The Matron

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by Kirsten Osbourne


  Tino looked over at Cassie wondering why she was so far away from him. "I think they did well. What did you think of traveling on a bus? I assume it's the first time you've done it."

  "It was interesting. I'm amazed at how fast we were able to travel. Why we must have been going fifteen miles per hour." Cassie had only dreamed of such high speeds.

  He laughed. "It was right about ten. Automobiles can go much faster, but the buses only go ten miles per hour at their top speed."

  "I'm just amazed that anything can go that fast."

  "I do think it's a good idea that you have lunch ready for tomorrow. It'll be nice not to have to spend so much time on our break. I hate wasting daylight." He had a lead on his brother in Texas, and he wanted to get there quickly.

  Cassie smiled. "You must always work outdoors. It's never bothered me to waste daylight, because there's always work to be done inside."

  Tino shrugged. "I've worked both inside and outside. I do whatever needs to be done whenever it needs to be done."

  "So you don't really have a steady job?" He didn't seem like a man who would be content to travel around where the jobs took him. He seemed so much more level headed than that to her.

  "I spent the last twelve years searching for my younger brother. I do whatever work I can find and travel where the search takes me. There's always a job to be found no matter where I go." He shrugged. As much as he'd like to put down roots and settle down, he just couldn't do it yet.

  Cassie frowned. "How did you lose your brother?"

  "I didn't exactly lose him. My mother left me on someone's doorstep when I was six. I have vague memories of a younger brother named Sebastian. I've been trying to find him ever since I was old enough to leave home."

  "Oh that's sad! Do you know why your mother abandoned you?"

  He shook his head. "I remember her being ill, but I'm not sure what was wrong. I was young."

  "Have you thought of looking for your mother?" She couldn't understand why he searched for his brother but not the woman who had given birth to him. Maybe the brother was still with her.

  "I found her grave not long after I started searching. She died when I was seven."

  "I'm sorry to hear that." Cassie wasn't surprised by his story, because she'd seen so many orphans come through the home. Their stories were always interesting...and sad.

  He shrugged. "It was a long time ago."

  "But you still want to find your brother?"

  Tino nodded. "He's the only family I have."

  "Who raised you?"

  "I was left on the doorstep of the wealthiest people in town. They raised me. They treated me like family for the most part."

  "For the most part?"

  "Yes, for the most part. They were an older couple, and their children were already raised. I was treated as a family member as long as none of their real grandchildren were around." It was better than most orphaned children had, he realized. He wasn't given the nicest clothes, but he got good clothes. He was even treated with love and respect.

  Cassie sighed. "At least you were usually treated as a member of the family. So many people would have dumped you off somewhere else. I'm glad you had a family."

  Tino shrugged. "Oh, I am too! The woman who raised me died five years ago. I felt bad that I wasn't with her when it happened."

  "And the man?"

  "He died while I was still in school. I've been alone since I finished school." Never had he wanted that to change. Finding his brother had become a mission, and he didn't know what he would do once he found him. He had some good leads on where he was, and part of the trip to Texas would be investigating some of those leads.

  "I'll pray that you find him." Cassie had had no siblings, but she couldn't imagine what it would be like to suddenly lose one.

  "What about you? Do you have family?" Tino found he wanted to know everything about her.

  Cassie shook her head. "Only the children. My father died while I was a child, and my mother died a few years back. I lost my husband to a hunting accident not long after we were married. I've been alone ever since." She smiled. "At least I've had the children to keep me grounded. I don't know what I would've done without them."

  "I guess they're more than a job to you."

  "They're everything to me. Without them I don't know that my life would have any kind of purpose. It's certainly not how I imagined I would be living when I was growing up, but I'm content." Content was such a mild word for what she felt for the children. She didn't think she could love any of them more had she given birth to them herself.

  Tino frowned. Why he felt jealous of the children, he didn't know. He'd only known her for twenty-four hours, but already he wanted her to be a big part of his life. He couldn't ask a woman to live as he did. "Are you worried about what life will be like once you get to Texas? Do you have any idea what the house they purchased for you is like?"

