He did not just break up with me, did he? We’re Edge and Dolly.
I lean my head back and replay it all. Somehow, I turned out to be the bad guy.
What the fuck? I look down at my legs and seem to be shaking. I handled the Homecoming thing wrong and he misunderstood everything. In a way, I should be beyond pissed because… well, I love him. Sure, I wish he would take school more seriously so we can get out of the club, but other than that I accept him.
Someone screams and the sound of laughter and splashing comes from the back. I need to find my mom and get out of here. This was a terrible mistake. I know Edge—he gets fired up, but by tomorrow he’ll have calmed down and we can talk.
Hopping out of the Cherokee, I slam the door and shiver. I trudge toward the back area where I left my mom. It seems like hours ago.
The air is cool, and when I rub my arms, goose bumps pebble my skin. I stop for a second. Something bad is about to happen. I need to go back to the Jeep. Instead, I move forward, my fear making me shake as if my body is trying to protect me, warning me to stop.
I look around and see my mom with my dad. His arm is slung over her shoulder and she looks so proud, so pathetically happy that he’s giving her his scraps. Like a dog that loves its master, my mother stares at him. And I want to throw up. This can’t be how it’s supposed to be. There has to be more.
I scan the crowd for him. He’s the one real person I need in my life. I need to tell him that I won’t be going to Homecoming with Troy. The whole thing is so clear at this moment: it’s not worth it. I see Axel and his buddy Rhys laughing with Chuckie but no Edge. I start to walk toward Jason, but instead of doing that, I suck in small, shallow breaths as I let my mind take me where it thinks I should go. I open the sliding glass door and enter the clubhouse.
“I should stop,” I whisper. As I walk up the stairs, the sounds of laughter and screaming fade. I make my way toward a door I should not be standing in front of, toward noises and light that I shouldn’t investigate.
It’s Chuckie’s door; we all know that, but the sound of grunting makes my blood run cold.
Slowly I watch as if I’m in an eighties horror movie. With my hand on the doorknob, I open the door.
“Fuck that feels good.” I stare at the one person in the world who promised me he would never hurt me. I stare at my beautiful Edge with his auburn hair and black eyelashes that are too long for his face. He’s lying on the bed, pants around his ankles as Crystal sucks his cock.
Her fake boobs jiggle as she tastes what’s mine and all I see is red. Like wax from a dripping candle, hot rage slides across my face until my heart pounds so fast I can hear myself panting as I attack. I reach for her ugly hair and rip her head off my penis. Edge sits up, his eyes coming into focus as he jerks his jeans up.
“Mine,” I shout at the whore who is Chuckie’s girlfriend. “Mine!” I shake her head like she’s a rag doll.
“Dolly,” he yells, and I keep saying the only thing my mind can process.
Mine.
I scratch her cheeks as she screams for help like the scared bitch she is. I’m going for her eyes when a hand that is so familiar stops me. I reach down and bite it.
“Jesus, stop. Enough,” he roars.
I turn to him and snarl, “I’ll kill you. I’ll kill you both.” I thrash trying to break free. My feet connect with the nightstand and a lamp topples over.
The stupid cunt is still screaming for help, but I get one great kick in straight to her stomach and she topples to the floor gasping for breath.
Then I kick her in the face, but it’s not hard because I’m being lifted and held tightly in his arms—arms, which, an hour ago, were my future but now are my hell.
“What the fuck?” The room explodes with an energy that wasn’t in it before. I think it’s Chuckie as I twist and bite at whatever I can reach.
“Stop, Dolly. Fucking stop, baby.” His voice sounds tortured as he shakes me. My teeth snap against each other. I hear a noise. It sounds like a wild caged animal, wounded and scared. It fills the room, drowning out Edge’s soothing voice while he tries to restrain me.
“Don’t touch her,” Edge yells at someone who has my legs. He turns me to his chest and shakes me and the noise stops.
Was that sound coming from me? Everything stops. I stare in shock at what has happened.
“Fuck, baby. I’m sorry.” He grabs my hair and pulls my head next to his chest. His heartbeat sounds rapid. I whimper.
