Kayne stared at her, a brief flash of vulnerability caused by her revelation slipping through. There and gone, replaced by a hard edge that had dread spinning through her belly.
No. She refused to let this man—this bully—affect her that way. She’d spent her life tiptoeing around her own family in the hopes they’d eventually want her, love her. She’d be damned if she’d cower for this man simply because she was in love with his son.
Maybe especially because she was in love with his son.
Even if he didn’t give a damn about her and was willing to do whatever it took to rip her life apart.
“As you can guess, we’re going to decline your offer, Mr. Kayne. Please don’t ever come here again.” Standing, Alyssa pointed to the door. “Since you managed to find your way back here unassisted, I’m certain you’re capable of showing yourself out.”
His jaw pulsed with barely restrained anger. With sharp movements, Kayne gathered the documents he’d spread across her desk. “You’re going to regret this decision.”
She seriously doubted it. “Possibly, but that’s not your concern. I make it a point not to do business with ruthless assholes.”
“No, you simply screw them.”
Alyssa drew in a ragged breath.
“Touching though it is, your loyalty is misplaced, Ms. Vaughn. There’s no room in business for heart and Beckett knows that better than anyone. You’re nothing more than a plaything to my son. A novelty and a challenge. He doesn’t really give a damn about you.... After all, he’s still holding that little loan over your head, isn’t he?”
Kayne tossed her a knowing, sympathetic glance. His pity, false though it was, cut straight to the bone. Just as he’d intended.
Alyssa tried not to let it show. She used the frigid, insulating layers of control to still her expression. But it hurt.
Because, deep down, she knew he was right.
Alyssa’s knees trembled, but she hid the weakness behind her desk. Locking her body down, she forced her spine straight and stared into Kayne’s expectant gaze. The familiar walls of ice she’d used for years to isolate her from the pain formed easily—too easily. She hadn’t needed them for a very long time, but today they were the only thing preventing her from collapsing in a ball of grief and self-pity.
She hated self-pity. It was an unproductive emotion, but one she apparently couldn’t cure herself of.
Apparently disappointed at her lack of reaction to his harsh words, Kayne finally turned to leave. But not before getting in one last shot.
“Perhaps I was wrong about you. Maybe you are heartless enough to keep pace with Beckett.”
She wasn’t, but she’d had years of pretending. And she was going to use whatever means available to get herself through this—if not entirely unscathed, then as intact and untouched as possible.
13
BECKETT WALKED INTO Alyssa’s apartment and stopped. He wasn’t sure what he’d expected when she’d called and asked him to come over so she could cook dinner...but this wasn’t it. Maybe some pasta, a quiet night together watching mindless TV while he licked her from head to toe and buried himself deep in her tight, wet core.
Not a gourmet meal served on gleaming china complete with fragrant flowers and candlelight.
He should be panicking. Probably. But he wasn’t. Not with the soft golden glow flickering across her pale skin.
She stood beside the table, her fist gripped tight around the edge of a chair. That should have been his first clue something wasn’t right, but he was too stunned—and turned on—to notice.
Alyssa still wore her clothes from the office, the tight skirt, pale shirt and string of pearls that she preferred.
Except, somewhere along the way she’d tossed off the heels to show her pale-pink-painted toenails. And several of the buttons of her shirt had been undone...all the way to the very edge of her bra. Tonight it was a dusty rose satin that shimmered in the dancing light.
He had to touch her.
Crossing the space between them, Beckett enveloped her in his arms and claimed her warm, lush mouth.
Breathless, he finally pulled back, whispering, “Hi,” against her smooth skin.
“Hi,” she said, meeting his gaze head-on. He could see the lust glistening there, recognized it because the same response was storming his body. Always did when she was close.
But there was something in her voice that had him unsettled. A...distance. Hesitation.
A sense of foreboding crawled up his spine, tightening the spot right between his shoulder blades. She was saying and doing all the right things, but this wasn’t right.
Beckett pushed away, so he could study her. She stared straight into him...and showed him absolutely nothing. She was now wearing a mask, as surely as he’d been that first night. The problem was, hers had no visible strings he could sever to free her from the decorative facade.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, desperation clawing at his throat.
“Nothing,” she answered. Too quickly.
He curled his fingers into her shoulders. Logically he knew he was holding on too tight, but he couldn’t unclench enough to let her go. She was slipping away and he had no idea why or how to stop it. She didn’t even seem to notice the deep impression of his fingers into her skin.
That, more than anything, scared him. It was as if she was frozen. Hell, even her skin felt cold.
His heart thumped erratically inside his chest. Any moment he expected her to tell him this was over. Instead, she pressed closer, the warm swell of her breasts pressing hard against the tight confines of her shirt and bra to rub against his chest.
The move was deliberate. And far be it from him to complain about an empowered woman who knew what she wanted and wasn’t afraid to go after it with everything she had. Any other time, he’d be thrilled to let Alyssa seduce him.
