Her self-esteem thus bolstered, Calia made her way to Gio’s office. Upon learning her name, the front receptionist disconcerted Calia by telling her that she was expected and should go right in. As she rode the elevator to the executive floor, Calia frowned, wondering what was going on. She had expected to fight her way in to see Gio, and instead was getting an open sesame.
Daria, Gio’s assistant, smiled at Calia’s approach. “Go ahead in,” she commented, nodding towards the closed door of Gio’s office.
But Calia paused, frowning. What was he up to? Suddenly, she was uncertain. It was one thing to force her way into hostile territory, guns blazing and ready to do battle. It was quite another to pass through that same landscape without resistance. It made her suspect a trap.
“He is expecting you,” Daria added encouragingly, as she observed Calia’s hesitation.
“I was actually just stopping by to pick up some papers. He was supposed to leave them for me at the front desk.”
Daria shook her head. “You will have to ask him—he told me nothing of these papers. I am sorry.”
And so, after squaring her shoulders, Calia let herself into his office and closed the door behind her. Things could get messy, after all. Best to contain the fallout as best she could.
Gio looked up as she entered, his scowl relaxing into a smile. “Where did you go, yesterday? Why did you not wait for me to come back?”
She frowned at him. “You made yourself quite clear. I had no intention of outstaying my welcome.”
“I spoke to Paolo.”
“Right.” But seeing him brought back all the hurt and anger at his unfounded accusations. She wasn’t going to make things easy for him. She smoothed the glare out of her expression, and forced a casual tone. “I guess that makes sense, then.”
“What makes sense?”
“I planned to have my say with you today, whether you wanted to believe me or not. After what you told me last night about not wanting to hear anything more from me, I figured I’d have to fight my way in.” She shrugged, as if it were a matter of indifference to her. Which it was, she decided, as she felt an aching fury at the ease with which this man had hurt her—and could do so again, if she allowed it. “So I imagine Paolo set the record straight, then.”
“He did. He also made it quite clear what he thought of my behaviour—towards him, yes, but also towards you, when he learned of it.”
“Paolo is a good man.”
“He is my brother, in spirit if not in blood.”
“I gather you two are reconciled, then?”
“Of course. He has taken the morning off in order to meet with a divorce lawyer.”
“I’m glad to hear it. So, may I have my contract, please? Then I’ll be out of your hair.”
“You can stop this pretense of yours, Calia. We both know that you came to patch things up between us. So, I apologise for my hasty words yesterday. I am sorry. I misjudged you,” he said, his tone indulgent, as if he were placating a child. He sat back, allowing his gaze to linger over her, his expression betraying a combination of amusement and lust. “Tell me where you are staying and I will come by to pick up your things.”
He really thought it was going to be that easy. She shook her head, disbelief briefly eclipsing her anger. “If you don’t have the contract, just say so. I’ll go get it printed elsewhere and fax it over myself.”
“Calia.” His rich, lightly accented voice caressed her name. In spite of herself, she felt a shiver of hot, yearning lust. Her body wanted to be caressed in just the same way. “Stop being stubborn. I have said I am sorry.” He was watching her with an open warmth in his expression. But mixed with that was a patronizing confidence that added fuel to Calia’s burgeoning hostility.
“Right,” she snapped. “Sorry until the next time. You didn’t even give me a hearing yesterday—just jumped to conclusions, based on your own prejudices, I might add, and flung accusations at me.”
The smile slipped from his face, to be replaced by the beginnings of annoyance. “So, what do you want me to do? Plead for your indulgence and beg you to return to my bed?”
“You really don’t get it, do you? You’re so swamped by your own biases that you can’t even see how destructive they are.”
“This again? You are nothing if not persistent. So what are you demanding, then?” Derision had crept into his tone. “That I go to a… what is it you call it? Head shrinker?… before you will deign to accept my apologies?”
She shook her head. “Even now, you’re not listening to me. Okay. I’m going to spell it out for you.”
She came forward into the office, glaring at him. “Here’s the deal, Gio. I was starting to care about you. Like it or not—and believe me, I didn’t like it at all—I was actually falling in love with you. But yesterday, it was like we were back to square one. You were angry and upset about Paolo. And when you looked at me, I was no longer me, Calia. I was your mother—and every woman since who behaved in a way that reinforced the mistrust she had engendered.”
She placed her hands on her desk and met his gaze head on. “Facile or not, my opinion is that you’ve got some major issues to work through. You really hurt me yesterday. I was devastated. While I had been falling in love, it was like you had never seen me as a person at all. I was just some woman you slept with and all those moments we had, when I believed we were building some rapport—illusory. Total self-deception.”
He opened his mouth to speak, but she held up a hand. “No. You didn’t let me have my say yesterday. I’m having it now.” She swung away from him and paced across his office, then turned back to face him. “I’m walking away, Gio. I’m not a lapdog, to come at your call. You can’t just smile and apologize and make it okay. You betrayed my trust with your unjustified assumptions.” She shook her head. “I have no reason to believe you won’t do that again, the next time you get angry. So I’m not going to risk it. I’m not going to give you another chance to hurt me.”
