by Aimee Said
“Hi, stranger,” said a voice behind me. I turned and saw a smile that made my stomach flutter. “I’ve been trying to catch you at school all week. Where’ve you been hiding?”
“Oh, you know, here and there.” In the toilets, mainly, but no need for Josh to know that.
“Well, I’ve missed you! Promise me we’ll do something together tomorrow night, after the competition.”
Now it was my turn to smile. I nodded, not trusting my brain’s ability to form a coherent reply when Josh was standing so close to me.
“Excellent, I’ll see you then.” He leaned forward and gave me a light kiss on the lips before heading back the way he’d come.
I watched him until he turned onto Ormond Street before heading for home. It was the warmest night since spring had sprung and the air was thick with the scent of jasmine and cherry blossom. As I’d come to expect, Josh made everything better. It was as if his kiss had erased Simon’s words, and my doubts.
For the first time since the photo emerged, I felt like there was a tiny chance that my life was improving after all.
“There’s Thai takeaway in the kitchen,” called Dad from the living room when I got home. “Larrie and I already ate, so help yourself to what’s left.”
I filled a bowl with stir-fry and noodles and went to join him on the couch. “Where’s Mum?”
“In bed – she feels like she’s got a migraine coming on, so be a good girl and don’t start any noisy fights with your sister.”
“It’s not me who starts the fights, why don’t you talk to La–”
“I don’t care who starts them, just don’t tonight, okay?”
I bit my lip and stared at the floor.
“Sorry, Al-bunny. I didn’t mean to snap at you. These exams are as stressful for the rest of the family as they are for Larrie, aren’t they? Thank God it’ll be over in a couple of weeks.”
“One week and two days.” I picked up my bowl and went to my room.
How was it possible for my life to go from looking up to worse than ever in less than thirty minutes?
I was sneaking down to the kitchen an hour later to see whether there was any pad thai left when I heard voices coming from Mum and Dad’s room. In my experience, my parents speaking in low tones behind their bedroom door meant they were talking about me, so I stopped and tuned in. I was shocked to hear Mum crying.
“Yes, I’m sure it’s Larrie they were talking about,” she said between muffled sobs. “I forgot to forward the phone when I went to make a cup of tea, so I nipped back to reception. They must’ve thought I’d be away longer because they weren’t even bothering to whisper.”
Dad’s voice was consoling. “Okay, so a couple of local gossips in the waiting room were talking about Larrie kissing someone. If they think that’s a reason to expel her, then they’re ignorant prudes. There’s no way Masch would agree to it.”
“It wasn’t about kissing someone, it was about kissing a girl. You didn’t hear how horrible they were being, Max. And if those two know about it then the whole of Kingston does.”
Dad made the soothing “ssh” noise he used to whisper in my ear when he rocked me to sleep after a bad dream. “Larrie’s only got a little while longer at Whitlam and then no one will care who she’s kissing. All we can do right now is help her get through her exams. We’ll deal with this other stuff later.”
I snuck back to my room and closed the door silently behind me.
Al Miller has lost her appetite.
31
There were four groups performing in the SkoolDaze final. Vertigo Pony was on second, which was just as well since everyone was a huge bundle of nerves. I was worried that Maz might hurl before she even made it onstage. She’d been so nervous all day that I hadn’t told her about running into Josh after rehearsal, or what I’d overheard my parents talking about.
She peeked through the curtains after we’d hung the banner, ready to be lowered at the start of Vertigo Pony’s set. “Have you seen how many people are out there? It’s at least twice as many as the stage rehearsal.”
“Calm down, Maz. It’s going to be fine.” I tried to sound reassuring, but to be honest the heaving throng of teenagers braying for entertainment was making even me nervous, and I didn’t have to get up and play for them.
We found a quiet corner in the green room and I made Maz close her eyes while I recited what I could remember of the relaxation track Patchouli had sent me.
“ … You walk to the stream and you see a small, golden fish, flickering in the water …”
“I thought I might find you here,” said Josh, coming up behind me and wrapping his arm round my shoulders. “I have to go and help my mates get ready for their set, but I’ll catch you later.”
