"Where are Ryan and Paul?" I ask.
"Ryan is on the surgical floor waiting room with Rachel's parents." A slight smile graces Gloria's face. "That boy never ceases to make me proud. I know he is an emotional wreck inside, but he is consoling Rachel's family, and making sure they are staying positive."
Of course. Ryan is a psychologist, and will put his feelings aside and deal with them later. From the very start of our relationship, Ryan was always the one who took care of Paul and me. That has never changed, and is what makes me love him so deeply.
"And Paul?"
Gloria sighs, and tips her head to the side. "I have no idea where my darling son is. He said he needed some time alone, and took off down the hallway." She grasps my hand in hers. "Go find him, Kylie. You know he can't handle this type of thing. He's a problem-solver, and this is a problem he can't solve. He won't let any of us in, but you're a different story."
I nod at her. "I'll go look for him."
Gloria squeezes my hand and mouths, "thank you," before returning to her husband and daughter. She slides onto the love seat next to Kayla and rubs the young woman's back.
Alex's arm slips around my waist, and his lips press against the side of my head. "Go take care of Paul. I'll stay here and make sure Robert and Gloria are taken care of. If I hear anything, I'll text you."
God, this man. He is the only warmth I have at the moment. Paul, Ryan, and their families have become as important to him as they are to me. They have welcomed him into their lives, and he has never taken their love for granted. He has opened up his life and his heart for the people I hold most dear in mine.
I face him, and stare into his eyes. The calm strength settles my nerves, quietly assuring me everything will be all right. "I love you so much."
I walk down the hall in the direction Gloria pointed, but don't see Paul. Entering the stairwell, I descend, the metal clanging through the isolated space. I reach the landing, pull open the door, and step into the wide open entryway of the hospital. To the left, just passed the information desk, is the hallway that leads to the cafeteria. I walk into the large dining room, and glance around the half full space.
Damn, I thought for sure he would've come here to grab coffee, sit at a table, and stare out the window.
I duck into the gift shop, and am disappointed once again at not seeing him anywhere inside. Standing in the middle of the reception area, I glance around the space. My heart is beating double-time, and anger is just starting to warm my blood. I can't believe he would up and disappear at a time like this. Where the hell are you, Paul?
A sign at the entrance of another hallway points to the chapel. I walk towards the stained-glass windows, and slowly open the door to peek inside. It's a small space with three short rows of pews on either side of the middle aisle that leads to an altar. A gold cross on a wood base sits in the center flanked by matching flower arrangements.
I sweep my gaze around the sanctuary, stopping when they land on a man whose size looks too big for this small space. Paul is in the second row on the right, and is the only other person here. His head is dropped and his shoulders slumped. I sit next to him and slide my hand down his arm resting on his thigh, and intertwine my fingers with his. He lifts his head and glances at me.
"Hey, K. Did Mom send you to find me?"
"Yeah, but I would've come looking on my own."
He glances up at the altar. "Bet this is the last place you expected to find me."
"Second to the last." I bump my shoulder against his, and lets out a chuckle.
He wraps his free hand around our joined hands, and rubs the back of my hand. "I don't know what to do—or how to feel, K. I envisioned a lot of scenarios of how this was going to play out, but this was never one of them. When Ryan came out of the delivery room and told us the baby's heart rate had dropped and they were rushing Rachel to surgery to perform a c-section, my mind went blank. My whole body went numb."
He pauses, and takes in a deep breath, holding it for a moment before slowly releasing it.
"This was Ryan's dream more than mine. He wanted a child, and I wanted to make him happy. I mean, I wasn't opposed to the idea, I just had never considered being a parent. When I finally accepted I was gay, I sort of gave up on the idea of being a father. Ryan never did, though."
Neither had I until Ryan approached me about helping them with the legalities of adopting a baby, and I had agreed to help them.
"I couldn't even tell you when I starting falling in love with the little ninja, but I didn't realize the depths of it until we got here. Now, we're so close to being parents, and it could all be taken away from us."
