Grace didn’t think much about it.
There was moonwalk set up. A huge balloon style building. Rhoda and Damian took off their shoes and went inside. Grace and Freddy waited for them outside the door.
“I wish I could do that,” Freddy said. “I bet I do it with grace and poise.”
“Oh, without a doubt.”
“You are doing very well with this all,” Freddy told her.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean the woman who couldn’t heat water, is suddenly changing diapers.”
Grace cringed. “I still don’t do that well.”
Freddy laughed.
George approached. “Having a good time?”
“Splendid,” Freddy said. “Do you like my hat?”
“No.” George shook his head
Freddy gasped.
“Anyhow, wanted to let you two know,” George said. “They don’t expect the Grand Jury to be out long on the case. Maybe even back today.”
“That wasn’t very long,’ Freddy said.
“Not at all. Your testimony made it pretty cut and dry. I think…”
George’s sentence was cut short when Larson plowed his way in. “Grace!” He leaped her way, embracing her. “Grace!”
Grace laughed. “Hey, Larson.”
“I miss ... miss … I miss you!”
“I miss you, too.”
“Bargain-Mart …” he twitched his head. “Sucks. Too my friend... took my friend way.”
“Yeah, they suck,” Grace said.
“Moon walk?” He asked, pointing.
“No, I’m too old,” she replied.
“Ok.” Larson nodded. Took a step, stopped and yelled, “Monsters of Maui!” and he darted into the Moonwalk.
George’s eyes bulged. “Did he just say …”
Freddy shook his head. “Don’t worry about him. He’s Larson.”
Grace added. “My number one fan.”
“Her only fan.”
Grace gasped, and in fake offense walked away from Freddy.
++++
Clyde didn’t look amused. In fact, he looked as if he’d rather be anywhere other than behind that booth.
Polly made the best of her job. Pleasant while greeting those she dealt with.
Freddy was truly interested in what kind of booth a hardware store would run at a fair.
He and Grace approached the both, Rhoda and Damian ran behind to see their grandfather.
“What are we selling?” Freddy asked.
“Chances,” Polly replied. “It’s bingo.”
“Oh, I love bingo. I am such the champ at the senior home,” Freddy said. “Where do we play?”
“You don’t. You do, but don’t. You buy a bingo square. It’s Cow plop Bingo.”
Freddy turned his head slightly, peering at Polly through the sides of his eyes. “Cow plop bingo? What is that?”
Polly explained. “They got a huge field out on 83, and they made it into a super bingo card. You buy a chance on a square. Three bucks for one. Five for two. Then they put Bessie the cow out to graze and whatever square she goes on, is the winning square.”
Freddy’s eyes widened. “We buy chances on which square a cow will poop in?”
“Yep.” Polly nodded.
“How much do we win?”
“Three hundred.”
“That’s a lot of money. Does the house keep the money if she fails to … drop?”
“No, she’ll go.”
“How do we know?” Freddy asked.
“She’s a cow.”
“What if she’s not inspired?”
“She’s a cow. She’ll graze and she’ll go.”
“Do they feed her a special diet for today?” Freddy asked. “Like a laxative? Although, grass is high in fiber.”
“Freddy …”
“One would think there has to be some sort of guarantee that she’ll go.”
“She’ll go,” Polly grew aggravated.
“Is there a time limit?” Freddy asked. “I mean what if she gets stage fright. I know when have to use a public rest room and someone walks in, I totally bind up.” He shuddered. “What if she gets like that when people are …”
“Freddy!” Polly yelled. “Buy a goddamn chance or not. Just stop talking about the cow going.”
“Fine.” Freddy laid a twenty on the counter. “Two for five? Give me eight random squares.”
Polly picked out his chances and handed them to Freddy.
He faced Grace. “I’ve wagered on a lot of things in my life. Never on a cow going to the bathroom.”
“Maybe you’ll win.”
“Perhaps we should go out to the field and cheer her on. It wouldn’t even have to be original,” Freddy said. “We could just yell, go, cow, go.”
