That woman was the love of my life, and I had broken her heart. No, I had shattered her heart. Not only had I told her that there wasn’t anything between us, but I hadn’t even acknowledged how she felt about her kids. She was worried for their safety, and though I had a feeling it was a trap, I had blown it off as though it was nothing.
No wonder she had gone. She was heartbroken, and she thought I didn’t care about the place she called home. Hell, I had told her so many times that I didn’t, no wonder she had believed me.
How many times had I told her that it was their choice to do what they wanted? How many times had I insisted my way was right?
Now, we flew into town without a care for the cops who were trying to pull us over. We had somewhere to be and we knew we’d need back up when we go there. Let the cops follow.
I knew she would be at the high school. That’s where they wanted her, after all. And, I was right. Smoke was rising in the air. We could see it from the moment we headed into town. We didn’t stop as we roared up Main Street, weaving in and out of traffic, blowing through stop signs and street lights.
Hell, we didn’t even stop to take cover when we reached the school. We rode right into the thick of it, bursting through the flames and the smoke with our guns blazing.
The cartel clearly had their ambush planned, but they didn’t plan on us being there as well. With military training and aim better than anything the Souls could bring to the table, Gunner and Brutus started dropping men left and right.
I was on a mission, however; I wasn’t interested in shooting, I had to find Meg.
There was rubble scattered everywhere, and glass on the floor. But it didn’t take me long to find her. She was lying on her side, her hand over her stomach. Blood was oozing out between her fingers, and I felt sick to my stomach as I ran to her. I scooped her up in my arms, holding her close as the gunfire faded around me.
“Call for an ambulance!” I screamed. “Get the EMTs here now!”
There were still men running around, some firing shots, others taking cover. The cops who had been trying to pull us over had been drawn into the fight, and the cops that had been holding back, trying to assess the situation as the battle raged on were also now involved.
I didn’t know where Cutter was, and I frankly didn’t care. Shit, I didn’t even care if the man had been killed in the battle. All I cared about was the woman in my arms.
“I’m so sorry,” I said as I held her limp, lifeless body. “I’m so sorry. Hang in there, baby, help is on the way. Please, hang in there. I love you! I can’t lose you.”
“How is she?” I asked as I leapt from the seat. The doctor had just entered the room, and both Cutter and I rose at the same time. He had only taken a bullet to the arm and had been waiting alongside me for his sister to come out of surgery.
We didn’t talk much. He thanked me for not only taking care of her, but for coming to their aid when the cartel was closing in, and I made sure our agreement was still in place. But besides that, we had sat in silence.
There was nothing to say to him. We had fought for so long over the years, I didn’t want to fight with him anymore. I didn’t want anything to do with him. All I wanted was Meg.
“She pulled through. She’s resting now, and her recovery will be long, but she’s going to be okay. She was really lucky. If that bullet had been an inch in any direction she could have been paralyzed, or even killed,” she said.
I breathed a sigh of relief. I wanted to fall to my knees and break down, but I’d never show that sort of emotion in front of Cutter. Even though he seemed to be thinking the same.
“Can I see her?” I asked.
“She’s resting, but you can both come back and see her in an hour or so, after she wakes,” the doctor said before leaving the room.
“You can go,” Cutter announced as soon as we were alone.
“What?” I looked at him.
“I said, you can go. You did what you were hired to do, and now it’s time for you to fuck off,” he said. “Do you think I didn’t see the look on your face as the EMTs arrived? Something happened between you two. It was written all over your ugly mug.”
“Have you always been so observant?” I replied condescendingly.
“Tell me I’m wrong,” he challenged.
I hesitated. My first instinct was to tell him he was wrong, but I couldn’t. I had made that mistake once, and I wasn’t going to do it again. I loved Meg, and I would tell her and anyone else how I felt. I wasn’t going to lose her. I’d come too close to that today already.
I thought I was doing the right thing by letting her go, but I couldn’t have been more wrong, that was for damn sure. Now, I was going to stand by my emotions, and my feelings for that woman. I was going to be there for her, no matter what. And if he had a problem with it, Cutter could go fuck himself.
“I’m going to make sure she’s okay,” I said as I sat back down. “If you want to make a scene, go for it.” But he didn’t.
We waited for another tense hour until the nurse allowed us to see her, then we both fought to be civil as we followed her to the room.
“This is going to need to stay brief and quiet,” she said. “Fifteen minutes.”
“Thanks,” I pushed through the door, letting Cutter straggle behind. Meg was laying on the bed, her eyes open, staring at the ceiling. She looked tired but seeing her alive brought me more relief than I knew possible. I walked up to the bed, smiling as she looked at me.
She said nothing, letting her eyes fall.
“Meg,” I started. “I’m sorry. For everything.”
She looked up at me in surprise, and I continued. “I love you, and I thought I was doing the right thing by letting you go. I didn’t want you to have to choose between your home and me, between your blood and me, and I think we both know that’s what was going to happen. But I went about it the wrong way. It was a mistake, and I’m sorry.”
Meg was clearly surprised. She looked at Cutter who was clearly pissed, then back at me. “You came for me?”