But he’d seen her blissed out with passion. He’d seen her so aroused she could barely contain the energy of her desire inside her own skin.
And she was far from that right now. Oh, her body was responding to the stimulation, her nipples hardening into tight buds where they brushed against the silky material of her bra. But her heart wasn’t in it.
“Tell me,” he ground out, trying to use his head to overrule the lust attempting to convince him it didn’t matter, he’d take Alyssa any way he could get her.
But that wasn’t true. After last night, when she’d offered him the solace of her body, he wanted more than sex and arousal. He wanted all of her—body, mind and soul.
She shook her head.
It took everything inside him, but he wrapped his fingers around her arms and shoved her away. She drew in a harsh breath, the hurt that flashed through her gaze almost enough for him to take the action back.
Until those pale-green eyes turned to glittering, cutting stones. Her mouth rolled in, her teeth grinding together.
“Drop the loan.”
“What?” Beckett asked, the incredulous word blasting through his suddenly dazed lips.
“The loan. Don’t call it in. Let us have the full term to pay it back.”
Beckett started to tell her...he wasn’t sure what. Yes. Sure. Anything you want, sprang to mind. But his head overruled his dick...just in time.
Snapping his mouth shut, his gaze bounced around the room, taking in the scene she’d so expertly set with an entirely different mindset than the one he’d walked in with.
Oh, it was still clearly a seduction scene. But this time, there was nothing pure about it. He could see the calculation as clearly as the twisted look of pain on her face.
His gaze raked down her body. Disappointment and anger coiled deep in his belly.
God, she’d played him.
“Beckett, please,” she tried to say, but he could see
the words were killing her. She nearly choked on them, forcing herself to swallow and spit them out. “Don’t do this to me. To my company. I’ve worked hard to get V&D to this point. Don’t take it all away. If you care about me at all...”
He laughed, the harsh sound scraping against his own ears. If he cared about her. He loved her, dammit.
And she was standing there, ready to use whatever advantage she had to get what she wanted. She’d called him ruthless...he could take lessons from her.
Unfortunately, she was better at writing code than she was at playing a role. It was clear from the way she’d scooted away from him, wrapping her arms around herself to block any attempt at touching her, that she didn’t want to be near him. Probably never had.
He wasn’t ego driven enough to think every woman he came in contact with wanted him. He’d been rejected in his life.
But Alyssa’s rejection hurt worse. And what really cut him was her betrayal. He’d opened up to her, spilled his guts. The most amazing sexual and emotional experience of his life had been a lie.
“Why did you come back, Alyssa? Why did you let me take you home from that party last night? At the ball...you made it clear you never wanted me to touch you again. And one night later you’re stripping yourself bare and coming all over my sheets. What changed?”
“I...” Her mouth opened and closed, like a fish caught on a line and desperate for water. Or a liar searching for a good excuse.
“Was it all about the loan?”
He wanted to hear her say no. Even as his body screamed at him to lash out or protect himself, his brain begged and pleaded for her to tell him he’d misunderstood.
But she didn’t say anything, simply stared at him, her eyes clear and vacant.
God, and to think he’d been planning to do exactly what she’d just asked. Better, he already had his team of lawyers working on drawing up papers that would forgive the loan completely.
But there was no way in hell he was going to tell her that. Not now.
“I have to hand it to you, Alyssa. At least you’re dedicated.”
Shaking his head, Beckett tried to will back the blistering trail of bile rising up his throat.
He felt used. Betrayed. Crushed. Broken.
It had been a damn long time since he’d felt this way...fourteen years to be exact. How appropriate that just this morning his father had warned him this was all going to blow up in his face.
Clenching his hands into fists, Beckett took a step away from her. He had to leave.
“I take it that’s a no,” Alyssa said, her arms curling tighter around herself.
“No, Alyssa. I won’t drop the loan.” Bitterness twisted through his gut, a slow moving poison that threatened to rot him from the inside out. “There’s no heart in business. Or pleasure.”
“The only thing that matters is the bottom line,” she threw at him, her beautiful mouth contorting into something ugly.
“Absolutely.”
And because there was a piece of him that wanted to hurt her as much as she’d just hurt him, Beckett closed the space between them. He brushed a finger down the silky texture of her cheek and leaned close. His whispered words fell across her lips.
“I guess neither of us is good at screwing people out of money, huh?”
* * *
THE ACHE INSIDE her chest was a gaping wound she couldn’t seem to cauterize. But she didn’t have time to worry about that. Not yet. Right now, she had to save her business and prevent Beckett from winning.
She had one option left. The one she’d been avoiding from the very beginning. Bridgett.
Alyssa prided herself on the fact that, from the moment she’d moved out of her father’s house, she’d never asked him or his wife for a single cent.
She’d stood on her own two feet for years. It galled her that she was in this position. And it was difficult not to blame Beckett for that, even if she and Mitch were the ones who’d taken out the loan in the first place.
