by Colbie Kay
I won't be writing to you anymore, I hope you're happy, and I'll love you forever, Daph.
Devon
My God, how much is one person supposed to deal with? Everything makes sense now, but Devon needs to deal with his demons. He needs to realize this shit wasn't his fault, and there was no way he could have prevented it from happening. I know that just by reading what he wrote, but I guess living it could make you feel otherwise. I’m thankful he’s getting the help he needs.
I grab the letter about his father, get my keys from the kitchen counter, and I lock up my apartment. When I turn to start walking, I bump into someone. When I look up, an instant feeling of irritation takes hold. "What the hell are you doing here?"
"Hey, come on, babe. I just wanna talk. I thought we could hang out." Brad tries giving me a sexy smile, but fails miserably. It looks more like he's got an Elvis lip going on. What the hell did I ever see in this jackass?
"Not now, Brad!" I push by him racing to my car. I don't even bother explaining that he wasn't welcome at my apartment when we were dating, why would he be now?
When I reached my destination, I slam my car door and storm up to Devon's parent's front door, pounding my fist on the wood. Connie answers. "Hi, Daphne." She smiles, but I'm not.
"Where's your husband, Connie?" I ask harshly.
Her brows knit and lips purse. "He's sitting at the dining table. Why? What's going on?"
I push my way past her, taking quick steps to their dining room, slamming the letter down on the table. He looks up at me with a raised brow. My eyes bore into his. "Did you say this shit to him? Did you say these horrible things to Devon? Are you the reason he left?"
Devon’s dad stands to his full height, the top of my head coming to his chin, but this intimidation tactic isn't going to scare me. We stand toe-to-toe, he stares down at me while I stare up at him.
"Daphne, what are you talking about?" Connie asks again, but I ignore her.
I continue staring at the man who fucked up his son's life. "Did you do it?" I ask more sternly.
He shrugs his shoulder. "Doesn't matter if I did or not, he's just as weak now as he was then. The Army couldn’t even make that boy a man. He’ll always be a scared little mama’s bitch boy." I guess I was wrong. He doesn’t feel guilty or sorry for the way he treated Devon. “He was a failure from the start. He should have pulled that trigger a long time ago, but he couldn’t even succeed at that.”
My eyes narrow as my hands form into fists at my sides. I grit through my teeth, "You have no idea what he's been through." It’s taking all of my strength not to throat punch him.
He spits, “He’s back and you become that stupid girl once again.” He shakes his head. “All this time I’ve tried to make Zane better and you just go a destroy it by letting that no-good son of a bitch in his life.”
Stepping closer, I lift my hand and slap him across his smug face. “Don’t you dare bring my son into this! The worst fucking thing I ever did was let you be in his life.” I hiss, “You are a disgusting human being.”
"Someone tell me what is going on right now!" Connie demands.
I hold the letter out for her to take. "Read what your husband did." I keep my eyes glued to his.
It only takes a minute until the gasp can be heard. "John, tell me this isn't true." Her voice is unsteady. He doesn't acknowledge her, he doesn't deny or admit, he continues staring daggers at me.
"Get out!" Connie punches him in the arm, jostling his stance. "How could you? He is our son! How could you say such things? Get out now!" She screams while continuing to slap and hit him. He doesn't say a word as she follows him to the front door, opens it for him, and when he walks out, she slams the door shut and locks it.
Her tear-filled eyes find mine. "He's the reason Devon never came home." She doesn't say it as a question but more of realization. She walks over to their couch and plops down. I sit next to her. "John wasn't always the nicest man, especially when he was drinking. He would say things to Devon, but never anything like that. I would yell at him and tell him not to say stuff like that, but he would tell me not to interfere with how he raised our son. He said he was teaching him to be a man." She huffs out a breath.
My eyes shift in her direction. “Why does he hate his son so much?”
Her head shakes back and forth. “I don’t know. It wasn’t always like that, but Devon was always closer to me and they never really had that father-son bond.”
