“No, I just hate getting lost in them. It’s so bloody easy to lose hours in there just backtracking.”
Gerry silently agreed as I took point and entered the cave. We didn’t see anything for a long time, but then the black veil lifted and we were in the first section of the cave where the druids stood waiting.
“Glad to see you finally got back your druidic spirit!” Berta remarked at my robes.
“Yeah, well, it seemed appropriate. So which way are we going?” I asked as I looked at the two paths ahead of us.
“We were just discussing that,” Joile said before any of the others could open their mouths, “and I think Berta and I should take the left, while Dillop goes with you two.”
Dillop jumped in with a look of unmistakable disagreement, “And I think we should all choose one path and stick together, we’ll cover less ground, but we won’t all die.”
“What do you think?” Berta asked before the brothers could start bickering again.
I turned to Gerry who shrugged, “I honestly don’t mind,” he said loud enough for everyone to hear then leant in, “I think if you choose to split up the other party is going to die.”
“You mean uptight bald guy who wants to throw his younger brother to a couple of strangers while he goes and snogs little miss ‘OMG, I love your robe’!” I whispered back.
We shared a laugh before I decided, “Yeah, I think we should split up. We’ll cover more ground, and if we get lost we just come back here.”
Joile agreed with a sneaky smile to Berta, “Very good. Let’s get on with it then.”
It took Dillop a few seconds of pleading eyes with his brother before he finally resigned to joining Gerry and I’s little party, then it was down the right tunnel and on our way to see the Skeleton King.
Armelia: Chapter 11
“So why did you and your brother join the MoDA?” Gerry asked as we ducked through a particularly low cave and started leading the way down an incline.
Dillop laughed weakly, “That’s really two separate questions. He’ll say he joined so he could further explore the magical world around us and get in tune with the cosmos, but I think he did it so that he could lay with all of the druidic women.”
I almost slipped on a rock, but caught myself before anyone noticed, “What about you?”
We started going almost straight down, but the boy didn’t seem in the least bit concerned, “My father beat me, and the only one who stood up for me was my brother. If he’d have left without me I was sure I’d have had a ‘hunting accident’.” he said flatly.
I skipped past the uncomfortable topic of child abuse and the themes thereof, and decided to be the annoying child of the group, “How far are we to the bottom?”
“I don’t know,” Gerry said from the seemingly encroaching blackness below me, “why don’t you use a spell or something?”
I laughed heartily and almost fell again, it was starting to get really dangerous, “I only know the one spell, and believe me when I say you don’t want me using it in here.”
Gerry sighed, “Well all I’ve got in terms of illumination is fire magic, and I don’t know how well that’ll go down in here with us all bunch up. One false move and I’ve turned this thing into a chimney laced with kerosene.”
“So we could end up climbing down for a full hour just to get stuck?”
“Pretty much. Maybe we should go back, see if we can find the others.”
I was about to agree with him when I got an idea, it was a bit exploitative, but I really wasn’t in a spelunking mood. “I’ve got an idea. Hold on.”
Equipped Iron Dagger.
Dropped Iron Dagger.
Equipped Armelia’s Long Bow.
I watched as the glowing blade fell, a design choice meant to help us find loot that I was using to determine whether or not we were wasting our time.
Then it hit the ground, maybe three seconds after I dropped it, but instead of making the tell-tale ting or crash sound it made the sound of slicing followed by squelching and blood splatter.
I wasted another few seconds before making up my mind, “Drop down.”
“What? Are you mental?”
“Just drop down and get out of the way Gerry.”
I heard him sigh, followed by some silence, then he let go of the rocks and fell, another squelching sound reverberating up the tunnel.
“Clear!” he shouted up.
Without a second’s hesitation I dropped down and rolled off the soft, but somewhat rigid pile before noticing the torch on the wall and grabbed it.
Equipped Torch: Weight: 2.
“Light this for me, would you?” I asked the darkness.