It took a second for Grace to get it, and when she did, she laughed.
+++
It figured that they would run into Louise and Tina at the festival. With all the people, all the activities, Grace had hoped they wouldn’t.
She issued a small warning to Rhoda to not say anything, the best thing to do was keep silent and hope they moved along.
Even though Regan wasn’t barking at them, for safety sake, Grace stayed with the stroller, Rhoda at her side.
Louise and Tina were like high school bullies. Blocking the way.
Freddy handled it. “Telling them to shoo along.”
“There’s a freestyle wrestling night at the Samson’s bar,” Tina said. “Sign up at eight. I’m challenging you.”
“To a wrestling match?” Freddy said. “Dear, why would I want to wrestle you?”
Tina replied. “To end this. Tag team. Me and Louise against you and Grace.”
Rhoda nudged Grace. “Go for it.”
“Are you nuts?” Grace said in a whisper to Rhoda. “I’d get killed.”
“Maybe not.” Rhoda then looked at Tina. “Ok, maybe you will.”
Freddy in irritation, exhaled. “Girls. Really, this isn’t prison or high school. We don’t get anywhere bullying. We all be adult about this or I’m going to get the chief.”
“Excuse me,” Chief of Police Stew Graham called out.
“See?” Freddy said. “He senses danger at every corner.”
Stew held up Damian by her the waist of her pants. “This belong to you?”
Grace gasped and grabbed her. “Oh, my God, where was she?”
Damian quickly scooted behind Grace.
Stew answered. “Not far. Actually, just behind this booth. Squatting behind there, waiting to attack, watching, aiming, with this.” Stew presented the sling shot.
Grace took it. “It’s her toy.”
“It’s a weapon,” Stew said. “I’ve had several complaints about ankle welts.”
Damian defended herself. “I was only shooting raisins.”
“Still, a weapon,” Stew continued. “Only reason I’m giving it back is because I’m gonna trust you’ll keep that from her.”
“Yes, Chief. Putting it away now.” She put the sling shot in the diaper bag which hung off the stroller.
“Have a good one,” Stew turned and walked away
Grace turned, Tina and Louise were gone. “At least they left.”
“Beasts.” Freddy commented. “Let’s go check out the dunking booth.”
Agreeing, Grace turned the stroller, never noticing Damian hand as she reached in and took back her sling shot.
+++
By far the best time of the day for Freddy was the tug of war. Admittedly he was excited about twelve sweaty men without shirts, he was disappointed that there were twelve, hot, sweaty men without shirts. He allowed for his mind to take off.
The height of the tug of war came when Larson, ran down to the field and dove on the rope, dragging it down. The men on both side pulled hard and Larson flew up and landed in the dirt. He squealed and jumped happily like a pig.
Bobby was getting cleaned up, and Grace too the girls to the concession booth to get s
omething to eat.
“Don’t say anything about your dad’s team losing,” Grace instructed. “OK? I’m sure he feels bad.”
Rhoda shook her head. “He should be used to it. He loses every year.”
Grace snickered.
Damian tugged on her short. “Can we go pet the goats?”
“Um, sure. Don’t you want anything to eat?” Grace asked.
“Not right now,” Damian answered.
“Rhoda?” Grace questioned.
“Oh.” Rhoda smiled brightly. “Ms. Berkowitz, they’re taking sign ups for the corn eating contest. You think I can enter?”
“Do you want to?”
“I would love to. I am so fast at eating corn.”
“Really? Excellent,” Grace said. “I’ll sign you up. I’ll take pictures while you kick butt.”
“Yes!” Rhoda jumped. “Can I get a slice of watermelon?”
“Sure.” Grace handed her money, and when Rhoda went to the concession stand, she walked over to the sign up table and registered Rhoda.
Just after registering, Grace turned to be greeted with a kiss by Bobby.
“Hey,” he said, then leaned down to Regan and the stroller. He gave the baby a kiss. “How you guys doing?”