“Of course. I always will,” I said. “But by the time I showed up, it was too late, you’d been shot.”
“That was my fault,” Megan replied. “I should have listened to you, and I’m sorry.”
“I want you to come home with me,” I said, feeling bolder now. I didn’t care if Cutter was right there. “I want you to work from Ridgecrest, and I want you to be in my life. Shit. What am I saying? You are my life.”
“Trip I --” Meg started. There were tears in her eyes, but a smile was at the corners of her mouth. I knew she was forgiving, just as I was willing to forgive her for running away and nearly getting herself killed. I didn’t hold it against her, and she didn’t hold my mistakes against me.
It was part of the reason I knew we’d be great together.
“Don’t listen to this asshole,” Cutter butted in. “Your place is here.”
Megan sighed, laying back on the pillow as though defeated. “I don’t think it is anymore, Cutter.”
“What the fuck are you talking about? What about the kids? What about all the work you do here?” he asked. I could see in her face that his words were hitting home, and I knew my chance to keep her was fading. The thought of losing her again filled me with rage, but I knew that wasn’t going to get me anywhere.
So, I took a different approach. Cutter clearly controlled her through manipulation, but I’d use his tactics to set her free.
“What about love? What about your own happiness? You don’t have to be here to make a difference, Meg. There are a lot of people in Ridgecrest and the surrounding towns who need you, and you know that’s true,” I said.
Cutter looked outraged, but before the conversation could go further, the nurse poked her head back in the room. “Okay, times up. We’ve got to let the patient get her rest.”
“I’ll be back to get you as soon as the doctor says you can leave,” Cutter said. “And I’m going to take you home, and we’re g
oing to forget about this entire thing. The cartel is gone, and we aren’t going to have to worry about them anymore. You’re going to go back to your teaching, and I’m going to get back to the way things used to be, too.”
Megan nodded, though I could see the uncertainty in her eyes. She was used to the way things had been. It had just been her and Cutter for so long, she didn’t know any life outside of that. But I would gladly show her one.
She had spent her entire life living for other people, doing what she thought was best for them, what she thought they wanted her to do. She didn’t think about herself at all. Sure, there were some ways that was good, but there were many ways I knew it was slowly killing her inside.
Megan didn’t get to live her life, and I felt bad for her. I wanted her to be happy, even if that meant she didn’t want to go with me. If Cutter was right, and this was her place, then I wanted her to stay.
But I wanted her to make the decision for herself. No more listening to what other people wanted her to do. Just the choice that would make her happy.
For her.
I looked over at Meg one last time before following the nurse out the door. “Think about what I said and make the decision that’s right for you.”
24
Megan
It was a restless night of staring at the ceiling. So many things had happened over the past forty-eight hours, I wasn’t sure what to make of any of it. I had done what I thought was best, going against what Trip had said to come back to Barstow.
And doing it had almost cost me my life.
But I couldn’t deny with each mile I passed on the bus coming home, that I felt my heart breaking a little bit more. Trip had shattered my heart with what he said to me that last night in the apartment, but there was a large part of me that didn’t believe what he said was true.
He didn’t want to encourage me to do anything that was going to hurt in the long run. He didn’t want there to be trouble for his town anymore, and he didn’t want any more trouble with the Souls.
He didn’t want me to have to give up my school or my kids, so he did what he thought was best. For me.
Cutter only ever did what he thought was best for himself. He never considered other people in his decisions. It was all about him and what he wanted. What he could get out of people and out of life. He didn’t care if he hurt anyone, he didn’t care if he broke anyone.
For all the apologizing he’d done in the school, I knew that his remorse only went so far. We’d survived the ordeal and he was back to being the same selfish prick he’d always been. So much for our big breakthrough. He didn’t care if I was happy or not. He just didn’t want Trip to have me. He knew how to work me in a way that would lead me to believe it was best for me to stay here, but that would be for him.
If he wanted me to be happy, he would have told me to do what made me happy.
Like Trip had done.
He no longer pushed me away, but he wasn’t pushing me to do anything, either. He just wanted me to be happy – to make the decision that was right for me. Regardless of what that meant for him or anyone else.
I sighed as I tossed and turned. It was going to be hard to get any kind of sleep knowing what I wanted and fearing reaching out and taking it. I closed my eyes, trying to get some sleep, but the thought kept running through my brain over and over again. I had to do what was best for me. What was best for me.
“Good morning!” the nurse startled me awake, and I looked at her with wide eyes.
“Sorry, I just thought you’d be ready to get out of here,” she said. “A friend of yours – she said her name was Kate – dropped off some clothes for you last night, but it was after visiting hours, so we kept it up front.”
Bless you, Kate.
“Thanks,” I said. She didn’t bother asking whether I wanted help getting dressed or not, and promptly started doing it herself. I wanted to argue I was fine, but after a few days of being in their care, I knew better than to try to get staff to let me do anything on my own. The nurse helped me out of the gown and into the shirt and jeans, then she tied my shoes.
