“So, how was your flight?” I ask, trying to bring the personal factor down a bit.
“Oh, it was fine, thanks. I appreciate you coming to get me. I know you probably had other things to do.”
“I’m sure, Linney, you know I don’t mind. Let’s just get your bags and get out of here, it’s insane.”
“I know right? What is with this music?” she giggles, I’ve missed that sound. Real, genuine laughter.
*******************
“So, this is your room?” Caroline says as she sits in the desk chair. I think of Quinn spinning in the chair. I’ve got to stop doing that.
“You still playing a lot?” She asks, motioning to my bass that is leaning against the wall.
“Eh, not so much anymore. Just by myself.”
“Oh. You haven’t met anyone?” She catches herself, “To play music with, I mean.”
“Uh, no, not really.”
“How about your pictures? Are you still taking them?”
I freeze. “Wait, you know about that?”
She nods, her fair cheeks tinged pink. “Of course.”
“Why didn’t you ever say anything?”
“Benny, if you wanted to tell me, you would have.” She smiles shyly.
“It’s not like that, Linney.”
She nods.
“So, listen, I’m going to go and put your bags in the guest room, do you need anything?”
Caroline stands up and puts her hand on my arm. The excitement I used to feel at her soft touch is not totally gone. Everything about Caroline is sweet and familiar. Without thinking, I lean down and kiss her softly; my mouth barely grazes hers before I pull away, leaving her lips slightly parted and looking confused. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.
“No, Ben, I don’t need anything else right now.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Quinn
I’ve been going to school all week long, but I haven’t been to work. My dad and I got into it yesterday. He confronted me about not showing up at the office. He didn’t ask me why I hadn’t been there, most certainly because he believes that I have no actual reason other than just being an all around screw up. Whatever. He did however “ground” me. I’m eighteen years old, but because I live in his house, he can punish me “whenever he god damned feels like it.” It’s not like I have anywhere to go anyway, or that I would feel like going out even if I did.
“So, what do you think?” Tessa asks me.
“I’m sorry, what?” I haven’t heard a word she’s said.
Tessa gives me an annoyed scowl. “I asked if you were going to come to the party at Grant’s house tonight.”
“Grant? As in Sydney’s Grant? He doesn’t exactly seem like the party type.” Its true, I didn’t think he and Syd did anything other than watch movies and make googly eyes at each other.
“I know, right.” Tess stands up and buttons her cardigan. “You know his parents are like, never around, right? And I think I remember Syd saying that his older brother just moved back in, I kind of get the vibe he’s the one throwing it, but whatever. I’m going to go, you should come! Me, you and Syd never hang out anymore.” I honestly can’t think of anything I’d rather do less than hang out with them right now, and Tessa is getting on my damn nerves.
“And if you can’t make it tonight, you can always come to church with me on Sunday!” I was wrong– there is something I’d rather do less. Much less.
“I can’t go anywhere, Tess. I’m grounded.” Normally I wouldn’t own up to this. I’d claim to have some super important family function to attend, but I’m worn out. I’ve been keeping up this pretense for years, and after my confession to Sydney last week, I’m pretty sure there is no point anymore.
“Grounded? What for?” She asks as we walk to the parking lot.
“I quit my job. Sydney didn’t tell you any of this?”
Tessa shakes her head. One thing that Sydney is not is a gossip, God love her.
“It doesn’t matter, I just can’t go. You guys have fun though,” I say as I get into my car. I don’t wait around for her to press the issue any more. It is nearing the temperature of the sun inside, but I waste no time closing the door. The steamy interior is much more comfortable than having a personal conversation. I consider not starting the car, suffering in the near triple digit temps for as long as I can. Just because. Because I deserve to.
But I don’t. Instead, I go home for another weekend of family fun. Happy Friday!
