He avoided his friend’s gaze. “What do you mean?”
“Dog, you know what I mean,” Devin said. “You tried to get into it with every guy on the court. What’s bothering you?”
“Yeah, man,” Jared interjected. “I was going to leave it alone, but you haven’t been yourself all week. You’ve been on edge ever since you came back from that conference. What gives?”
Malcolm considered how much to tell. He hadn’t talked to anyone about what happened with Kenyatta in Florida or his break up with Jessica. The tension between him and Kenyatta had tormented him all week, and Friday’s episode in his office only made matters worse. He had lashed out at her because he’d been jealous, but when she accused him of intentionally humiliating her, he’d felt like the biggest ass on the planet. It had never been his intention to toy with her. He wanted her, and it had simply become impossible for him to ignore his feelings.
He didn’t understand it. He was usually able to control himself, but something about Kenyatta threw him completely. He genuinely liked her. Malcolm knew he could satisfy lust with any woman out there, but he didn’t want any woman anymore — he wanted her, and he couldn’t have her.
He needed to get it off his chest. He could trust Jared and Devin, knowing that nothing he said would go past the three of them. Jared might give him hell for pining after a woman, but he would get serious once he saw Malcolm was truly upset.
Malcolm looked at his brother and Devin. “I broke up with Jessica.”
“What?” they yelled simultaneously.
“Yeah, I told her we needed to cool it for a while.”
Jared frowned. “I thought things were good with you two? Bro, she was a freak. Why would you break up with her?”
“Kenyatta.”
“Kenyatta?” Jared asked. “The chick from your job? Aw, man, what happened?”
Devin laughed. “I know. You finally stopped fighting yourself and hit it.”
Malcolm shook his head. “Nah, nothing like that.” He remembered that night in Florida and corrected himself. “Well, almost nothing like that.”
He told them what happened in Florida. He left out the part about her overhearing the porn through his door; there was only so much information they needed.
“I couldn’t stay with Jessica after all that. I would have taken it out on her,” he explained.
Jared’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Okay, this doesn’t make any sense.”
“I know. Why would she try to play me like that?” Malcolm asked.
“No, I mean why would you stop?” Jared said with a laugh. “And since you did stop, why would you break up with Jessica? You didn’t technically cheat on her, so she would have never found out.”
“It’s not about that. I’m not feeling Jessica like that anymore.”
“So now you have no Jessica and your chance with Kenyatta is over. Bruh, you should have tapped that ass. At least you’d have had something to show for your trouble,” Jared said wearily as he shook his head.
“Whatever.”
Malcolm knew his brother wouldn’t understand. To Jared, women were a pleasant convenience and nothing more.
Devin put a hand on his chin and studied Malcolm. “You know, it almost seems as if you played yourself.”
It was Malcolm’s turn to look confused. “How did I play myself?”
“Number one, I know you’ve wanted her ever since she started working for you. And don’t bother denying it ’cause I’ve seen her, and honey is fine. Plus, you were all sad when she got engaged — ”
“Wait a minute,” Jared cut in, signaling time out with his hands. “You were crying when she got engaged? Damn, you got it bad.”
“I wasn’t crying. Devin’s exaggerating. I was surprised,” Malcolm replied through clenched teeth.
Devin kept going as if he wasn’t interrupted. “I understand you don’t want to start messing with someone who works for you, but when you finally have the opportunity to get what you’ve wanted, what do you do? You tell her no and leave. Man, you played yourself.”
“He’s right, bro. You should have just gone for it when you had the chance.”
Malcolm tried to rationalize. “I wanted to do the right thing. Kenyatta and Brad were on the outs, or supposed to be, I’m still her boss, and I was still with Jessica. My plan was to break up with Jessica and switch Kenyatta’s assignments to another manager to cut out all the drama.”
Devin shook his head. “Do you hear how stupid that sounds?”
“You’re too much of a choir boy. I would have hit that,” Jared said, shaking his head. “And you still had drama because you broke up with Jessica. And now you’re just mad at everybody, when the only person you should be mad at is yourself.”
“Exactly,” Devin said. “Let me ask you something, the next day when the two of you were in the stairwell, didn’t she agree to go out with you that night?”
“Kinda, but — ”
“Hold up, let me finish. Why would she do that if she knew Brad was coming? He must’ve popped in on her, and it was perfect timing on his part since you turned her away the night before. Of course, she’d act as if nothing happened. What would you have done if Jessica showed up at the conference?”
Malcolm didn’t answer, and Devin continued. “Exactly. You would have acted as if nothing happened and kept things business as usual. What did Brad say when you showed up at her door?”
“That he decided to come down and be with her or something like that. And that I should congratulate them on getting back together,” he spat out the last part.
“What else is he supposed to say? ‘Hey, come in and steal my girl?’ He’s not stupid. Anyone who’s ever been in a room with you two can see you’re both trying to hide the fact that you’re feeling each other.”
“It’s not that obvious,” Malcolm said.
Jared laughed. “Yeah, right.”