  "None whatsoever. And yes I am worried. How can I not be? My whole world is turned upside down with this." She shrugged. "At least I'll still have the girls."

  He looked at her by the light of the campfire, and she looked beautiful in the dim light. He wanted to reach out to her, to stroke her arm, but he didn't know how she'd react. They'd known one another for such a short time, but already his feelings were growing for her. "Do you ever get lonely?"

  "How can I get lonely? I'm constantly surrounded by children." She laughed. "Sometimes I wish I had time to be lonely."

  "Don't. Being lonely isn't something I'd wish on my worst enemy." He stared into the fire for a moment. "I'm surprised you never remarried. You're still young." And beautiful, he thought. Why hadn't she remarried?

  She sighed. "At first, I wasn't ready. That's why I started working with the children. Now, it's more that I don't know anyone. When you spend all your time with children, there's no time for any adults."

  He eyed her. "Do you think you'd be open to marriage again if you met the right man?"

  She shrugged. "Probably. But he'd have to be all right with me spending time with the children. I can't imagine life without them now."

  He sighed. "I'm sure you can't. They've been part of your life for a long time." He laid down on his side on the blanket facing her. "I'm sure some of them have grown and moved on. Are you still in contact with them?"

  "Most of them. Most settled in and around Orlan. Those that didn't write frequently. I've only lost touch with one or two." The ones who came to her as older teens didn't feel as connected to her.

  "Are you satisfied? Is it enough for you?"

  "Yes and no. I'd love for all of them to come every single week to see me, but I understand that's not realistic. Some have moved West and started their own families." Cassie missed each and every one of them.

  Tino frowned. "If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?"

  "Wherever the children are."

  "You don't want to have children of your own? You'll never get them if you have no man in your life." Tino had never met a woman who didn't want children. She spent so much time around other people's children, he couldn't imagine that she didn't want some of her own.

  Cassie sighed. "Of course I do. But I'm thirty-six. Not many women start a family that late in life."

  "I don't know why not."

  She laughed. "If I had a child tomorrow I'd be in my fifties by the time they were grown. Doesn't that seem too old?" Sometimes she thought it did, but sometimes she didn't care.

  Tino shrugged. "You're obsessed with age. You seem healthy. Isn't that what really matters?"

  Cassie laughed. "It's awfully late for philosophical discussions. We need to be up early. I'd better get to bed." She got to her feet, brushing off her skirt.

  He nodded. "I've really enjoyed talking to you. We'll have to do this again. Why don't I walk you to your front door?" he said with a grin.

  She shook her head on a laugh. "Oh, that would be lovely!" She couldn't help but laugh as he got to his feet and offered h
er his arm, walking in the direction of the tent he put up for her.

  When they reached the tent she turned to him. "Thank you for seeing me to my door, sir. I had a lovely evening." The amusement in her voice was apparent.

  He stroked her cheek with one finger. "You're joking, but this is the best night I've had in a long time. Thank you for spending it with me."

  Before Cassie had time to respond, he leaned down and pressed his lips against hers. She was startled. Never had she imagined a man like him would be interested in her. "Good night."

  She lay in the dark for more than an hour, her lips still tingling from his kiss. This trip was certainly turning out to be different than she'd expected.

  Chapter Five

  That first night set a pattern for the evenings to come. After the girls were in bed, Cassie would meet Tino at the fire. They would talk for an hour or so, and he would walk her to her tent. He didn't try to kiss her again, but every night she wondered if he would. She wasn't sure if she wanted him to or not.

  They had been on the road for a week when Cassie got a scare. She and Tino were sitting by the fire after the children had gone to bed as usual, when Opal came rushing out of the tent the eight older girls were sharing.

  "Mrs. Morgan! Ruby's missing! She went into the woods to relieve herself, and she never came back. I've looked everywhere. I can't find her!" Opal sounded panicked.

