‘Nick.’ Her hand reached out to touch him, capturing his forearm in her fingers, holding it as she spoke, trying somehow to recapture the closeness that had so recently been there. ‘I don’t regret last night for a moment. Last night wasn’t something that happened just because I was feeling tired or emotional or because I’d had a few too many to drink. Last night was because of how I feel about you, how I’ve always felt about you.’
‘No!’ Shaking his head, he shrugged off her hand, his voice when it came harsh and unfamiliar an utter contrast to the man that had softly held her only a matter of hours ago. ‘Eden, we’re friends, that’s all we’ve ever been. Last night was just….’
‘Just what, Nick?’ Eden croaked, eyes wide in her pale face, reeling from the mental slap to her cheek he had just delivered.
‘One of those things,’ Nick answered, his voice ominously flip. ‘Two friends getting a bit emotional, perhaps.’
‘Nick.’ Eden was struggling to keep her voice down, struggling to fathom the change in him, refusing to believe that things could change so quickly, that he could use her so readily, could toss her aside so easily. ‘Last night you said that you’d always wanted me, last night—’
‘I didn’t.’
His denial floored her, his absolute refusal to admit the truth so incredible that all she could do was stare at him, her mouth open but no words coming out, shame burning onto shame, a dark blush of humiliation spreading over her cheeks.
‘I didn’t say that, Eden,’ Nick insisted, as he looked her straight in the eye and swore that black was white. ‘You’re getting things mixed up.’
‘Oh, I’m mixed up all right!’ Eden retorted. ‘I’d have to be, to be stupid enough to get into bed with you.’
‘Eden.’ His voice was incredibly calm, as if it were she, Eden, who was the one with the problem, his barefaced lies, his outright denial, his complete about-turn clearly par for the course for Nick. ‘I’m sorry you’re feeling this way—‘
‘No, you’re not,’ Eden interrupted, her face incredulous as she stared back at this stranger. ‘And don’t presume to know how I’m feeling, Nick, don’t presume a single thing about me ever again.’ Draping the sheet around her, Eden stood, and if awkwardness about her breasts had taught her one thing, it was how to pull on a bra and knickers while still covered, those awkward adolescent days at the swimming pool finally coming in useful for something! ‘Is that the line you use to get women into bed, then? Make out it actually means something to you, tell whoever it is that you’re shagging that night that you’ve always felt something for them?’
Her words hit their mark. Nick winced at her unfamiliar crudeness, but he didn’t back down and for Eden it was the final straw. She hated herself for it, hated the shame that had assailed her, last night sullied now for ever. But if she hated how she felt, at that moment she hated Nick more, and it gave her the strength to continue, to tell him in harsh, whispered tones exactly what she thought of him. Eden was grateful for that moment, glad of a chance to vent her anger, to say what was on her mind before remorse took over, knowing that the next time she faced him it would be she, Eden, looking away.
‘You’re a user, Nick Watson. I don’t know what your problem is, whether you’re trying to sleep your way out of your own grief or, worse, you’ve just forgotten how to care any more.
‘Well, don’t worry, Nick, I won’t be hanging around and making a nuisance of myself. I won’t be coming up to you in pubs and trying to buy you a drink, like Tanya was, in some pathetic hope that we can take a trip down memory lane…’
A muscle was leaping in his cheek, but apart from that he was completely motionless.
Emotionless
‘You used her, Nick, the same way you used me,’ Eden said, confused, bewildered but completely in control. Not bothering to ask permission, she picked up a comb from his dresser and ran it through her hair before slipping on her sandals. ‘Now, can you, please, take me home?’
Because they were nice, decent people who didn’t deserve their Christmas to be spoilt, Eden managed a friendly smile and a few polite exchanges as she said farewell to Nick’s family, but tears were dangerously close as she walked out to Nick’s car. Despite her casual wave as Nick pulled out of the driveway, her whole body was trembling inside, scarcely able to fathom that things could have gone so horribly wrong, that she could have misread him so badly, that the man she loved could treat her like this.
Had loved.