His betrayal hurt. More than she wanted it to. She’d worked so hard in the past few years, keeping herself shut off and protected. One night, one bad decision, and all that work had crumbled, leaving her vulnerable.
And Beckett had swooped in to exploit the opening, using it to get everything he wanted—her and her Watch Me app.
God, she’d known better than to fall for the man. He was fierce and dangerous. It had been a walk on the wild side. A chance to explore, experiment and indulge.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
So, now here she was, on her way out of the city to visit the one person who would delight in rubbing her nose in her misery. Bridgett’s favorite phrase was “I told you so.”
Alyssa winced and closed her eyes for a brief moment. The temptation to leave them closed and pretend this whole thing wasn’t happening was strong. But she wasn’t the kind of woman to give up.
She’d take the hit, absorb it and move on. As she always did. What was one more emotional scar?
Her cell rang, drawing her out of the miserable thoughts. Glancing down at the screen, she bit off a groan. Ignoring the call wouldn’t get her anywhere though so she answered.
“Mitch.”
“Megan said you weren’t coming in today. What are you doing?” His tone said he’d already guessed, but was hopeful he was wrong.
“What you think. Heading to see Bridgett.”
Silence greeted her words. The weight of it pressed into her through the open line.
Finally, he said, “You don’t have to do this.”
Mitch, better than anyone, understood just what this would cost her. He’d had the privilege of witnessing the aftermath of Bridgett’s venom.
“Yes, I do.”
“We’ll find another way, Lys.”
“What, Mitch? When? We already punted and didn’t make the end zone. This is our Hail Mary. I’ll be fine.”
He let out a heavy sigh. “At least let me go with you. You shouldn’t do this alone.”
Alone was the only way she’d be able to handle it. Otherwise she wouldn’t be able to maintain the cold outer shell she desperately needed to get through the next hour.
So she lied. “I’m already halfway there. No sense in turning around now.” In reality, she’d barely left her place. “I’ll call you when it’s done.”
She could sense his frustration and concern through the line, but didn’t have the energy to worry over it now.
“I’d do anything to fix this, Lys.”
“I know.”
* * *
“GOD, YOU’RE SUCH an asshole, Kayne.”
The voice echoing through his cell startled Beckett. His heart had fluttered when he’d seen V&D’s number pop up on his screen. She was calling him.
Only she wasn’t. Her business partner was.
It took Beckett several precious moments for his brain to switch gears and catch up to the actual conversation. Not that it really helped.
“What?”
“Do you have any idea what she’s doing right now?”
“No.”
“She’s driving out to her stepmother to ask for a loan to pay you off.”
“Oh, shit.” Assuming everything she’d told him over the past few days was true and not just lies for effect, Beckett didn’t need a neon sign to realize this was not good.
“Exactly,” Mitch growled. “Did she tell you your asshole father paid us a visit yesterday?”
“No.” She hadn’t. And that bothered him, although he didn’t know why. She’d been hiding things from him all along, why not that, as well?
It also pissed him off. His father had blatantly ignored the warning he’d given. The man didn’t realize anything had changed between him and Alyssa.
“Well, then you�
��re probably also unaware that he offered her an obscene amount of money for Watch Me and the app we were set to sell to Eaton until yesterday. That deal was going to be enough to pay off the loan.”
What? She hadn’t mentioned another deal to him. Although, if it was to clear the loan he supposed she had good reason not to.
But if, up until yesterday, she’d had an out...
Was it possible nothing that had happened between them was about gaining an advantage to use against him?
For the first time since he’d stormed out of her apartment last night a small ray of hope broke through the tormenting pain.
Beckett collapsed into his chair, relief flowing freely through him. Although, it was quickly replaced by alarm.
He’d screwed up, letting his own insecurities blind him to the possibility that he was misinterpreting the signs. He’d pushed Alyssa away twelve years ago, determined not to become his father, a man satisfied with using people to get what he wanted. And the thought that she’d callously turned the tables and done that exact thing to him had been...heartbreaking, agonizing and enraging.
But he already had a surefire way to fix the damage he’d caused. For some reason, he hadn’t been able to work up the energy to contact his lawyers this morning to stop the paperwork they were drawing up.
“She turned my father down? Before or after the deal with Eaton fell through?”
A strangled sound of irritation slipped across their connection, but Beckett wouldn’t apologize. He had to know.
“After.”
His eyes squeezed shut with hope.
“So she really thought there was little hope for paying me back?”
“Oh, no, she’s always had a surefire way to make the whole mess go away. But it’s going to cost her. Majorly. So she’s been putting it off as an absolute last resort. Which is why you’re an asshole. If you let her go to Bridgett and beg...”
“I won’t. I’m going to fix this.”
Beckett didn’t wait for Mitch’s response before he hung up on the man. He had several more important calls to make. He didn’t have enough time to cut Alyssa off at the pass and stop at the office. Someone was going to have to meet him with the papers.
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