Blissful Agony

by Rivers, Brandy L

  “No. Not ruined. If tears help you heal, it’s perfect.”

  He stroked her back in soft waves. Her heart calmed, as did her breaths. Clint rolled to his back as she curled closer, putting her head on his shoulder.

  He never said a word, but offered comfort she never knew she needed. Her eyes drifted closed as she relaxed into sleep.

  * * * *

  Clint couldn’t imagine being so terrified of sex he wouldn’t even pleasure himself. He wanted to cry for her, but remained stoic, ready to listen if she needed to talk. To hold her if she needed to cry.

  Part of him wanted to ask questions, dive into her past, to understand all she went through. The other part knew talking when you weren’t ready could do more harm than help.

  He smiled as she nuzzled her face against his chest. He would never pry. She’d been victimized by family and now had a serious distrust of all men—except apparently him.

  Early on, his goals became keeping her trust and washing away the horror she’d been through. He wanted her to understand how special she was. Beautiful, especially when she smiled. Funny after she opened up. Captivating. He’d made it a point to show up if he knew where she might be so he could steal a few moments of her time, and enjoy her company. Jess often helped with suggestions of where to be and when.

  Never had he been so patient, but for Emily, he would wait forever. No one else existed when she smiled at him.

  The phone buzzed in his pocket. It could be Slater, or one of the other enforcers.

  Robert. Drawing a breath, he unlocked the phone to read the text.

  Is she okay? It’s too quiet over there.

  He sent a quick reply. She’s napping. I’ll call if she needs anything.

  Take care of her.

  He set his phone aside and rubbed his face with a heavy sigh. He was positive getting Emily off wasn’t what her brother meant.

  Emily shifted, her leg curling over his as she rubbed against him, her thigh trapping his straining cock.

  Fuck, she might kill me after all.

  Her fingers traced over the dragon that started on his back but wrapped around his ribs, its head on his pectoral. “It’s beautiful,” she whispered, leaning up to meet his gaze.

  He smiled. “Fallon did it.”

  Her fingers trailed down his ribs. “I heard this was the most painful place to get ink.”

  A chuckle escaped. “Maybe why I enjoyed that part.”

  “And these?” She tugged one of the nipple rings.

  Sucking in a breath, he nodded. “Like them pulled.”

  She did it again and smirked. “Like that?”

  He groaned. “Exactly.”

  Her finger traced over the scar on his right pectoral. “What happened here?”

  “Shot with a silver bullet. Went straight through by some miracle. The exit scar is on my back.”

  Her head tipped to the side as she chewed her lip. Her brow furrowed. “You rub there when you’re worrying about something, or thinking too hard about my reaction.”

  He sighed. “Axel shot me after forcing me to destroy the only person I cared about in the whole world.”

  “You seem to care about a lot of people now.”

  He nodded. “Everything’s changed. I care about my friends, my pack, this town, but most of all you. From the moment I met you, I wanted to make you happy.” He shrugged. “There’s this deep need to see a smile on your face. It brightens everything around you.”

  She looked into his eyes. “Thank you.”

  “For?”

  “Making me feel wanted.”

  “Trust me, Emily, I’ve wanted you since the beginning.”

  A smile quirked her lips. “Even as damaged as I was back then?”

  “I’m fucked up in my own way. I get off on pain.” He sighed, looking up at the ceiling. He’d never felt so self-conscious of his needs. Clint knew he was a work-in-progress, and hoped Emily could overlook his kinks, maybe even embrace them. It wasn’t often he had nightmares, or freaked out when with a woman, but it had happened enough he worried he might do something he’d regret.

  Emily purred, “What about pleasure? Get off on pleasure?”

  “Mmm, nearly came in my pants with you riding over me.”

  She batted her lashes, trailing her fingers along his abs. “Should have told me to keep going.”

  He caressed her face, looking deep into her brown eyes. “Wasn’t about me, Emily. Was about giving you what you need.”