I look down, fidgeting with my fingers. "I'm sorry."
"No." She pats my thigh. "I'm the one that's sorry. I should have opened my eyes and stood up for my son.” She repeats more to herself that to me, “I'm the one that's sorry."
My eyes drift to hers. "None of us knew how bad it was."
She nods. "John was a different person outside of this house, but behind closed doors..." She trails off.
We sit quietly for a while longer until it's time for me to pick up Zane from my parents’ house next door.
"You're really starting to open up, Devon. That's a good thing," Ian praises me in our daily therapy session.
I shrug my shoulder. "It's not hard to open up about my father. He's a piece of shit who puts on a display for people, pretending he's the greatest fucking father. Like he should be the founder of “#1 Dad” on those shirts and shit." I contain the fury that wants to be set free. As much as I hate my father, I have to talk about the sorry excuse of a man that he is.
Ian turns his chair toward me. "You’re holding a lot of resentment for him."
"I do," I deadpan.
His brows furrow. "Why not for your mom?"
"I don't know." I shrug. "I guess because she tried what she could, but what could she really do when she was out with her friends?"
"Do you blame her?"
I think about that question. "Maybe a little. I think I'm angrier that she didn't leave him. My mom's not weak, but she always was when it came to my dad. Both of us always hid what it was really like at home."
"Does she know why you never came home? Why she hadn't seen you in eleven years?"
"No." I shake my head. "I never told her. I just stayed away. Thought it'd be better that way, but now after she came to visit me, I'm not sure that was the best thing to do. Life is short, Ian. I know that all too well from trying to take my own to being in the Army and in the MC life. I could have been gone in an instant, and after seeing her, I realize the years have taken their toll on her."
He nods in understanding. "I think it would be good for you to talk to her."
"Yeah. Maybe we can try mending what’s been broken." I look up at the clock. "My hours up and Daphne will be here any minute." It's been a month since her last visit and I'm anxious to see her.
"Okay." He laughs. "Just remember what I told you. You have made amazing progress over the last two months, but you have a long road ahead of you, and this last month is going to be the hardest."
"I remember." I stand from my chair, walk to the door, and leave his office.
It took longer than I thought for Daphne to arrive, but her plane was delayed and that cut into the time we get to see each other.
The sun is beginning to set while we sit by the pond. Daphne is resting between my legs, her head leaned back against my chest as her finger traces along the lines on the palm of my hand.
"I read your letters," She tells me absently.
"Yeah," I say quietly and kiss her temple.
"I understand now, but I have something to tell you." She tries to turn to look at me, but I hold her in place. "I let your mom read the letter about what your dad did to you."
I suck in a breath and my eyes widen. "What happened?"
"Your mom kicked him out."
"Fucking finally." I release my relieved breath.
"Are you mad I showed her?"
"No, I'm not mad. I wish I would have gone to her sooner."
"I was so pissed, I couldn't stop myself. Knowing he treated you that way, and that I've let Zane ar
ound him all this time…" She shakes her head against my chest.
I kiss her temple one more time, smelling her floral scent. My cock begins to jerk behind my zipper. Fuck! I don’t know how much longer I can last not being inside of her. "As long as he was good with our son, that's all that matters." I try to keep my thoughts on the topic at hand.
She nods. " He was. That's what I don't get. It was like he was making up for what he did to you through Zane."
"Guilt."
She nods. "Yeah, seems so."
"Hey, I don't wanna talk about that shit anymore." I move her dark hair off her shoulder and kiss the crook of her neck.
"Devon." She says my name on a whisper.
I continue kissing up and down the soft flesh of her neck. My tongue peeks out and runs the same line as my kisses.
"Devon." My name falls from her lips in a hushed gasp.
My fingertips trail from her knee, up her inner thigh, and I thank fuck she's wearing that cute as hell checkered skirt. I run my fingers over the silk of her panties, feeling her wetness coating the material.