“It is that obvious. And I’m telling you, if my girl was out of town with a boss who was ready to jump her bones, I’d drop in, too. I’d tell her all the reasons I love her and get her so mixed up she wouldn’t even think about losing a good thing,” Devin finished.
What Devin said made sense when he thought about it rationally, without hurt and anger clouding his judgment. What would he have done if Jessica had shown up like that? It would have been too awkward to tell her they were breaking up because he almost slept with his employee. He would have just played it cool until he could talk with Kenyatta and figure out exactly what was between them. Considering how he pushed her away the night before, plus her confusion about Tangy, he understood why she would get back together with Brad. It did look like he was toying with her, especially if Brad had lied and told her he’d overheard him and Tangy talking about sleeping together. And her remarks in his office on Friday, when she said he only wanted her in his bed — if she believed that, then of course Brad would appear to be a safer choice.
“Have you talked to her since?” Devin asked.
“No, we’ve barely spoken since the conference.”
Jared narrowed his eyes at Malcolm. “You’ve been treating her like shit this week, haven’t you?”
Malcolm shifted and looked away. “Why would you say that?”
“Because I know you. Whenever someone does you wrong, you treat them all cold and shit. You’ve been ignoring her all week.”
“Until yesterday afternoon … ”
He told them about the scene is his office, including Brad’s lie about him and Tangy.
Jared scoffed and leaned against the car. “Aw, man, you might as well consider that door closed. If you had a chance after Florida, you killed it. She’s probably sitting with him now picking out honeymoon locations.” He pointed at Malcolm. “You need to watch that guy. He’s slick and definitely on to you.�
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“He’s right, man. Brad knows you’re trying to move in on his lady. But besides that, what the hell were you thinking when you did that to her?” Devin asked him.
“I wasn’t thinking.”
Jared nodded. “Damn right. You might as well buy her a wedding present.”
“That’s just it. I shouldn’t be in the middle of that anyway. If she wants to marry that jackass, it’s her business,” Malcolm said the words aloud to convince himself, but they felt wrong.
Jared stopped teasing and looked at his brother. “Dog, she wants you as much as you want her. I could understand if you were just after her for the hunt, but on the real, I see the way you look at her. I’ve listened to the way you talk about her, and I’ve seen you two together. That girl is feeling you as much as you’re feeling her.”
“And she’s engaged, not married. Engagements can be broken,” Devin added.
“So you think I should finish what I started?” Malcolm asked them.
Jared smirked. “Hell, yeah. You may have killed it this week though, but if she’s the one, then you gotta go for it. And if it doesn’t work out, you and Jessica can always get back together.”
“Nah, I need to leave Jessica alone. She’s ready to get married, or at least move in together. I can’t string her along anymore.”
Malcolm thought about the time he woke up from a dream where he was sleeping with Kenyatta only to find Jessica on top of him. He didn’t want to be in that situation again. Jessica deserved better than that.
He gave his last argument. “But we work together. I can’t sleep with one of my coworkers.”
“Why not?” Jared asked.
“Because it’s got trouble written all over it. Kenyatta is my best employee, so she already gets the good assignments. If we start sleeping together, it’ll look like I’m favoring her for personal reasons.”
Devin put his hand on his chin. “Aren’t you already doing that? And believe me — the folks in your office probably already think you’re sleeping with her.”
“It doesn’t matter what they think; it matters what they see. If we’re going to work together, we can’t sleep together. It would only complicate things further. I can barely get through the day without thinking about sleeping with her. If it were actually happening, I’d get nothing done at work.”
As soon as he spoke the words, Malcolm regretted them.
Jared laughed. “Damn, man, you really do have it bad.”
“C’mon, you know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean all right,” Jared continued to laugh. “You’d be tapping that ass all over the office is what you mean.”
Jared and Devin gave each other a fist pound and laughed. It was time to go. He’d said too much and wasn’t in the mood for jokes, even though Jared’s comment rang true. Once he and Kenyatta became lovers, things would never be the same. How could he work closely with her and not touch or kiss her?
He already had to fight himself daily to keep his hands off her. Once they made love, he wouldn’t be able to control himself. They would become the latest office scandal, and he’d vowed that would never happen again. He’d worked too hard on his career to blow his reputation on an office affair, no matter how real he believed his feelings for Kenyatta were. Plus, Kenyatta deserved better than that. He couldn’t put her in that position.
Malcolm shook his head. “It’s not worth it. It would tarnish her reputation and hurt my career.”
Devin grinned. “Not if you transfer her assignments to someone else.”
“What?”
“You just said that the reason you left her hot and bothered in Florida was because you had to come home and transfer her assignments to another manager. Do it. If you want her so damn much, make it happen.”
Malcolm shook his head. “She made her choice, and it’s Brad. Yesterday she told me I was the kind of guy she didn’t want, and he was.”
“What is she supposed to say? You kiss her and in the next breath tell her that you want to fuck her when she’s married. Now, if we’re wrong, and you only want to sleep with her … ” Devin let his voice trail off.
“I want her,” Malcolm stated simply. As soon as he said it, relief filled him. He wanted her, not just her body, but her. Entirely.
“Then tell her.”
