“I should have been here.” Tears streamed down her face. “Why didn’t you tell me Mami was sick?”
“Because she didn’t want you to know. Up until the end, she thought she had it beat.” He wiped his eyes with his free hand. “She was a strong woman. Just not strong enough.”
“What happened the other day? When you were in the pasture?”
“I don’t really know. I’d been feeling poorly the past couple days, but I thought I was just tired. I hadn’t been sleeping well since Martha’s death. By the time I reached the back fence my chest felt as if it were on fire. The next thing I remember is Stephen standing over me when I woke up on the couch. If he hadn’t found me when he did . . .” He shook his head. “I owe that bu my life.”
Deborah nodded. “We all owe him so much.”
Her father squeezed her hand and then released it. “Geh check on your sister. I’m worried about her. She’s become so bitter over the years.”
“Do you know why?”
He shook his head. “Your mudder and I could never figure it out. We thought it might be jealousy over you.”
“Over me? She never wanted anything to do with me.”
“When you were a boppli she did. But then when you turned two, you got very sick and ended up in the hospital for two weeks.”
“I don’t remember that.”
He nodded. “Wouldn’t expect you to, and it’s not something we talked about. We couldn’t bring Naomi to the hospital. She was only twelve, so several women from church came by and watched her, plus made meals for us. Their husbands took care of the farm for me. When we brought you home, you needed lots of care for several months. Naomi wasn’t our priority anymore. You were.”
Deborah now saw where her sister’s bitterness stemmed from. “But that was so long ago. Why is she hanging on to it still?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe you should ask her.”
Deborah looked away. “She won’t talk to me.”
“You won’t know unless you try.”
She’d been trying to get Naomi to talk to her since coming back to Middlefield. Deborah doubted she could reach her now. But she wouldn’t tell her father that. She looked at him, seeing the weariness on his face. “I’ll leave you alone now. You get some more rest.”
He frowned, but his eyelids were only halfway open. “That’s all I’ve been doing. Are you maed going to keep me in bed for the rest of my life?”
She smiled, glad to see his feistiness returning. “Nee. But we will until you get better.”
She walked out of her father’s room, shut the door, and leaned against it. She thought about what he said. Was her sister bitter because of a childhood grudge? That seemed extreme, even for Naomi. Deborah suspected it had to be something else. She had to find out what it was, or there would be no peace in her family.
Deborah went into the kitchen to find Naomi. When she didn’t see her, she looked throughout the bottom floor of the house. Then she went upstairs and saw that Naomi’s bedroom door was closed. She knocked softly.
“What do you want?” Naomi sniffed.
Had her sister been crying? She couldn’t remember the last time Naomi had cried. Her sister hadn’t shed a tear at their mother’s funeral. “Can I come in?”
“Nee.”
But Deborah wasn’t about to give up, not this time. She turned the knob on the door and was glad it was unlocked. She eased the door open, then took a step inside. Her sister stood at the window, her back to Deborah, and didn’t turn around. After a few seconds, Deborah went to Naomi. She expected her to walk away, but she didn’t. They stared out at the barn and field in front of them, and just then Stephen and Will appeared from the barn, her sohn looking so tiny in Stephen’s huge arms.
“I suppose you two will get married.”
Deborah’s brow rose with surprise. “What makes you say that?”
Naomi wrapped her arms around her thin body. “I see the way he looks at you. I see how he is with your sohn.” She glanced at Deborah. “As usual, you get what you want.”
“You think I want him?”
“You do, don’t you?”
She looked back at Stephen, the image of them getting married and becoming a family suddenly becoming real. He said he cared for her, and she knew deep in her heart that she loved him. “Ya,” she whispered as he headed toward the house. “I think I do.”
Naomi walked away from the window. “Gut luck with your happy family, then.”
Deborah reached out and grabbed her sister’s arm. Jealousy and resentment emanated from Naomi. “Is that why you’re angry with me? Because of Stephen? Because of Will?”
