by Anne Rice
Chapter 22
22
THE NEXT FEW MONTHS passed in freedom and pleasure such as I could have never imagined. Amadeo was truly my companion and also my pupil, and I forced him with gentle discipline to learn all that I thought he should know. This included his lessons in law and government, in history and philosophy, and also his lessons with me in being a blood drinker, to which he gave himself with a cheerful willingness that surpassed my dreams.
I had thought that, being young, he might want to feed on the innocent, but when I instructed him as to how guilt would soon destroy his soul if he did this, I found that he listened; and he took my instructions in how to feed upon evil without allowing it to darken his own soul.
He was also my eager pupil in the lessons on how to be in mortal company, and he soon felt strong enough to have some conversation with the mortal boys. Indeed, he was soon expert in deceiving them, just as I was, and though they sensed that something had changed with Amadeo they did not know what, and they could not know, and they dared not risk the peace of our wondrous house with even their slightest doubts.
Even Riccardo, the eldest of my apprentices, suspected nothing really, except that his Master was somehow a powerful magician and the magic had saved Amadeo's life.
But now we had to deal with our beloved Bianca, whom we had riot seen since the night of the terrible illness, and I knew that this would be Amadeo's most arduous trial.
What was she to make of Amadeo's swift recovery from his terrible battle with Lord Harlech, and what did she think when she laid eyes upon Amadeo with his luminous skin and shimmering hair? What was he to think when he looked into her eyes?
It was no secret to me that he adored her, indeed, that he had loved her as I had loved her. And so we must go to her. Indeed, we had put it off for too long.
Abruptly one evening, we went to visit her, having fed well on dais night so that we might feel and appear quite warm.
As soon as we came into her room, I saw immediately the strain in Amadeo, that he could not tell her of what had happened to him, and only in that moment did I realize how difficult this secrecy was for him, and how in spite of all his strength, he was still quite young and even weak.
Indeed, Amadeo's frame of mind was far greater cause for alarm than that of Bianca, who seemed only happy to see Amadeo restored.
They were like a brother and sister together, and I thought of course of the vow I had extracted from him when I made him, and I wished I could take him aside and remind him of it now. But we were in her drawing room and there were many other visitors, with all the usual music and talk going on.
"Come into my bedroom," she said to both of us. Her lovely oval face was beaming. "I am so very glad to see you. Why didn't you come before now? Of course everyone in Venice knew that Amadeo was recovered, and that Lord Harlech had gone back to England, but you should have written to me if you couldn't come. "
I showered her with my apologies. It was my thoughtlessness. And indeed I should have written a letter. What had blinded me on such a score was my love for Amadeo. I had cared for nothing else.
"Oh, I forgive you, Marius," she declared. "I would forgive you anything, and look at Amadeo. It's as if he were never sick at all. "
Gratefully I accepted her embrace, but I could see how Amadeo suffered when she kissed him, when she clasped his hand. He could not endure the gulf which separated them, but he must endure it, and so I did not move to leave.
"How goes it with you, my beautiful nurse," I said to her, "you who kept Amadeo by a thread until I could come to him. You and your kinsmen? Are you a happy lot? "
She gave a soft gentle laugh. "Oh, yes, my kinsmen, some of them have met with the most unfortunate end. Indeed, it is my understanding that the Grand Council of Venice believes they were murdered by those from whom they exacted heavy payments. My kinsmen should have never come to Venice with their evil designs. But I am blameless as everyone knows. Members of the Grand Council of Venice have told me as much. And you would not think it but I am now richer on account of all this. "
Of course I saw it in a moment. Those who had owed money to her miserable kinsmen had, after their murders, given her costly gifts. She was richer than she had ever been.
"I am a happier woman," she said softly, looking at me. "Indeed, I am someone altogether different, for I know a freedom now that was inconceivable before. "
Hungrily her eyes moved over me and over Amadeo. I felt a desire emanating from her. I felt it as she looked at both of us, that she wanted a new familiarity, and then she came to me, and putting her arms around me, she kissed me.
Quickly, I held her back and away from me, but this only impelled her to embrace Amadeo, and she kissed him on his cheeks and on his mouth.
She gestured towards the bed.
"All of Venice wonders about my magician and his apprentice," she said warmly. "And they come to me, only to me. "
With my eyes, I let her know my love for her, that I would trespass now if she didn't strictly forbid it, and moving past her, I seated myself on her bed.