"Devon," She says with a little more strength and tries to sit up, but I hold her in place with my free arm around her chest. "We can't do this here. Someone could see us."
"It's dark. No one's going to come out here, and if they do, I'll hear them," I whisper against her ear.
Her body is still tense, but she opens her thighs wider for me. I smile against her neck while I push my fingers inside her panties. Slowly I drag one up her pussy to her clit and the first touch has her jerking against me. Moving my finger in small circles, I drag it back down and push inside of her, feeling her wet heat. I pull almost all the way out before pushing back in. Her hands grip my thighs, her nails digging in as she grows more turned on.
Small moans slip from her mouth and her breaths become short and labored. I pull my digit out coated in her wetness, I go back to her clit and move in small, slow circles once again.
Applying more pressure, I pick up speed. The faster my finger moves against her clit, the faster her breaths come. Her chest heaves, my hard cock drips with precum, and her body begins to shake under my touch. I move my free hand under her shirt, push her bra up, freeing her ample tits so that I can lightly rub my thumb over her nipple. It hardens even more so from my touch. I roll it between my thumb and finger slightly pulling it. "That's it, Daph. Come for me. Come all over my fingers so I can taste how fucking sweet you are."
"Dev!" She cries out quietly.
"Yeah, baby, let it go." I move faster, she shakes harder, her pants quicken, and her nails dig deeper. "You’re gonna come so fucking hard for me." I egg her on, bringing her closer. Her thighs fall open the rest of the way and her hips lift, searching for her impending orgasm.
I press more firmly against her tight little clit, quickly moving my finger around and around until she screams out in pleasure. I quickly cover her mouth with my hand to muffle her loud moans. I slow my movements down, letting her continue to ride the wave of her orgasm. Once she's done, I bring my fingers to my mouth and close my eyes as I taste and savor her sweetness.
Pulling my fingers out of my mouth, I cup her cheeks with my hands, bringing her face closer to mine. I smash our lips together and push my tongue inside of her mouth, letting her taste herself.
Our tongues tangle in a mess of lust, want, and need. I grip the back of her hair tightly, and she does the same to me.
"Devon?" Ian yells a few feet away from us.
I pull back, breaking our connection to acknowledge him. "I'm saying goodbye."
"I guess visiting hours are over," Daphne pouts. It makes me laugh, but fuck I want more time with her.
I reply, "Yeah, I guess so."
"So, I'll see you next month when you come home?" She looks up at me through her hooded eyes and thick black lashes.
"I'm gonna fucking miss you," I tell her, feeling the heaviness sitting on my chest.
"I'm gonna miss you too." Her voice is weak with sadness. She stands first and I follow.
Her arms wrap around my neck, mine wrap around her waist, and I pull her into me as close as I can get her. "I was hoping I could return the favor." She smiles against my shoulder.
I growl, my cock is still rock hard. "One more fucking month and you're fucking mine, woman."
"You gonna take me real good, Devon?" She asks against my ear, taunting and teasingly.
I push against her shoulders, staring at her sternly. "That's not helping my rock-hard cock." She smirks and I give her a good smack on the ass. "Get outta here." We both laugh.
I pull her into me one more time, giving her a slow tantalizing kiss. "I love you, Daph."
"I love you too, Dev."
I take her hand in mine, walk her to the rental car she drove here in, and watch her drive away until I can no longer see the tail lights.
It's been a long three months, but Devon is coming home today. Finally. His mom, my parents, Zane, and I are all waiting at the airport for his plane to land.
I spot Devon before anyone else. He looks gorgeous, with a determination I haven’t seen in him since high school, and his muscles are popping out of his tight black t-shirt under his cut. His hair has grown since he first left for Arizona. I wasn’t sure he would keep it that way, but it looks good, and the beard that has started growing makes him look so sexy.
I take off running toward him, leaving everyone else behind, and throw my arms around his neck. He grabs me around the waist and spins me. When I'm steady on my feet, he runs his hands through my hair, grabbing fistfuls, and smashes his lips against mine. I open for him, our tongues sliding together in a heated, breathtaking moment. My core tightens, and an ache forms that only he can make go away.