She gave him a tight smile. “And it suddenly occurs to me how that’s rather like what you did to me, isn’t it? Assumed that because your trust had been betrayed in the past, it would happen again in the future. Only it wasn’t me who destroyed your trust in the first place.
“Have a nice life, Gio. I wish you the best.” She placed her hand on the doorknob and was about to pull the door open, when his voice stopped her.
“Calia.”
She turned. He was standing, watching her, his eyes dark and his expression grim. As she watched, his lips curled into a sneer. “This is your last chance. I will not come to you, you know.”
Her shoulders slumped. What had she been hoping for? “I know.”
She opened the door.
“You will be back,” he said.
“Goodbye, Gio.” She let herself out and quietly closed the door behind her.
CHAPTER NINE
Wasn’t time supposed to fly when you had too much to do and too little time in which to do it? Yet, somehow, even though she was frantically busy, the days and the hours hung heavy on Calia’s hands.
It had been a month since she last saw Gio. She had been in Canada for two weeks, clearing out her apartment and tying up loose ends. She had packed the general necessities she’d need in Frankfurt, put her larger pieces of furniture in storage and sold or given away everything else.
For the last two weeks, she had been busy settling into her new place, getting a feel for the city and adjusting to the challenges of her new job, which had taken up the bulk of her time. She was still adjusting to the language change—though her German was fluent, speaking it all day, every day, could sometimes be exhausting. In addition, she had a big learning curve to negotiate. Most days, she didn’t get back to her place before nine or nine-thirty at night, at which point, she would be too exhausted to even think of unpacking. Dinner usually consisted of some toast with cheese, eaten while poring over quarterly reports. Then, she’d fall into bed.
Her apartment still h
ad that vacant, impersonal feel to it and she was in no better shape, herself. She had lost weight and her eyes had acquired permanent shadows under them, which she concealed under makeup so that her co-workers wouldn’t comment. They were a friendly group, and she had even gone out for beers with them on a few occasions. But often as not, as they headed on home, she would return to the office for a few hours, telling herself that she still had lots of catching up to do before she would be up to speed.
Nor was she alone in her process of transition. It seemed that there had been some sort of takeover bid on the firm while Calia had been caught up in the whirl of relocating to Germany. Ownership of the company had changed hands, and though Calia remained murky on the details—not much caring who owned the company, so long as she still had a job—she also told herself that she wanted to reach the point where she was truly earning her keep as soon as possible. She didn’t want the new owners to conclude she was a dead weight.
And, truth be told, she was glad to keep busy—glad that she was so exhausted by the time she went to sleep that she usually couldn’t remember any dreams she had when she awoke the next morning. Because on those few occasions when she did recall certain fleeting images, they all seemed to involve Gio.
And, even after all these weeks, when she didn’t keep her mind engaged with figures, stats and analyses, she found her thoughts straying to him. Though she had resolved, upon leaving his office, that she wasn’t going to waste even a moment pining over him, she also knew that there were different ways to pine. And working herself sick with exhaustion definitely qualified.
But that seemed a better alternative to becoming weepy and maudlin over how much she missed him—both in and out of bed. He had been surprisingly good company, when they hadn’t been arguing. Now, it had reached the point where she had even begun to miss their arguments.
As she let herself into the office—as usual, she was one of the first to arrive in the morning—she shoved such reflections aside. She would not weaken. She had said her goodbyes to him, and under no circumstances would she go crawling back, just to be hurt again and again by his mistrust.
She would simply have to get over him. It might take a while, but eventually, she would be able to go a few minutes without thinking about him. Then, a few hours. Eventually, a whole half day.
Calia didn’t even try to imagine a time when she would be able to go a whole day without thinking about him. Baby steps.
After unlocking the door to her own, private office, she booted up her computer, got herself some coffee and settled in for the day.
She was startled by the shrill of her telephone. A glance at her watch indicated that it was almost eleven a.m. Though she vaguely recalled nodding her greetings to several of her co-workers as they popped their heads into her office to say their good mornings, she had been working for almost five hours straight.
The phone rang again and she yanked the handset off its cradle. “Hallo, hier ist Ryan.”
It was the front receptionist. “You have a visitor. I’m sending him through.”
Calia wasn’t expecting anyone, but before she could ask for more details, the other woman had disconnected. Calia stared at the handset in bemusement, before returning it to its cradle. Presumably, it was someone from one of their client companies, though until now, they had never stopped in without an appointment—usually with one of the more experienced analysts on staff. Calia would be invited in for introductions and to listen in on the meetings as an observer.
“Calia.”
She had to be imagining things. All these long hours were finally starting to get to her. Because she was certain she had just heard his voice. And now, looking at the doorway, she could see him. Standing there, watching her with his hypnotic, silver eyes.
She blinked and shook her head. The apparition remained.
So maybe it wasn’t her imagination, after all.
“Gio,” she said, experimentally. He waited. She frowned. “What are you doing here?”
