by Lauren Smith
“I’m coping, barely.” Her mother had cut and run on her and her dad so long ago that she didn’t know how to have a bigger family. “What about you?” she asked. Tristan had always been cool, calm, and collected, almost satirical in his approach to their parents, but he had to be hurting like she was.
For a brief instant, that wall of imperial control descended on his face, but then he softened. “Mum and I…aren’t used to sharing each other. I’ve been the man of the house for a long time, and it’s been disconcerting to relinquish most of that control to your father.”
“It’s definitely not easy to share a parent when you haven’t had to before.” She snuggled close again. “At least we have each other.” The words slipped out before she could stop them.
Tristan made a soft dark noise and leaned down to kiss her hard, in an almost punishing manner, before he spoke. “We do have each other, and you can’t ever leave me again. Do you understand?”
She took in his face, the panic in his eyes and the tension bracketing his mouth. He’d been wounded when she’d called off their relationship. It seemed ironic that she’d gone into this thinking she’d be the one to get hurt, but instead she was the one causing him pain.
“I understand. I’m sorry, Tristan.” The words caught in her throat and choked her.
He brushed at her cheeks, and she blushed when his fingertips came away wet with tears. Tristan made a teasing tsk noise before pressing another fervent kiss to her lips.
“So you and Mum will go shopping. What am I supposed to do while you’re gone?”
She rolled one shoulder in a small shrug. “Bond with my dad?”
His rich laugh warmed her. “Not bloody likely, darling.” He was still shaking his head with apparent amusement. “I’ll plan something so you and I might have time alone later. How does that sound?”
Pretending to think about it for a minute, she finally nodded and then flashed him a grin. “Sounds nice.”
“Excellent.” He stole one more quick kiss before he slipped out of her bedroom.
That was the most important thing. Not getting caught together by their parents. Stepsiblings shouldn’t be seen making out, and they definitely should not be having hot sex with each other…and she and Tristan had done both.
Dad would kill us if he found out…
Chapter 2
A few minutes after Tristan left her room, Kat did the same. She could hear Tristan’s voice echo up from the stairs. It sounded like he was talking to her father. She heard the word Super Bowl and rolled her eyes.
Her father was a football junkie. No one would know it to look at him; he was a polished, well-dressed investment banker, but when it came to football, he was one step away from painting his face and waving a giant foam finger.
Lizzy met her at the bottom of the stairs, smiling warmly. “The boys are occupied with sports, so we can make our escape.”
“I’m ready to take on the last-minute Christmas shopping,” she said, grinning as she followed Lizzy out the door.
Tristan’s mother smiled back. “Me too. Let’s hope the crowds aren’t too terrible.”
A black Porsche SUV was parked outside, and a driver in a black uniform opened the door as they walked down the slick sidewalk. They climbed into the car and buckled up.
“Where to, Ms. Harlow?” the driver asked as he started the car.
“Paul, take us to Harrods. We’re on the hunt for an Aspinal of London briefcase.”
The driver glanced at them through the rearview mirror. He was a ruddy-cheeked man who smiled at her. “Of course, my lady.”
Lizzy settled her purse on her lap and glanced in Kat’s direction as she tugged her black leather gloves off and slipped them into her purse.
For several long minutes neither of them spoke, but Kat couldn’t stand the silence. “So, Lizzy…” She cleared her throat. “You need to do some last-minute shopping, too?”
Lizzy smiled. “Yes. I was hoping you might weigh in on a briefcase for your father. I noticed his is a little worse for wear. I was thinking of getting him a new one.” She waited for Kat to respond, but the Porsche came to a halt in front of Harrods.
“Oh my…” Lizzy put one hand to her breast as she peered out the window at something.
“What?” Kat leaned toward her, able to see the bottom half of…She sucked in a breath.
The picture of her as Snow White and Tristan as Prince Charming covered an entire side of the department store. A picture that still caused heat to rush to her face and made her light-headed all at once, because it was obvious to anyone looking at that picture that she was in love with Tristan Kingsley. Kat hoped he felt the same about her, that he loved her.