Malcolm sighed. “I don’t know. It doesn’t mean she’ll change her mind.”
“Then change it for her,” Devin countered.
“You think it’s easy to change a woman’s mind?”
Devin smiled. “It sounds to me like you’ve got a lot of groveling to do.”
“Yeah, I might.”
Jared looked between the two and shook his head. “Damn, Malcolm. I’m gonna have to take your player card.”
Malcolm shoved his brother. “Shut up, man. You can’t play the field forever.”
“Says who?”
“Momma.”
Jared flinched. “Well, Ma’s just gonna be disappointed.”
“Tell her that at dinner tonight. Remember, she’ll be in town today.”
Jared frowned. “I didn’t know that.”
Malcolm rolled his eyes. “I told you earlier in the week. Come on, man, don’t disappoint her and bail on dinner.”
Jared sighed but nodded. “I guess I can break a few hearts in order to clear my Saturday night.”
Malcolm just shook his head. “Whatever, just be ready to meet us around six. I gotta bounce.”
Devin pointed at Malcolm. “Think about what I said, man. If you want her, fight for her.”
He nodded and got in his SUV. He had a lot to consider. Did he try to convince Kenyatta to leave Brad for good? If he did, what reason would he give her? It couldn’t just be that he wanted to sleep with her. He knew that would only put him in the category of men she tried to avoid. Would she believe him if he told her it was more than that? He’d done a good job of pretending to be indifferent before. But would she understand it was only because he didn’t want her, or anyone else in the office, to know just how much he was attracted to her?
Even if she did believe him, it didn’t mean she would leave Brad. But, how could she kiss him the way she did if she loved Brad? He wasn’t sure he was willing to put his feelings on the line. She might reject him and marry Brad anyway.
On top of that, they still worked together. Even if he transferred her assignments, there would still be talk throughout the office. He had been at the center of an office scandal before, and it wasn’t fun. He’d fled the scene the first time and left Tangy to contend with the aftermath. Would Kenyatta be willing to face that? It was almost too much to think about, but he knew he didn’t have a lot of time to make a decision. The longer he waited, the closer she would be to marrying Brad.
Chapter 21
Brad arrived promptly at seven P.M. Although his gray-and-blue striped button-up shirt, dark pants, and black loafers accentuated his slim frame, she automatically compared his build to Malcolm’s. She immediately chastised herself for letting Malcolm’s words affect her.
“You look beautiful,” Brad said when she answered the door.
“Thank you, Brad,” She smiled and smoothed the front of her pink sundress. She’d only put on a hint of lip gloss and pulled her hair into a loose ponytail, but Brad admired her as if she were dressed for a pageant. “You look great, too.”
He grinned and pulled her into his embrace. “I’ve been thinking about you all day,” he whispered in her ear. “That dress was made for you.” He drew back to look at her.
Kenyatta fought the urge to pull away; instead, she widened the smile on her face. It was becoming harder to respond to Brad’s increasingly frequent advances. Every time she felt his touch, she instantly remembered the warmth and strength of Malcolm’s hands. Whenever he kissed h
er, she remembered the taste of Malcolm’s kiss. The guilt for betraying Brad, even in her mind, was oppressing.
“It’s a new dress. I hoped you would like it,” She pulled away to grab her purse.
“I like it a lot.” He reached over to rub the back of her neck. “I like it enough to consider staying the night if you asked.”
Kenyatta froze. She wanted to be mad at him for bringing it up before next weekend, but she couldn’t. They’d dated long enough, reconciled recently and should be all over each other. Yet, she clung to the idea that she had another week before taking the next step.
Brad’s lips compressed into a hard line, and he turned away. Kenyatta couldn’t force herself to say the words he wanted to hear. She couldn’t sleep with him until she was sure marrying him was the right decision. Unfortunately for her, time was running out along with Brad’s seemingly endless reserve of patience.
“Look, Brad, it’s just that two weeks ago our engagement was off.”
He spun to face her. “That was your decision, not mine.”
“I know, but with the argument yesterday and my accepting the job with Jeremy, I just don’t want to complicate things.”
He took a staggering step back and held up his hand. “There are so many things wrong with that statement, I don’t even know where to start. Apparently, you’ve decided to take the job. Thank you for officially informing me. And second, you don’t want to complicate things with your fiancé by sleeping with him? Again, thank you for letting me know I’m a complication.”
Kenyatta closed her eyes. She’d tackle the easiest subject first. “Brad, I really want the job. It’s a great opportunity for me, and I’d be lying if I told you I’d rather stay at home waiting to get pregnant. It would be unfair to you if I lied.”
“I never said I wanted you to just sit at home and get pregnant. I told you in Orlando that I understand why you didn’t want to give up your work and that I would support you. I’m hurt you would make such a big decision without discussing it with me first. It’s like your father said, marriage is a partnership and both partners have to be on the same page. I want to be on the same page with you, Kenyatta.” He stepped forward and cupped her face in his hands. “I love you so much it hurts to think of you leaving me. If you want the job, fine, take it, but don’t forget that you’re my partner in life.”
Southern Love Page 15
