Which was also Gabe’s deepest desire.
“So how is your daed doing, Gabe?” Moriah asked.
“His recovery is slow, but he’s going to be okay. I still think he should see a doctor, but he won’t listen to me.”
“Recovery?” Emma asked.
“Didn’t Moriah tell you? He burned his hand on the forge yesterday. She took great care of him.”
“Rachel Detweiler was there too,” Moriah interjected. “And we didn’t do much, just bandaged his hand. Then we poured tea for him and made some apple brown betty. That’s his favorite dessert.”
“Good thing she was there. Daed can be stubborn, and I don’t do well with medical stuff. I faint at the sight of blood.”
She turned to him, surprise registering on her face. “You do not. I know this for a fact.”
He looked at her. “How?”
“First grade. I cut my finger on one of those sharp rocks in the school yard. You took a handkerchief out of your pocket and wrapped it around my finger to stop the bleeding while Levi ran and got the teacher.”
“I didn’t know about this,” Emma said. “Dear me, I hope it was clean.”
“Don’t worry, Mami, it was.” She directed her attention back to Gabe. “You didn’t pass out then, and I doubt you’d pass out now.”
“I’m surprised you remembered that,” he said. He had forgotten all about the incident.
“How could I forget? The teacher didn’t have any bandages, so I had to spend the rest of the day with a huge white finger. You must have wrapped that thing around it about five times.” She laughed. “Even then you were a nice guy.”
Gabe smiled. She’d never complimented him before, not in any meaningful way. To hear her words and to see her laugh were like a warm balm on his heart.
“I think I’ll take the rest of the cake out to the men.” Emma rose from her chair. “Those four have the biggest appetites I’ve ever seen. Gabriel, can I get you anything else?”
“Nee,” he said. “I’m fine. The cake is delicious, Frau Byler.”
“Danki, Gabriel. I’m glad you’re enjoying it. Moriah, I’m going to Mary’s fabric store after I give this to your father and brothers. Do you need anything?”
“Nee. I was just there the other day.”
After Emma left, Gabe looked at Moriah, who had grown serious again. She picked at her cake, lifting a bit of frosting on the tine of her fork. “You’re not hungry?” he asked.
“Not too much.”
“Was that Rebekkah Fisher I saw leaving a little while ago?”
Moriah nodded.
A tiny thread of panic wound through him. “Did she say everything was okay?”
She looked up at him. “Ya. The baby is fine. Rebekkah wants me to get more rest.”
Gabe shoved a bite of the cake in his mouth. “Sounds like good advice,” he said after he swallowed.
“I get plenty of sleep.”
“I don’t think so.”
Her head popped up, and from the surprised expression on her face, he regretted being so blunt. But he couldn’t figure out why she wasn’t telling the truth. “Moriah, anyone can see you’re tired.”
She set her fork down and looked at him squarely, a spark of irritation in her eyes. “What about you, Gabriel? How are you sleeping at night?”
Her question rendered him speechless for a moment. He hadn’t expected her to be so straightforward in return. “Not so well. Which is why I understand, Moriah.”
“You understand?” Her eyes grew moist, and her voice shook. “You understand what’s it’s like to lose your husband, not once, but twice? To know that he’ll never be here to share in the birth of his child?”
His chest tightened. “You know I don’t. But I loved him too, Moriah. He could make me so angry sometimes, especially when he . . . when he left. But that doesn’t mean I don’t wish almost every minute of the day that he was back. That I don’t live with regrets. That I don’t want more than anything to do things over. A lot of things.” He closed his eyes, blocking his own tears. He’d never verbalized the thoughts that had jumbled through his mind on so many sleepless nights since Levi’s death.
“Me too,” she said, reaching for his hand. Tears dripped down her face. “I can’t help but wonder why God took him away from me.” She looked at him. “From us.”
“I’ve asked that question so many times.” Her touch eased the pain in his heart. “We can’t understand God’s ways. We can only trust that His plans are for gut.”