“Paul, we’ll call when we’re ready to be picked up.” Lizzy’s voice was strangely quiet.
“Very good, my lady,” Paul replied before he climbed out and opened their door.
Kat reached the sidewalk and tilted her head back to get a better glimpse of the huge ad.
“Well, that’s quite a picture.” Lizzy tugged her coat up around her neck. “I imagine it was an interesting experience to shoot.”
She nodded. “We were ambushed by the photographer and she talked us into posing for charity. So we did.” Was it pathetic to admit, even to herself, how much she loved looking at the photo? How did I fall in love with him so fast? She’d always lived her life cautiously and kept most people at a distance.
Because Tristan wouldn’t let me keep my distance. He opened me up and he opened himself up, and now look at us.
“What’s the matter, Kat?” Lizzy touched her shoulder, and she came back to herself.
“Sorry. I’m just thinking, I need to get you and Tristan both presents. I hadn’t planned for this.” Damn, that hadn’t come out right. “What I mean was, I didn’t know about you until after I’d bought my presents a month ago.” She hoped Lizzy understood what she was trying to say.
“It’s fine, Kat. None of us planned this. I need to get you a gift as well.” Lizzy smiled and squeezed Kat’s shoulder. “If you see anything you like, just give me a wink and a nudge.”
It was impossible to dislike Lizzy. Even though she was still struggling to accept the whole marriage thing, Kat couldn’t deny how much she liked the woman her father had chosen.
“Same here—for you, I mean,” she added, feeling a little shy but strangely excited. It had been so long since she’d been around a mother. Lizzy wasn’t her mother, but shopping, just the two of them for a family Christmas, might actually be fun.
“Let’s get inside. I’m thinking we should look for briefcases first.”
They entered the department store, pushing through the almost frantic crush of holiday shoppers to get to the escalators that would take them to their desired floors. Over the next hour she and Lizzy shopped, not just for the men but for each other and for themselves. They tried on fancy dresses and scarves, even oohed and ahhed over designer purses, things Kat never thought she’d do, much less enjoy doing. Yet Lizzy had coaxed her into dressing rooms and insisted she try on a dozen things just because she could.
It was fun.
Kat bought a blue linen photo album for their wedding photos and any others Lizzy might like to keep. She’d caught Lizzy admiring the album earlier and had a feeling it would be perfect.
Laden with purchases, they met Paul at the car and he dutifully relieved them of their bags and packages, stowing them methodically in the trunk.
“Where to now, Ms. Harlow?” Paul asked as he climbed into the driver’s seat.
Tapping a gloved finger against her lips, she looked at Kat. “What else do you need?”
“Something for Tristan.”
Lizzy smiled. “Well, I can certainly help you with that.”
Kat had been thinking about it all day. It had to be the right thing. Something he loved, something that he would cherish like she did the first edition of The Mysterious Island by Jules Verne he’d bought for her a few weeks before.
“I thought I might get him a map. Something old, or at least a reproduction of something old.” A map was the most logical choice. He had confessed one night in bed that he was fascinated by cartography.
She’d known that first night he’d never before opened up to anyone the way he had to her. Talk about seduction of the heart, mind, and body…
“How did you know he liked maps?” Lizzy’s question sliced through the delightful memories of Tristan’s body wrapped around hers as he’d whispered about his dreams and secret joys.
“He…uh…” Words seemed to clog her throat, unable to get free. “He told me while we were Christmas tree shopping.”
There. That sounded reasonable, didn’t it?
“He did?” Lizzy was openly staring at her now.
Great. She kept forgetting she was supposed to know less about Tristan than she actually did.
“Yeah…” She tried to think fast. “I was telling him about how I liked Russian symphonies, and he said he liked old maps.”
“I’m so glad you two are getting comfortable with each other.” Lizzy seemed to relax. “Paul, take us to Standfords in Covent Garden.”