He kissed my cheek before heading for the stage. If we’d been in a 1950s musical, this would have been the point where cartoon bluebirds flew around my head and I fainted with pleasure.
Maz had opened her eyes when I stopped talking. She watched Josh walk away, momentarily distracted from her performance anxiety. “I’ll never understand what you see in that guy. He thinks he’s such a player.”
Before I could say anything in Josh’s defence, Simon arrived carrying the last of his drum kit. He’d given in to being styled by Maz and was wearing a slim-fitting cowboy shirt that she’d ripped the sleeves off. She certainly had a talent for drawing attention to a person’s best feature.
“Nicko’s on his way,” he told Maz.
He’d barely spoken to me at school all day, even when I’d admired the finch family tree that had fallen out of his folder in Science. I prayed he’d snap out of it before Monday – once Maz didn’t have the battle of the bands to distract her, she’d be onto the tension between us in a nanosecond. In the meantime, I figured the best thing I could do was make myself scarce. “I’d better go and find a good spot out there. Good luck!”
“Fine,” Maz called after me. “Ditch us to hang out with lover boy, but if I catch you two dancing cheek to cheek to a power ballad you’re officially un-friended!”
I found Josh at the back of the hall with the same guys who were at the stage rehearsal. No one said hi, but a couple of them nodded in my direction and whispered to each other, so I figured they’d noticed me. I waited for Josh to draw me into the conversation, but he was giving a play-by-play account of the amazing goal he’d scored at training that afternoon.
When he still hadn’t noticed me five minutes later, I interrupted him. “We should get closer to the stage. I promised Maz I’d stand where she could see me.”
Something about the way he glanced at his mates before answering made me nervous. “I think I’ll hang here with the guys. But you go up the front.”
“Or I could stay here with you …” I tried not to think about how many hours I’d have to spend grovelling to Maz if I did.
“Nah, you go support your friends. We’ll catch up afterwards.”
Was it my imagination or did Josh not want to be seen with me? I was too afraid of the answer to ask him, so I headed into the crowd.
“Al, over here!” Tracy beckoned me to where she and Lily were standing near the stage, and I squeezed in next to them just as Mr Masch finished introducing the guest judges and announced the opening band.
Josh’s mates called themselves KT and the Slick Glitch. They were heavily influenced by 80s hair metal and bands that use a lot of guitar feedback. They were rubbish. I checked to see whether Josh felt as embarrassed for them as I did, but he and his friends were headbanging like they were really getting into it. Remembering the cartoon bluebirds from backstage, I told myself I could forgive Josh’s poor taste in music.
The Slick Glitch’s set felt like it went for a lot longer than five songs, possibly because of the extended guitar and drum solos, which seemed to be a competition to try to one-up each other. When they finished, I had a feeling a lot of us were clapping because it was finally over.
Ten minutes later the curtains opened to revea
l Vertigo Pony. The banner sparkled behind Maz, who was resplendent in her cat-ear tiara, tutu and combat boots. As soon as Prad played the first chord people around me began to dance, as if the beat was infectious. The hall came alive to the music.
Even if I hadn’t been president of their fan club, I’d have had to say that Vertigo Pony was a million times better than the first group. For starters, no one in the band was trying to be heard above everyone else, and their songs were more than noisenoisenoise and aggression. Plus, their performance was really professional; no one would have guessed that it was their first real gig. From the way the crowd responded I could tell I wasn’t the only one who was impressed.
When the intro to ‘You Don’t Know’ started I looked around for Josh but he wasn’t at the back of the hall any more. For a moment I thought he must be close by, getting ready to put his arms round me again for what I’d come to think of as our song. Then I spotted him on the other side of the crowd, chatting to a Year Eleven girl. He saw me and waved. I waved back, embarrassed to have been caught out playing the jealous girlfriend. Not that I was sure I was his girlfriend.