“I don’t know how any gut can come from this.” She withdrew her hand from him and stood, then picked up their plates and put them next to the sink. He could see her wiping her tears with the back of her hands, and when she turned around, her eyes were dry. “Danki for coming by, Gabriel.”
Dismissed. But he wasn’t about to leave so easily. He walked over to her. “Don’t push me away, Moriah. Let me help you.”
“I don’t need your help.” She looked up at him. “If you’re worried about not being able to see the baby, you don’t have to be. You and John will always have a place in my child’s life.”
“I’m glad to know that, but that’s not why I’m here. Moriah, I would be here even if there was no baby. I’m here because I want to be. I’m here because I care.”
“But why?” Her lower lip started to tremble. “Why do you care?”
“Because I—”
A knock sounded on the front door. Inwardly he groaned. He had been about to reveal his heart, to tell her why he cared so much. Now she was moving away from him, and he no longer had the chance.
He followed her as she went to the front door and answered it. “Hello,” she said to the visitor as he came up behind her.
His eyes grew wide with shock as he saw the woman standing on the Bylers’ front porch. Taylor Johnston. Levi’s lover.
Chapter 14
Joseph, I promise you, there is something going on between the two of them.”
Tobias stuffed the last bite of apple cake in his mouth and tried not to eavesdrop on his parents. It was difficult not to, as his mother wasn’t exactly whispering. If he didn’t have to finish sanding the dresser drawers, he would have gone to the other side of the shop and let them have their privacy. But he wanted to get these drawers stained before the day’s end, and he wouldn’t be able to do that if he didn’t get busy sanding.
The grit of the sandpaper against the rough wood made a good amount of noise, but he could still hear his parents’ discussion.
“I think you’re overreacting, Em,” Joseph said.
“I’m not overreacting. You weren’t in there when they were talking. You didn’t see the way he looks at her. I can’t believe I didn’t notice before.”
“Maybe because there’s nothing to notice.”
“Joseph, I know what I saw. That young man’s got feelings for Moriah. No wonder he’s been dropping by so often.”
“You said he was just being courteous, and you liked his thoughtfulness.”
“That’s what I thought. Now I’m not so sure. What should we do?”
“I don’t see as we have to do anything.”
“I just don’t know if she’s ready for this. After everything she’s been through and with her being pregnant, she’s very vulnerable right now.”
“This is Gabe Miller we’re talking about here. He’s a good man. Always has been.”
“That’s what we thought about Levi. And look how that turned out.”
“Gabe and Levi are different people. You know that. Good boys, both of them, but different.”
Tobias flipped over the drawer and started sanding the wood on the underside. The movement must have alerted his parents, because they lowered their voices, much to his relief. The less he knew about Moriah’s situation with Gabe, the better off he would be. She was his sister and he cared about her, but that stuff was off limits, in his opinion.
Though she could do worse than Gabe. A lot worse. He had a good reputatio
n and was well liked by nearly everyone in the community. But as his mother pointed out, Levi had been as well, and what he had done to Moriah was inexcusable. Who was to say Gabe wouldn’t do the same thing?
With a shake of his head, he returned his attention to the job at hand. He had more important things to think about than Moriah and Gabe. Like getting this dresser done. And like thinking about Rachel Detweiler. Confound it, he couldn’t get that girl out of his mind. Especially the kiss she’d given him the night of the buggy crash. Her lips had been so soft, the kiss so whisper light, his senses reeled just thinking about it. He could tell she felt guilty over it, as she had made a point to remind him that she was Christian Weaver’s girlfriend. But she wasn’t the only one feeling guilty about that night. Even though she’d been the one who kissed him, he had been thinking about doing the same thing. She’d just beat him to it.
He’d mentally kicked himself more than a few times for betraying Christian. What kind of person was he to like another guy’s girl? And why did that girl have to be Rachel Detweiler? He’d spent most of his life disliking her. Now all he could think about was kissing her again.