“Good, you?” Grace asked.
“Sore.” Bobby chuckled.
“Father!” Rhoda ran over with a huge slice of watermelon. “Guess what?”
“What?”
“Ms. Berkowitz signed me up for the corn eating contest.”
Bobby shifted his eyes to Grace.
Grace nodded with a smile. “She says she’s fast.”
“Real fast,” Rhoda added. “You know how fast I am. I so want to do this. I’m gonna win.”
Bobby crouched down to her. “Maybe you shouldn’t sweetheart.”
“Why?” she asked.
“Yeah,” Grace added. “Why?”
With a heavy exhale, Bobby stood up. “Kids can be cruel, Grace.” He looked at Rhoda. “Kids can be cruel, you know that. It might now be a good idea.”
The smile fell from Rhoda’s face.
“Well, I think,” Grace said. “I think it’s a great idea and winning is a perfect way to shut kids up. Don’t you Rhoda?”
Bobby just stared at Grace.
“Hey, why do you go pet the talented goats with your sister?” Grace suggested.
“Ok.”
Bobby held out his hand. “Why don’t you give me the watermelon?”
“Father, goats won’t eat it.” Rhoda said innocently.
“Just …” Bobby wiggled his fingers.
“Bobby.” Grace pushed down his hand. “Let her have the watermelon. Go on, Rhoda.”
“Ok.” Brightly, she skipped away.
“Can I speak to you?” Grace asked.
“Sure.”
“Bobby,” she sighed. “Bobby, you know. I love you and …”
“You love me?”
“Yes, and I …”
“Grace.” He smiled. “You’ve never said that.”
“I felt it,” She said. “Anyhow …”
“Is this a talk to tell me your feelings?”
“Yes.”
“Are you gonna talk all sweet and mushy to me.”
“Actually, I’m gonna probably come across as bitchy and nasty.”
Bobby’s eyes widened. “Babe, that’s not a way to let me know you love me.”
“Bobby, can I finish.”
“Sure. Go one.’ Bobby smiled.
“I love you ….”
“I love you too.”
Grace huffed. “Stop. Let me finish. I love you but I hate when you do that.”
“Do what?”
“Do what you do to Rhoda.”
“What are you talking about?” Bobby asked.
“Why did you want her watermelon?”
“Grace,” Bobby snickered out her name.
“Why? And why can’t she enter the corn eating contest?”
Bobby stood up straight. “Ok. Fine. Kids can be cruel. They’ll make fun. You aren’t blind.”
“You mean to the fact that she’s a little heavy.”
Bobby chuckled. “You’re being nice.”
“No, I’m being honest … asshole.”
As if he were hit with a board, Bobby jumped back. “Oh my god, did you just call me an asshole.”
“Yes. Asshole.” She poked him in the chest. “How dare you? How dare you do that to her? Take her food away. Make her self conscious about what she eats?”
“Grace, she has to watch what she …”
“She doesn’t eat junk, Bobby. She eats food. And she doesn’t eat alot of that, either. You think it’ll help her get thin to make her self conscious every time she takes a bite of food? Do you think it’ll help her to hold her back from things she wants to do because people will make fun of her? You know what, if you make her think that people will make fun of her now, she’ll spend the rest of her life thinking people are making fun of her.”
“Grace.” Bobby held up his hand. “I appreciate your concern and passion. But you don’t know.”
“Bullshit, I don’t know. I know very well, every aspect of it, because I was her. I was probably even larger than her.”
“You were?”
“Yes, I was. I was huge little kid, Bobby. I was so big, I had to wear a bra when I was eight. OK? And I outgrew it. But it didn’t stop me being self conscious. Right now, she’s still young. Give it time before you worry about. Don’t put shit in her head. Not now, that’s why there are eating disorders, because kids think they have to be thin. Because parents them they have to be thin. If you start now, she’ll spend the rest of her life thinking she’s fat, looking in the mirror and seeing that heavy girl, and feeling as if every time someone laughs, they are laughing at her. Don’t do it. I’m telling you.” Grace pointed her finger. “And I swear God, Bobby, if I ever hear you make her conscious about her weight again, I will lay you out.”
