin my music career.” One sentence from her, and I immediately want to pummel the asshole who’s giving her grief. “And Miles thinks I’m just like his crazy ex-girlfriend who used him to get to the top of the industry. He bas
ically thinks that I’m the she-devil and like I haven’t worked hard a day in my entire life and it really pisses me off!”
“You aren’t the she-devil. Miles seems like he has trust issues, but don’t we all? There’s always that one person who fucks us up. Sounds like his ex was that for him.”
“Yeah, but that doesn’t give him an excuse to treat me the way he does.”
“I’m not disagreeing with you, Sugar. Just don’t let his negative attitude dull your light, got me?”
Bellamy leans up and scoots on my chest, her elbows digging into me in a very uncomfortable way. “I don’t get why you’re so nice to me. You know nothing about me, Butch, and yet your laying down on a bed with me telling me not to let Miles dull my light as if we’ve been friends for years.”
She’s not wrong. It’s pretty fucking weird. I’ve never been this nice to any woman I’ve been with. Maybe I’m being overly nice because she’s Elena’s sister, but we both know that’s a lie. I’m being nice to Bellamy because the girl caught my eye from the very first second I saw her. She has this pure, innocent aura to her. I know that I shouldn’t want anything to do with her, that I’ll ultimately corrupt her in some way, shape, or form. Is it wrong that I don’t give a damn?
Is it wrong that I want to be a selfish bastard and see what happens? Or is it even more wrong that I lied to her earlier?
I don’t just want to fuck her.
Something about this girl drives me insane, and this dark, primal part of me doesn’t want to let go.
CHAPTER 10
I love the person I’ve become because I fought to become her. -Kaci Diane
Bellamy
“Where in the bloody hell have you been, missy?” I sneak onto the bus like a teenager who was caught after being out too late with a boy the night before, and Evie sure sounds like a judgmental parent, to be honest.
“I was at the hotel. I thought Rocky would’ve told you, I’m staying with…” I trail off, not really sure how to tell Evie that my half-sister sent me two outlaw bodyguards to watch over me, so I’m not murdered and chopped into little bits by the Cartel. Yeah…I don’t think that would go over too well.
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