Blissful Agony

by Rivers, Brandy L

Knowing worse pain was coming, she stared up at him stoically. A part of her learned to accept his vow to never touch her as a woman, even silently thank him for sparing her. Though another side desperately wanted to seal the bond.

  At the moment, Ava wanted to escape, but feared his wrath. Instead, she endured, doing everything he expected, no matter how much she hated herself for it afterward.

  Axel wrapped the other hand around the twisted shard of metal and yanked it free. Blood filled her chest when the artery was ripped open again. Her bones shifted, her body healing. She mourned her lost chance at death. At freedom.

  “Change now!” his voice battered her, pushing her beast to the surface. She rolled to her stomach, the howl ripping from her lips as the pain faded, her body mended in seconds.

  She’d live. But would Axel blame her? She was supposed to bring Clint back. The boy certainly had grown a set of balls. He shifted to half-man, which meant he was naturally dominant. Stronger than any of Axel’s other wolves. Maybe stronger than Axel himself.

  “Change back.” The command wasn’t as harsh.

  Her body reformed into her human shape. The pain faded.

  Axel gripped her hair, yanking her head up. “What happened?”

  “He’s not the same subservient boy I changed. He completely resisted my command. Tried to kill me. I don’t believe we can break him.”

  “Then we need to realign him with our pack. How hard can that be?”

  She kept the snort from her lips. “You’re going to challenge Slater for Clint?”

  “That’s my last option. First, I’d rather prove he’s a monster and bring him crawling back. If that fails, I’ll challenge Slater.”

  “Why? Neither Clint nor Slater has ever made a move to attack us. Is the risk necessary to bring one wolf back to the fold?”

  “After he saw your face, it is. His pack will come for us. And you saw what happened to Jones and Mena thanks to the Edenton wolves.”

  “You sent me after him,” she hissed.

  “Why do you think you haven’t been strung up by your ankles and left for the enforcers to beat?”

  A favorite of his punishments. She’d earned his wrath once, and the lesson had stayed with her.

  He smirked. “I may finally have a use for the girl. First, we need to know Clint’s habits. Whom should we send?”

  Her mouth twisted. “Send Elias. He’s just a boy.” She couldn’t imagine what plan brewed in Axel’s head, but was willing to bet it involved sending Clint’s worst memory to Edenton.

  * * * *

  Robert sat at a table with Liz and Tremaine. In 2 Deep was busy, but not so crowded that he couldn’t keep an eye on his sister. Emily smiled, and appeared to be flirting with Clint.

  Liz leaned over with a devilish grin. “Thought you trusted him.”

  “She’s my little sister, and I didn’t do enough to protect her in the past. Of course I’m wary.”

  Tremaine reached over to squeeze his hand. “Can’t blame yourself for not knowing. No one did. If we had, we would’ve stopped him. Your parents, me, you, Liz, and others. We didn’t know.”

  “True.” Robert ran his hands down his lapels. “Clint is worried about his old pack being a threat, but I told him we’d keep an eye on her. I’m hoping he convinces her to stay at his place. She’ll be closer.”

  Liz’s eyes popped wide. “You’re trying to get them together-together?”

  He nodded. “He wouldn’t hurt her, right?”

  She laughed, shaking her head. “No, but he may beg her to hurt him.”

  Robert’s eyes squeezed shut as his head jerked to the side. “That’s enough. I don’t want to hear about what happened while you weren’t with us. And I really don’t want to know what my sister might try, or like.” He shuddered. “As long as I know he won’t ever force anything on her, I’m fine.”

  “He won’t. He might like some kink, but I think Clint is the man to help her heal. What James did—well, Clint is completely opposite. She might need the other end of the spectrum to make herself whole.”

  “I hope so. She opens up with him. She smiles. I want her to be happy.”

  Tremaine looked over and smiled. “Safe to say she is. Now stop staring, and let them be.”

  He nodded. “Preston and I did some digging. Elm Wood Pack needs to be put down. At least their alpha, his second, and the enforcers. We need to figure out who was involved in the abuse and end it.”