“You don’t know how hard it is to want something you’ll never have.”
“Naomi, you can’t say that for sure.”
She turned away from the window.
“Daed told me about my being sick. I don’t even remember it. You can’t hang on to this jealousy—”
Her sister let out a bitter chuckle. “Of course you’d think this is about you. It’s always about you.”
“Isn’t it?”
“Never mind. I don’t want to talk about this.”
“Naomi.” Deborah went over to her. “We can’t spend the rest of our lives angry with each other. It’s not what God would want. We both know that. Please. Tell me what’s wrong. I don’t want us to fight anymore.”
Naomi sat down on her bed and stared at her hands, her shoulders slumped. Deborah moved to sit beside her. Naomi didn’t say anything for a long moment. Just when Deborah thought she wouldn’t respond and was giving her the silent treatment, Naomi finally spoke. “I thought I was going to get married once,” she whispered.
Deborah’s eyes lifted in shock. “You did?”
“Don’t be so surprised.”
“But I had no idea.”
“You were only eight, too young to know what was going on.”
“But Mami and Daed never said anything about it.”
“That’s because they didn’t know. No one did.” She raised her head and looked at Deborah, then quickly averted her gaze. “I couldn’t tell them I’d fallen in love with a Yankee.”
“What?” Deborah couldn’t believe what she was hearing.
Naomi nodded, still not looking at her. “We dated secretly for a few months.” She glanced at Deborah. Her eyes were dry, but her chin was quivering. “He said he loved me, that I was special. That we should move in together. He even said he wanted to get married someday. And because I loved him, I believed him. But I was a fool. Everything he told me was a lie so he could get what he wanted from me.”
Deborah’s heart sank. She knew exactly what Naomi was talking about. Chase had said all the right things, too, and his rejection had hurt. But she hadn’t been in love with Chase. She could only imagine the pain her sister had gone through.
“My friends had warned me about him. They told me he was no gut, but I didn’t believe them. I was ready to give up everything for him, including being Amish. Then I found out he was seeing someone else the whole time we were dating.”
“Oh, Naomi.” Deborah reached out and touched her arm. “I’m so sorry.”
“He manipulated me.” A hard edge crept into her tone. “Just like Stephen’s doing to you.”
“He’s not manipulating me, Naomi. I’ll admit that Chase did, but only because I let him. Stephen’s nothing like Chase. There are gut men in the world, Naomi. Not all of them are like Chase or . . .”
“Trey. His name was Trey.” She rose from the bed. “All my friends found a gut one. They married and have kinner. And I’m alone. I suppose that’s what I get for sinning against God.”
“I don’t believe that. You can’t judge yourself like this, Naomi. And you can’t assume that God’s punishing you for one mistake.”
Naomi shook her head. “It wasn’t just one mistake. I was willing to give up my faith. How could He forgive something like that?”
Things were starting to make sen
se. Her sister was pious to a fault, and now Deborah knew why. She still felt like she had to atone for the past, and she still carried around the hurt from Trey’s betrayal. She reached for Naomi’s hand. “Naomi, have you forgiven Trey?”
Naomi jerked her hand out of Deborah’s grasp. “That’s not any of your business. I should have never told you about him.” She lifted her chin, her eyes narrowing. “I don’t want to talk about this again, understand?”
“But—”
“I have to prepare supper. I’m sure Daed is hungry by now.” She started for the door, but Deborah tugged on her arm, trying to stop her. Naomi pulled away and walked out of the room.
Deborah sat on her sister’s bed and scanned her austere bedroom. She closed her eyes, her soul filled with sadness for her sister. She’d had no idea how deeply Naomi had been hurt, or how she blamed herself for it. Nothing Deborah could say would help Naomi give up the pain she insisted on clinging to. Only God could change her heart, and she would pray every day for that to happen.
“My goodness, Deborah. He’s quite a hottie.”
Deborah looked at Aunt Sadie and laughed. Her aunt had arrived for a surprise visit the day before, and now they were sitting on the front porch, snapping the last of the green beans they had picked from the garden. Over near the barn, Stephen had set Will on his broad shoulders. He looked over at the women and waved.