Bobby blinked. “Wow.”
“Ok?”
“The Bargain-Mart and Louise thing really has toughened you up.”
With a grunt, Grace playfully smacked him in the chest.
“OK. Ok. I’m kidding. I won’t. I promise.” Bobby smiled and kissed her. “Now, tell me again.”
“Tell you what?”
“That you love me.”
“No.” Grace turned and pushed the stroller. “I’m going to the goats. They’re supposed to be talented. And I don’t want to miss it.”
“Talented?” Bobby followed. “What do you mean? How are goats talented?”
“The sign,” Grace replied. “It says, caution, Goats shoot pellets.”
Bobby laughed.
“What? What is so funny?”
“It means when they go to the bathroom, it fires out their butt.”
Grace’s mouth dropped open.
“They’re talented all right.”
Grace ignored him, she figured he was just playing a sick joke, and headed to the Goat area anyhow.
+++
Alfonzo sat in his father’s office. He knew things weren’t good when the lawyer called him into the other room.
He sat, tapping his fingers to the arm of the chair, his mind more focused on why the story on Cara Mia was scooped for a transvestite story on her father. When he called the reporter, she merely told him she discovered the transvestite information and thought it was a bigger deal.
The door to the office opened and Lou stepped in.
“Not seen the news?” Lou asked.
Al shook his head.
“We’ve been indicted.”
“Oh, my God,” Al wisped out. “How? How?”
“How!” Lou blasted. “Goddamn witnesses to the murder of Sam Jenkins. Witnesses, Alfonzo! How the hell do you think? Two factors played into our indictment. The witnesses placing both of us there. Bruno has already been arrested for triggering him.”
“Who were the witnesses?”
Lou walked over and smacked his son in the back of the head. “Moron. Who do you think? You’re little girlfriend and her gay friend.”
“Did they tell you?”
“No, they didn’t confirm it. Who else was on the video? Who else could finger us being there?”
“But she’s on vacation.”
“And you’re an asshole for believing that. I’m putting the hit back on …”
“No!” Al stood up. “No. I love her. If … If I can get her to not testify. If I can get to do that…”
“How?”
“A wife can not testify against her husband,” Al said. “And if she doesn’t testify, Freddy won’t. I know he won’t.”
“Fine. Try.” Lou tossed up his hands. “Looks like the hearing will be after Christmas. You got till then. But they’re more then likely in the witness protection program.”
Al nodded.
“And you have to find them before the trial or you’ll spend the rest of your life, loving her from behind bars.”
Al nodded again. His father stormed out. He just had to come up with another game plan to find his Cara Mia.
+++
Grace could see it. The next day’s headlines in the Medina County Post: Eight Year old defends self with cob and still goes on to win her division.
It was intense. The competition was down to two people. The others folded or vomited, constituting elimination.
Rhoda and Larson.
When would it stop?
Grace actually started feeling sick watching it.
Rhoda sawed through the cobs of corn.
Toward the end, when the fresh corn was flying, Larson saw he was losing, and dove for Rhoda’s plate. After hitting him a few times with the kernel absent cob, Rhoda went on to victory.
Rhoda’s face, plastered with corn bits shined with happiness.
The first thing she did when she won was leap from the stage and run right to... Grace.
“Thank you, Thank you for saying I should do this.” Rhoda gushed.
Bobby watched.
“What a great feeling huh?” Grace said. “I am so proud of you.”
“Oh.” Rhoda grabbed her chest. “I don’t know how much I ate, but I kept going and going. I might vomit now, but that’s OK, right?”
“That’s OK.”
“Ok, I’m gonna go get sick.” Rhoda moved back, stopped ran back to Grace and gave her one more hug before running to the bathroom.
Charmed Life Page 17