  Tremaine’s eyes narrowed. “Thought they disappeared. We closed that case thirteen years ago. No one could find a single trace of those sick fuckers.”

  “Apparently they’ve come out of hiding. At least the second. Ava Fang tracked down Clint. She plowed her Humvee into Emily’s BMW. Clint carried Emily away before the vehicles blew. We found a smoking mess when we arrived.”

  “Why didn’t you tell us?” Liz demanded.

  “When? Ten minutes ago when I got here?” Robert smiled at her. “I was working. I told you as soon as I could.”

  “Mmm, does that mean we have to stay here and watch them all night? Or do I get to take my men home soon?” Liz asked with a seductive smile.

  “Needed to make sure their evening at least started well,” Robert offered with a shrug. “I’ve seen. Slater’s people are providing security. We can go.”

  Tremaine chuckled. “Wise choice. We don’t want to make them nervous. Clint keeps glancing over here like he expects you to crash their date.”

  * * * *

  Emily looked over at the table where her brother, Liz, and Tremaine had been moments ago. Relief eased through her now that her chaperones had left.

  She giggled softly and made a decision. Tired of losing at pool, she wanted to leave, as long as her time with Clint wasn’t over. She planned to try something she hadn’t ever done in a way that counted.

  “Um, think we could take off?” she asked timidly.

  Clint held out his hand. “May I?” With his other hand, he held up his pool stick and nodded to the rack.

  She handed the cue stick over and he put them both back before offering his elbow. Smiling, she threaded her arm through his.

  “One thing.” He sucked in a breath and looked over. “Robert thought it might be wise for you to stay at my place. There’s a guest room. This isn’t a move to get in your pants. But he thought you being across the street from him would be safest, and he claims he trusts me.”

  “He does,” Emily promised. Robert had sent her a few texts, mentioning she should stay with Clint. She agreed a hundred percent. As long as he wanted her there. His nervousness was sweet, cute even.

  He snorted. “Yeah, that’s why he watched me like a hawk earlier.”

  A smirk lifted a single corner of her lips. “He’s not here now.”

  “True.”

  “I’ll stay. Mostly because I don’t want our night to end. I didn’t mind losing at first. But four games later? I’m done now.”

  “I could give you a few pointers.”

  “Another night.” She stepped outside and looked up at the stars. “Right now, I want to have you alone.”

  He licked his lips, nodding. “We need to get your stuff first, huh?”

  “Probably a good idea. I can run up and be back in minutes.”

  “I’ll go with you, just in case. Even though you’re not the target, which is why I don’t understand how Robert thinks my place is safest.”

  She had an idea it was more than that. “My place isn’t warded. It doesn’t have my brother across the street. Nor does it have Liz and Tremaine close by. So yeah, your home is better than my apartment.”

  “You trust me?”

  “I do.”

  He opened the car door for her, and she slipped in with a smile. “Thank you.”

  “Like me opening the door?”

  She nodded and looked up through her lashes at him. “You don’t make me feel inferior when you do it.”

  “You aren’t inferior. My hesitation earlier had everything to
do with not wanting to control you.”

  “Would you stop worrying about that, Clint? I’m an adult and I’ve learned to use my voice. I’ll tell you if I’m uncomfortable.”

  His eyes lit up as he shut the door and hurried around the car.

  Emily felt light, and ready to explore new boundaries. Her fear had completely evaporated, and Clint had let go of his worries. For the moment.

  Chapter 5

  Excitement danced through Clint as if he were a damned teenager on his first date. And he supposed he was, in a way. He’d never really done the dating thing. Usually it was meet at a bar, take her home, and fuck. Sometimes he went back for seconds, and in a few cases more—when it worked for both parties.

  With the exception of his high school sweetheart, he’d never tried a legitimate relationship. If that hadn’t ended in tragedy, he might not be the fucked up mess he’d become.

  Emily had been through hell, much like him. Their situations were different, but close enough. He didn’t need to know the details. He’d listen, but would always accept her as is.