A loud pop makes both of us look up. My dad stands not three feet away holding his Glock. The ceiling is dumping all kinds of drywall on us as if we’re in a snowstorm. That’s because he shot his gun at the ceiling.
“Vice P… man, this is my room.” Chuckie looks around as if someone is going to back him up. My heart is being broken and he’s worried about a hole in his stupid ceiling?
My dad takes a step forward, his dark eyes focused on my face, then Edge, and finally Crystal who is being tended by some old ladies.
“I told you, Dolly.”
My ears are ringing. I shake my head as tears drip down my chin and say, “Mine.”
“No. This is exactly why I said no. You aren’t some club bunny. He’s not for you.”
“You have no idea, VP. I have done everything you asked,” Edge yells.
I can’t seem to stand, so I slide to the floor. In what seems like a nightmare, I watch, almost detached, as Edge’s voice fills the room.
All my dad does is shake his head. Reaching down, he scoops me up like I’m five instead of seventeen.
“Stop crying.”
“Dolly,” I hear Edge plead. I even feel him reach for me, though I think Jason is holding him back, or maybe it’s Chuckie.
“I need her. Tell her it was a mistake.” But I close my eyes, trying not to see anyone. If I can’t see them, they can’t see me.
“You happy, Misty? Why would you bring her here?” My dad sounds disgusted, almost tired when we get outside.
“I opened her eyes to what this life is like. She wants Edge, then she needs to know.”
She opens the Jeep’s door and for a second, I don’t want to let go of his neck. He’s my dad and even though he can be gruff and awful to my mom, he’s my dad and I love him.
“I have things to take care of. I don’t know when I’ll be home.” He sits me in the passenger seat, shuts the door, and glares at my mom.
“Wait, you’re leaving me to deal with this?”
“You brought her here,” he says. “Go home and be a mother, Misty.” My mom starts the Jeep and it’s then that I realize she’s crying. She reaches for my hand. I’m too raw not to hold it, too confused about what happened to pull away.
“I will never get over this,” I croak out, my throat so tight it comes out like a hiss.
“Neither will he, but don’t kid yourself. Edge will be a Disciple. You’re only his whore until he puts ‘Property of’ on your back.”
We don’t talk after that. She pulls into our driveway, opens the front door, and hands me a Valium.
“Go to bed.”
EDGE
Seventeen years old
My cheek is killing me. Licking my lips, I bolt up then brace myself as the sun blinds me and my head throbs with a pulse.
“You need a ride to school?” I stare at black biker boots and wipe my mouth with the bottom of my T-shirt.
“What the fuck? Why am I in the dirt?” I move my jaw around and try to spit the dust out.
“I’m leaving in fifteen. Clean yourself up.” Jason walks away and the screen door slams behind him.
“Christ.” I rest my head on my knees as everything plays on fast-forward. Last night. Dolly, the breakup, the fucking blow job.
“Fuck me.” I fall back onto the ground not even caring that my head’s pounding dirt and gravel.
I got caught.
It’s not my fault.
Technically we’re not together.
I was on drugs. High, on fuck knows what. “Christ,�
� I groan as I heave myself up. I’m full of shit. This is so bad. How am I going to get her back?
“Goddamn it.” I don’t need this; it was bad enough trying to deal with all of her insecurities and friend garbage. Now add this. An almost hysterical howl explodes out of me as I tilt my head up letting the sun beat down on me. My mind keeps replaying Dolly’s face. Her hands and legs, which became deadly weapons. She went insane. Like an evil little Smurf, she took Crystal out.
“Shit, how am I going to get her to forgive me?”
I force my legs to move. The smell of coffee and bacon hits my senses before I open the screen door of the Clubhouse. I need a plan, a smart plan to get her back.
A bunch of old-timers are in the corner and as I enter, they grunt and smirk into their coffee or bottles of booze.
“Jesus H. Christ, he lives,” Axel snickers as he walks over carrying a mug of coffee. If my head wasn’t throbbing, I’d punch him.