  "She couldn't have gone far!" Cassie said. She looked at Tino. There hadn't been another adult around for her to rely on for a long time. Yes there had been volunteers who helped at the orphanage, but none would help make any real decisions. "Tino, we need to find her!"

  Tino was already on his feet. "I'll get some lanterns. You two wake the other girls."

  Cassie ran toward the tent of the younger girls. "Girls, wake up!"

  Teresa sat up rubbing her eyes. "Mrs. Morgan? What's wrong?"

  "Ruby's missing!" Cassie told her. "Get up quickly! We need to find her!"

  The girls got to their feet as quickly as they could. "How do we find her in the dark?" Dorothy asked.

  "Tino—I mean, Mr. Hayes, went to get some lanterns. We'll divide into groups."

  The girls all gathered around the campfire. Opal had woken the older girls. Cassie looked at Evelyn. "We'll divide into four groups. Evelyn, you take Opal, Penelope, Betsy, and Hope. You girls search to the north." She turned to Gertrude. "Gerty, you take Sarah Jane, Minnie, and Alice. Search to the west. I'll take Martha and Dorothy. Teresa, Hattie, and Katie, you girls go with Mr. Hayes."

  Tino had walked up behind her. "We'll take the south." He handed each group leader a whistle. "Blow that when you find her. We'll all meet back here as soon as we hear the whistle."

  Everyone rushed off in the direction they'd been given with their group. Cassie hurried to the east with Martha and Dorothy. Martha seemed particularly nervous. "What if we can't find her?"

  Cassie refused to even think about it. "We'll find her! I'm sure she just wandered off and got lost." Deep down she wasn't so sure. She worried that Ruby had tried to head back to New York to be with David. How she thought she'd find her way to him Cassie didn't know. They were already in Kentucky, in the mountains, and she worried for the girl. Hopefully they'd find her before an animal did.

  *****

  Tino felt out of place with the three young girls placed in his care. As they walked, they all called Ruby's name over and over. The girls had only gone to bed two hours before, so he was certain she couldn't have gotten far. Cassie had told him that she had a beau back in New York, and he wondered if she tried to go back to him.

  He probably should've offered to take the north, but she would expect them to search in that direction. She seemed smart to him, so maybe she'd gone a different way.

  They been searching for about ten minutes, when Katie put her hand on his arm and whispered, "Listen!"

  He stopped, and he heard it too. There was a slight crinkling of leaves coming from their right. "Stay here, girls!" He slowly walked in the direction of the sound, the lantern held high in front of him. He wasn't sure if it was an animal or Ruby, so he was wary.

  When he got close, he found the girl, her back to a tree with tears streaming down her face. "Ruby, are you all right?"

  Ruby nodded. "I just want to go home!"

  Tino sighed, opening his arms wide. Ruby rushed into them, burying her face in his shoulder. "It's going to be all right. We'll be in Texas soon. You don't have a home in New York anymore." The words were harsh, but the compassion in his voice seemed to get through to her.

  Tino passed the whistle behind him to Katie who blew it, while he held Ruby as she cried. After a moment, when she showed no signs of stopping, he pulled away. "We need to get back to camp. Everyone's worried about you."

  Ruby swiped at her tears with her sleeve. "I didn't mean to worry everyone! I just—I don't want to go to Texas!"

  "I understand. You have a beau back in New York, don't you?"

  Ruby nodded. "David. I miss him so much!"

  "I know you do. He'll wait for you. You're worth it. And if he doesn't? Then he's not worth anything." Tino wrapped his arm around the girl's shoulder. "You can write him as soon as we get to Texas, and I'm sure he'll write back."

  Ruby sniffled. "I hope so!"

  "If he's smart, he will!"

  Ruby giggled. "I wish we hadn't had to leave New York."

  "I know." Tino steered her back towards camp. "Changes like this are hard. Especially when you don't know they're coming. I think you girls should have been given more time to prepare."