At the end of Vertigo Pony’s set the hall erupted in applause. Lily, Tracy and I whistled and cheered at the tops of our voices. Maz shaded her eyes against the stage lights and, spotting me, gave the thumbs up and a grin the size of a monster truck.
Prad clutched the SkoolDaze trophy to his chest. “I don’t believe it,” he repeated for the tenth time.
“You’d better believe it. We won. We bloody won!” Nicko threw his arm around Prad’s shoulder.
“Did you hear everyone cheering for us?” asked Simon. “It was incredible.”
“We’ve got a lot of work to do before we go to the regionals though,” said Maz, already working on a mental to-do list. “The competition’s going to be much stiffer there.”
A taxi pulled up in the car park.
“You can worry about that tomorrow,” said Prad. “Tonight we celebrate – everyone’s invited back to my place!”
“Are you coming?” asked Maz
I scanned the crowd again for a glimpse of Josh’s blond hair. “You go – the band should get there first. I’ll hop in the next cab with Tracy and Lily.”
Maz looked like she was going to protest, but the boys piled into the car.
“There’s room for one more,” said Nicko, patting the seat next to him. “And it’s got your name on it, Maz.”
“Go,” I told her. “I’ll see you there.”
“Okay,” said Maz. “But promise me that if he doesn’t turn up in the next five minutes, you’ll come without him.”
I put my hand on my heart. “I’ll be there – no one needs a party more than I do right now.”
Al Miller needs to cut loose.
32
“Shoes off!” ordered Prad when he opened the front door. “Go straight to the studio, and don’t touch anything on your way. If my parents find out I had people round while they were away, they’ll pack me off to a boys-only boarding school in the country.”
I took Josh’s hand and led him downstairs where about twenty kids from my year were already settling in. He’d apologised all the way to Prad’s for not hanging out with me at the competition, and promised to make up for it by not leaving my side for the rest of the night.
I spotted Maz sitting with Nicko and Simon on the old couch in the corner and pulled Josh over to say hi to them.
“I’m, uh, going to see if Prad needs any help,” said Simon, jumping up from the couch as if it was upholstered in piranhas.
Maz eyed Josh with suspicion. “I thought you’d be helping your mates drown their sorrows.”
“Nah, it’s always more fun hanging out with winners, isn’t it? Anyway, Al wanted to come here.” He squeezed my hand.
“Lucky us.” Maz turned back to Nicko. She obviously wasn’t going to include us in their conversation, so we went to where a larger group was sitting in a circle on the floor.
“Who wants to play a game?” asked Tracy.
Prad returned with a big bowl of orange liquid with fruit floating in it. “Are we talking Scrabble or strip poker?”
“How about truth or dare?”
“An excellent choice,” said Prad. “I happen to have whipped up a batch of Doctor Chandarama’s Truth Serum.”
He dipped a plastic cup into the bowl and gave it to Tracy, who took a swig and pulled a face. “What’s in it?”
“A little of this, a little of that, a splash of whatever my parents won’t miss, and a tin of fruit cocktail for vitamin C. Who’s up for a dose?”
Prad filled more cups and Tracy handed them out. Josh took two.
“I don’t recommend that,” said Simon when I accepted the cup Josh offered me. “I saw what went in there and it’s pretty nasty.”
“I think Al can make that decision for herself,” Josh said, downing his drink in two gulps. “Whoo, that’s not bad!”
“Al,” pleaded Simon. “Seriously, all that stuff’s good for is cleaning floors.”
I rolled my eyes. “Can’t you relax for once? If anyone deserves to loosen up a little right now, it’s me.”
I followed Josh’s lead and took a big sip of the punch. It definitely tasted like medicine.
I forced my grimace into a smile for Simon’s benefit. “Delicious.”
“Are you playing?” asked Tracy.
Ordinarily, I would have said no – truth or dare at teenage parties is like mums racing to the dance floor when they hear the opening bars of “Nutbush City Limits” at a wedding reception: a cliché that can only end badly – but before I could answer Josh had pulled me to sit in the circle.
He topped up my drink. “This is going to be fun.”