Never had I taken such a liberty with her, but I knew her thoughts. We dazzled her. She idolized us.
And how lovely she was in her luminous silk and jewels.
She came and took her place beside me, nestled close, and unafraid of whatever she saw when she looked into my eyes.
Amadeo was astonished and soon sat beside her on her right. Though he'd fed well, I could sense his blood hunger, and that he fought bravely to keep it down.
"Let me kiss you, my exquisite one," I said. And I did so, counting upon the dim light and my sweet words to bedazzle her, and then of course she saw what she wanted to see¡ªnot some dreadful thing quite beyond her comprehension, but a mysterious man who had rendered her an invaluable service and left her wealthy and free.
"You will be safe always, Bianca," I said to her. "As long as I am here. " Twice and once more I kissed her. "Help me open my house again, Bianca, with even more splendid food and entertainments. Help me prepare a greater feast perhaps than Venice has ever seen. We'll have wondrous theatricals and dancing. Help me fill my many rooms. "
"Yes, Marius, I shall do it," she answered drowsily, her head leaning against me. "I shall be so happy. "
"I shall give you all the money you require for it. And Vincenzo will carry out your instructions. Only tell me when you would have this take place. "
I looked into her eyes as I spoke and then I kissed her, and though I did not dare to give her the smallest taste of my blood, I breathed my cold breath into her, and I pierced her mind with my desire.
Meantime, with my right hand I reached beneath her skirts and found her sweet naked secrets and easily moved them with my fingers, which inflamed her with immediate and undisguised desire.
Amadeo was confused.
"Kiss her," I whispered. "Kiss her again. "
He obeyed me, and soon had her ravished with his kisses.
And as my fingers tightened and caressed her, as his kisses grew more fervent, she grew bloodred with her cresting passion and fell softly against Amadeo's arm.
I withdrew, kissing her forehead as though she were chaste again.
"Rest now," I said, "and remember you are safe from those evil kinsmen, and that I am in your debt forever because you kept Amadeo alive until I could come. "
"Did I, Marius?" she asked me. "Wasn't it his strange dreams?" She turned to Amadeo. "Again and again you spoke of wondrous places, of those who told you that you must return to us. "
"Those were but memories caught in a web with fear," said Amadeo softly. "For long before I was born again in Venice, I knew a harsh and pitiless life. It was you who brought me back from some thick margin of consciousness which lies just this side of death,"
She gazed at him, wondering,
How he was suffering that he could not tell her what he was.
But having accepted these words from him, she allowed us to, in t
he manner of common attendants, help her with her disheveled dress and hair.
"We'll leave you now," I said, "and of the feast we'll make our plans at once. Allow me to send Vincenzo to you. "
"Yes, and on that night I promise you," she said, "your house will be more splendid than even the Doge's palace, you will see. "
"My princess," I said as I kissed her.
Back to her guests she went, and off we hurried down the stairs.
In the gondola, Amadeo began his entreaties.
"Marius, I can't bear it, this separation from her, that we can't tell her. "
"Amadeo, say nothing more to me of this!" I cautioned.
When we reached the bedchamber and locked the door, he gave way to terrible tears.
"Master, I could tell her nothing of what had happened to me! And to Bianca I would always tell all. Oh, not the secrets of you and me or the Blood Kisses, no, but of other things. How often I sat with her, and talked with her. Master, I went to her so often by day and you didn't know it. She was my friend. Master, this is unendurable. Master, she was my sister. " He sobbed like a small boy.
"I cautioned you on this, did I not?" I said furiously. "And now you weep like a child?"
In a rage, I slapped him.
And in shock he fell back away from me, but his tears flowed all the more
"Master, why can we not make her one of us! Why can we not share the Blood with her?"
I took him roughly by the shoulders. He didn't fear my hands. He didn't care.
"Amadeo, listen to me. We cannot give way to this desire. I have lived a thousand years and more without making a blood drinker, and now you, within months of your own transformation, would make the first mortal for whom you feel inordinate love?"
He was crying bitterly. He tried to free himself from me, but I would not allow it.