“What the fuck did I smoke last night?” I snarl at him. Suddenly I want to blame all this on Axel and that crazy shit I smoked.
He must sense this is where I’m going because he snorts and says, “Don’t even try to put your crap on me. I didn’t put your dick in Crystal’s mouth. And it was hash, you fucking pussy.” He sips his coffee looking calm and refreshed while I’m about to lose my shit.
“Here.” He tosses his key at me. “You can use my room to shower.”
I run my hand through my hair. “What do I do? Like I need your help.” And for a split second, I actually see Axel, like the real Axel.
“Christ, Edge, you got to be smart, man.” He looks around as if something or someone can help him, then sighs. “Look, if I were you I’d tell the truth. You said you were broken up. Go with that angle.” He takes another sip of coffee.
I nod, my mind already trying to find the right words. “Yeah, I’ll say that she’s the one who said she’s going to Homecoming with Troy, she’s the one who never has time, she—”
“Jesus, Edge.” He stares at me like I’m insane. “You broke up with her ass. Tell her that and shut up.”
I rub my hands through my hair again. I do need a shower. My hands are covered in dirt. “Yeah? You think that will work? I mean this is Dolly. She’s everything to me—”
Axel leans in close. “You need to grow a pair. Never say she means more than the club. Never.”
My eyes bolt to his. He’s dead fucking serious. See, this is why he is the best prospect. He’s gonna get patched in early. One day though, one day he’ll understand. At least, I have to think that. Otherwise I will start thinking I’m not worthy of the club.
“Edge, get your ass over here.” Prez’s voice makes my head ache. Reluctantly I turn to face him.
He stands with the morning sunlight behind him making him look bigger and more intimidating than ever.
Shark and Chuckie stand behind him with their arms crossed and for a split second, I wonder if they’re going to take me out like Joe Pesci in Goodfellas.
“This shit stops today. Get cleaned up and go to school. We got enough crap,” he bellows as they all trail after him into the conference room and the door slams shut.
And that’s it. I almost throw my head back and laugh. I’m in no condition for school.
Whatever. I need Dolly.
If the shit stops today, then I need to handle it. One-track-mind Dolly—that’s all I can deal with at the moment.
I take the stairs two at a time and open the door to Axel’s room. It’s surprising how clean it is.
Ripping off my dusty clothes, I start the shower, exactly what I need to clear my head so I don’t fuck this up worse.
I’m in and out in under five minutes, not even bothering to turn on the hot water. The cold shower might reduce the swelling on my face. Christ, I still feel the gravel imprints. I brush my teeth with my fingers and take a swig of Listerine.
Looking around, I realize I need clean shit. Axel won’t mind if I borrow a clean shirt. Opening drawers, I roll my eyes and mumble, “And they give me crap.” Axel’s drawers are like shopping in a Gap store. Perfect.
I grab the top one, pull it on, and eye my dirty jeans. I don’t have time, so I shake my dusty ones and check to make sure I haven’t forgotten anything.
A wave of jealousy comes over me as I look at all Axel’s guitars on the wall. They range in color and size. He always seems to have everything under control. He’s the best at whatever he sets out to do. Guitar, his band, the club. Whatever, Axel seems to thrive and not give a fuck about anything. Yet, if you need someone to have your back, there’s no one more loyal.
I know his buddy Rhys is concerned that Axel’s love for the Disciples will make him leave the band. And he’s right to be. Axel is 100 percent a Disciple; Rhys is a childhood friend, someone to hang around with.
We’re a band of brothers who would die for each other. I’ve been wanting to ask about becoming a prospect early, like Jason. But with what went down today, I guess I should focus on getting Dolly back.
There’s a knock at the door and Jason’s voice booms in, bringing me back to my shitty present.
“You ready?”
“Yeah.”
I must look better because he says, “Let’s go. I have to set the meeting up in Sun Valley with the Demons.” Even being the Prez’s kid, Jason still has to be a prospect, earn his patch.
He’s a born leader so it’s easy for all of us to follow him. I mean, everyone knows that Prez is getting ready to step down. Chuckie will be our new president, but rumors have been floating around that Jason should be our King.