She wheeled me to the front of the hospital and helped me through the discharge papers, then with a smile pointed me out the door. “Remember to take your medication as prescribed, and call if you need anything. Your follow up appointment with your doctor is on your discharge papers.”
“Thank you,” I said. I grabbed my purse and slowly made my way through the door, finding Cutter standing outside his truck. He walked quickly up to me.
“Let’s go,” he said. I looked around.
“Where’s Trip?” I asked.
“Probably heading back,” he said. “What’s it matter?”
“He didn’t say goodbye,” I replied.
“He tried this morning, but you weren’t awake, so he left,” Cutter said. My heart sank. I tried not to let myself feel anything, but it was hard not to. Trip had said that he loved me, so why would he leave? A black pickup pulled up the drive and stopped right in front of us. Trip opened the door and hopped out, a smile on his face as he saw me.
“Good morning beautiful,” he said, sauntering over.
“Good morning,” I said in return, as Cutter huffed and puffed next to me, trying to hustle me into his own truck.
“Meg, come on, I’ve got shit to do today,” he said. “And so do you.”
“No,” I said.
“What?” he looked at me as though I’d suddenly sprouted a second head.
“No, Cutter, I’m not going to with. I’m going with Trip,” I said.
“The fuck you are!” he snapped.
“You aren’t in charge of me!” I shot back. “I’m a grown-ass woman, and I’m free to make my own decisions! I’m going with Trip, whether you like it or not!”
He looked from one of us to the other, then Trip laughed. “I hope our agreement is still in place?”
“Fuck you,” Cutter spat. He got in the truck and closed the door, but he paused. “If you ever come to your senses, I’ll be here.”
“Love you too, big bro,” I said, shaking my head.
He nodded and drove off, leaving me standing with Trip in the parking lot. We watched him leave and exchanged a glance, then both burst out laughing.
“Come on,” he said. “Let’s go home.”
His shirt fell to the floor, then mine. My bra landed on the floor, then his jeans. My jeans almost made it to the bed, then both my panties and his boxers hit the ground at almost the same time.
Trip was kissing me the entire time we made our way from the door to his bedroom, and our clothes left a trail showing where we’d been. He had his hand around my back, helping me lie on the bed with my injured abdomen. He was being so gentle, but we were so full of need, we had to have each other, I didn’t care about the pain.
He crawled onto the bed next to me, his mouth on my lips, my neck, my tits. He ran his tongue right to the tip of my bandage, then he made his way back to my nipple once more. I closed my eyes, running my hands through his hair, holding him against me.
I wanted him on top of me, to feel the comforting pressure of his weigh over me, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it just yet. It had been nearly two weeks since my shooting and subsequent surgery and though the pain was lessening each day, it was still enough to restrict some of my movements.
But I wanted to feel my man inside me, so I would find a way.
Trip was mine, and I was his. I basked in the knowledge of it and let myself revel in every touch, every kiss.
He ran his hand over my pussy, sending chills up my spine. I put my arms out, looping my fingers together behind his neck, looking into his eyes as he pleasured me.
“I need you inside me,” I whispered.
“Are you sure?” he asked, his eyes dark with need but still full of concern.
“I’m sure Trip. I need you. It’s been too long.”
He nodded his head and rolled onto his back, pulling me will him so I could straddle him.
In that position, I could be in control of our pleasure without risking any harm to my still-healing stomach. I raised up over him as he kneaded my breasts, pulling my nipples to taut peaks with his fingers.
Reaching between us, I grabbed his thick cock and centered it at my slit. Taking a breath, I slid down over him, taking his entire length inside me at once. I sat for a moment, allowing his girth to stretch me open fully before I started rocking back and forth in a slow but steady rhythm.
“Fuck you feel so good,” he growled.
“God Trip, I’ve missed this,” I purred in return.
“Slade,” he said through gritted teeth as he held onto my hips and thrust up into me.
“What?” I asked, confusion in my voice.
“It’s my name. Slade. I want to hear you scream it when you come,” he grunted.
“Slade,” I let the sound draw out on my tongue like a sigh. There was something about having that little piece of him that was a huge turn on.
My insides tightened and I carefully increased the speed of my hips. Looking down at where he ended and I began filled me will a heat I never knew possible.
“Good God, baby, I can’t hold out much longer,” he said, his jaw clenched in concentration.
I smiled down at him and reached down to rub my clit in slow circles. His eyes narrowed as he slapped my hand away and took over with this thumb.
“That’s my job,” he ground out.
“Mmmmm, and you’re very good at it,” I sighed as my orgasm started to build.
Trip was straining, lifting his hips and thrusting as deeply as he could as I rode him. His pressure on my clit increased and suddenly my vision went blurry as I came harder than I ever had before in my life.
“Oh God, Slade!” I cried out as the waves rolled over me again and again.
“Fuck!” he cursed as his dick twitched, spilling his seed deep into my womb.
I shuddered on top of him as he filled me and another orgasm ripped through me at the sensation. My head dropped forward, and I braced myself with my hands against his sculpted chest to keep from falling over.
Men in Charge: A Contemporary Romance Box Set Page 58
