by Debra Kayn
"I'm sure there are things you can wear for job interviews and help you get away from prostitution," he added.
"I'm not going to Seattle with you." She waited until he looked at her. "Besides my friendship with Jacqueline, which was built out of necessity for both of us to survive Vince's hold on us, wasn't what you'd call true friendship. You know that, right?"
"What do you mean?"
"I lived on the streets before Vince convinced me to go home with him. My childhood consisted of a stepfather who decided since my mom wasn't alive he could use me for stand-in sex. When I couldn't take anymore, I dropped out of school and ran away. I lived in homeless shelters by night and walked more miles than I ever thought possible in the daytime to keep myself safe from predators. But the biggest predator of all found me. Vince took me home and flaunted me in front of the women who he put out on the street corners prostituting and took delight into claiming I was his by only allowing members of Sparrows to get their dick sucked by me as if my golden pussy held some magical hold over him." She laughed bitterly. "Do you want to hear the really sick part?"
Dawson sat up and fisted his hands. She couldn't wait for him to inquire about more because she had to tell him. He needed to understand she wasn't a friend of his sisters but a whore. That he wasted his time trying to help her because she deserved nothing from him.
"I've worked for the last nine months for the Network, and I only give blowjobs to the customers. I don't have sex with them, because Vince forbid any other man to take what was his. Even though when I left he had no idea where I went and now he's dead, I'm still only sucking dick and saving myself for him because I've been hit in the head, stomped on, paraded naked, and abused until the thought of sex makes me violently sick." She gasped for breath. "Your sister was not a whore. She was in love with Vince, and even though I stood in her way because of where Vince forced me into his life, she continued to love him. He only sent her out to the corners because he convinced her if she loved him and wanted to stay with him, she'd do him one more favor. One more favor turned into two and three, and Vince got off on using her. He loved rubbing her face in the fact that it was me he was fucking and slept in his bed, not Jacqueline. So, don't sit there acting like you know what your sister would want. She was too good for this life and despite the way I had to act, she was the one who took care of me when I hurt too much to get out of bed, and she cleaned the blood off my face after Vince took his anger out on me. But, I was not Jacqueline's friend. A friend would never—"
"Fuck," he said, exhaling loudly.
Dawson sprung from the bed and paced the room. She tossed her pillow to the side, scooted to the edge of the mattress, and stood. With the truth out in the room came freedom and she wanted him to leave her alone. She needed the reminder of her pitiful life, her mistakes, her sins, and Dawson's crazy idea that she was worth saving gone.
Most of all, she wanted the excitement and comfort he brought with him every time he came to her to stop. She didn't deserve any good feelings from him. Especially him.
"One time, Vince made Jacqueline watch me blow him off and proceeded to tell her all the reasons why I was the special one." Roni walked toward him, not letting him ignore what beat in her head every day. "She had tears running down her face, and I did nothing. I opened my mouth and let some man—"
"Shut the fuck up." Dawson pointed a finger in front of her face.
She jerked back, stumbled, and fell on her ass. Pain ricocheted through her wrist and up to her elbow, and she cried out.
Dawson hovered atop her, hands in front of him from his failed attempt at catching her. She shrank back, cradling her wrist against her chest. The intensity of his gaze bore into her leaving her cold and shaken.
She'd pushed him too far.
"I'm only going to pick you up," he said softly, moving slowly.
His hands went under her bent knees and behind her back. She left the floor and closed her eyes. If he hit her, she'd break. Deep down, she'd hoped Dawson was different. That his smooth voice, his gentle hands, his patience would be enough to handle her. But, it wasn't him she was scared of.
The fault was all hers. It was always her that went too far, fought back too often, and couldn't keep her mouth shut.
Dawson placed her on the bed and propped up her pillow. "I'll be right back."
He left the room without calling Jeremy first to make sure he could leave the building without the ladies spotting him. She closed her eyes against the onslaught of tears burning underneath her eyelids. She had only wanted him gone.