A tiny spark of hope flared inside her as Eden mentally corrected herself—a woman’s survival instinct kicking in, the knowledge that she would get through this, that she would come out the other side. And that knowledge gave her the strength to turn to him as he pulled up outside her house, to look him in the eye and keep her voice even as she spoke.
‘I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone what happened last night.’
‘What do you take me for?” Nick responded, clearly irritated by her request. ‘You know I wouldn’t say anything.’
‘But I don’t know you,’ Eden pointed out, as his eyes refused to meet hers and he turned his face away. ‘I’m looking at you, Nick, and I don’t even know you, but I’m telling you this much—I’ll smile and I’ll be friendly and I’ll be completely professional, but don’t be fooled, don’t for one minute think that I’ve forgotten what a sleaze you really are. Don’t ever, even for a second, think that I’ve forgiven you.’
Opening the car door, she swung her legs to the pavement outside and stood up, frowning as Nick called her back.
‘What?’
‘You forgot these.’ He still wasn’t even looking at her, just staring fixedly at the street ahead as one hand held up the bag with the presents she had acquired yesterday. But in a small defiant gesture Eden declined, instead slamming the car door closed and heading up the drive. She pulled out her keys and, despite her shaking hands, slid the key easily into the lock, opening the door and stepping inside. With the door safely closed behind her she stared at the blinking light on the answering machine, knowing it would be her mother checking that everything was OK, that Eden had heeded the warnings and kept her head.
And only when she heard the purr of his engine, only when she knew that he was really gone, that Nick wasn’t coming back, did she let out a strangled sob and finally give in to the tears that had been there since he’d walked back into the bedroom that morning, since he’d offered her a coffee as he’d cruelly ripped out her heart.
CHAPTER TEN
‘CAN you believe that all that time he was working at the post office?’
A delighted Becky tucked in the end of the sheet at the bottom of Rory’s bed as Eden did the same on the other side, sliding it up under Rory, as he held onto his monkey bar, and tucking it in at the top.
‘There was me thinking…well, you know, and all the time he was saving up to buy me these!’ Fondly she touched the diamond studs in her ears and Eden gave her patient a small eye roll, smiling as Rory gave one back.
For the most part, this type of conversation took place away from the bedside, but Rory, beyond bored with the hospital routine, delighted in being included in the nurses’ more private conversations and loved being made to feel special.
‘Aren’t they lovely?’ Becky said for the hundredth time. ‘You should have seen my face when I opened the parcel.’
‘They’re gorgeous,’ Eden agreed. ‘Aren’t they, Rory?’
‘Yep.’ Rory nodded, winking at Eden as he spoke. ‘You look great in them, Becky!’
The bed changed, Eden and Becky carefully tucked in Rory’s beloved blanket. Since Christmas morning, when he’d received his gift, Rory had been a different boy indeed, the despondent gloom that had shrouded him gone now. He felt safe in the knowledge that he hadn’t been forgotten by his peers.
‘Are you two both on night shift, then?’ Rory checked, and Eden nodded.
‘You’ve got us for the next four nights, so you’d better behave.’
&nbs
p; ‘How come you have to do so many nights, Eden?’ Rory asked innocently, completely unaware of the battles that went on behind making up the nursing roster.
‘It’s just the way my shifts fall,’ Eden said casually, smiling as Donna came over to say she was leaving. Her jacket was on and her bag firmly on her shoulder, ready to call it a night after a long late shift.
‘But that will mean you have to work Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve,’ Rory said loudly, completely unabashed by Donna’s presence, blissfully unaware of the politics of hierarchy. ‘It doesn’t seem fair that you have to work both.’
‘It’s no big deal,’ Eden said, smothering a smile as Becky gave a delighted grin behind Donna’s stern face, both women scarcely able to believe their luck that Donna had heard what Rory had just pointed out!
‘Could I have a quick word, you two?’
They headed off to the nurses’ station, no doubt, Eden thought, to be told that if they got a quiet few moment there were several hundred cupboards that needed cleaning or a mountain of stores to be put away. But Donna had other things on her mind. ‘I’ve just had a call from Emergency and we’re getting a new admission—a five-year-old presenting with her first seizure. She’s mildly febrile but, given her age, the emergency staff don’t think it was a febrile convulsion. I’ve allocated ISO 2 for her until we know what’s going on.’