  “And you aren’t upset you didn’t get a release?”

  Shaking his head, he smiled. “Worth it to see you lost in the moment.” He was ready for everything, but he’d give her exactly what she wanted, no matter how blue his balls became.

  “I want to see you lost in the moment,” she murmured. Her hand caressed further down his abdomen.

  “Won’t take much, Emily.”

  “I want you. Just you. I don’t want you tied up though.” Her fingers slipped under the waistband of his jeans, gently curling around his cock.

  He groaned low in his throat. “What do you want, Em?”

  “You.”

  “Got me. Specifics?”

  She shrugged. “Don’t know.”

  “We’ll figure it out together then.” His breath caught as she slowly stroked him.

  “So hard,” she whispered. “Yet silky.”

  He chuckled, resisting the urge to pump into her hand. “You like the way it feels?”

  She nodded as she sat up, opening his fly and tugging down his pants. “Tell me if you want me to stop.”

  He choked back a laugh at her serious tone. “Not until you need to,” he panted, as she pulled on his length. Her thumb swirled the drop of pre-come over his crown. “Em,” he breathed.

  “Like that?” she whispered.

  He nodded as he got lost in her eyes.

  “So much control. Why?”

  “Never want to frighten you.”

  “You don’t. You ready for me?”

  “Mmhmm.” As long as she was ready, and she certainly seemed so.

  She climbed off the bed, pulling her panties down before unzipping her dress, letting it fall to the floor. No bra covered the soft skin he wanted to taste. “God, you’re gorgeous, Emily.”

  Pink raced up her skin as she moved beside him.

  “Want my pants on?” he asked, trailing his eyes over her delicate body.

  She shook her head. “Off. Want to see all of you.”

  He got rid of his jeans and boxers in a hurry. Before he settled back, she threw her leg over his hip.

  A trace of concern flickered through his mind. Needing to be sure, he asked, “You know what happens when we orgasm, right?”

  “The bond?”

  He nodded.

  “Meant to be, right? Have you ever met someone who didn’t belong with their mate?”

  He shook his head. “All the mated pairs I’m aware of are with the one they were meant for.”

  “And you’ve been with women you haven’t mated. So if it’s not meant to be, it won’t happen. Right?” A frown played over her lips.

  He sat up, brushing his thumb over her bottom lip. “Do you want to be mated?”

  She nodded. “This feels right.” Emily shrugged, looking through her lashes at him. “I’ve been trying to find the courage to ask you out for months.”

  He pressed a soft kiss to her lips. “I’ve been waiting for a sign you were ready for me to ask you.”

  “I really wanted to ask myself, but fear held me back.” She batted her lashes again. “You’ve given me all the space I need, but I half-wondered if I misread you because you never push.”

  “Didn’t want you uncomfortable around me,” he admitted.

  “Never uncomfortable. Nervous sometimes, excited, and generally eager to be near you. You give me butterflies.”

  He grinned up at her. “You do the same to me, Em.”

  She ran her fingers down his erection and back up, biting down on
her plump bottom lip. “So, what do I do with this?”

  He swallowed hard, holding his length straight. “Slide down over me. Then do what feels best.”

  “You can tell me if I’m doing it wrong.”

  He gave her a smirk. “If you hurt yourself, you’re doing it wrong. If it feels good, it’s right.”

  She nodded, raising up. Her drenched heat closed over him.

  “Em, if it’s too much, you can stop.” He grunted. God, she was so fucking tight he wasn’t sure he would last.

  Determined, Emily bit her bottom lip with a moan, pushing down until he was all the way in. Her hands landed on his shoulders as her chest heaved, her perky breasts rising and falling with the motion.

  Silk walls pulsed around him with her happy sigh.

  When she didn’t move, he panted, “You okay?”

  Her eyes hooded as she rose up and slid back down with ease. Her body embraced his, squeezing him tight as she rode him slowly, leaving his body in a state of blissful agony teetering on the edge of release.