“You keep sanding the wood like that you’re going to rub a hole in it.”
Tobias looked up to see his father’s stern expression. His mother was gone and he hadn’t even heard her leave. “Sorry, Daed. Guess I got distracted.”
“Pay attention next time.” Joseph took another look at the dresser, then walked away.
Blowing the large buildup of wood dust off the bookshelf, he turned it on its side and began sanding the top, forcing himself to focus. Even when Rachel wasn’t anywhere near him, she still made him forget his head.
Moriah opened the door and stared into the green eyes of a stranger. She didn’t recognize the Yankee woman who stood before her.
The visitor’s gaze turned from Moriah to Gabriel, and Moriah watched the green eyes widen, then the woman’s body begin to sway back and forth as if she were about to faint.
“Levi?” she said.
Confused, Moriah wondered how she knew Levi. But quickly, the woman’s expression changed from shock to disappointment. “His brother,” she said.
Moriah spun around. So Gabriel knew this woman too? “What’s going on?”
“I knew your late husband,” she said. “May I come in?”
Gabriel took a step forward until he was standing next to Moriah. “I don’t know if that’s a gut idea, Ms. Johnston.”
Johnston? “As in Johnston’s Farms?” Moriah regarded her again. The woman’s platform heels made her several inches taller than Moriah. Her luxuriant red hair hung in loose waves around her shoulders. She had vibrant green eyes and full, red-painted lips. Perfect skin and a flawless figure, as her tight, white, short-sleeved shirt and blue jeans showed. Moriah felt dwarfed by her presence, and didn’t doubt for a minute that she came from a family of great wealth.
“Yes. My father owns Johnston’s Farms. Where Levi used to work.” She held out her hand to Moriah. “I’m Taylor Johnston. ”
Still confused, she glanced at Gabriel briefly before inviting her inside. His expression remained guarded, and Moriah wondered what he had against this woman. “Please, sit down. Can I get you anything? Lemonade? Water?”
She shook her head. “I’m fine. I won’t take up too much of your time.” She cast a look at Gabriel, then turned her attention to Moriah again. “Can we speak in private?”
Moriah looked at Gabriel. Apparently he wasn’t thrilled with the idea, but Taylor seemed unnerved by his presence. “Gabriel, do you mind?”
He hesitated, saying, “It might be better if I stay.”
Moriah still felt unnerved by their unfinished conversation moments earlier, so she said, “I’ll be fine, Gabriel. Danki.”
He sighed. “Let me just grab my hat. I left it in the kitchen.”
While he was gone, Moriah motioned for Taylor to sit on the couch. “Are you sure I can’t get you anything?”
“I’m sure.” Taylor scanned the room. “So this is where Levi used to live?”
“Nee. This is my parents’ house.”
“Oh. I just assumed . . . when I stopped at the blacksmith shop, Mr. Miller said I could find you here. I thought you were still living in the same house.”
“I moved back here after Levi . . . left.”
Taylor’s cheeks reddened. “I see.”
Gabriel emerged from the kitchen. He looked at Moriah once more, the emotion she’d seen during their encounter in the kitchen still vivid in his expression. She had asked him why he cared about her, and when she saw the intensity of his gaze, the darkening of his brown eyes, she felt new emotions stir within her, which both thrilled and terrified her. Clearly she’d had a momentary lapse of reason, more than likely due to fatigue. Still, even though she could rationalize her feelings, she didn’t want to explore them any further. She refused to hope for anything other than a healthy baby.
“All right,” he said. “I’ll be back by in a couple of days.”
It was on the tip of her tongue to protest his visits yet again, but she wouldn’t argue in front of Taylor. Instead she barely nodded, a gesture that caused Gabriel to emit a small smile. She’d have to set him straight the next time.
He nodded toward Taylor, then left. Moriah thought she saw Taylor visibly relax once Gabriel was gone, and Moriah knew she was relieved to see him leave too.
“How do you know my brother-in-law?” Moriah asked.