Eden jotted the information down on her pad, slightly surprised at the seriousness of Donna’s voice and the fact she had pulled both staff members away to tell them about the new admission. PUO, or pyrexia of unknown origin, and a first seizure were both fairly routine, but as Donna continued talking Eden’s pen stilled over the paper and, unlike Becky, realised in an instant why they had been called aside.
‘Her name’s Harriet Mason.’
‘Martin?’ Becky asked.
‘No, Mason,’ Donna reiterated. ‘You both need to know that this patient is Nick Watson’s niece—he’s down in Emergency with her now, but even though it’s Dr Watson on take tonight, young Harriet has been admitted under the care of Dr Timms so if there are any problems in the night, instead of consulting one of Nick’s team, you’ll need to ask switch to page one of Dr Timms’s team, though naturally, if it’s an emergency or she starts seizing, it will just have to be the doctor nearest who treats her. Hopefully it won’t be Nick.’
‘Hopefully,’ Eden agreed. ‘How long till Emergency sends her up?’
‘I told them to bring her when they’re ready. I shouldn’t think they’ll be very long.’
With that in mind Eden and Becky headed off to set up the room, turning back the bed and putting out a gown and kidney dish in case Harriet felt sick, checking that the oxygen and suction were all connected and in proper working order.
‘Do you want to take her?’ Eden offered rather too lightly, colouring up a touch as Becky gave her a rather quizzical frown, no doubt puzzled. On night shift it was generally a case of whoever saw the patient first was the one who admitted them, but the last thing Eden needed right now was a close encounter with Nick. It had been hard enough maintaining an air of professionalism the few times their paths had crossed over the last few nights, but the fact his niece was a patient and that Eden knew Lily could only make things difficult.
‘Sure,’ Becky replied. ‘Eden, is everything OK?’
‘Everything’s fine.’ Eden replied stiffly, needlessly rechecking the wall-mounted suction again.
‘You never really said how your Christmas went,’ Becky pushed. ‘What it was like at Nick’s.’
‘I had a great day,’ Eden answered, forcing a smile and turning around. ‘Ben did, too. Nick’s family made us both very welcome.’
The sound of the ward doors opening thankfully ended the difficult conversation, and Eden peered out of the window. ‘Your patient’s here, Becky. I’ll go and do the meds and then I’ll give Rochelle a hand with the obs and settling.’
‘Save some work for me,’ Becky called, waving to the shadowy figure of the porter pushing the gurney along the darkened ward as Eden dashed off and set about her work. But as much as she feigned indifference, it wasn’t only Nick’s presence that was upsetting her. The fact Harriet had been taken sick so suddenly had a knot of anxiety tightening in Eden’s stomach, coupled with a surge of sympathy for Lily, who had already been through so much this past year, and a genuine hope that Harriet would be OK.
‘How’s Harriet?’ Eden asked a short while later when Becky came to help with the night round, catching up at the nurses’ station and checking the IV antibiotics.
‘Good,’ Becky replied. ‘She’s on two-hourly neuro obs, her temp’s 37.8 and she seems comfortable with it. Her mum’s staying the night.’ Becky shot her a sideways look. ‘She was asking after you. She said you had a great time on Christmas night!’ Swallowing hard, Eden deliberately ignored Becky’s not too subtle push for information but, not remotely fazed, Becky carried on fishing. ‘I thought you were only there for a few hours at lunchtime.’
‘I stayed for supper,’ Eden said lightly, tapping a bubble out of a syringe.
‘And breakfast, too?’ Becky giggled but it faded midway, seeing the anguished look on Eden’s face. ‘Oh, Eden, I didn’t mean to…’ Helplessly she flailed, ‘Eden, I had no idea—’
‘Leave it, Becky,’ Eden’s voice came out more sharply than she’d intended, but a ride on the rumour mill was the very last thing she needed right now. ‘I mean it, if you breathe a single word to anyone…’
‘As if I would,’ Becky soothed, concern growing in her kind eyes as Eden rapidly blinked back a threatening tear. ‘Eden, what on earth happened?’
‘I can’t talk about it.’ Eden shook her head, taking a tissue from a box and blowing her nose, but Becky was insistent.