He shrugged. “Taking a tour of my latest asset?”
Her mouth dropped open in angry astonishment. “Oh, for God’s sake—that sets a new standard of arrogance, even for you. Not to mention being presumptuous and demeaning.”
He looked at her as if she had gone mad. “I am talking about this office. This company. One of my subsidiaries bought it a few weeks ago.”
“Oh.” Her eyes slid away from him, and she lapsed into embarrassed silence, before the absurdity of the exchange struck her and she let out a reluctant chuckle. “Right. Of course. They did mention something about a change of ownership when I started here. I didn’t realise it was one of your companies, though.”
Another silence. Then, “How are you, Calia?”
She made herself look straight at him, forced a smile onto her lips. “I’m fine thanks, Gio. How are you?” The question came out sounding more sarcastic than she intended.
She allowed her gaze to roam over him. He looked tired—but still too sexy for her own peace of mind, damn the man. It hurt to see him again. Physically. Emotionally.
She really hadn’t expected it to hurt this much. Then again, she hadn’t expected to see him again, either.
He ignored her question, the beginnings of a frown forming between his brows as he looked at her. “You have lost weight.”
“Oh, it’s just this office—something about the lighting, I think. It makes me look skinny.” Could she manage to sound more fatuous if she tried?
The scowl darkened. “Will you stop it?”
“Stop what? Making polite chitchat? Sorry—here I thought that was why you decided to stop by on your way to wherever. To make stilted conversation with an ex-lover.”
“You know that is not why I am here.”
“I know no such thing.” She let out a slow breath. “All right, Gio. So you’ve evidently got some kind of purpose in mind. Why not get to the point?”
“You are not making this easy.” He stepped into her office and closed the door. “We have things to discuss, Calia. It is not over between us.”
The breath squeezed out of her lungs and she went completely still, staring at him. Willing him to be saying what she wanted him to be saying. About them. And about the possibility of a future together.
“Well?” he prompted, after several moments. “Are you not going to say something? One of your sarcastic little rebuttals, perhaps?”
She shook her head. “Not now. This is too important.”
“Did you mean it when you said you were falling in love with me?”
She swallowed, hard. “I might have been understating things a little.” Though she dearly wanted to look anywhere but at his face, she forced herself to hold his gaze. “I had already fallen in love with you, in fact.” Why did she sound so breathless all of a sudden?
He was about to speak, when she shook her head. “No. Please,” she said. “See the thing is, Gio, that doesn’t change anything.”
He glared at her. “It changes everything—how can you not see that?” He moved forward into her cramped office, his body radiating impatience. “You trusted me enough to fall in love with me. Despite everything. And while I was busy denying my feelings and trying to find excuses to hold you at arm’s length, you were honest enough, with yourself and with me, to admit to them.”
“Let’s not overstate things. I was only honest about them once I figured I had nothing to lose anyway,” she said dryly.
He reached across the desk, tracing the line of her jaw with his finger. His touch was electric. He held her gaze, a rueful smile touching his mouth. “I wasn’t even honest about them then,” he said.
She closed her eyes, something shaking deep inside her. “Just say it, Gio—but only if you mean it. I can’t stand this. I really can’t.”
His hand touched her chin, gently urging it up. “Open your eyes, Calia. Look at me.”
After bracing herself, she complied. His gaze was tender, his expression warm. “I love you, Calia. More
than I thought it would be possible to love anyone—leave alone an outspoken, opinionated, sarcastic career woman. Someone who refuses to accept that I am always right. Someone who calls me on it when I am being arrogant or unreasonable.”
Her throat felt tight, but she decided to speak around it anyway. “Not that you’re ever arrogant or unreasonable….”
He smiled tenderly. “And you were right, Calia. I was too angry to see it at the time, but once I cooled down, I realised that everything you said was true. After what happened with Paolo, I did jump to conclusions—conclusions based, not on what I knew about you, but on my past experiences with other women.”
He moved around the desk and swiveled her chair to face him. With gentle hands he urged her to stand. “I will not do it again, tesoro mio. I was a fool to do it in the first place—and a bigger fool to try to brush it off later. It is just that I have been so used to getting my way, with minimal inconvenience on my part. And certainly, without any need for soul searching.”
Calia touched his face. “I love you, Gio. But I don’t know how we could make this work. I have a career—and giving that up would be like relinquishing part of myself. I still want children, of course. And when they came, they’d be my number one priority, but I would still want to work.”
“One of the advantages of having near-unlimited resources is that these sorts of logistics are made all that much more straightforward.” He touched her face. “I happen to have an apartment in Frankfurt. A very nice one, in fact. One with an exceedingly comfortable bed, I will add.”
She frowned, still puzzled. “So how—?”
“We will divide our time between Frankfurt and Rome,” he said simply. “My apartment here is a penthouse. I will have a helipad installed.”
Her mind was still reeling with this sudden development. Was it really Gio, here, telling her that he wanted to be with her? That he was willing to turn his life around in order to do so? She shook her head.
Her Roman Holiday Page 15