He drops his head. His shoulders rise and fall, his body shaking with the movement. I turn into him, and wrap my arms around his neck. Lifting his head, he buries it against my shoulder.
There is very little that shakes me to my core, and reduces me to a puddle. Paul weeping in my arms is at the top of my list. I want to say something, offer him sage words that will ease his breaking heart and give him strength. But what? I can't tell him everything will be okay, because what if it's not? I don't know enough about what's happening, and giving him false hope is not something I do. Besides the fact that anything I say would be hollow.
So, I'll just hold him as long as he needs me to. That's probably what he wants more than empty words and promises. Comfort without fear. And no judgment.
My phone buzzes in my coat pocket. A text from Alex.
Did you find Paul?
Yes.
Ryan has news. You should probably come back for it. He wants to tell Paul first.
Good or bad?
The pause seems to drag on, and my heart plummets into the angry pit of my stomach.
I don't know, babe. Just come back.
"They need us to go back, Paul."
He wipes the tears from his face and nods. Standing, he clears his throat and reaches for my hand. "Let's do this."
I stand and turn to leave, my hand still in Paul's firm grip.
He gives my arm a slight tug. "You know you're not just a friend, right? You couldn't be anymore my sister than if you had the same blood. Next to Ryan, there is no one I trust more."
A lump lodges in my throat. At least it stifles the sob trying to break free from my chest, but it also means I can't speak. So, I nod and kiss Paul's cheek.
He leads me down the aisle towards the doors.
Please God, let the baby and Rachel be okay.
* * *
Ryan is at the elevator, and pulls Paul to the side, as soon as we step out. Entering the waiting room, I walk into Alex's embrace. Glancing around the room, every face has the same tentative expression.
Hope for the best, but expect the worst…
Ryan and Paul finally return. "Rachel is out of surgery. Both her and the baby are fine," Paul says.
There is a collective release of air in the room. Relief rushes through me as tension is swept away. I feel almost numb in the aftermath. My limbs are heavy, but my heart is light.
"Well?” Robert asks. "Boy or girl?"
Ryan and Paul smile at each other, and I didn't think my soul could fit anymore joy. Seeing them so happy expands my heart to the point where it's pushing against my ribs trying to break free.
"It's a boy," Ryan says.
The room erupts in cheers. Gloria and Robert embrace the new parents, and soon a swarm of people engulfs them. Alex and I step back. There will be plenty of time for us to congratulate them.
"Where's my bag?" I ask Alex, glancing around me for my attaché.
Pointing behind me, Alex says, "I put it in the corner behind the chairs so it would be out of the way."
I sit, pull the bag out, and open it up. While everyone else celebrates, my job is far from over. Legal loopholes need to be closed up, and papers signed, filed, and certified. I check the paperwork to make sure I grabbed everything from my desk in my haste to get packed and get up here.
Passing my attaché to Ale
x, I stand. "Be right back. I need to find out when I can see Rachel. There's still some paperwork she needs to sign before this is all legal, and Ryan and Paul can take the baby home."
There is also still a chance my best friends’ hopes and dreams could be dashed. Rachel can change her mind about the adoption, and keep the baby.
Eighteen
Ryan and Paul are waiting for me at the desk next to the bank of elevators.
"Did you get any sleep last night?" I ask.
Paul pushes the up button, glances at Ryan, and shakes his head.
"We tried," Ryan says and chuckles. "But we were too excited."
Paul jerks his head towards Ryan. "Daddy Ryan had an all night OCD episode. Every nook and cranny of the apartment is sanitized, and everything in the baby's room perfectly placed."
I laugh. "I'm guessing before the day is over, that won't be a priority any longer."
The elevator dings, and the doors slide open. "So what happens now, K?" Paul asks as we ascend to the second floor.