  He let them into his house and followed her in. She dropped her bag next to the couch and walked toward him, her eyes on his mouth.

  Heart pounding, he dropped his keys on the table and let his arms fall to his sides.

  Her hands landed on his chest as she leaned up, brushing her lips over his. A groan escaped as he tilted his head to give her better access.

  Emily’s eyes closed as she pushed him back, following until she was pressed against him. Her tongue darted out, licking the seam of his lips and he opened, granting her access as one delicate hand drifted up, around the back of his neck.

  When her taste burst across his tongue, he kissed back slowly, tentative, letting her have the lead.

  His cock hardened, and he held his hips still, praying she wouldn’t notice, or at least not freak.

  She pressed tighter with a hungry moan, her hand gripping as she kissed him deeply. Her other fingers trailed down his stomach, tracing each ridge, then over his erection. Her hand covered him, squeezing.

  Letting his head fall back, he broke the kiss as he panted for air. It was all he could do to not thrust into her palm.

  Startled, she stepped back, her eyes drifting to what she’d been touching seconds ago. “Sorry. Not ready for that. I’m sorry,” she pleaded, panic lacing her tone.

  He held his hands up in surrender. “Don’t apologize. I told you, we’ll go at your pace.”

  “Did I do it right?” she whispered, her terror-filled eyes bouncing to his.

  His head tilted slightly. “Do what right, Em?”

  “Kiss you. You didn’t reach out, didn’t touch me.” She swallowed and looked away as her shoulders slumped. “I did it wrong, didn’t I?”

  His heart wrenched. “Oh, sweetheart, you did it right. I don’t know your boundaries, so I played it safe. I’ve seen you wince away from anyone who tries to touch you. And you said you needed control, which I gladly gave.”

  Her eyes locked on his, relief replacing the terror. “Promise?”

  He nodded. “I won’t ever lie to you.”

  “I shouldn’t have grabbed you.”

  A wry smile lifted his lips. “Oh, I don’t mind at all. You can touch whenever and whatever you want. When you’re ready.”

  She shook her head with wide eyes. “Not ready. I shouldn’t have.”

  “Shh, don’t. We’ll figure out the boundaries as they come.”

  Emily slowly met his eyes. Her shoulders relaxed, and she closed the distance, putting her head on his chest while circling her arms around his waist.

  “Tell me if this is too much,” he murmured against her hair as he gently wrapped his arms around her.

  “Exactly what I need,” she ensured. “You aren’t disappointed?”

  “Never.”

  “It’s still there.” She looked up with a single raised brow.

  He shrugged. “I’m a guy. I’m attracted to you. If you kiss me, that’s going to happen. It will go away.”

  She laughed softly, nuzzling her face in the crook of his neck. “You smell wonderful.”

  He breathed her in, her jasmine scent refreshing. “You do too.”

  “Can we watch something?”

  “Anything you want. You can have the remote.”

  She leaned back, really smiling now. “Soon. I want you, but I’m scared.”

  He nodded. “I’ll wait forever. I don’t want you to fear me.”

  “Thank you.”

  He nodded. “Come on, let’s sit. If you’d like to be close, I’m happy to hold you, or let you snuggle.”

  “I’d like that.”

  * * * *

  Panic shot through Jess. A familiar vision blocked out her surroundings, but this time there was a sense of urgency. A kid rolled on the street as a car raced off.

  She ran outside in time for the door of some hotrod to fly open, a kid was shoved to the pavement, then it burned rubber.

  Jess hurried to the street and dropped to her knees beside the boy. He wasn’t even a teenager. Scrawny, scraped-up, and bruised.

  “Hey,” she cooed. “What’s your name?” She already knew. She’d seen this, and other visions of the boy, many times over the last few months.

  His deep blue eyes darted around as he pushed himself to his hands and knees. “Who are you?”

  “Jess. And you?”

  His brow wrinkled. “Elias. Whe-where am I?”

  “Edenton. Why don’t you come inside? Then we can figure out why you were tossed from a moving vehicle.”