A hand wrapped around the end of the torch and then burst into a gorgeous ball of light.
Grand Gerry the Good has lit your torch.
“Holy-!” Gerry exclaimed at the sight of the two mangled corpses of Joile and Berta in front of us, my dagger embedded deep in Berta’s chest cavity.
I cleared my throat and gave Gerry a significant look.
He gave a defeated sigh and let his head loll forward, “Ghost…”
“Ha! I knew I’d get it out of you. Holy Trinity baby!” I shouted happily as I started to dance on the spot.
“Perhaps you should refrain from the laughing?” Gerry said with a nod toward Dillop, who was just coming down the hole.
“Oh Gods… What happened!?”
“I’m thinking the tunnel they took must’ve led to ours and they fell down. I don’t see any other way here except…” I trailed off as I turned around to look down the almost hall-like tunnel with concern.
“You thinking what I’m thinking?” Gerry said, following my gaze.
I got a stupid grin on my face, “I think I am B- Ow!” I yelped after Gerry punched me lightly in the arm.
“Don’t, I’m serious. Normally we don’t see these types of mechanics until much later, they try to keep it at least mildly family friendly for the first few quests.”
I nodded, “Yeah… Maybe it’s because you’re here?”
“That’s what I was thinking. Probably wouldn’t have lost half the party if you didn’t have me here.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t like them anyway. Besides, we didn’t lose them, they’re right there.” I said after pointing the torch at the bodies then back in front of us.
“Oh right, because that makes the fact that they were probably dragged over by undead skeletons completely okay.”
“Don’t be bitchy.” I said as I touched my torch to the one that was originally opposite mine.
“How can I not be? This was meant to be a nice cruisey dungeon crawl, now we’re talking about perma-death of quest characters? I’m telling you Armelia, this is not going to be as easy as we thought.”
“Is there nothing you can do for them?” a weepy voice said from behind us.
Gerry turned around shaking his head, “I’m afraid not.” he said in a kind voice, “But I can bless and burn their bodies if you’d like?”
“Oh for Gods’ sake, do we really have time for this?”
I know I seem annoying, outright rude even, but the fact was that I could predict exactly how the quest would go; find the Skeleton King and some of his cronies, all looking relatively the same with the exception of a crown, probably a semi high level, but not over twenty, then we’d get the sceptre and leave.
Boy oh boy was I naïve.
“It’s something nice for Dillop, and I’m sure he’ll remember it later.” He was clearly reading the obvious boredom I was suffering from, but he did his best not to address it. “If you want, you can go scout ahead while I do this, I’m sure he won’t notice.”
I curtsied, “Why thank you good sir.” I said sarcastically before turning away and walking down the tunnel and muttering about how stupid Gerry was for staying.
I lit the torches as I went, the tunnel being at least a mile long, probably made to lull us into a bored stupor before hitting us with the big surprising fir
st boss. It wasn’t until I got to about a hundred feet out that I started to make out an exit for the tunnel, a massive cavern that’s size was only obvious from the few bits of light that trickled out onto the floor.
I stood at the opening, staring into the vast nothing, a sinking feeling forcing me to stay right where I was. Then I saw something on the ground in front of me, a small hole surrounded by archaic writing that I was sure not even the most learned scholar could fully understand.
Without thinking I took a knee, looked at the bottom of my torch, then back at the hole, and shrugged before putting it in.
Bad decision.
Torch removed.
I watched the cavern start to light around the top, five hundred feet up, torches lit in mirrored-synchronicity before a huge dome lit up with an unnatural red.
Once I stopped looking at the hypnotising light I looked down and saw what I had awoken, an army of two hundred unarmed, blue-eyed skeletons, and they were all staring at me.
But that wasn’t the worst part.
No, the worst part was the three hundred foot skeletal beast rising to its feet, drowning the cavern in ancient dust from its creaking and cracking joints as it turned to face me with the others, a giant sword dangling from its mighty hand.
The Skeleton Army has been awoken.