*******************
We’ve had dinner, played baseball, watched the History Channel together, and had about all the fake family bonding I can stomach. Dad and Mason have already gone to bed; they have to get up early for a baseball tournament. My mom and I have been sitting in the same room in complete silence for well over an hour. She is engrossed in some old show with Don Johnson and an obnoxious yellow car, while I flip through a recipe book. It’s after ten o’clock on a Friday night and I’m bored out of my ever loving mind. My life seriously blows. Since I have nothing better to do, I decide to go to bed early. I get up from the couch and stumble toward the stairs.
“Quinn, hon, you wouldn’t run to the store for me would you?” My mom asks as I reach the first step.
I grimace in the darkness.
“Why, what do you need?”
“I’m dying for some ice cream. I think your dad must’ve finished off the rest of the Rocky Road. You can get yourself something too, if you want.” She must have taken the happy pills today.
I exhale loudly enough for a normal person to realize that I am annoyed, but her drug induced haze prevents all common deduction. “Fine, I’ll be right back.”
I grab my keys and head to Kroger. Woo-hoo!
The store is completely deserted, thank God. I look like total ass. Not that I have cared too much about my looks lately, but it is Friday night. I’m standing in the frozen section digging through a pile of disorganized Ben & Jerry’s, when I hear an all too familiar voice behind me.
“Well, well, well, I was wondering what you were up to tonight, and now I know.” Daniel (“excuse me while I find my antiseptic spray”) is standing behind me, holding a case of beer and wearing a super classy tank top that reads, “SUNS OUT, GUNS OUT.”
“You were wondering about me? Doubtful. And as a side note, how exactly do you plan on getting that big-boy beverage out of here?” I ask.
I locate the one remaining Phish Food, covered in thick ice crystals and push past him.
“No, really. When I saw your little boyfriend at Grant’s party without you, I wondered where your gorgeous self was. Oh, and don’t you worry about me, I’ve got the best fake ID around. I can get you one sometime if you want. Grant’s being a douche about letting booze into the house, so I’m going to sneak this baby back inside,” he says, patting the case of Shiner Boch lovingly.
“Ben.was.there?” I gulp each word, trying not to choke.
“Yeah, with some snooty looking chick. I guess that’s why you’re here– dressed like that.” He motions up and down to my requisite wrinkled t-shirt and gym shorts. “And buying ice cream on a Friday night. Sucks. You should have called me though, we always did have a good time.” His smirk says that he’s thoroughly enjoying my horror.
“Ben was there with someone? Who?”
“I don’t know, I’ve never seen her before. Cute I guess if you’re into the whole stick-up-your-ass type. Me, not so much. Are you okay? You don’t look so hot. I mean, you do, you always do…”
“Whatever Daniel, just shut up for a second and let me think.” I shove the ice cream at him and press my hands to the sides of my head. I can hear the blood pounding in between my ears.
He stands there impatiently, questioning my sanity I presume.
“Listen Daniel, I need you to do me a favor,” I say. I start toward the front of the store; I need to get out of here.
“Anything baby, what do you need from me?” He sounds hopeful, and horny. Blech.
“Sure thing, darlin’,” he says.
“Oh, and Daniel?”
“Yeah?”
“I need this too.” I hand him a fifth of tequila.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Ben
“Hey Ben,” Sydney says.
She smiles politely at Caroline, while Tessa gives Linney the once over.
“Hi Syd. Linney, this is Sydney and Tessa.” I introduce them out of obligation, but I’m peering over both of their heads searching the crowds of people for Quinn.
“Do you go to our school?” Tessa asks Caroline.
Caroline shakes her head. I can tell she’s uncomfortable. “Caroline’s a friend from Kentucky.” I tell them. The fact that Linney purses her lips tightly when I use the word, “friend”, doesn’t go unnoticed by me. Before I kissed her, everything was one-hundred percent simple with Linney. Now, not so much.
“Oh, I see,” Tessa says curiously. She stares at me long enough to realize what I’m doing. “If you’re looking for Quinn, she isn’t here, she’s grounded or something.”