Lily went first and chose truth.
“Okay,” said Prad. “Answer honestly: who do you think is the hottest guy at Whitlam?”
Lily blushed and rolled her eyes towards the ceiling.
“Come on, fess up,” encouraged Prad.
“Um. Josh, I guess,” Lily said finally.
Josh chuckled and saluted her with his drink. “Cheers, Lily. You’re not bad yourself.”
Prad’s grin disappeared. “Okay, pretty boy, you’re up. Truth or dare?”
“Dare,” said Josh without pausing to consider the two options.
“You’re a brave man, Turner. I dare you to stick your nose inside my sneaker and hold it there for no less than ten seconds.”
There were protests from those of us who were familiar with the stench of Prad’s sneakers. It was stomach churning enough being in the same room when he took them off, having your nose inside one was olfactory suicide.
Josh was unmoved by our warnings. “Bring it on,” he told Prad, who leaped up with a grin and climbed the stairs two at a time.
He reappeared a minute later, holding one of his shoes at arm’s length. Josh snatched it and put the sneaker up to his face. I had to close my eyes. The sight of Prad’s shoe so close to someone’s nose made me queasy (although that could have been the punch hitting my empty stomach). Lily and the others in the circle counted down slowly from ten. I opened them at “zero” to see Josh throw the sneaker across the room in triumph.
“Hey, watch where you’re throwing stuff!” yelled Maz.
By my turn I’d finished another cup of punch and was feeling more relaxed than I had in weeks, but I was alert enough not to risk having to answer a question about Larrie.
“I’ll take a dare.”
“Okay,” said Prad. “I dare you to … pash a chick.”
“What?”
“I said, I dare you to kiss a girl.”
I expected Josh to protest that I shouldn’t be kissing anyone except him, but all he said was, “Go on, Al. It’s only a bit of fun.”
“What are you worried about?” asked Prad.
“Nothing, but …”
“You’re scared you’ll enjoy it?” suggested Lily.
I tried to hide my panic. “I just don’t wan
t to. Besides, who would I kiss?”
“I’ll kiss you,” offered Tracy.
“Problem solved,” said Prad, taking Tracy’s cup and mine and filling them both to the brim.
“Cheers.” Tracy drained her cup and I followed suit.Then she knelt in front of me. “It’s okay, Al, kissing’s fun whoever it’s with.”
“And there’s nothing hotter than two chicks kissing,” added Josh.
“I, uh …” I searched my mind for a way out of the situation, but the best excuse I could think of was that I had a contagious disease, which I figured wouldn’t go down too well with Josh. Meanwhile, Tracy’s face was moving closer to mine.
Over her shoulder, I saw Simon’s eyes widen. “It’s just a stupid game, Al. Don’t let them force you into doing anything you don’t want to.”
“What’s your problem, Lutz?” asked Josh. “We’re just having fun.”
My eyes flashed from Simon to Josh. What was more important to me: taking the moral high ground or proving I wasn’t a prude? When my lips met Tracy’s there was a chorus of approval. I opened my eyes for a second to see how Josh was reacting. His grin told me I’d made the right choice.
I knew Tracy was an experienced kisser, but I was still a little surprised at how, well, good she was at it. Unlike the guys I’d kissed, Tracy wasn’t at all slobbery, and she didn’t flick her tongue around like a snake, which seemed to be the technique all teenage boys acquired. Tracy’s kisses were gentle but persistent, and even though no other part of our bodies touched, I felt more intimately connected to her than I had to anyone I’d kissed in the past, including Josh.
I was kind of lost in the moment, so I was surprised when Tracy pulled away from me without warning. My eyes shot open in time to see her get up and take a bow as the others clapped and whistled. I put my hands up to my face to try to hide my burning cheeks.
“Are you sure you’ve never done that before?” asked Prad. “Because you looked like pro.”
Lily and a couple of the others echoed their agreement, but Josh put his arm around me protectively. “Come on, Al was a good sport. Now it’s someone else’s turn. Prad: truth or dare?”