‘But it might help,’ Becky said. ‘Look at all my troubles with Hamish. You were there for me, Eden, and you know I’d never breathe a word. And who knows? It might even help.’
‘It won’t,’ Eden said firmly.
‘It might.’ Instinctively Becky’s hand reached for her earlobe, fingering one of the precious jewels Hamish had bought for her, and Eden managed a weak smile.
‘Believe me, Becky, there’s going to be no little box with a bow for me. I know you’d never breathe a word, I trust you implicitly. It’s just that I insisted that Nick not say anything to anyone. It’s only fair that I do the same.’
‘Fair enough.’ Becky nodded ‘But if you change your mind, you know that I’m here for you.’
‘Thanks,’ Eden sniffed. ‘Now, let’s get on with checking these drugs or we’re never going to finish. Poor Rochelle’s done practically all the obs herself.’
‘She’s good, though,’ Becky observed. ‘Considering she’s just a grad nurse, she’s incredibly efficient.’
‘How’s Harriet?’
The sound of Nick’s voice behind them had both women jumping, and never had Eden been more grateful that the conversation had shifted to Rochelle. The last thing she needed was for Nick to see how upset she was. Thankfully, Becky had it all under control, turning her smiling face to Nick and somehow managing to greet him in the same easygoing way that she always did.
‘She’s doing great, Nick,’ Becky answered, as Eden busied herself with the IV drugs, laying out the open prescription charts and placing the kidney dishes with the checked medication on top, then attaching a little sticky note to each kidney dish with the schedule time clearly visible. Impeccably organised, especially where medication was concerned, Eden was glad of the distraction, glad to be able to busy herself as Nick and Beck chatted on. ‘Her obs are still stable, just a little bit febrile—37.8 I’ve given her a drink of milk and she’s settling to sleep.’
‘And Lily?’ Nick checked. ‘My sister?’
‘Like any other mum, worried out of her mind and trying not to show it. Harriet’s in ISO 2.’
‘Thanks.’ Nick nodded, but didn’t head off. Instead, he tapped Harriet’s details into the computer and checked
to see whether or not any labs were back on her. ‘You know that she’s due for an EEG in the morning?’
‘All booked.’ Becky smiled. ‘Any blood results back yet?’
‘Just her U and Es,’ Nick replied, ‘which are all normal. Emergency’s really busy, so I think Harriet’s bloods will take a while to come back. Can you let me know when they do?’
‘Sure,’ Becky answered, looking up as Eden came over.
‘Ready to give the IVs?’ Eden asked, then, smiling casually, she greeted Nick. ‘Hi, Nick, I’m sorry to hear about your niece.’
‘Thanks.’ Nick forced a smile of his own. ‘I’d better go and say goodnight to her and then I’ll be in my office tonight. Call me if there’s any change.’
‘We will,’ Eden assured him.
As he marched off Becky let out a tiny gasp of admiration. ‘Wow, you’re good. Talk about laid-back. How on earth did you manage it?’
Eden gave a mirthless laugh. ‘A full year of practice, Becky.’
The round took for ever and by the time the charts were all filled in and ruled off for the next day, it was already half past two.
‘Do you want to go for your supper break?’ Becky offered Eden as a tired-looking Rochelle returned from hers.
‘You go,’ Eden answered. ‘Cot three’s due to wake any moment. I’m just warming a bottle for him in anticipation.’
Becky stood up gratefully, smothering a yawn as she did so. ‘I won’t say no. I’m exhausted. I’ll just stretch out in the staffroom. If I’m not back on time, come and call me.’
‘Will do,’ Eden answered, after all her years in nursing still baffled how anyone could manage to sleep on their break and come back to work afterwards saying that they felt better for it. Eden had tried it once and had sworn never to do it again, preferring to use her break to flick through a few magazines or read a book. ‘Is there anything that needs doing while you’re gone?’
Becky shook her head. ‘I’m up to date. Just some oxygen sats to be done on cot one at three a.m.’ Her face suddenly dropped. ‘Oh, and Harriet will need another set of neuro obs at three. I can stay if you like and go after—’
Christmas on the Children's Ward Page 12