200x Level 35 Skeletons, HP: 1500/1500.
Level 90 Skeleton King, HP: 75000/75000.
“Hey, Gerry!? I think I’m gonna be needing one of them blessings!”
Armelia: Chapter 12
Skeleton discovered.
Journal entry made.
Skeleton King discovered.
Journal entry made.
Progress made in mission: The Sceptre of Julkaboobu.
Objective completed: Explore Dead Man’s Rest with the Druids and Find the Skeleton King.
Objective added: Defeat the Skeleton King.
“What in the Hel did you do!?” Gerry yelled as he screeched to a halt beside me.
“I just put the torch in the ground, I figured it would light up the cavern.” I said as I drew an arrow in my bow.
“Well you did that! 75,000!? What are we meant to do against that? And where’s the sceptre!?”
I looked up at the Skeleton King’s crown, “Oh… Oh that’s not good…”
“What are yo- Oh my Gods! It’s built into its crown!? Well that’s just fan-bloody-tastic!”
“Quit your belly-aching.” I snapped, my mind going into full battle mode. “First things first we start taking on the skeletons, find out if the King has friendly fire. Then we focus on the big fellow. Gerry, you use whatever berserk spells you’ve got on the skeletons, see if we can get some numbers on our side, Dillop, you-”
“Dill-oooooop Grat!” the young man screamed as he ran headlong into battle with a fistful of fire and my dagger.
I looked at Gerry and shrugged, “Works for me. Arrrrr-melia Fireheart!”
“Graaa-aaand Gerry!”
Suddenly we were in the thick of it, me loosing arrows into descending horde, Gerry casting a mix of AOE fire attacks, berserk spells and bloody Oak Flesh, while Dillop went absolutely mental.
It was harrowing.
I’d watch as a skeleton was about to descend upon me, but that would be the exact moment that Gerry blasted it into the air with a conjured tree. It was brutal, visceral, and a whole lotta fun. I was finally against insurmountable odds and I really had to rely on my team, and had to avoid getting hit at all costs, especially from the King.
“Duck!” Gerry called out after mumbling an incantation.
I followed his command, dropping to the floor and watching as fiery vines shot out across the cavern, entangling and burning the souls that held the bones together out of the skeletons.
“Gerry!” I cried as I saw the Skeleton King going for a swing.
He barely rolled out of the way as the ancient sword cracked down, killing at least a dozen of the King’s servants, but he wasn’t fast enough to dodge the flat side of the blade as it dragged across the field. Luckily his Oak Flesh took the brunt of the blow, but his health still read 12500/20000 by the time he hit the wall and fell to the ground, while the King’s health was still at 59750/75000, and there were still a boatload of skeletons left.
Dillop, on the other hand, had no HP indicator, and was simply whaling on anything in his path, torching bones and popping off jaws with his dagger.
“You alright Gerry?” I asked as I loosed an arrow at a skeleton with next to no health, separating its head clean from its body.
“I’ll be fine,” he said as he got back up to his feet and burned a line of screaming skeletons, “I think we’re almost done on the skeleton front, how are you holding up?”
I rolled backwards as a skeleton chased me around the cavern, my arrows doing next to zero damage against it, “Just fine. A little help?” I pleaded after I hit a wall.
The creature leapt at me, and I was sure I was done for, but then it got hit with a glowing ball of red energy and started going after its friends, of which there were less than a dozen left.
“Burn the rest up! I’m going to start laying hits on the King!” I shouted before starting to empty my quiver at the gargantuan monstrosity, it being far too interested in the tiny Dillop who was slashing at his ankles to give a damn.
Gerry nodded and started spewing fire from his palms at the skeletons as they ripped each other apart.
By the time I ran out of arrows Dillop and I had gotten the King down to 29865/75000, which I was very proud of, but it meant that the thing had started going into a rage state, swinging blindly at the ground in the hope that it’d knock myself or Dillop straight to Hel.
“Gerry! We’re in a bit of a pinch here!”