  By the time they got back to camp, everyone else was waiting for them. Cassie rushed toward them, relief etched all over her face. She grabbed Ruby in a tight hug, holding her close. "Don't ever scare me like that again!"

  Ruby looked down in embarrassment. "I didn't mean to scare anyone. I just wanted to go home."

  Cassie sighed. "And you thought you could walk all the way back to New York? You know we've come about seven hundred miles, right?"

  "I guess I wasn't really thinking. I miss David." Ruby looked down, obviously ashamed of running off.

  "I'm sure he misses you too. You can write to him as soon as we get to Texas."

  Ruby looked at Tino who was herding the other girls back to their tents. "That's what Mr. Hayes told me, too."

  "Mr. Hayes is a smart man." Cassie looked at Ruby seriously. "Will you promise me that you won't try anything like this again? I want your word on it, Ruby."

  Ruby sighed. "I promise. I realized how stupid it was to even try while I was wandering around alone. I was so scared, Mrs. Morgan. I'm sorry!" Her last words were a wail.

  Cassie smiled. "I think that's punishment enough. This time." She left it unspoken that a punishment would occur if there were other problems. "Go back to bed."

  Ruby rushed off to the tent she shared with her sister and the other older girls. As soon as she was gone, Cassie walked back to the campfire, knowing it would be a while before she could sleep.

  Tino came back from the woods and joined her at the fire, sitting much closer than she was used to. He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. "Are you all right?"

  Before she knew it, Cassie was crying into his shoulder. "I was so scared." What would she have done if Ruby had been injured? Or lost to them altogether? Or worse?

  "I know." He stroked her hair, doing his best to calm her. He'd never had a sobbing female in his arms before, and now twice in one night he'd had to calm one. This trip was changing him in more ways than he'd imagined.

  After a minute, Cassie pulled away from him, using the handkerchief he handed her to wipe her tears. "Thank you. I didn't even know I needed to cry until you asked me that."

  He smiled, stroking her cheek with one finger. "Have you cried at all since you were kicked out of your home and sent to another state?"

  She shook her head. "I don't cry much."

  "Maybe it was time."

  "Thank you for finding my
girl." She was surprised at how well he'd handled the situation. She knew that she and the girls were just a job to him, but he'd acted as if finding Ruby really mattered to him.

  "I couldn't leave her out there alone," he said, surprised that she felt the need to thank him. "She's my responsibility too."

  "Your job is just to drive us, not to care for the girls. That's my job."

  "Well, it's a job we'll share until I leave you in Nowhere." He frowned, hating the idea of leaving her and the girls. He knew he couldn't ask her to wait for him, though. Texas was still populated with more men than women, and she would be married in no time if she wanted to be.

  "What's wrong? Why are you frowning?" Cassie had never seen him upset or angry.

  "I hate the idea of leaving you," he said simply.

  "Really?" Why would he not want to leave her?

  "Really." He reached out and caught the back of her neck, pulling her close for his kiss.

  The one kiss they'd shared before had been a simple brush of his lips across hers, but this one showed his need. He pressed her close to him, his mouth taking possession of hers. His tongue stroked along the seam of her lips, asking for entrance.

  Cassie wrapped her arms around Tino and held him close, kissing him back with every bit of passion she felt for him. Her hands stroked his muscled shoulders as she pressed close.

  His hand moved around to cup her breast through her dress, and she let out a low moan, finally pulling away. "We can't! Any one of the girls could come out and see us."

  He knew she was right. On three different nights one of the girls had wandered out of the tent and talked to them for a moment on their way to the woods to answer nature's call.

  He took deep gulping breaths, his passion stronger for her than he had ever felt. "I need you, Cassie."

  Cassie stared into his eyes with surprise. "I—I need to go to bed." She jumped to her feet. "I'll see you in the morning." Hurrying to her tent, she got into her bed and curled into a ball on her side. She'd never imagined she would feel the kind of passion she'd felt for Stanley for another man. Was she betraying him?

 

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