The pain and heartache she'd laid on him weren't something he needed to know. He deserved to believe his sister had no other choice. That her death was not his fault.
Dawson returned with a sandwich bag full of ice followed by Jeremy and Tiff. She scooted back against the headboard of the bed.
Tiff approached her first and sat on the edge of the mattress. "Dawson said you fell and hurt your hand."
She shook her head. "I'm fine."
"Let me see." Tiff took her hand gently. "Does it hurt to bend your wrist?"
"No." She glanced at Dawson talking to Jeremy on the other side of the room, and yet watching her. "I'm fine. My wrist is probably only bruised. I was clumsy and tripped over my feet."
"I can call Dr. Brandof and have him make sure nothing is broken." Tiff laid Roni's hand down on her lap.
"I'm okay. It's not broken, bloody, and I'm not in pain. Dawson is overreacting." Roni shrugged her shoulder and smiled. Her cheeks trembled at the attempt. "I think I'm tired, and a good sleep will help any soreness. If it still bothers me tomorrow, I'll tell the doctor during my visit."
Dawson approached the bed. "Here's some ice."
"Oh, let me get out of your way. The ice will help with any swelling." Tiff stood and moved back toward Jeremy. "If it hurts more during the night don't hesitate to come and get Marci or me."
Roni frowned. Tiff gazed at Dawson while she'd talked and not her.
"Thanks." Dawson took Tiff's place on the bed and placed the ice on Roni's wrist.
The door shut quietly. Roni's heart raced. Her madam left her in Dawson's care without a word of warning. Nothing about her stay at Red Light turned out as she'd imagined.
"We'll keep that on for twenty minutes and then you can take it off," said Dawson.
She held the ice in place. "I'll be fine. You should go."
"I'm spending the night. Tomorrow's your day off, and Jeremy said as long as I stay in the room, nobody has to know." Dawson shifted and lowered his head to catch her gaze. "I'll sleep on the other side of the bed, and before you start worrying, nothing is going to happen. I'm going to be here to make sure you're okay."
"My wrist will be fine tomorrow," she said. "It's nothing. It doesn't even hurt anymore."
"I'm not talking about your hand."
"What?" She frowned at him. "I don't understand."
"It's my fault you fell." His gaze softened. "You thought I was going to hit you."
"I..." She shook her head. There was no use arguing. Used to Vince backhanding her when she spoke out about the simplest things, she'd tried to escape Dawson's touch and stumbled.
"Let's get you ready for bed and then you can go to sleep." Dawson stood and pulled her to a sitting position by her good hand. "Do you need me to get you anything?"
She shook her head and stood up. Pretending he wasn't in the room, she gathered the old pair of sweats she used as pajamas and slipped into the bathroom anxious to get away from him. She couldn't understand why he wanted to stay after all the things she'd said about Jacqueline.
He had to hate her for ruining the image of his sister.
She brushed her teeth, popped a mint into her mouth, and took her day clothes off and put her sweats on. When she returned to the bedroom, Dawson had pulled down the bedspread for her.
Staying out of his reach, she crawled into bed and pulled the covers up to her armpits. Dawson came back to her side and held up the bag of ice.
She stuck her hand out on her pillow and let him situate the half-melted cold pack.
She held her breath, but when he kissed her forehead, she exhaled and squeezed her eyes closed. What could she do but let him stay in her room tonight? Tiff and Jeremy were on his side. They'd never believe she wanted him gone after she'd stayed quiet and allowed him to visit for a few weeks.
Dawson's shoes squeaked against the wooden floor. She opened her eyes. He'd gone to the other side of the bed behind her back. A dull ache settled in her stomach. She hadn't slept a full night with any man, except Vince.
The mattress dipped. She held her breath to hear his movements better. He'd kissed her on the mouth once after he'd turned her down when she offered him sex. He'd kissed her twice on the forehead since coming to Red Light. Her body warmed underneath the covers. She hated wondering if he would try to have sex with her tonight and she worried he wouldn't.
