"So, Kyle tells me you're coming for dinner on Sunday," Judy said as if it were a confirmation of something already discussed.
"I beg your pardon?" Bewildered, Lauren looked, first at Judy, then at Kyle.
Kyle blew out a breath and gave her a crooked grin. "Ma, would you let me get around to asking her first?"
"What are you wasting time for? Just ask the girl for cripes sake," Judy chortled.
"Well, I, uh-" Lauren stammered.
"Are we going somewhere, Mommy?" Kristen asked curiously, looking up at Lauren with widened eyes.
"Here, have a cup of hot chocolate to warm you." Judy extended a Styrofoam cup filled with hot chocolate and piece of fried dough lightly dusted with powdered sugar. Lauren automatically accepted, keeping the hot chocolate for herself and handing the pastry to Kristen.
Kyle quickly whisked her away from the concession stand. "Sorry about that."
"It's okay. She's just..." Lauren turned to look back at the concession stand, still reeling from the strange conversation.
"What is it?" he asked, answering her befuddled expression.
"I'm sorry. It was rude of me to stare. It's just that your mother..."
"I know. She spoke a little soon. But the invitation still stands. I mentioned to her this afternoon that I wanted to invite you and Kristen to dinner on Sunday. I hope you'll be able to make it," he said, squeezing Lauren's hand.
"No."
He stopped walking and jerked his body around to look at her. "You won't come for dinner?"
"No, that's not what I mean. It's just..." She didn't quite know how to verbalize her thoughts, especially since it was a cause of concern over being so young herself when Kristen was born. "Your mother seems so young." Heat filled her cheeks. It was a stupid thing to say, but honest none-the-less.
Kyle laughed. "She'd probably kiss you if she heard you say that."
"She seems too young to have a son your age is what I'm trying to say," she added.
"Most people pick up the fact that I tower over my parents or that they both have brown eyes and mine are blue."
Feeling embarrassed for such an inconsequential observation, Lauren crouched down to fiddle with Kristen's mittens that were now covered with powdered sugar from the fried dough.
As if sensing her discomfiture, he offered, "Mom and Dad knew early on they weren't going to have kids of their own. They adopted me."
"It's none of my business," Lauren blurted out, trying to brush off a flood of seven-year-old memories the word adoption evoked.
"It's okay. It doesn't bother me. It shouldn't bother you," Kyle returned as they made their way to the long line of people still waiting for Santa Claus to show.
"It doesn't," she stopped and turned to face him, trying her best to appear unfazed. The last thing she wanted was for him to misread her hang-ups over adoption as being a negative reflection on him. The truth was, Lauren had never quite given up the guilt over almost giving Kristen up for adoption all those years ago.
"Really? Why do I get the feeling there is something more?" It was frightening, the way Kyle's eyes seared through her as if he was penetrating her soul, reading her deepest fear. No one had ever come close to doing that before.
She darted a quick glance at Kristen, then back to Kyle. A prickly heat scorched beneath her scarf and began to feel like a noose around her neck. His eyes softened and his expression fell as they took their place in the long line.
He opened his mouth to speak, but his voice was drowned out by the roar of the crowd as Santa Claus arrived on the back of a bright red fire engine. The truck drove around the common with lights flashing as Christmas carols blared on the loud speaker and scattered people lost in the crowd sang along to Santa Claus is Coming to Town. Lauren breathed a heavy sigh of relief for the distraction. She hadn't spoken a word of her guilt to anyone since the day she left the hospital with Kristen all those years ago. She'd be damned if she started now.
# # #
Chapter Three
The flash of fear in Lauren's eyes startled Kyle. Her eyes were wide and luminous, like a deer shocked by the headlights of an oncoming car. It was many years ago, but he'd seen that same brand of fear before in Chas. Although a lot had changed since those rebel days, the memory of his friend's pain was etched in his brain forever.
And now he was seeing it again in Lauren. His first reaction was to reach out to her, hold her. Anything to erase that pain. But when he reached out to take her hand, she did something completely unexpected.
She laughed and shouted, "Come on!" Pulling both Kristen and Kyle deep into the crowd of people already joyfully caroling, she began singing at the top of her lungs. Kristen sang in between giggles and jumping up and down with glee.
A rush of excitement mixed with bewilderment consumed him. Was this the same woman who bluffed so miserably last night? Just when he thought he knew what to expect, she did a one hundred and eighty degree turn on him and raced in the other direction.
"You better watch out," she sang. "What's wrong? Join in," she urged.
They sang and laughed as Santa rode around the common before making his way through the crowd of people. With the music still blaring over the loud speakers, she shouted teasingly, "It's a good thing they don't discriminate for singing out of tune."
His eyebrows furrowed. "Why's that?"
"Because you would have been kicked out of the choir long ago. You can't carry a tune to save your life." When she laughed, her voice was rich and pure and her face was brighter than the midday sun.
His breath caught in his throat. "Hey, it's the enthusiasm behind the song that counts."
