by Jolene Perry
Suddenly Bree is at my side, looping her arm through mine. “You’re not in heels.” She laughs, the alcohol smell burning my nose. “You should be faster.”
“I suck.”
“You’re clumsy, but I love you anyway.” She laughs again and grasps my arm tighter. She doesn’t feel like Bree holding me. She feels like someone else has taken over Bree’s body. Will she go back to feeling like she used to?
“So, are we…okay?” I ask.
Bree laughs a little. She’s been drinking enough that she doesn’t answer, but I think we’ll at least be talking again. So it was for sure worth the humiliation when I apologized to Bryce—if she’s still the same Bree. But she has to be, I think. Somewhere. She’s just distracted.
Darkness presses around us as we walk over the dry, uneven ground toward the old mill. Even this high up, the ocean below rushes over the rocks and sand in patterned waves of music, but I can’t see the water except for the small stripe where the moon reflects.
Hartman walks on my right, and I should be glad I’m here with Bree and watching out for her, but I’m dying to know more about Hartman’s revelations and his girlfriend and his trip and probably a few things I haven’t thought of yet.
The hearse’s headlights light up the brick building and the two large, open garage doors. Well, open might be a bit of a misrepresentation. I think they’re busted out. The warehouse is only two stories tall, but the second-story floor is super high because the old factory equipment required a lot of height. So much of the machinery is still here, left to rust away on the main floor.
This is not a good idea.
Bree leaves my side and grasps Bryce’s arm.
He reaches over and grabs her chest in a joke. My jaw clenches.
“Come on, Gabe!” Bree yells over her shoulder.
“I’m right here,” I say next to her and she jumps, starting another round of laughter.
“You are right here!” she squeals.
We pause in the doorway, and Theo pulls out a flashlight. The rest use their phones.
Bree shouts, “Hello!” into the building, and her voice echoes back to us.
“It’s too dark to see,” I say to Bree, hoping I’m quiet enough for the others not to hear.
Our pathetic phone flashlights scan in as many directions as there are people, but the light reflects in strange patterns through and around the bits of rusted equipment. No one could possibly have a clear picture of what’s inside.
“Are you sure it’s safe?” Meghan asks as she clings to Theo more tightly. “I haven’t been here in a while.”
Jessica takes two steps forward and stops, squinting into the blackness.
“I agree,” I say more loudly. “Let’s come back tomorrow.”
Jessica looks over her shoulder. “If we go slow, we should be able to explore at least a little.”
Someone needs to be sane tonight. I grab Bree’s arm, and her brows tug down. “Please just hang with me for a few?” I ask. “Let them go in and have their fun? Please.”
“You’re paranoid.” Bree shakes her head. “We’re just going to poke around a little. No biggie. The worst thing that might happen is my dress will get dirty. Promise.”
“I’m not paranoid.”
“Gabe. Seriously.” She leans toward me, her eyes swimming in whatever she just drank. “We’re just walking around. This is another typical Gabe thing, and I’m not going to miss out because you worry too much.”
“I just…” But she’s probably right. I’m being paranoid. Her dress will get dirty. Maybe they’ll all sober up in there a little. I could air out the hearse a bit before heading for home. “Please be careful, okay?”
“Let’s explore!” Bryce yells into the building. The sound of his voice doesn’t echo back, but disappears into the massive space.
He runs into the dark without a look back.
“Bryce!” Bree yells. Nothing but his footsteps until they go silent.
Theo and Jeremy take another step inside but pause.
“Bryce!” Hartman yells this time.
He screams from somewhere inside, and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. My body tenses, ready to run.
“Help!” Bryce yells. “My leg!”
“Bryce!” Bree screams before running in, followed immediately by Jeremy and Theo.
Hartman shakes his head.
Bryce’s raucous laughter fills the warehouse. “Suckers!”
“Asshole,” I mutter under my breath.
I step back. I’m not going in there, especially if he’s going to pull stupid crap like that. Meghan and Jessica smile at each other before stepping into the dark together.
Am I a hopeless wimp? I’m not sure I care right now.
“You wanna walk with me?” Hartman asks.
I peer inside the warehouse and back at the car.
“There’s a group. They know how to reach us if they need anything.” He wraps his hand around mine again.
He’s right. They’re fine. Bree’s right too. I’m being paranoid. I’m also dying for more information from Hartman. I should maybe stay here, but for what? To watch my friend act crazy?
We start back to the car, and I wait for him to talk.
“I think there’s a walkway down to the beach off the highway here.” Instead of moving toward the front of the car, he goes to the open doors in the back. “There was a sign near the turnoff.”
“After we go down the hill,” I say.
Hartman looks up toward the warehouse with a smile. “The hill wasn’t that big, and standing around in the dust and dirt doesn’t seem all that great.”
“You don’t like the dirt, but you want to go find sand?”
Hartman pulls a small blanket out of the back. “Walking on the beach in formal wear is romantic gold, Gabe!” He laughs a little, and I wonder if he joked this much before he lost his dad. I like it. “Good to bring a blanket so we can sit without ruining clothes, though, right?”
“Yep. And I’ll try not to trip.”
