That was good in a way though, for one thing it meant I was clearheaded enough to remember that I hadn’t called my building’s owner to ask if Gerald could move in with me, mostly because I already knew the answer. I managed to force a smile for the duration of the call, the end result being an overly happy ‘Of course!’ followed by him telling me that he’d come by with some paperwork later in the day for Gerald to sign.
Then that was it again.
Eleven o’clock rolled around and we still hadn’t come up with a plan as to what we were going to do.
Midday and my landlord came by, Gerald and I both forcing ourselves to be all smiley faces until everything was signed and he was gone.
Half one rocked around and I finally decided I’d had enough, “That’s it,” I said loudly, shooting to my feet, “I’m done, you call pizza for delivery, I’ll crack the bottle. We’re gonna eat crappy food and watch crappy daytime telly, and you’re going to cheer the bloody Hell up, you understand?”
Gerald seemed unconvinced, but then I punched him in the arm and the smallest smile appeared on his face, “Alright, alright, I’ll call them.” he said as he slowly got to his feet, his voice still dragging along tiredly.
“If you can get the call done in the next thirty seconds I’ll give you a nosher.”
I’d never seen him move so quick in his life after that little remark.
A minute later and the call was done, but because I’m the greatest person in the world I went ahead and did it anyway, I’d hyped it up for myself anyway.
It was actually kind of funny, not five seconds after he’d finished did the door start knocking, leaving him to desperately pull up his pants on the couch while I tried to make sure I didn’t have anything on my face.
By sheer luck I didn’t despite my tendency to let just a bit roll down my chin, my signature really, and successfully got through the entire transaction without the delivery guy knowing what had happened.
After that we actually had a really good lunch even though I was waiting for the phone to ring pretty much the whole time, but after two drinks and thirty minutes, both Gerald and I came to the conclusion that it wasn’t quite getting rid of the memory of almost getting blown up and having someone shot in front of us.
“Tarthirious?” I asked as Gerald chucked the box of half-eaten pizza in the fridge.
He contemplated it a moment then shrugged and nodded, “Sounds good to me, mind if I use a rig?”
“Not at all, we live together, may as well share.”
There it was, the first time I actually felt something about me living with him, and the feeling was good.
Armelia: Chapter 17
It took me a second to get my bearings, the drink clearly having more effect in Tarthirious than it did beyond, but I knew I could handle it.
It’s funny actually, because in my lightly tipsy view of the world I successfully found what I couldn’t while sober, a hatch in the centre of the roof above us.
“Heh, Gerry,” I said quietly, pointing to the wooden door above me, “you reckon you could jump up there?”
Gerry came over, nearly veering right off course with an unsure expression on his face, “Maybe?” he said as he finally moved in front of me and looked straight up.
After that we spent a solid five minutes trying to jump up at it, thinking that if we could time our grabs with our jumps perfectly we’d be able to get it. We were wrong, and just looked like a pair of absolute nonces.
“I could… hmm…” Gerry trailed off, looking around desperately for something he could use to get up to the hatch, “I could spawn another shrubbery? Use that to climb up.”
“That could work.”
That did not work.
Neither did standing and jumping off it.
Nor using it to get onto my head.
Nor standing on my head and jumping off it.
My point is that we were very obviously not meant to be able to open it by jumping.
After yet another failed attempt to use my head as a springboard I looked down at the ground and started laughing, noticing the little button on the ground that had only become visible because of the shrubbery clipping with it.
Without saying anything to Gerry, I knelt down and pushed the small brown button and was instantly thrown back onto my arse as something shot up from the ground to the hatch.
Hidden Fort Bazaar Ladder activated.
“Woah…” Gerry said in wonderment as he beheld the massive thing that had suddenly appeared when he wasn’t looking, “How’d you do that?”
I stood up and dusted myself off with a shrug, “There was a little button on the ground near your bush. Heh, that’s a funny, ‘your bush’. Anyway, yeah, you reckon we should climb it?”
Gerry looked between me and the ladder a few times, “I… I guess we should? I don’t know, it doesn’t seem all that safe.”
“Pfft, when’s anything fun safe? Hm? Come on, I wanna kill me some necromancers.”
I was putting it on a bit, I’ll admit that, but only because I didn’t want to admit that the idea of going into a battle seemed a bit overwhelming.
After only a few seconds of putting it off, I started up the ladder and, when I reached the top, peeked inside the fort. The room above us appeared to be some kind of throne room, a good hundred feet long and some fifty feet wide. I did some more scouting around for safety’s sake before accepting it was empty and climbing into the barren room.
Progress made in mission: The Hidden Fort.
Objective completed: Infiltrate the Hidden Fort.
Objective added: Regroup with Vilor and Lyrias.
“Come up,” I whispered to the cautiously waiting Gerry still halfway up the ladder, “coast’s clear.”
Knowing that there were some kind of shadow creatures in the fort, I was well aware that they could technically be everywhere and anywhere and that the coast may have very well been 110 percent not clear. Still, didn’t seem wise to stand around in there on my own though.
Gerry took his sweet arse time to finally get up into the throne room, but once he was sure we weren’t going to be met with swift and certain death he became a lot braver.