I’m not sure if I’m thankful there won’t be any drama, or let down that I didn’t at least get to see her– even if she wasn’t going to talk to me.
“Oh, that’s right,” I say.
“I guess you knew that already though, right? Everyone knows everything going on but me,” she mumbles to herself.
“Give it a rest, Tess. Quinn’s just having a tough time,” Sydney says.
“Everyone is entitled to have a bad day, Syd, but frankly, I could do without the daily dose of Quinnitude,” Tessa says, tossing her hair over her shoulder dramatically.
Caroline glances up at me with a searching expression that translates to, can we go, yet? It was her idea to come in the first place. She wanted to get out and meet people, and I didn’t disagree. Really, the last thing I wanted to do was sit around the house with Caroline and my mom talking about the past, or worse, Caroline reading more into the kiss than I intended. I can tell that meeting people like Tessa was not exactly what she had in mind, though.
“Did I hear my name?” Quinn appears out of no where. Ah, hell. She meets my eyes for the quickest of seconds, her eyes severe as daggers.
“Hey bitch, I thought you said you were grounded?” Tessa says to her.
Quinn doesn’t even bother to glance at Tessa
“Hey bitch, I thought you said you were my friend,” Quinn says.
“Quinn, that’s not-” Sydney starts. But then decides better of getting in the middle of her two friends and clamps her mouth shut.
I see Daniel, the tool Quinn used to date walking toward us.
“There you are,” he says. He wraps his arm around Quinn’s waist, and my hand involuntarily forms a tight fist. I squelch the voice telling me to punch first, ask questions later.
Tessa laughs. “Oh my, isn’t this cozy?”
Quinn shoots her a warning glare and shakes Daniel’s arm off of her with a look of what I interpret as disgust. My hand slowly relaxes, and I fight the twitch of a smile that is forming. Not to say that the situation still isn’t incredibly awkward, but I’m glad to see a little emotion from Quinn again.
“So, have you met Caroline?” Tessa continues. Oh for the love of all that is holy, shut up Tessa.
Linney tenses up. She has no clue what is going on, but I know she can tell it isn’t good. She clutches my arm for security, her nails dig into my skin. This was a total crap plan. I never should have brought her here.
“Caroline?” Quinn says. Her surprised and yet amused eyes dart to Linney, taking her in. She’s standing on the other side of Caroline but even with the distance, I can smell the alcohol on her. All I can think is please don’t start something with her-that is one fight I don’t want to be in the middle of.
“Oh yeah, I guess I do recognize you from the pictures he keeps of you.”
Caroline flinches. “Hi,” she says meekly, and gives Quinn the tiniest of waves.
“Nice.” Quinn mouths to me. All I can do is shrug. She stares back at me fiercly.
“What do you want me to say, Quinn?” I ask her. I’m totally baffled. I don’t know what the hell it is that she wants from me.
“I could go wait outside while ya’ll talk,” Caroline says.
I open my mouth to tell Caroline not to leave, but Quinn cuts me off. “Yeah, that’d be great,” she says.
“Oh come on, Quinn, don’t be such a bitch,” Tessa says.
“Yeah, definitely wasn’t talking to you, thanks though.” Quinn shoots back.
Shit, this is not going to end well at all. I see Sydney meet Grant’s eyes from across the room. He breaks off the conversation he’s having and walks over to us. I’m immediately jealous of how in-sync he and Sydney are. Caroline drops my arm and starts to walk away.
“Linney, come back here, you don’t need to leave,” I say. But she just nods with a strained smile and keeps walking toward the door. I don’t blame her.
“Quinn lets dance,” Daniel says. He is apparently oblivious to what is going on between the rest of us. There is no doubt that he’s just as hammered as Quinn.
“There is no music, asstard. I left my bottle in your car, go find me something else to drink,” she says. She gives him a hearty shove away from her, and he walks off obediently.