  His hands trailed up her stomach to cup her breasts. She moaned and moved faster, her breathy sighs a delight. Her pleasure scented the air, the fragrance heightening his own desire. Love swelled in his heart, watching Emily take what she wanted from him. She’d found the courage to break free of her shell.

  “So good,” she whispered. “You?”

  Good didn’t begin to cover it, but he had no words. “Mmm, yeah. I’m close.” He rolled her nipples as she rocked her hips each time she came down. “Tell me you are.”

  Her milk chocolate eyes melted to smoldering bronze and her magic broke over him like a wave of warm water. His beast made a purring sound as she connected with him.

  Their bond snapped into place. Her happiness and love flowed through him as pleasure overtook her. Emily’s magic crashed over him as her climax hit.

  “Yes,” she cried out as she collapsed on his chest. He smoothed his hands up her sides, as she nuzzled his neck. “Perfect,” she murmured.

  “Very.”

  “Was it—” she started nervously.

  Clint stole a brief kiss. “Better than anything that came before.”

  “Even without me hurting you?”

  With Emily, the need for the other stuff faded away. He still desired pain and bondage, but as long as they made love, he didn’t mind vanilla loving. “Even without that. Trust me. You are exactly what I needed.”

  * * * *

  Elated, Emily rolled to Clint’s side, pulling him with her. This was where she wanted to be. In his bed, enveloped in his arms, a part of his life.

  Then she smiled, looking deep into his spring green eyes. “I felt your wolf. I want to see what you look like in that form.”

  “The wolf?”

  “I caught a couple glimpses when you shifted and stopped Ava.”

  His brow arched, humor dancing through his eyes with a hint of worry. “Thought you were completely out?”

  She nodded slowly. “By the time you pulled me from the car, I was all the way out. I wanted to help, tried to fight my way back to the surface, but I couldn’t.” Her voice caught. “I’m sorry.”

  “Hey, don’t do that. You hit your head. I would have been out of it too, if I’d cracked the window with my noggin.” He kissed her quick and scooted off the bed.

  Clint knelt before Emily. The shift settled over him as his beast took shape.

  She moved to the end of the bed as Clint moved closer. His coat was gray and silver, his eyes copper. “I’ve never seen a more beautiful wolf.”

  He laid his head in her lap, and she rubbed behind his ears.

  “Softer than I imagined.”

  A gentle rumbling sound came from him and she smiled.

  “Gorgeous as a wolf.”

  He shifted back, his head remaining in her lap.

  She combed her fingers through his brown hair with a grin. “Sexy as a man.”

  He rose up to press a soft kiss on her lips. “Now what do you want to do?”

  She let out a yawn. “Hold you. Maybe tomorrow, before I check in at the clinic, I can go to the gym with you and you can get back to sparring.”

  “I can hold you all night, if you’d like.”

  “I would.”

  Chapter 9

  “Why haven’t we found the boy?” Axel snarled as Ava walked in.

  Ava stifled a smile, glad Elias had managed an escape. He was too young and defenseless for this life. The other two wolves who had disappeared were another story. Both had chosen to become werewolves. Much like she had.

  Still, baiting Axel was never a wise choice. She plastered on a soft expression and offered the least offensive truth she could come up with. “Perhaps you’re sending the wrong wolves to track him down. The place is heavily warded. No one is getting in. That’s why Toby shoved him out of the car instead of chaining him to a tree as ordered.” She had to give it to the mutt, he was smart.

  “They’ve turned to mages for help?” He snorted. “Such bullshit.”

  She didn’t bother to correct him. There was more than mage magic at play. She’d done her research. Between druids, mages, witches, fae, and several other magical casters, the wards would be nearly impenetrable. Axel was too simple-minded, only wanting to deal with wolves.

  Ava saw the advantages to Edenton’s alliance. But, she also believed taking HARP’s offer to make Axel a recruiter would have been wise. However, Axel proved time and time again he didn’t possess the power to lead with authority. No, he turned to fear and pain, afraid another wolf would overthrow him.