Soon, Daphne, soon. I tell myself repeatedly.
Hand in hand we walk back to our families. Everyone takes their turn hugging him, and he leaves Zane for last. "Hey, Zane." Devon pulls him into his tight hold.
"Hey, Dad." Zane hugs him back just as tight with the biggest smile I've ever seen from our son.
"You ready to hang out?" Devon asks with a matching grin.
Zane pulls back and the smile falls. "I have to go to Grandma and Grandpa's tonight."
Devon looks over at me with a raised brow. I bite the bottom of my lip and it clicks. "It's okay, Zane. I'm never leaving again, so we can hang out every day starting tomorrow."
Zane looks up at him. "You promise?"
Devon nods. "I promise. Let's go get my bag, and then let’s get outta here." Devon reaches over, taking my hand in his and lacing our fingers together. We wait at the baggage carousel and after getting his luggage I do a search on my phone to find a good restaurant.
While we wait for our food at the steakhouse, Devon's mom, Connie, asks, "Do you want to stay with me until you get settled in?"
Devon's hand on my thigh tightens. "Thanks, Mom, but I have a place to stay." I know he means the clubhouse, but I'm hoping he will eventually want to come live with me and Zane.
She takes a drink of her water. "I understand, but I want you to know that it is your home and you're welcome anytime."
"I appreciate the gesture." The corner of his mouth tilts up. I’m hoping now that his dad is out of the picture, they can start mending what that ass broke.
Zane asked a lot of questions about why his Grandpa Mayfield wasn't around anymore, and we tried to explain it to him without telling him the details of what he did to Devon. Zane was upset at first, which is understandable, but as time goes on, it’s getting easier.
My dad pipes in with his own question, "What are you going to do for work? Were you working before you left?" My dad has been eyeing his cut, so I know the grilling is about to begin.
“Dad,” I give in a warning tone.
Devon’s hand on my thigh tightens with his own warning. He’s letting me know he’s got this. "I didn't have a regular nine to five job before, no, but my club compensates me very well."
"You're club?" My dad cocks his
brow. I refrain from rolling my eyes into the back of my head. My father is not stupid and knows damn well what club just by the cut.
Devon doesn’t hesitate with his response, "I'm a patched member of Satan's Sinners MC."
My father's face reddens. "Daphne!" His voice rises.
"Dad," I grumble. “You knew he was a member when you saw his cut,” I huff and shake my head.
"No daughter or grandson of mine will be—" Devon holds his hand up, cutting my father off.
"With all due respect, sir. My club brothers have been there for me the last eleven years. They are as much my family as my own mother. When I had nowhere else to go, they took me in. I won't sit here and let you disrespect them, or me, for what you think we’re about when you have no real understanding of what it means to be a part of the MC life. You think we are nothing but criminals and outlaws. While that might be true, we are also protecting the city you live in. We protect our own. We’re a brotherhood, and every one of them would risk their life for me. I would do the same for them. I'm here now to take care of Daphne, be the man she deserves, and to be a father to my son. My son. You will not tell me how to raise him." Holy shit! I'm taken back by Devon's words, not in a bad way, but in a sexy, turned on kind of way. The way he stood up for himself, his club, me, and Zane…I don’t know what the hell his dad was talking about because in my eyes, he’s nothing but a truly honorable, loyal man. And those are some sexy ass traits to have.
At the perfect moment, the waitress brings our food and the rest of dinner is quiet.
When we leave the restaurant, Zane rides back with my parents, giving Devon and me extra time alone to talk. He pushes the gas pedal on the highway, racing to get home quickly. It's a two-and-a-half-hour drive back to Wichita from Tulsa.
Both of us are quiet for a moment until he speaks. "I'm not going to apologize for what I said to your dad." His eyes stay on the road, but he glances at me out of the corner of his eye.