"I go over the paperwork with Rachel, and make sure she understands the seriousness of what she is doing by terminating parental rights and allowing you both to adopt him. Once that's done, we meet with the hospital administrators, and get the okay to take the little guy home."
The doors open, and we step into the foyer of the second floor. Paul and Ryan glance at each other. The happy expressions have morphed into deep creases along their foreheads and scowls on their faces.
"You don't think she'll back out, do you, K?" Ryan asks, his eyes wide.
I try to force myself into lawyer mode, and detach emotionally. I want to be supportive, and tell them everything will be fine. Unfortunately, I've seen this sort of thing go very badly. Everything is tracking, and once the baby is born, the mother has a change of heart and decides to keep the baby.
I smile, and rub his upper arm. "Let me go find out."
Outside Rachel's room, I knock on the door and wait for someone to ask me in. Rachel is sitting up in bed eating applesauce from a cup. Her mother sits in the chair beside her bed.
"Hi, Rachel," I say. "Do you remember me? Kylie Stone."
There is not much of the innocent seventeen-year-old I met a few months earlier. Pregnancy seems to have aged her.
She nods at me. "Paul and Ryan's attorney. Please, come in. I'm just finishing up breakfast—or what I can stomach of it."
"How are you feeling?" I ask.
"Sore where they cut me open, but they have me on some good drugs, so it's not too bad."
Her mother glances up at me and smiles. "The doctor says the incision looks good, and she is recovering just fine. She should be able to go home tomorrow."
"Wow, that soon? They really get you out in hurry these days."
They both nod at me. An uncomfortable silence fills the room.
"Do you feel up to going over some paperwork and signing some things?" I ask.
"Sure," Rachel says. If she is thinking of changing her mind, she is hiding it well. "Mom, can you move this food tray out of the way? Or better yet, out of the room. Those things they are trying to pass off as eggs are making me nauseas."
Rachel's mother looks at me, her eyes questioning whether or not she should leave her daughter alone with me.
"I won't go over anything until you get back," I say.
She smiles, nods, and takes the tray out of the room.
I take the chair on the other side of the bed.
"I've known Ryan and Paul a really long time," I say. "We met at college our freshman year. I don't have family anymore, so meeting them was like finding brothers I never knew I had. I ended up getting sick at the end of the first year of college, and had to have emergency surgery. Ryan and Paul stayed with me through all of it, even though it screwed up their summer plans. They nursed me back to health."
"Really, wow, that was nice of them."
"Yeah, that's just how they are. Ryan was born to be a nurturer. And Paul has a gruff exterior, but he's really a softy on the inside."
She nods, and glances down at her fingers as they play with the blanket covering her legs. "Can I ask you something?"
"Of course."
"Is the baby okay? I've asked the nurses, but they just say 'yes' and then change the subject like I'm not allowed to know anything about him."
And there she was, transformed right in front of my eyes. The scared seventeen year old girl that I had met a few months ago.
"Yes, he's fine. I'm sorry they wouldn't tell you more about him. They performed the c-section, and except for the initial distress he was in, had no complications during the birth or since. He weighed 7 pounds, and from what I understand, has a healthy set of lungs." I glance at her mother, who slips back into her chair. "Is there anything else you'd like to know?"
Rachel looks at her mother and points to the bedside table. Her mother opens the drawer, and pulls out a stuffed toy, and hands it to Rachel.
"What's his name?" Rachel asks, her eyes on the stuffed animal in her hands. I can't tell what it is.
I inhale slowly. "They haven't told me yet," I say, which is true. Even if I did know, however, I would probably not tell her. Ryan and Paul can decide how much information and contact they want her to have. "I think they are going to have a big name reveal later today or tomorrow."
Rachel takes a deep breath. She stares at the toy in her hands, and then hands it to me. "I got this for him a few days ago. I saw it in one of the stores Ryan and I were in and it reminded me of my favorite stuffed animal when I was little."
"Still has it," her mother says with a smile. "It's sitting on the shelf in your bedroom."