“Yes, ma’am.” The driver pulled out into traffic.
“What’s Standfords?” Kat asked.
“A map store, among other things. They have quite the collection of rare map reproductions at good prices.”
It sounded perfect. Lizzy had to be some sort of present genius.
The car pulled up in front of a store with bright red painted doors. STANDFORDS stood out in white block letters above the entrance. The windows were brightly decorated with maps, globes, and books about exotic lands like Morocco and Egypt.
Inside the store, Lizzy and Kat wandered the aisles and perused the shelves. Light walnut wood racks had dozens of maps draped over rungs, and small can lights illuminated the endless books along the walls.
Kat trailed a fingertip over each spine of the travel guides as she walked along, not seeing anything that seemed right. She froze when she reached a shelf with navigation tools on it. She found a rosewood box containing an antique brass compass with the year 1818 engraved on the brass cover.
“That’s a lovely Brunton,” Lizzy said, joining her by the shelf, her keen eyes roving over the compass’s features.
“Do you think Tristan would like it?” She held her breath. Lizzy would tell her the truth, wouldn’t she?
“Ah, yes, I think so.” Lizzy smiled, but then she met Kat’s gaze. “Are you and Tristan bonding? I know he can be a bit wild…”
That was an understatement. Tristan was untamable, a sex god that couldn’t be ignored or resisted. Sleeping with him had pulled her apart cell by cell and put her back together. He’d changed her. Kat had fallen in love with him. Wild was definitely not the right word. He made her feel so many different things: new, exposed, and not herself.
“Tristan has been great. He’s made me feel very welcome.” Kat stroked her fingers over the brass surface of the compass.
He’d told her that he loved maps because they were like windows into the past, seeing how men and women viewed the world. A cultural memory frozen in time. Tristan had made maps seem beautiful, enchanting, and fascinating. But Kat wanted to give him something that would guide him. What good were maps if you didn’t have a tool to read them? He needed to find his way in the world, make his own path separate from his father.
“I’m glad he’s behaved himself,” Lizzy said, but her tone was still serious. “He has a difficult time ahead. Between his father and his future title, he has so much to worry about, and I fear it’s affected his relationships.” She paused.
Kat held her breath until it seemed to singe her lungs with pain.
“What I mean is that he’s not ready to settle down and date women. He’s quite a charmer, and many decent women with good heads on their shoulders still vie for his attention, but he isn’t serious about any of them. My son has left many broken hearts in his wake.” When Lizzy met Kat’s gaze, everything in Kat went still.
That sounds like a warning.
Tristan’s mother knew about them. She knew…Kat tried not to panic, not to overreact or give herself away.
Lizzy placed a hand on Kat’s wrist.
“It would be best if Clayton thought Tristan’s heartbreaker tendencies wouldn’t affect anyone he knew, especially someone he loves so very much.” She gave Kat’s now trembling hand a little pat and then tapped a finger on the compass. “You should get this for him. He doesn’t have one, and I think he’ll love it. You have an eye for beautiful things.”
Kat glanced down at the compass. God, please don’t let Lizzy change her mind and tell Dad about us…She didn’t think Lizzy would risk upsetting her father, but she wasn’t sure.
Collecting the compass, she headed to the cashier’s desk, her legs shaking a little and her blood pounding in her ears. Everything would be fine; they wouldn’t be discovered. She had to keep telling herself that and maybe she’d believe it.
Tonight they would open presents, and tomorrow was Christmas. Her first Christmas with her new family. It still hadn’t sunk in. She was part of a bigger family now, one that included a stepmother and a stepbrother. The fact that she was sleeping with her future stepbrother…well, she couldn’t let herself think about that right now.
As the man at the cash register wrapped up the compass, she noticed Lizzy talking on her phone. Her face was ashen, her grip on the phone white-knuckled.