“Yep,” Sadie said, snapping a bean in half with one hand. “He’s a fine-looking man.” She glanced at Deborah. “And from all accounts, a very good man too.”
“That he is.” She waved back at Stephen and her son, then looked back at Sadie. “I’m so glad you’re here, Aenti.”
“Me too.” Her bright red lips curved into a smile. “Although I wish I had known about Moses before I got here.”
“We didn’t want to worry you, and he didn’t want the attention.” She picked up another green bean from the pile on the table and broke off the ends.
“I give you permission to worry me. I would have been here days ago if I had known.” She glanced over Deborah’s shoulder at Stephen again. “So what’s going on between you two?”
Deborah kept her gaze on the bowl in her lap, but she couldn’t hide her smile. “What makes you think there’s something going on?”
“Oh please. I’m old but not senile. I know two lovebirds when I see them. So when’s the wedding?”
“We’ve barely started to date, Aenti.” Although she had to wonder that herself. Neither of them had brought up marriage, but Deborah couldn’t imagine marrying anyone else. The more time she spent with Stephen, the more she fell in love with him.
“Fine, be coy about it. I’ll make sure to keep my calendar open this fall, just in case.”
Deborah grinned. It was great to be with her aunt again.
Stephen and Will headed toward them. When they reached the porch, Stephen lifted Will off his shoulders high in the air, letting him dangle there for a moment. Will burst into giggles as Stephen swung him down and set him on the porch. Stephen looked at Deborah, his blue eyes shining with warmth. Deborah could feel her cheeks heat underneath his tender gaze.
Sadie mumbled something about lovebirds, then set her bowl of green beans on the table and reached for Will. “Looks like this punkin’s been having too much fun in the dirt.” She rose from the rocker and took his hand. “Bath time for you, little man!”
After Sadie and Will walked into the house, Stephen sat down in the rocker next to Deborah and leaned his arms over his knees. “It’s gut to see you smile.”
She nodded. “I have a lot to smile about.” And she did. Two weeks had passed since her father’s heart attack, and he was gaining more strength each day. And even though Naomi was still distant, her attitude had softened toward her and Will. She even offered to watch him a few days ago while Deborah went to town for the first time. That spurred Deborah to pray even harder for her sister. She wanted Naomi to heal.
Stephen angled his chair toward her, his expression suddenly serious. “I need to talk to you about something. I hope you’ll still be smiling after I’m done.”
Deborah dropped the green bean she’d just snapped into the bowl, alarmed. “Is there something wrong?”
“Nee.” He reached for her hand. “Deborah, everything is right. It has been since I met you.” He covered her hand with his other one. “I know we haven’t known each other that long, so this might seem sudden. But it’s the truth. I love you, Deborah. I want to be a husband to you, and a father to Will. But . . .” He looked away, swallowing.
She frowned. “But what?”
He met her eyes again. “I don’t want you to think I’m marrying you because of the farm. In fact, I don’t want it.”
“You don’t want to be a farmer anymore?”
“Nee. That hasn’t changed. But if I thought for minute you doubted my reasons for marrying you, I’d give up the idea of farming.”
“Oh, Stephen, I could never doubt you. And I would never ask you to give up your dream of farming.” She smiled, her heart swelling with love for this gentle giant of a man.
He let out a deep breath and squeezed her hand. “That’s what I was hoping you’d say.”
The front door opened and Aunt Sadie walked out, Will cradled in the crook of her arm. She looked from Deborah to Stephen, her lips spreading in a fat grin. “Now, now, don’t mind us.”
From the satisfied look on her aunt’s face, Deborah knew her aunt hadn’t just appeared. “You were eavesdropping again,” she said as Stephen dropped her hand and leaned back in the chair. His cheeks reddened.