He holds his arm out for me. “I’ll hold you up.”
I snuggle into his side, and we start down the hill. I take one last glance at the old building we’ve lit up with the hearse headlights and walk with Hartman into the dark.
Chapter 23
We’ve hiked down the hill, and Hartman was right. It wasn’t nearly as big as it felt when we were bumping our way up.
“Now across the road and down the steps over here.” He points. “I saw the signs when we turned onto the dirt road.”
“The beach is a big deal, huh?” I ask.
“The beach in Connecticut is like…It’s not like here.”
That I can understand. I can’t imagine anywhere having beaches like here, but then, I do love where I live.
“So. I want to tell you everything,” Hartman says as we start down the stairs that are drilled into the rock face, but then he doesn’t continue.
We walk in silence for a moment.
“Okay,” he says as we continue slowly stepping down. “I didn’t think this would be so hard to get out.”
“It’s okay.” What could be this huge? And should I be relieved that his distance hasn’t been all about me or worried? I’d know if Bree and I had been talking. Maybe we’ll go back to how we were, and I’ll have her help again. Hartman flicks on the flashlight from his phone, and instead of feeling my way down each step, I can just make out the edges of each step.
“I had a girlfriend. Back in Connecticut.”
“You said.”
“We’d been together for so long that we just were, and for months before my dad died, I was trying to figure out how to go back to being friends with her, but not be dating anymore.
“I’m super…I kind of suck at…” He pauses for a moment. “I was scared about what would happen if we broke up. I distanced myself from her when Dad died, and we split before I left Connecticut. We haven’t talked since I moved, so I was right. I lost her as a friend when
I broke up with her. And I wanted to fix that, but I felt myself starting to fall for you, and I really didn’t want to miss out on a chance with you. I didn’t know how to try to be friends with my ex-girlfriend while also trying to find a way to ask you out.”
I clutch his hand tighter and keep following him down the stairs.
“She called me on Dad’s birthday, the day after I kissed you.” Hartman stops and turns to face me. With him a step lower, we’re almost face to face.
“Oh.”
“It was a terrible day for me, and it made both Mom and I realize how hard Christmas and holidays and everything were going to be this year because him being gone is all new.” He blinks a few times.
“When Mom and I made it to Connecticut, my ex-girlfriend came to see us at my aunt’s house right away.”
I can’t even open my mouth to pretend like I know how to respond.
“I told Ilana about you, and…”
“Ilana? Sounds exotic.” I’m petty. The only comment I’ve made is about the girl Hartman left behind.
“Jewish,” he says before tucking a few stray strands of hair over my ear. “I think she was a little upset, but I also think that I’m friends with her now. Sort of. So don’t worry. You know. About how I might still feel about her, because…because I’ve really been in a friendship place with her for a long time. My mom’s sad, but she’ll be okay eventually. I’m sad, but I’ll be okay and I’d really like to spend time with you. And that was a lot of words that I was panicking over trying to get out.”
Hartman shifts and then releases my hand, tapping on his phone and handing it to me. “I want you to know I’m okay with you seeing everything we texted about. I want you to trust me.”
Texts with Ilana fill the screen. I hand him the phone back without more than a glance. Those aren’t for me, and I’m not going to be the girl who would read something so personal.
He stares at his phone. “You sure? I don’t want you to think I’m hiding anything from you, but Ilana and I are close.”
“Are you okay?” I ask quietly, really not needing to see his phone.
“I’m still getting used to the idea that I won’t see my dad again. That a part of me is moving on, and that I don’t want to feel guilty about that, but sometimes I do want to feel guilty about that. Moving on feels like moving away from him, and that’s still hard.
“For weeks after he died, I’d wake up in the middle of the night terrified they made a mistake and he was buried alive. I keep thinking that being around death will help. Understanding what happened to my dad before he was put in the ground will help. I’m sorry because there’s a part of me that used you, but I was more curious about you than where you lived.”
I can’t stop staring. Absorbing.
“When I’m around you, I feel…” He turns his phone flashlight back on. “Happy. And then I feel like my dad’s dead, and I don’t deserve to be happy.”
I lean forward and touch my lips to his cheek.
Hartman holds my gaze as I pull away. “I should have told you. About Ilana and my mom and actually talked to you while I was gone. I just didn’t have stuff sorted in my head yet. It’s taken me this long to find a way to say everything I wanted to say. Because girls are scary.” He chuckles a little.
I think about my humiliation in thinking he might have changed his mind about me, and then think about what he’s been through.
His lips press lightly into my cheek, sending warmth racing through me. “I’m sorry. I’m sure you’re thinking I’m a terrible idea right now.”
“No.”
His brows are wrinkled in confusion or contemplation or…He leans forward, touching his lips to mine. This wave of calm mixed with tingling energy floats through me as our lips touch again. And then again. And again.
Hartman’s smile is soft as he slowly backs away.
“Beach?” I ask.
He nods before continuing down the stairs. The salty air fills my lungs, and the familiarity of that helps smooth over the newness of Hartman. Once my shoes touch sand, I stop. “Best to take your shoes off now.”
“Sure?” he asks.