She nudged him. "If you say so."
As Santa Claus made his way through the cheering crowd, the town Christmas tree was set ablaze. A chorus of oh's and ah's filtered through the town square along with cheering.
Kyle gazed down at Lauren's face and was transfixed by the awe he saw there. Her mouth was agape and her eyes were as wide with wonder. Along with Kristen, she stared up at the Christmas tree as if she'd never seen anything like it before. In fact, both mother and daughter looked as if they had just walked into Santa's winter wonderland with the golden key.
God, she was beautiful. He wanted to touch her, but didn't want to break the spell that had come over her.
They waited in line to see Santa, toes and noses frozen in the dipping temperature, watching the mist from their breath, without any real conversation. Despite the laughter they'd shared earlier, Kyle knew that there was something Lauren was holding back. She'd acted weird, to say the least, when she met his mom and he mentioned that he was adopted. Suddenly, he needed to know the reason why. Given the right moment, he fully intended to get to the bottom of what made Lauren Alexander tick.
"Look, the line has died down for sleigh rides. Why don't we take advantage of our luck?" Kyle said, gently tugging Lauren by the hand. It felt so natural holding her hand that when he realized he was doing it, he just held on and savored the toasty feeling it gave him.
"I really should get Kristen home," Lauren said. "She's been out late two nights in a row."
"It's not a school night. Surely, she doesn't have to be in bed so early," he challenged, hoping he could gain a little advantage by soliciting Kristen's help. He wasn't disappointed.
"Yeah, let's go see the horses!" Kristen squealed, scrunching her shoulders up to keep herself warm.
She shot a you're-playing-dirty glance at Kyle and turned to Kristen. "But honey, you look so cold. I think we need-"
"We'll keep her warm. We can sit her between us," Kyle interjected before Lauren could make another protest. Moving closer he drew in the scent of her, fresh and clean, uniquely feminine and he added in a whisper, "Will that be a safe enough distance for you, Ms. Alexander?"
She sucked in a breath and peered straight into his eyes. He hadn't expected her to let go of his remark without a comeback. He figured she'd shoot back with that same wildcat fire he'd seen last night in the
parking lot. What downright shocked him was seeing the fire hidden in the depths of her wide eyes that spoke of desire. And maybe a hint of fear. She said nothing and that surprised him most of all. But then again, he was finding out fast that Lauren Alexander was full of surprises.
* * *
"Thanks, Dad," Kyle said as the horse-drawn carriage came to a halt in front of one of the town's oldest Victorian homes, located just on the outskirts of the common. For the past three holiday seasons, his father had used two of the work horses from the farm to give sleigh rides on the back trails of the farm. But for use in the town square where the pavement was clear of snow, he needed the carriage to give "sleigh" rides.
"Anytime. We can take another ride after dinner on Sunday if you like," Will Preston said to Lauren as he helped her down from the sleigh. Kristen was still in her arms and well on her way to falling asleep. "We can take a real sleigh ride then. Maybe this little lady will stay awake to enjoy the ride next time." He smiled and rumpled the little girl's hair causing her to stir in her Lauren's arms just enough to let out a lazy yawn.
"Well, I'm not sure that we can-"
"We better get Kristen inside," Kyle interrupted.
"Yes. It was nice meeting you, Mr. Preston."
"Likewise. Be seeing you on Sunday I'm sure," Will called out as he climbed back on to the carriage.
Kyle waved as his father rode away. "See you."
He grasped the cold brass knob and yanked the door with more force than a girl as tiny as Kristen could ever muster. "I'll be by tomorrow to oil this door jamb. You're going to dislocate your shoulder if you keep this up."
"On the up side, I don't have to go to the gym. Thanks, but there's no need. Mrs. Hopkins' son usually comes by to do repairs when needed," Lauren said, dismissing his offer. Her hair shimmered in the moonlight giving her an angelic look that caught Kyle off guard. His eyes focused on the fullness of her glossy lips as he fought the urge to bend his head and steal a kiss. If it wasn't for Kristen being in her mother's arms, he probably would've done just that.
He wondered just what kind of man tosses aside a woman as beautiful as Lauren Alexander without any thought of the child they created. How that same man could live without the laughter just waiting to bubble up from the depths of her soul to fill his own. She was full of life just waiting to burst free. He'd seen just how much tonight when she pulled him into the crowd of Christmas carolers and sang to her heart's content.
"Let me take her," he offered, watching Lauren step awkwardly with a sleepy Kristen in her arms.
"No, thanks. I have her."
"It's a long way to the third floor."
"She's my daughter. I do it all the time." Lauren moved past him, her jaw squared and determined like she'd been last night, her boots scuffing against the worn wooden treads as she advanced up the stairs. He wondered if they'd ever get past this barrier. Tonight, he had hoped she'd lower her shield enough to let him get a real glimpse of her.
They climbed the three flights of stairs until they reached the landing that headed to her attic apartment.