“Absolutely not. I was casually listening. There’s a big difference.” Sadie glanced from her to Stephen. “Don’t stop on my account. I just came out here to get Will’s toy. He kept asking for that wooden horse of his. There, I see it.” She went to the opposite end of the porch and picked it up off the floor. Then she turned back around and walked inside. “Carry on,” she said before shutting the door.
“Well,” Stephen said, still looking a little embarrassed. “That wasn’t exactly how I expected my proposal to geh.” He rose from the rocker and stood in front of her, holding out his hand. “But it doesn’t matter. As long as you say you’ll be my wife.”
Deborah took his hand and stood. “I’d be honored to be your wife.”
Smiling, he leaned down, giving her a soft, quick kiss on the mouth. Then he drew her into his arms.
She closed her eyes and leaned against him, marveling at how God had brought them together. He knew what they both needed and wanted, even before they realized it themselves. He had known it all along.
Epilogue
ONE YEAR LATER
Zach, what are you doing?” Ruth glanced over her shoulder as he grabbed her hand and led her to the other side of Lukas’s house. When they were shielded from her entire family, he let go of her hand. She leaned against the white siding of the house and put her hands on her hips. “Well? Are you going to answer me or not?”
He grinned, putting both hands on either side of her face, then drew her mouth to his for a lingering kiss. “How’s that for an answer?”
Breathless, she nodded. “Gut answer.” Then she shook her head and regained her senses. “You can’t do that here. What if my family catches us?”
“I’m a troublemaker, remember? I have a reputation to uphold.”
“Sorry, that reputation has been shattered for months.” She smiled at the joy on his face. He had come so far in the past year learning to read. He hadn’t been exaggerating when he said it would be difficult to teach him. Through her research, she discovered he was dyslexic, and it had taken several months and a lot of determination on his part to succeed. Witnessing his drive had made her fall more deeply in love with him, and they would be getting married in mid-November, which was only three weeks away.
As much as she wouldn’t mind spending time alone with him right now, they both knew it wouldn’t be appropriate. “We better get back before anyone misses u
s.”
“I think they’re all too busy to notice.” He leaned forward again, but she put her finger to his lips. He smiled against it and stepped away. “All right, you win. This time.”
She laughed as they went back around to where the rest of the family were gathered. She could only imagine what he meant by that. Zach had changed a lot in the past year, but he hadn’t lost his impulsiveness. And for someone who never liked surprises, she didn’t mind his at all.
“Where did you guys geh off to?” Ruth’s mother asked when she and Zach joined her at the picnic table. Lukas had set up several of the tables in his spacious backyard. One table was devoted completely to food where, not surprisingly, she saw Stephen piling up his plate.
“We took a walk.” Zach looked at his future mother-in-law, his eyes wide with innocence. Ruth had to look away before she started to laugh.
Emma peered at him over her eyeglasses, but didn’t say anything. “Did you two get enough to eat?”
“Ya,” Ruth said, sitting next to her mother.
“I doubt there’s any left if we didn’t,” Zach added, joining them. “I see Stephen’s hit the table pretty hard.”
“I heard that.”
Ruth turned and saw her brother a few feet away. He grinned as he sat down with them. “Where’s Deborah?” she asked.
“With the kinner.” He gestured with his thumb to the sandbox several yards away. Deborah, Elisabeth, Moriah, and Rachel were sitting near it, keeping an eye on the children. He took a bite of potato salad, then wiped his bearded chin with his napkin. He and Deborah had married in January and were staying at the Coblentz farm with her father and sister until he built a house of his own.
“Stephen! Zach!” Lukas’s foster son, Sawyer, called out from the other side of the yard. His dark brown hair lifted in the cool fall breeze. “Get over here. We need two more players to make the teams even.”
“Just a minute.” Stephen wolfed down a couple more bites of food, then handed his plate to Ruth. He trotted over to Sawyer, who was conferring with Tobias, Lukas, and Aaron. The men wore baseball gloves, and Aaron was tossing a baseball up and down in his right hand.
The Hearts of Middlefield Collection Page 72