“Well, it sure didn’t take you long, did it?” she says, slurring her words.
I lean in toward her, trying my best to keep what little privacy is possible between us.
“I don’t really think this is the place to talk about it.” I tell her through clenched teeth.
“I can’t believe you dumped me for that-that sleeping pill.” She throws her head back in an antagonistic laugh.
“That’s who he broke up with you for? Oh for fucks sake, when did I get so out of the loop?” Tessa says, shaking her head at Sydney.
Sydney mouths, “Not now,” and pulls Tessa away from Quinn and I, finally giving us a few feet of space to ourselves.
“Quinn, you know that’s not true. We can talk about this tomorrow,” I say. I’m trying to stay calm but her accusations are infuriating. She has to know that she totally crushed me, not only by cheating on me, but then breaking up with me.
Quinn closes the space between us and pushes on my chest. Her hair is styled with care, falling to her shoulders in soft waves. The outrageously form fitting, sparkly dress she’s wearing looks new. She looks insanely gorgeous, and perfectly put together, but her expression is completely out of control.
“Just stop,” I say. I put my hands up in surrender.
“Stop what? You wanted to talk before, so let’s talk.”
“Not now, Quinn,” I say.
“Yes, now! You show up with her and you don’t expect me to be pissed?”
“Quinn, calm down, this is insane.”
She shoves me in the shoulder. “I’m not insane,” she yells.
“I’m not saying that you are! I’m saying that this entire situation is just crazy. You have no right to show up and take it out on Caroline. You’ve obviously been drinking, so we can talk tomorrow.”
“Of course not! We’d never want to do anything to upset sweet Caroline! Or what is it that you call her? Linney? That’s just flippin’ precious! I never got a little pet name, shows where I ranked, huh?”
She takes a couple of steps back, loses her footing and falls to the hardwood floor. I reach out to help her up. I can’t stand to see her like this, it’s ripping me apart. She swats my hand away and gets up on her own.
“I was never good enough for you! I bet you wished you were with her the entire time we were together! Is that why you wouldn’t sleep with me? You were still hung up on her?”
I grind my teeth, my pulse pounding through my v
eins so violently that I feel lightheaded.
“Is that what this is about? Me not sleeping with you?” I’m going to lose it.
“So where is she sleeping at your house, Benny? That’s so cozy, the first time–”
“You want to get into it, Quinn? Fine, let’s talk about how I wouldn’t get you off, so you went and found someone that would!”
Quinn jerks her head back. She may be inebriated as hell, but she has never seen me angry and it shocks the shit out of her.
“I hope that made you feel better, you asshole,” she says.
“Feel better? Hardly. But I hope you enjoyed being a notch to that douchebag, because no matter what he told you, or promised you, that’s all you were. And I know you don’t see it, but you’re so much better than that.”
“I hate you,” she spits.
Her words sting, I’m not finished, though.
“Of course, that’s probably ideal for you. Being a piece of ass doesn’t require you to actually feel anything, does it?”
She straightens her dress, her lips forming an evil grimace. “I seriously hate you,” she says.
“Good, Quinn. Then hate me, just stay away from me.” I force myself to say. I’m so angry, but more than that, it’s what she wants, and it’s best for everyone, right?
She stumbles away from me slowly, but it only takes a second for Daniel to cling back to her side like cellophane.
“I’m ready to go home,” she tells him.
I start to open my mouth to protest, neither of them are in any shape to drive.
Grant beats me to it; he puts his hand up and mouths, “I’ve got it.” He looks at me with pity. Great.
“I’m gonna drive you two home.” I hear Grant tell them.
Even through my rage, I can’t turn off the need to try to take care of and protect her. There is nothing I want more in the world than to scoop Quinn up in my arms and take her home. But I can’t, because she isn’t mine anymore. She hates me.
Shit, I have to go and find Linney.
Grounding Quinn Page 11