She hated him for making her feel confused.
She even hated him for making her feel attracted to him when she wanted him gone from her life.
If he were smart, he'd get up in the morning and leave Federal.
If she were sane, she'd give up the hope that he'd see her for more than a prostitute.
Dawson yawned. "Roni?"
"Hm?"
The bedspread pulled against her. She glanced over her shoulder at him rolling to his side. He laid on top of the covers, fully dressed.
"You smell and taste like wintergreen," he said.
She turned her head and tongued the Lifesaver. "Sorry."
"I like it."
Wanting to end the conversation, she took the mint out of her mouth, turned without moving her sore hand, and held the speck that was left of her Lifesaver out to him.
"Here," she said.
He popped the already sucked on mint into his mouth. "Thanks."
She rolled over onto her side, closed her eyes, and buried her face in the pillow and smiled. Maybe he wasn't like other men.
Chapter Eleven
Roni breathed softly from her side of the bed. Dawson laid on his side with his arm outstretched and his hand cupping the back of Roni's neck. Whether she slept fitfully all the time or last night's dreams were because he laid in the same bed, he discovered she only calmed when he placed his hand on her.
So, he stayed up all night to comfort her in the only way he knew how without freaking her out.
Last night remained heavy on his mind. The way she'd flinched, throwing herself away from him and flung her arm over her face when she believed he was going to hit her made him regret his reaction to hearing what Jaqueline had done during his prison sentence. Roni took his frustration from being unable to help his sister and believed he'd become violent.
For a split second, before she found herself on her ass on the floor, he'd witnessed the stark terror she'd lived through with Vince, and probably her stepfather, too.
He couldn't believe how incredibly wrong her opinion was about herself.
She was a friend to Jacqueline and knowing his sister, she had liked Roni, too. Having been raised in a loving home, Jacqueline probably found herself trying to help Roni. That's what friends do for each other, and if his sister wanted to help Roni, nobody would have been able to stop her.
The night Jacqueline had called and begged him to take Roni out of the house before Vince killed her, he'd heard the fear in his sister's voice. But, he also heard determination. Once his sister got the idea for something, she never failed, because she never gave up.
A soft knock came from the door. He gently removed his hand, waiting to find out if Roni would wake. When she continued sleeping, he slowly got off the bed and went to the door.
Jeremy stood on the other side and motioned him into the hall. He closed the door softly behind him.
"The ladies will be getting up in an hour. You'll need to go now or wait until they leave for their doctor appointments," said Jeremy.
He rotated his stiff shoulders. "I'm ready."
Tiff came out of a plain colored door down the hall and held up her hand. He stood beside Jeremy and waited for Tiff to waddle down the hall.
Tiff stopped and put her hand on Jeremy's arm and looked at Dawson. "I want to talk to you downstairs."
Dawson nodded and followed both of them down the stairs and into Silver Girls. Last night, they hadn't questioned his request to stay in Roni's room. He expected to give them a reason and a better explanation this morning of what happened to cause Roni to fall and hurt her wrist.
Downstairs, Tiff led them over to a table. "We can talk here without worry of being overheard."
Dawson sat down and took notice that Jeremy remained standing. "I want to thank you both for letting me stay last night."
"What happened in Roni's room last night?" Tiff sat forward and braced her elbows on the table. "Don’t give me some bullshit story about how Roni tripped over her feet."
"How much do you know about Roni's background?" he asked.
Tiff studied him. "The Network makes sure none of the women are felons, and they're healthy. Upon arrival here, the sheriff fingerprints them all, because I don't trust anyone, and I'd prefer to keep any trouble away from my doorstep. Beyond that, it's not my place to question the life they had led before they stepped foot into my building."
"I used to belong to Sparrows," he said.
Tiff glanced behind her at Jeremy before looking at him again. "Explain."
"A small organization that made their money underground in Seattle." He thumped his thumb against the table. "A little over four years ago, I got picked up for chopping vehicles and ended up in prison."