"I wanted so to tell her of the things I see with these new eyes!" he whispered. The blood tears spilled down his boyish cheeks. "I wanted so to tell her how all the world is changed. "
"Amadeo, know the value of what you possess and the price of what you give. Two years I prepared you for the Blood, and even so the giving of it was too rapid, spurred on by Lord Harlech's poisoned blade. Now you would visit this power upon Bianca? Why? Because you would have her know what has befallen you?"
I released him. I let him fall on his knees beside the bed, spilling his tears as he cried.
I sat at the desk.
"How long do you think I've wandered this Earth?" I asked. "Do you know how many times it had crossed my mind in carelessness and wanton temper to make another blood drinker? But I did not do it, Amadeo. Not until my eyes fell upon you. I tell you, Bianca is not to be what we are. "
"She'll grow old and die!" he whispered. His shoulders moved with his sobs. "Are we to see it? Are we to watch this happen? And what will she think of us as the years pass?"
"Amadeo, stop with this. You cannot make all of them what we are. You cannot make one after another without conscience or imagination. You cannot! For everyone there must be preparation, learning, discipline. For everyone there must be care. "
Finally he dried his tears. He stood up and he turned to face me. There seemed an awful calm in him, an unhappy and grim calm.
And then there came a solemn question from his lips.
"Why did you choose me, Master?" he asked.
I was frightened at this question, and I think he saw it before I could hide it. And I marveled that I had been so unprepared to answer such a thing.
I felt no tenderness for him suddenly, for he seemed so strong as he stood there, so very certain of himself and of the question which he had just put to me.
"Did you not ask me for the Blood, Amadeo?" I responded, my voice cool. I was trembling. How deeply I loved him, and how I didn't want him to know.
"Oh, yes, sir," he responded in a small, calm voice, "indeed I did ask you but that was after many a taste of your power, was it not?" He paused, then continued. "Why did you choose me for those kisses? Why did you choose me for the final gift?"
"I loved you," I said without further ado.
He shook his head.
"I think there's more to it," he answered.
"Then be my teacher," I answered.
He came closer to me, and looked down at me as I remained seated at my desk.
"There's a bitter cold in me," he said, "a cold which comes from a distant land. And nothing ever really makes it warm. Even the Blood did not make it warm. You knew of this cold. You tried a thousand times to melt it, and transform it to something more brilliant, but you never succeeded. And then on the night that I came near to death¡ªno, was, in fact, dying¡ªyou counted upon that cold to give me the stamina for the Blood. "
I nodded. I looked away, but he put his hand on my shoulder.
"Look at me, please, sir," he said. "Isn't it so?" His face was serene.
"Yes," I said, "it's so. "
"Why do you shrink from me as I ask this question?" he pressed.
"Amadeo," I said, speaking firmly, "is this a curse, this Blood?"
"No," he answered quickly.
"Think on it before you answer. Is it a curse!" I declared.
"No," he said again.
"Then cease your questions. Don't seek to anger me or embitter me. Let me teach you what I have to teach. "
He had lost this little battle and he walked away from me, looking once more like the child, though his full seventeen years as a mortal had rendered him more than that.
He climbed upon the bed, and curled his legs beneath him, sitting there motionless in the alcove of red taffeta and red light.
"Take me back to my home, Master," he said. "Take me back to Russia where I was born. You can take me there, I know you can. You have that power. You can find the place. "
"Why, Amadeo?"
"I must see it to forget it. I must know for certain that it was . . . what it was. "
J thought on this for a long time before I answered.
"Very well. You will tell me all you remember and I will take you where you want to go. And into the hands of your human family you can place whatever wealth you wish. "
He said nothing to this.
"But our secrets will be kept from them, as our secrets are kept from everyone. "
He nodded.
"And then we shall return. "
Again he nodded.
"All this will happen after the great feast that Bianca will start preparing. On that night, here, we will dance with our invited guests.
Over and over again, you will dance with Bianca. We will use our greatest skill to pass among our guests as human. And I shall count upon you as much as I count upon Bianca or Vincenzo. And the feast will leave all of Venice in awe. "
A faint smile came over his face. Again he nodded.
"Now you know what I want of you," I declared. "I want that you befriend the boys all the more lovingly. And I want that you go to Bianca all the more often, after you've fed of course, and your skin is ruddy, and that you tell her nothing, nothing of the magic by which you were saved. "
He nodded.
"I thought. . . " he whispered.
"You thought? "I asked.
"I thought if I had the Blood I would have all things," he said. "And now I know that it's not so. "