We split up and searched the entire thing, looking for any sign of danger or surprise QTEs before we even considered looking for Vilor and Lyrias.
“Where do you think they are?” Gerry asked as we snuck our way toward the front door.
“My bet’s the courtyard, but I’ve been wrong before…” I said as I put my hand against the door and slowly pushed it open, waiting for an attack from the guards that didn’t come.
Luckily there wasn’t anyone waiting to kill us, unluckily there wasn’t anyone there waiting to help us.
“Looking for these?” an evil and familiar voice asked from behind us.
“Necromancers…” Gerry trailed off as we spun to face the five powerful mages standing around the throne.
It took me a second, but then I spotted what Pretius had been talking about, Vilor and Lyrias trapped in magic green rope, suspended in the air with their mouths missing.
“Good to see you at least brought someone else druid, would’ve been a shame to simply squash you like the insect that you are.”
“You think you can bargain with them?” Gerry asked, the slight crack in his voice indicating that he already knew my answer.
“Not even if I had the charisma of a dwarf trader, I think we’ll have to fight them.”
“Do you really believe we can take them? You saw what happened last time.”
“Yeah, when they had a bunch of their undead puppets to give us Hell, now though? It’s blade-on-blade.”
Gerry started chuckling, and when he bit his lip to try and stop himself it turned into childish snickering.
“What’s so funny?”
“‘Blade-on-Blade’. Sounds like a gay fantasy smut film.”
That hadn’t even occurred to me until he said it, but with it out there it was my turn to join in the imma
ture laughing.
I know, I know, ‘Fight some bloody necromancers already!’ What can I say though? Our emotions were still kind of wacky, and it seemed we had dipped into the giggly side of the seesaw of tears.
We’d have continued laughing too, maybe even discussed a few scenes, but it seemed that Pretius had grown tired of waiting for a response and drawn his curved and serrated sword, the others all following his example in unison.
The Elite Necromancers are attacking.
5x Level 18 Elite Necromancers, HP: 1750/1750.
Progress made in mission: The Hidden Fort.
Objective completed: Regroup with Vilor and Lyrias.
Objective added: Defeat the Elite Necromancers.
Equipped Sparky McStabby-Stab.
“Bring it.”
Armelia: Chapter 18
I was delighted to discover that my sword’s enchantments were apparently working perfectly, an arc of lightning shooting from my blade and hitting three of my opponents, which was swiftly followed by me teleporting to each of them and landing a single successful slice, but no luck for a crit.
At first I thought that I’d managed a pretty amazing first hit, but then I realised that Gerry was still charging over, a thick elven dagger in each hand, and I was on my own.
The last one in my line of attack came at me, and I only just managed to roll away to relative safety, hitting the throne and coming to stand in a defensive form.
Gerry had finally reached the line of necromancers, his daggers successfully blocking every single one of their brutal attacks, before slicing a circle on the floor around him and causing a quick and deadly blast of splinters to shoot from the circle into the angry necromancers that had him surrounded.
I wanted to dive in to the rescue, but my opponent hadn’t let his attention sway as I had, and before I knew what was happening he’d taken a slice at me, narrowly missing as I took a quick step sideways causing his blade to get wedged in the throne.
As much of a cheap move as it was, I started slicing wildly into the frustrated necromancer, sending blood and sparks everywhere, and more than a few heavy hits that netted me a few more singlehanded blade points, before he finally broke free.
The once powerful mage had been weakened though, and his sword hung low as he stared at me from under his hood, his HP reading a measly 230/1750 while I stood unscathed but tired.
We both knew that whoever made the first move was going to be the first hit, and he knew that he couldn’t afford that, and I figured he’d probably have some of that silver drake blood on his sword, meaning a whole lot of pain that I most definitely wouldn’t be given the time to recover from.
I was getting ready to finally bite the bullet, but the necromancer was apparently a lot quicker on the draw than I and charged with what little strength he had left. I didn’t even bother getting into a better stance, instead just pointing out my sword and letting his speed do all the work.
Critical Hit! popped up as my blade ran him through and I, being the merciful person I am, used my ability of teleportation to get behind him, drive my sword into his back and, despite the fact he was already well and truly dead, pulled it out and spun, chopping his head clean off in the process.
Having already done it once didn’t detract from the somewhat macabre joy I gained from watching the decapitated corpse slump to the floor in a sparky mess of blood and meat.
+1 Singlehanded Blade Skill.
Progress: 29/100.
+10 XP.
Progress: 1070/4000.
Having defeated the first of my foes I turned to help Gerry with his situation, but with a heavy sigh I discovered that he wasn’t exactly in need of help.
“Did you have to kill them all?” I asked with the whine of a seven-year-old.
Gerry shrugged, looking up at his completed artwork of bodies pinned to the roof with vines and wood, most of them with their throats cut and little flowers growing from the wound, “You seemed kinda busy. Besides, I left you one.” he said, pointing to Pretius who simply refused to stop groaning.
“You reckon you could get him down for me?”
Gerry turned his attention to me, then back to Pretius, then back to me again, “Sure thing, you may want to step out of the way though.”