“We met once,” Taylor responded, staring down at her hands. “He came out to the farm.”
“Oh.”
She looked up. “I’m so very, very sorry.”
“Thank you. Levi’s death has been hard on all of us.”
Taylor picked at her index finger with her thumb. “No, I mean I’m sorry for what I did to you and Levi.”
Everything seemed to slow down around Moriah, as if her life had been permanently yoked to a leaden, unmovable force. “What did you do?” Her voice sounded feeble in her ears.
“You mean you don’t know?” Taylor’s cheeks reddened even deeper. “That your husband and I had an affair?”
Moriah gasped. Taylor’s words wrenched her heart. “An affair?”
“It was my fault. Since the accident I’ve had to face some ugly truths about myself. One of those is that I don’t care who I hurt, as long as I get what I want.” She paused and looked at Moriah. “What I wanted was your husband. He resisted at first, but I can be persuasive. Very persuasive.”
Closing her eyes against the fresh new wave of pain assaulting her, Moriah said, “Why are you telling me this?”
“I honestly thought you knew.”
“How would I know?” She opened her eyes. “My husband left me. He didn’t explain anything in his letter, only that he was leaving me and his faith. And he didn’t want to be Amish anymore.
“Didn’t you wonder what made him come to that decision?”
She twisted the ends of the ties of her prayer kapp. “We believe marriage is for life. What God has brought together, no man—or woman—can break apart.” She rose from her chair, not wanting to hear anything this woman had to say. Not only had Taylor Johnston taken Levi, for some reason she wanted to push the knife further into Moriah’s back. “I think you should leave. Now.”
Taylor looked up at her. “Are you pregnant?”
Moriah gripped the ribbons on her kapp even more tightly. “Ya.”
“With Levi’s baby?”
Moriah’s eyes narrowed. “Ya.”
All along she had thought he left because of something she’d done, and because of his dissatisfaction with the Amish church. Now she knew the real reason. She had disappointed him so deeply on an intimate level he had taken up with another woman. Would there be no end to her pain? To her humiliation? “Please,” she whispered, perilously close to tears. “Just go.”
“I will, after I tell you why I’m here. Levi and I had been fighting a lot lately, and I could tell he was
n’t happy living with me and my father. Then he found out I wasn’t pregnant—”
“What?”
“I told him I was pregnant.” Taylor stared down at the floor for a moment, then jerked her head up. “Like I said, I’ve done a lot of soul searching. I was the one driving in the accident, and even though the police said it wasn’t my fault, Levi and I had been arguing right before the truck hit us.” She licked her lips. “He’d learned that I’d lied to him about being pregnant. We hadn’t been together that long, and I didn’t like the idea of losing him. So I told him I was pregnant so he would stick around.” She paused and looked down again. “And he told me right before the accident that he was coming back to you.”
Moriah breathed in sharply. “Why should I believe you?”
“Normally you shouldn’t.” She sighed. “But you deserve to know the truth. He said he made a terrible mistake by leaving.” Picking up her huge red leather handbag, she stood. “I just wanted you to know he still loved you . . . and still wanted to be Amish. He said leaving you and his faith had been a mistake.”
A blend of caustic emotions ran through Moriah. Hearing about Levi’s planned return did little to assuage her pain and grief. Still, she understood Taylor’s gesture. The woman didn’t have to come here and tell the news in person, yet she did. “Danki,” Moriah managed.
“Don’t thank me. I don’t deserve it. What I deserve is your hatred.”
“That is not our way.”
“I’ve heard that, but I didn’t really believe it. Not until now, and now I know he was right.” Taylor’s green eyes shimmered with tears. “I really am sorry,” she said in a thick whisper.
“I know.”
Taylor walked past her and out the door. Moriah didn’t move—she just stood there in the center of the living room, listening to Taylor’s car engine start and pull away. Only when the sound disappeared did she sit down on the couch. Her movements were still slow as she tried to process what Taylor had said.
The Hearts of Middlefield Collection Page 20