"Thank you once again, Kyle." She shifted Kristen in her arms and rattled her keys in her hand, but made no move to unlock the door. It was clear to him that she was debating whether or not to invite him in.
Without a word, he took the keys from her hand. "This one?" He lifted one of the keys for her to view.
She nodded. "There's a light switch on the left side as you open the door."
The door swung open and Kyle grazed his left hand against the smooth wall until he found the switch that illuminated the living room. He stepped in and Lauren breezed straight by him into a back room.
"I'll be out in a minute," she said in a voice just loud enough for Kyle to hear.
He pulled the key from the lock and closed the door behind him, jingling the keys in his hand as he scanned her home. It was a cozy attic apartment with slanted walls in the gable ends and old style woodwork that spoke of the craftsmanship of the building's earlier years. He brushed his hand over the stained wood grain in admiration. You didn't see moldings and cabinetry made with such detail in new construction. He'd have to remember the detail work when he added the finishing touches to his house.
As he walked into the open living room, his boot kicked something pliant, spilling its contents. He stooped to see the damage and found a wicker basket filled with magazines, some of which had scattered on the floor by the slipcovered sofa. He quickly refilled the basket with what would fit and placed the rest on the end table. He lingered a moment to read the cover of one of the magazines before placing it down next to a course catalog from a local community college.
The furniture, although worn from years of use, felt homey and invited you to sit down and get comfortable. Kyle guessed that everything was either a hand-me-down or bought at the Salvation Army store with limited funds. A picture frame perched on the television caught his attention. He picked up the wooden frame, a double oval containing a portrait of Lauren with a man and woman he guessed were her parents on one side, a candid shot of Kristen at the park in the other.
"She was asleep before I took her coat off. Didn't even stir." Lauren bounced into the room as if there had never been a moment of tension between them. Kyle leaned against a built-in bookcase and realized this was the first time he'd seen her without her bulky coat on. "Nice, isn't it?" she said.
"Hmmm. Oh, the woodwork? Yes, it's beautiful."
"It's one of the things I love about this apartment. Want some coffee? I have decaf."
"Yeah, sure."
She stretched to reach some mugs in a cabinet over the sink and he noticed that her long legs, accentuated by her form fitting jeans, were like that of a dancer's. They almost seemed too long for her torso. The coral turtleneck she wore tucked neatly into the waistband set off the color of her eyes and put a rosy glow on her creamy complexion.
She busied herself in the tiny, but functional kitchenette, seemingly unaware of Kyle's study of her. He had to admit he liked just gazing at her, the way she shuffled her socked feet on the floor, the way she unwittingly pushed her hair behind her ear to reveal the soft flesh of her earlobe.
"I hope you don't mind instant. As you can see, counter space is nearly non-existent so there is no room for a coffee maker. Why don't you sit on the sofa and take off your coat? It's almost done. Oh, and how do you take your coffee?" she asked. Lauren knew she was babbling, but she couldn't help it. She always tripped over her own tongue when she was nervous. It was the first time she'd had a man who wasn't there to make repairs in her apartment. The first of many first's, she guessed.
"Black, please."
With a trembling hand, she poured the boiling water into the two mugs, sloshing liquid over the brim of the second. She wiped up the spill with a dish towel and topped off her mug with milk before joining Kyle on the sofa.
This is so ridiculous. She was a grown woman acting like a school girl with her first crush. All she needed was pompoms and a pony tail to complete the picture.
"Your family seems so nice," she commented. Anything to keep him from staring at her like he was about to swallow her whole. She wasn't sure if the thought frightened or excited her.
He smiled in response and his eyes lit up with such affection it made her heart ache.
"I noticed the pictures on the television." Kyle pointed to the picture frame.
"Krissy loves the jungle gym. She was just four years old then." Lauren clenched the hot mug in her hand and felt her sweaty palms burn against the ceramic.
"The couple with you, are they your parents?" he asked as he got up and retrieved the frame.
"Yes."
He sat down on the sofa next to her and smiled warmly as he stared at the faces behind the glass. "They must spoil Kristen rotten. Most grandparents do."
She dropped her mug on the table with more force than was necessary and regretted her gut reaction immediately. "She doesn't know them."
His expression fell an
d his eyebrows furrowed. "You don't see them?"
"No." She wasn't about to tell him it wasn't by her choice, but theirs. She couldn't stand the thought of his pity, nor did she welcome it.
"For God's sakes, why not?" He genuinely looked aghast. His clear blue eyes were darker in color, and his mouth agape.
"Not everyone has a close-knit family," she said softly, taking the frame from his hand and returning it to its rightful place.
She could feel his eyes probed her, seeking the answer to his questions. It made her insides churn.
"What could they have possibly done to make you leave?"
She straightened her spine and swung around to face him. "It was a mutual thing, Kyle. I'd prefer not to dredge up the past. Can we talk about something else, please?"
All I Want for Christmas is You Page 4