Without giving me so much as a second of pause Gerry snapped his fingers and all of the greenery in the throne room disappeared, and without it the bodies fell in silence with dull thuds and unnerving squelches onto the hard floors, with the exception of Pretius who let out a quick yelp before hitting the floor and then proceeded to roll around groaning.
Giving him a few seconds to wallow in his pain, I strode over slowly to the defeated necromancer with a smile on my face, “It’s so kind of you to share Gerry.”
“Well I do do my best.” he said proudly as I squatted down beside Pretius and grabbed a handful of his hair.
“How’s the head?” I asked the seething necromancer, a split roughly the size of a falcon’s feather on his forehead spilling a considerable amount of blood over his face.
“Go to the deepest of the Hells,” he growled, “druid whore.”
I smiled falsely and stopped myself from hitting him, the fear being that a single smack across the cheek from me would result in an untimely demise, “That’s right, you went to Girit Mage’s College, you can always tell when you’ve met another fellow student.”
“Fellow student? Ha! You couldn’t even begin to fathom the level of magic I have!”
“True as that may be, you’re the one bleeding out on the floor right now, so I’m going to go ahead and assume that we’re at least even when magic’s taken out of the equation. Now, release Vilor and Lyrias.”
“Why should I?” Pretius scoffed, “I’m going to die regardless.”
“Yes, but the speed at which you do is up to you.”
The defeated necromancer stared me down for a while, like he was trying to kill me with just that, before finally giving up and waving his hands, Vilor and Lyrias falling safely to the ground as a result.
“Brilliant job,” I said after the two appeared to be alive enough for me not to worry, “now let’s see what we can do about getting a portal home.”
Pretius chuckled, stopping when the pain became too much, “What? What makes you think I can make a portal back to Tarthirious? I barely had enough energy within me to hold it open, let alone start one. The only one with anywhere near enough power to do something like that is the High Lord Faerie.”
When he was done I thought for a moment and then let out a sigh, “See, now you’ve just proven you’re useless to me.” I said before driving my blade into his chest.
As sick as it may be, I kind of enjoyed watching the life leave his eyes, the glowing green fading back to the pale blue that I’m sure they were before he became a necromancer.
Far as I was concerned he got what was coming to him, the use of my fellow mages making me more than a little squeamish, but mostly I felt like I’d actually done some good. Fighting the forces of evil, helping the forces of good, I was doing what every great story said made a hero, and I was straight up loving it.
End of Conflict Report:
Grand Gerry the Good: 3x Level 18 Elite Necromancers.
Armelia Fireheart: 2x Level 18 Elite Necromancers.
Total experience awarded:
Grand Gerry the Good: Max Level Reached.
No Experience Points awarded.
Armelia Fireheart: +1600 XP.
Progress: 2670/4000.
Progress made in mission: The Hidden Fort.
Objective completed: Defeat the Elite Necromancers.
Objective added: Find the High Lord Faerie.
Armelia: Chapter 19
Acquired Elite Necromancer’s Dao: Weight: 7.5(-7.5), Damage: 60, Durability: 92/100, Enchantment: Necrosis (+20 Poison Damage).
I twirled the gorgeous blade a few times before stuffing it in my knapsack with the other one I’d grabbed up. They were singlehanded weapons, w
hich was cool, but I figured it’d be best for me to get to at least level 25 before messing with dual wielding, and only because I’d just started to get the hang of handling one.
“You two okay?” I asked as I turned to face Vilor and Lyrias who were anxiously looking each other over.
“I believe so, yes.” Vilor said before smiling at me, “Thank you.”
“Not any trouble at all. Do you think you could handle a fight?”
Lyrias gave me a confused look, “What do you mean? The necromancers here have been defeated.”
“True, but we’ve still have this ‘High Lord Faerie’ to deal with, and he sounds like he’s not going to be exactly willing to let us go.”
Vilor gave a pained sigh and nodded, “She’s right Lyrias, I’m afraid the only way we’re going to leave this dark place is by force.” he said tiredly, “We’re ready to go to battle when you are.”
“Can we stop for a sec?”
Kylia: Chapter 10
“Pardon?” I asked, spinning in my chair to face Gerald.
“Can we just pause for a little bit?” he asked almost embarrassedly without looking at me.
I gave him a confused look as I took off my headphones and started the process of logging off, “Um… yeah, sure. How come?”
He shrugged, still not making any eye contact with me, “I don’t know, I just… I’m not really feeling it, you know? I figured I’d jump in and we’d start some awesome quest and really get into it and kinda forget about what happened but…”
“Yeah…” I trailed off as I stood up, “I know what you mean, distraction’s just not quite distracting enough, yeah?”
Gerald nodded and sighed woefully, “I’m really sorry.”
“Don’t be! Seriously, if I’m being perfectly honest I was kinda feeling the same way. Maybe we should go out? Do something else and see if that works out?”
We stepped out of the Rig Room, both of us shifting our glasses and rubbing our eyes, “Sounds good, you reckon the shops’ll still be open?”
Legends of Tarthirious: The Complete Collection Page 38