We all three pile into a black Escalade. Doc stares out the window.
That saying “Don’t get high off your own supply” seems to have missed Doc because he’s like a different person from the dude I grew up with.
“I need a cigarette.”
Jason starts the Escalade, tosses me a pack of Marlboro Reds, and backs out.
I slouch into the black leather seat and light up… let the calming effects of nicotine distract me from remembering anything for as long as it can last. The ride is silent save for the tires on the road. Tossing the cigarette out the window, I see Jason’s green eyes narrow at me in the driver’s mirror.
“What?”
“What happened last night can’t happen anymore, Edge. You need to control Dolly.”
I lean back and let the morning air hit my face. “Yeah, so I keep hearing.”
“You want to be a prospect.” He shakes his head. “But you gave Shark an excuse to be a dick.”
I lean forward. “Fuck that. I have been nothing but respectful. I’ve basically been a prospect for years trying to prove myself to him. He can’t pull that shit.”
“He can and he will.” The Escalade goes over the speed bumps alerting me that I’m already at school. “You’ve got to put the club first, man. If Dolly can’t back you…” He doesn’t finish.
“The club is always first. Why do you think I’m in this fucked-up place?” I slam the door not even looking back.
“Hey brother?” Jason calls out the window. “Has it ever occurred to you that she might not want to be an old lady?” I freeze as his words melt into my skin, sinking into my bones.
At war with my subconscious and his words, I don’t turn to respond and start walking.
Maybe she doesn’t want to be an old lady…
I head straight to her locker. She’s gonna be hurt, but she’s mine, and at the end of the day, she’ll listen. She has to. I can’t accept anything else.
DOLLY
Seventeen years old
“Mom.” I wrinkle my nose. I’ve cried so much it’s hard to breathe.
“Give me five more minutes.” My swollen eyes shift to her naked body. Why can’t she wear something, even underwear, to bed? It’s not that hard.
“Don’t bother. I have a ride.” This makes her blink her eyes open and stare at me.
“What?” She leans up on her elbows. “What time is
it?” Her long dark hair looks like a rat formed a nest in it.
“Seven thirty. I’m having Troy take me this morning.” I almost choke on the word Troy, but I made my decision around 3:00 a.m. I’m done. I will go to Homecoming with him, and I will be the queen without guilt.
I don’t think I have ever felt so exhausted and it’s not only because I was up all night. It’s because my heart has been betrayed. I look down at my broken nails, which I filed this morning. In my rage, I broke them all.
I spent at least an hour in the shower in a daze, tears and shock washing over me. Not even the soothing hot water was able to stop my shaking. At long last, at 5:00 a.m. I gave up and got dressed for school. I straightened my hair and tried to make the dark circles go away. It’s pretty hopeless since I look sad, but seriously, who cares?
I’m wearing one of my favorite pairs of True Religion jeans and a lavender cashmere sweater along with some brown lace-up boots.
“Dolly?” my mom snaps.
I blink, forcing her into focus. “Yes?”
“Are you insane?”
“Probably.”
She frowns and gets out of bed. I have to say at thirty-seven she still has a great body. I hope mine stays as good as hers. Maybe it’s because she was a stripper. Seriously, she’s doesn’t have an ounce of cellulite.
She pulls on a short pink robe and lights up a cigarette. “I’ll take you. Give me a moment to get dressed.” She goes to turn, but I pick up my backpack. “He’s already here,” I say. “I wanted to let you know I’m off.”
“Wait.” She reaches for me, causing me to veer back. “Listen. This is not a joke, Dolly. You can’t fuck around here. Like if Edge finds out that you are doing this, it could be bad.” The smoke swirls around her face.
“Well, Mom, I don’t know if you know this, but I caught him with a disgusting skank so I’m not his girl anymore.” I take a breath. My face warms at those words, yet I try to convince myself that I’m okay.
I toss my hair back. “I like Troy. He’s a nice guy who cares about me.” The traitorous sting of tears makes me look up at the ceiling. It’s yellow from too much smoke.
Repent (The Disciples Book 3) Page 7