“Please, Edward. Don’t take him from me, not tonight,” Lizzy pleaded, her head dropping and her eyes closed. Her fear turned to quiet rage as her lips thinned and her eyes narrowed. “You don’t own me anymore. I made that clear when I left. You do not get to dictate what happens to me anymore.” Lizzy’s eyes opened again, and a steel fury burned in their depths. Then she disconnected the call, her anger flowing out of her as her shoulders dropped.
“Lizzy, is everything all right?” Kat collected her bag and joined Tristan’s mother by the shop’s entrance.
Slipping her phone back into her purse, Lizzy massaged her eyes and attempted to smile. “Tristan’s father thinks he can stop me from marrying your father. He’s threatened to keep my son away from me.”
“But Tristan’s not a child. It’s not like you’d have a custody battle. He’s twenty-five.”
Lizzy shook her head. “It’s complicated. Oh, I wish sometimes I’d never married Edward, but then”—she paused and a true smile lit her face—“I see my son, and I would endure that heartache all over again. That’s why I named him Tristan.”
“What do you mean?” Kat focused on Lizzy’s eyes, hating the hurt she saw in the other woman’s gaze.
“I didn’t know when I married Edward that he was in love with someone else. I was…” Lizzy struggled for words. “A replacement for the woman he couldn’t have. I found out a few months into our marriage, before I discovered I was pregnant. I was so happy in so many ways, but I knew I’d never win Edward’s heart. Tristan was a child made from that grief. The name Tristan is French for sadness.”
All around them the store was filled with customers, but Kat didn’t notice them as she listened to Lizzy talk about something so intimate and personal.
“You named him?”
Lizzy nodded. “Edward wanted a family name, but I won that battle. I stayed with Edward as long as I could to give Tristan as normal a life as I could manage. That’s what being a parent is. Making sacrifices to give the best to your child. It’s instinct—it’s love.”
Kat’s throat constricted and her eyes stung. Her mother hadn’t felt that way about her. If she had…
She wouldn’t have abandoned me and Dad.
“Kat?” Lizzy’s hand clasped one of hers and squeezed. “I’m sorry if I upset you. I shouldn’t have burdened you with these things.”
“No—no, it’s not that,” Kat whispered. “I was just thinking how lucky Tristan is to have you. My mother…” A lump formed in her throat, choking anythi
ng else she might’ve said. But Lizzy was too perceptive.
“I imagine Tristan would feel the same way about you and your father. Clayton is wonderful, nothing like Edward.” A rueful little smile curved her lips. “He’s the kind of man I ought to have married. I’m glad to have the chance now.” A delicate blush pinkened Lizzy’s cheeks. “I hope Clayton and Tristan grow close someday. It would do Tristan some good to get to know a man who isn’t driven by greed and ambition.”
“Have you and Dad set a date for the wedding?” Kat asked.
“Not yet. I’m not sure I want a big wedding, so if your father doesn’t want a big one either, we might be able to get married soon. We could even forgo the church and do a civil ceremony.”
“You don’t want a big wedding?”
Lizzy smiled softly. “No. Marrying your father is what matters. I don’t care how it comes about, whether in a church and a white gown, or a simple wedding with just witnesses at the Mayor’s Parlour.”
Kat suddenly gasped when an idea struck her. “Lizzy, why don’t you and Dad just get married today? You can, can’t you?” In the short time she’d been around Lizzy, she had to admit the woman was good for her father. She laughed at his silly jokes, and the way she leaned in to him when they hugged and how he beamed down at her…There was true affection there, and her father had lost his tired, haggard look. Her dad was happy. What was the point in delaying?
Lizzy nibbled her lip, and then with a tentative smile, she looked at Kat. “Do you think your father would…? I mean, would he miss the fanfare of an official church wedding?”
Kat shook her head. “No, he wouldn’t.” She knew her dad well enough to know all that would matter was that he married Lizzy, and that Kat was there.
“Well, then, I suppose I ought to call him.” With another girlish blush, Lizzy dialed Clayton.
Kat stepped toward the waiting car to give her some privacy, and she pulled out her own phone. After removing her gloves and stuffing them into her pockets, she texted Tristan.