  Shaking his head, he looked to the woods. He rubbed his shaggy brown hair and frowned as he glanced back at her.

  “Oh, no. You aren’t running. I have a warm meal and something cold to drink. Nothing will harm you here.”

  “Promise?” he whimpered, and her heart broke again.

  “You have my word.” She stood and offered her hand.

  His palm had been scratched to hell, the back of his hand bruised, but he clung to her with strength. Images came to her, of him helping Slater in the shed while wearing a big, dopey grin. Him curling up on the couch beside her to watch movies. This child was meant to be with them.

  Jess gingerly pulled him to a stand. “How bad you hurt?” she asked, mostly to keep him from bolting.

  He shrugged, his head tipping to the side, but he wouldn’t meet her gaze.

  “Come on, Elias. Let’s get you taken care of.”

  Slater stood on the porch with a look of concern. He didn’t approach as Jess led the boy inside.

  “You okay, son?” Slater asked, with a soft smile.

  The kid dipped his chin, and Jess tipped her head toward the kid.

  Slater’s expression relaxed, warmth in his eyes.

  “Go on and clean up.” Jess opened the bathroom door and waited until Elias stepped inside.

  His voice was timid. “I’ll be a minute.”

  “Don’t rush.”

  As soon as the door shut, she caught Slater’s arm and dragged him to the far corner of the living room. “We’re keeping him here. He needs a home,” she said in an urgent whisper.

  Slater looked to the bathroom. “Based on his scent, I’m betting he’s from the Elm Wood Pack. He might look like a boy, but he may not be.”

  “He’s a boy, and he’s been hurt too much already in his young life. He needs a home. We have room.”

  “You’ve seen him, haven’t you?”

  “Elias needs us. He’s supposed to be here. We can protect him, make him happy.”

  His brow arched. “You want to keep him, permanently?”

  She nodded. “Come on, Babe. You saw him. He’s so young and has never had a break. Let’s give him one.”

  “We can try. What if he doesn’t accept us?”

  She crossed her arms over her chest, thrusting her hip out as she glared up at him. “You don’t think I can convince a kid we’re better than a pack who beats him? His father did the same
damned thing. That’s why he wound up with those fuckers.”

  Slater kissed her quickly, then turned her with a gentle push toward the kitchen. “Go on. Fix his meal. I’ll make up the guest room.”

  * * * *

  After watching Say Anything, Emily yawned, and turned to look up at Clint who’d sat with his arm around her the entire movie. He watched her with the warm smile that always made heat pool in her belly.

  Licking her lips, she got lost in his eyes. Soft green like new leaves. No demand, no irritation at her accidental teasing. Curiosity had gotten the better of her. James had used his penis as a weapon. Clint made no move to stop her, and didn’t force her into more than she was ready for.

  Her heartbeat sped as she leaned in, testing her newfound confidence and his self-control.

  She pressed her lips to his and he relaxed under her, not moving his hands. Part of her worried she was doing it wrong, but she reminded herself he’d promised to let her lead. His restraint was both a balm and a curiosity to her.

  As soon as her tongue touched his lips, he opened with a groan. She craved his minty-salty taste. His mouth was warm, gentle, and inviting.

  Sitting back, she caught her breath. Random questions filtered through her mind. Emily wasn’t sure where to start.

  “Talk to me,” he pleaded, peering into her eyes. “Tell me what you want.”

  “Do you like to touch?”

  A wicked smile broke across his lips. “If you tell me what you want, I’ll do whatever pleases you.”

  “Really?” she whispered.

  He nodded. “Your soft skin calls to my fingers, but I never want to scare you. Until you give me permission, I won’t lay a hand on you. I don’t want you to get lost in memories and confuse me with the one who hurt you.”

  She took a deep breath and blurted out the things that frightened her the most. “You can’t grab me. I can’t handle it if you’re behind me. I need to see what you’re doing. Never want to be pinned or caged. Can’t be held down.” Tears leaked as her eyes closed.