“When we leave, our shoes won’t be filled with sand, so we’ll only need to clean off our feet.”
“Spoken like a pro.”
We take a moment, and with the water and moonlight, I can actually see him better now that we’re down here. He turns off his flashlight and tucks his phone back into his jacket.
The road is too far above for me to even know if a car passed by, and the music from the ocean has turned into rhythmic roaring that drowns out everything but us.
He drops my hand and squints into the darkness. “Now I get why people always want a fire on the beach.”
“I don’t want to leave Bree for too long, and we didn’t bring any wood.” There’s only driftwood sometimes, and with the number of people that come down to these little sections of beach, there’s rarely any of that available. Also, I’m pretty sure it’s illegal to burn.
Hartman spreads out the blanket and sits.
My dress rustles as I find a place to sit, and I wiggle a little to create a nice dent for my bum in the sand. Hartman crosses his legs and leans forward, taking my hand in his.
His dark eyes soften. He’s closer. Closer. Grapes.
Our lips touch and sends rippling waves through my body. His lips part a little, so I follow his lead. Our lips come together again, only now they’re stacked. A Hartman lip. A Gabe lip. A Hartman lip…
This time when he pulls away, the sliding of his lips sends tingles up my spine. Our tongues slide together, but then we once again get that lip slide, and I scoot closer. Our knees touch, and he feels like fire—the good kind.
I reach up and tuck my hands behind his neck. This time there’s no starting or stopping kisses, because this is just all one big heavenly kiss on this heavenly blanket on this perfect beach.
He smiles as he backs away, but our faces are still so close we almost touch.
I suck in a huge breath because I think I forgot to breathe, and my smile cracks apart all the tension I’ve been keeping in my body for the last few days. Hartman tugs me closer, shrugging out of his jacket and resting it over my shoulders.
Pulling me carefully so I can rest my back on his chest, Hartman wraps his long limbs around me and plants another kiss on my temple. “This is pretty perfect.”
“Agreed,” I whisper.
His chin sits on my shoulder, and his cheek rests against mine for a minute as my spinning head wraps itself around the idea that he kissed me. I kissed him. We kissed. And it was really, really good.
Chapter 24
I don’t know how long Hartman and I sit together listening to the waves, making random comments, and occasionally kissing, but my body aches when we stand, so I’m thinking a long time.
Hartman stretches and yawns. “They might be done exploring that old place by now.”
“At least they have the car if they need it,” I say.
We brush the sand off our feet, and the faintest hint of light touches the edges of the mountains behind us. How long have we been gone?
After slipping on our shoes, we walk up the stairs.
“Thanks for giving me a second chance, Gabe.”
“Thanks for wanting one.”
He squeezes my hand, and I stop, turning to face him. Hartman’s mouth quirks into a smile as I step closer and slip my arms around his neck. He’s one step down and still taller than me. I kiss him, slow and soft and deep. His hands tighten on my waist, our bodies touch, and the world spins beneath my feet. I understand a little more why Bree wanted this kind of distraction—even if it was from Bryce.
Hartman pulls away enough for the world to right itself, and we continue up the stairs, which end far too soon. The beach, which felt magical a few moments ago, is now just another place.
He glances both ways before we jog across the quiet highway and hit the trail up to the warehouse.
A car s
lowly bumps its way down the hill, and I can’t tell what it is, but it’s for sure not the hearse—too small.
“Did the group invite anyone else?” Hartman asks.
I shake my head before answering, “No, well…not that I know of.”
We step off the side of the small trail-like road and into the brush.
Hartman squints. “Is that…”
My chest drops. “A cop car.”
“Do you think they got in trouble?” he asks. “I don’t know who would care if we’re out here.”
I hold my breath as the car stops next to us because they might care, and for sure the cops will care since the rest of the group has been drinking. And part of the reason I even drove Bree and the group was to help her stay out of trouble.
The cop’s window rolls down. “Is one of you Gabriella Osborn?” he asks.
My knees nearly buckle. “That’s me. Yeah.”
The cop’s dark eyes bore into me, making me shrink behind Hartman. “The hearse is registered to your parents?” he asks.
“The hearse?” I ask. “Yeah…” Whatever Bryce did to get the cops called out here, I’m gonna kill him.
“What’s happening?” Hartman steps forward.
The guy looks back and forth between us—me still warm inside Hartman’s jacket, Hartman’s arms tucked around me, the blanket in Hartman’s arms…It all looks a lot more scandalous than it is.
“Who are you?” the cop asks.
“Hartman Smith.”
The cop rubs his forehead. “One of the girls mentioned your name before the ambulance left.”
I fall against Hartman. “Ambulance?”
“Floor collapsed. Everyone’s on their way to the hospital. I’ll call in that we found you. There wasn’t much rubble, but we thought maybe we’d missed you in there.”
Prickling cold passes from my forehead into that place that makes people faint from shock. I grasp Hartman’s arm as my legs go weak.
“What?” My quivering voice doesn’t sound like me. “Who was hurt?”
“All I know is that everyone’s been taken in.” He talks into his radio to say that he’s found Hartman and me walking near the site and that I appear to be fine.