  More specifically, she now believed he refused to mate her because then he couldn’t use sex as a weapon against the women of the pack. Or maybe he was afraid Ava would challenge him? Though mating would have kept her from ever considering such a thing.

  Unfortunately, a part of her loved the twisted fuck. She had never let go of the hope she could form a mate bond with him. Perhaps then she wouldn’t live in constant fear of him lashing out at her.

  To avoid an argument, she stated facts. “They’re in a town full of Others rumored to work together. Going in after Clint won’t be as easy as taking someone off the street.”

  “He will come back to us, and then I will break the snot-nosed shit. No one walks away from my pack. That includes Elias.”

  “Of course.” Only she hoped the boy stayed far away and never looked back. Hopefully a better wolf had taken him in.

  “If we can’t get the boy back, we’ll send Gina. Clint can’t ignore his first love.” An evil glint shone in his eyes.

  A chill went down Ava’s spine. Axel had no scruples. His new plan shouldn’t have surprised her. When Gina hadn’t been his first option, she had hoped the damaged girl would be spared. Ava could hardly stomach what that poor woman had been through at Axel’s hands.

  Gina wasn’t much better than an animal at this point. She had survived, but barely. The damage to her head never healed correctly, leaving her with no voice and no fight. She fed herself, washed if taken to a bathroom, and clothed herself. When not sleeping, she stared at the wall with a haunted look on her angelic face.

  By some miracle, Gina didn’t seem to realize how bad Axel treated her. He often used the broken girl as an example of what happens when his wolves disobey. An effective tactic.

  “What are you planning, Axel?”

  “Carve the word ‘remember’ into her flesh with a silver blade. Chain her to his porch.”

  Her heart shuddered in her chest as she nodded. Arguing would earn her a beating, or worse. Disobeying would meet the same result.

  Exactly one viable option. Follow orders.

  Ava had survived three decades under his rule by being the cold, heartless bitch he expected her to be.

  “When?”

  “Give the enforcers one more day to see if they can find Elias or the other two. If not, late tomorrow, we’ll leave Clint a present.”

  * * * *

  Elias wept into his pil
low. Jess and Slater had been nothing but kind to him. He didn’t want to leave. Terror at being alone churned through him. He couldn’t survive in the human world. Edenton had accepted him. Jess claimed she wanted him to stay. Slater even seemed to welcome him.

  Fear gnawed at him. Would they send him back to Axel? To the Silver Council who was more likely to put him down than find him a home? And if they found him another home, would they treat him well?

  There was no doubt in his mind that Axel would punish him if he got his hands on Elias again. Disobeying orders, he hadn’t tried to get close to Clint after Jess and Slater took him in.

  Everything they told him about Clint had inspired hope. Something he never had much of. When Clint resisted the orders, they’d left him for dead, only he escaped. Here, in Edenton, he’d made a life for himself. Jess and Slater could help Elias the same way, if they’d take him.

  A knock on his door startled him. He buried his tear-stained face and mumbled, “Come in.”

  “Hey, you okay?” Jess asked, sitting beside him. She reached out to touch his arm.

  “Why are you so nice to me?”

  “Because no one deserves to be treated the way you have been. You’re a kid, and you should be able to enjoy your youth. We want to give you a better life.”

  “Slater too?”

  He cleared his throat from the door. “Yes, especially me. Say the words and you can stay here as long as you want. We’ll accept you as one of the family if you say yes. Make you an official pack member.”

  Elias peeked over his pillow and met the alpha’s pale gray eyes. “You’d keep me? No one has ever wanted me.”

  “We will, and we do want you,” Jess said, taking his hand. “What do you say?”

  He nodded, a fresh tear falling down his face. “But they’ll come. They won’t let me go.”

  “Don’t worry about that. We’ll end them. They can’t continue this reign of terror. Based on the stories we’re hearing, they are the scum of the Earth and we need to deal with them once and for all.”