I look down at the teddy bear.
Rachel swipes at the tears sitting on the edge of her lower eyelids. "I was going to keep it to remind me of the baby, you know, if I felt sad or lonely or something. But, I think I'd rather give it to the baby. I understand if Ryan and Paul don't want him to have it—or if they don't want to tell him it's from me—but could you take it to them for me, just in case?"
"Absolutely." I turn away and place the bear on the seat next to my briefcase, take a steadying breath, and force back the tears that threaten. "Ready to go through the paperwork?" I ask, facing her, and forcing a smile on my face.
Nodding, she smooths out the blanket over her legs. "Yep. Let's do it before my meds kick in and I fall asleep while signing my name." She giggles, and I welcome the return of the teenager.
* * *
Opening the door to Ryan and Paul's apartment, all eyes are on me as I step inside. Apparently, everyone is excited to see the newest member of the family come home for the first time. I look around the room and spot Alex, and step over to him.
"Everything good?" Alex asks, wrapping his arm around me.
I nod. "Now I remember why I don't practice family law, or handle adoptions on a regular basis. I'm emotionally drained."
Alex chuckles and kisses my forehead.
The door opens. I turn my head as Paul walks inside with a blue puff ball in his arms. Ryan insisted on putting the baby in a winter snowsuit. The poor kid was lost beneath the coat and blankets bundling him. Ryan fumbles with the zipper and frees the baby from the snowsuit.
Nestling the baby in the crook of his arm, Ryan gives everyone their first glimpse of his son. Surprisingly, the baby wasn't awakened with all the jostling around by the new parents. His head peeks out the top of the blanket bundle, a shock of blonde hair sticking up.
"This has been a long journey for all of us," Ryan says, his voice low. "We weren't sure we would be able to adopt, and never believed it would happen as fast as it did. Stars aligned, and things fell into place. We also had our secret weapon and kick ass attorney ensuring things went smoothly."
Paul leans over and kisses the baby's head. "We are truly blessed to have family and friends that support us. This little guy will have lots of love—and babysitters, I hope." He raises his eyebrows and looks around the room. Low chuckles drift through the room.
"Seriously, though, we couldn't have done it without you all, and will never be able to thank you for everything you've done for us."
Ryan lifts the baby up a little, and a scene from The Lion King runs through my head. "So, without further ado, we would like to introduce you to Robert Kyle."
My breathing halts. Tears sting the back of my eyes. Alex wraps his arms around me from behind, and kisses my shoulder. I swallow hard, shaking my head at Ryan and Paul.
"What are you going to call him?" someone from the other side of the room asks. "Rob? Bobby? Bert?"
Paul looks straight at me. "We're going to call him Kyle,"
I smile, and mouth "love you."
Paul points to me and smiles. Everyone in the room closes in around the new family to get a quick peek at my namesake.
I'm overwhelmed at the love and honor my friends have bestowed on me, and I turn into Alex and bury my face in the cook of his neck. His hands run up and down my back, and his kisses the top of my head.
I love this family of mine.
Nineteen
Dropping my purse on the counter, I reach for a mug and fill it with coffee. The one cup I had this morning at our apartment in New York is not nearly enough to stave off the impending caffeine withdrawal headache tapping the base of my skull.
"Welcome home," Maggie says, looking up from the large griddle. Several perfectly golden disks dot the black surface. "Did you have breakfast yet? Thomas requested pancakes this morning, and I have plenty."
The faint scent of vanilla competes with the smell of bacon. My stomach growls my answer. I didn't think I was hungry until I walked through the door. "I'm in for some pancakes."
Thomas slips onto one of the high stools along the breakfast bar, and inhales deeply. Maggie chuckles. "Not long, Thomas. In the meantime, get plates and silverware out for you, Jake, Kylie and Alex."
Vindication: Of Demons & Stones: Tri-Stone Trilogy, Book Three Page 10