"That's where you met Jeremy?" asked Tiff frowning. "How does that work if you were arrested in Washington? Jeremy was in a state prison in Idaho."
"The state prison I was originally housed at was privately owned. Half the inmates got transferred to other prisons when the state bought the penitentiary and the building had to be brought up to code with the new regulations. It took about a year, and then I was transferred back to Washington to serve the rest of my sentence."
"Okay, go on," said Tiff.
"Anyway, after four years, I was released. I found out Vince, the leader of Sparrows, picked up my sister and had her working the streets for him. He kept me from contacting her, but I got one of the members to get a cell phone to her so I could contact her. She called me wanting out and made me promise to rescue her friend, Roni, too."
"Dear Lord," she whispered.
"It took me three days to work out a plan, find out which street she was working, and obtain the firepower to take her away from Vince." He cleared his throat. "The night I was going to make my move, the police showed up at my apartment and informed me my sister was found raped and killed in a park one block from Vince's house."
Tiff's mouth thinned. He rubbed his jaw. That night fresh in his mind, he broke out in sweat despite the chill in the air.
"When I got the news, I lost it." He ran his tongue over his teeth. "Then, with everything that needed to be done at the police station and dealing with the funeral home, I had forgotten about my promise to my sister about getting Roni out of Vince's house. By the time I got inside to rescue Roni, she was gone. I staked out his place for a couple of days, and witnessed Vince threatening everyone around him to find Roni and bring her back to him."
"She ran away?" Tiff cocked her head.
"Yeah, and then Vince ended up murdered, and I went looking for Roni to help her get on with her life and away from prostitution. It took me nine months to track her here." He scooted back his chair. "Vince abused her."
"How bad?"
Dawson glanced at Jeremy before answering. "I'm surprised she's not dead."
"Son of a bitch," muttered Tiff. "That poor girl. I thought she was shy."
"She is." Dawson grimaced. "For a good reason. She lives as if Vince is going to walk back in her life and hold her accountable for what she's doing. I want her away from selling her body."
&nbs
p; "Do you have the money to take care of her," asked Jeremy, entering the conversation.
"Yeah." He waved off Jeremy's concern. "I thought spending time with her would be enough to get her head wrapped around wanting a better life, but I don't know. She opens up and then she withdraws from me. Last night, she lashed out. She said some things I didn't want to hear. It was as if she was trying to get me to hit her."
"Did you hit her?" Tiff straightened in the chair and held his gaze.
"No. I'd never hit a woman." He inhaled. "I put my hand up to get her to stop talking, and she thought I was going to strike her. That's when she fell. I scared her, and it was like a reflex. She ducked and was down."
"Fuck," mumbled Jeremy, pulling on his beard. "You said this Vince guy was dead, huh?"
"Yeah."
Tiff stood. "There're only seven more weeks, and Red Light is closing. Roni will be leaving. I think you need to do whatever you can to get her to go now."
"Hang on." Jeremy stepped back up to the table. "Do you think that's wise to send her out without the Network supporting her because, for all we know, you could be putting her out on the street. If she doesn't trust Dawson, she'll run. She's already proven that she's capable of running away."
"I don't want to hold her prisoner." Dawson stood. "I can support her until she gets a legitimate job that doesn't involve letting someone use her body. I've got a place with an extra room."
"Jeremy's right. If she doesn't trust you, you'll never be able to keep her long enough to help her." Tiff pushed herself to her feet, groaning. "She's got two days off starting today. Let me have some time with her."
"I don't want you involved," said Jeremy.
"Too late." Tiff patted Jeremy's chest. "I take care of my ladies."
"I appreciate any help." The tightness in Dawson's chest eased. The whole time he'd stayed with Roni, tried to get her to talk and dream about life away from selling herself, he ended up more frustrated. He had no idea what would help Roni understand she deserved better than the life she was living. "Have you ever had a sex worker show up with a past filled with abuse?"