Before I’d gotten out the last word Gerry shot a tree up through each of the King’s feet, locking it in place. I watched in amazement as he drove a heavy trunk from the cavern wall behind the skeleton and into its back, causing it to fall forward onto its hands and knees and dropping its sword. Suddenly the beast’s hands were also bound to the floor, leaving its only option to swing its head wildly at us.
Dillop and Gerry burned the massive skull between their crazily close dodging skills while I watched the HP slowly tick down. It’d take ages for the strategy to result in the thing’s death, but I only had a bow and Ky-Len’s heal.
That’s when I came up with an idea, “Keep him distracted!” I shouted over the roaring flames as I made a run for the skeletal arm.
Unequipped Armelia’s Long Bow.
The others didn’t respond, but I figured they’d heard me, and even if they didn’t I’m sure it was obvious that they make sure I wouldn’t get eaten. I reached the shoulder with relative ease, but climbing over the constantly moving and swaying neck was proving to be a right bitch, and the smooth skull was even worse.
Eventually though, I made it to the crown and started using it to hold myself up. Then I realised the flaw in my plan.
“I haven’t got my dagger!” I screamed as I held on for dear life.
“So what!? Just punch it!” Gerry yelled back.
“But I need to be bleeding!”
“Oh for-! Hold on!” In an act of complete insanity, he stopped burning the King’s face, allowing it to turn its head toward him without the distraction of pain, “Put your left hand up!”
I did as he said, and before I could ask what he was doing I felt horrendous pain electrify my entire arm.
Grand Gerry the Good cast Deadly Splinters.
Left arm critically wounded.
300 damage inflicted.
-50 bleeding damage per minute.
HP: 1100/1400.
I got past the initial wooziness and thanked Gerry with a nod before going to work on the skull. I must’ve messed it up a dozen times before the yellow glow appeared, emitting an involuntary sigh of relief from me before I pressed my hand to it.
Placed Ky-Len’s Heal.
Activated Ky-Len’s Heal.
&nb
sp; Full health restored.
All debuffs removed.
HP: 1400/1400.
I decided not to mess around on top of the bucking King, and rolled off onto the ground, “Get clear!” I shouted as I ran as fast as I could away from the blast zone.
The Skeleton King broke free of its bindings and roared at the sky as it clawed at its head, the three cacophonous booms the only thing that could silence the beast as its head split into two clean parts.
When we reached the tunnel we watched in stunned silence as the King fell to its knees, plumes of dirt and shattered bone flying high into the cavern as the once mighty tyrant crushed its subjects to dust. Once the dirt had settled it became clear that the King had become almost a statue of itself, stuck in the kneeling position for all time, or until someone else decided to scrap with the thing.
I fell backwards onto the floor and laughed, “Maybe no more quests for a little while, yeah?”
Gerry smiled and nodded before joining me in sitting, “And maybe next time we don’t go sticking things in places they don’t belong?”
I screwed up my face playfully, “Wow, you must be fun in the bedroom.”
Progress made in mission: The Sceptre of Julkaboobu.
Objective completed: Defeat the Skeleton King.
Objective added: Retrieve the Sceptre of Julkaboobu.
Armelia: Chapter 13
End of Conflict Report:
Grand Gerry the Good: 134x Level 35 Skeletons, 1x Level 90 Skeleton King.
Armelia Fireheart: 12x Level 35 Skeletons, 1x Level 90 Skeleton King.
Total experience awarded:
Grand Gerry the Good: Max Level Reached.
No Experience Points awarded.
Armelia Fireheart: +8500 XP.
Level 3 Completed!
Level Up!
Level 4 Completed!
Level Up!
Level 5 Completed!
Level Up!
Level 6 Completed!
Level Up!
Level 7 Completed!
Level Up!
Level 8 Progress: 1130/2250.
25 Skill Points awarded.
Loot awarded:
Legends of Tarthirious: The Complete Collection Page 6
