“Seriously!” she snapped. “It’s okay if you make each other bleed but what did you think Ava would do? Just stand there and watch you beat each other to a pulp? Men! I don’t get it!” she shouted to the sky, throwing her hands out to her sides.
“I’m okay,” I said, pushing unsteadily to my feet with Jet and Daisy helping me.
Once I got to my feet, I watched as Luke set Roxie aside and he did this by picking her up by her upper arms and literally setting her aside. Then he was there, I could see his black t-shirt in front of my face.
“Look at me,” he said and he definitely used a tone that one would obey without question because, even though I didn’t want them to, my eyes lifted to his. He stared at me closely. I still felt a little funny, a bit woozy, but even so I noticed the cut on his cheekbone, blood streaming from it and it made my stomach churn.
“You okay?” he asked.
I nodded, staring at his cut and all the blood and wondering when I’d ever learn my lesson.
Repeat after me.
No men. No men. No men.
The second I nodded, before I could ask if Luke or Ren were okay or I could throw an insane, out-of-control hissy fit of my own, Luke took my hand and started toward the Porsche. I looked back at the Rock Chicks and they were watching me, all except Ally who was (kind of angrily) wiping blood with a tissue from Ren’s face all the while giving him lip, which he deserved. Next time I talked to him I was going to verbally kick his ass.
Without thinking (I really should have thought), I got in the passenger side of the Porsche, Luke holding the door open for me and then slamming it shut behind me. He nabbed his jacket off the hood, shrugged it on, slid behind the wheel and, with no further ado, we took off like a shot.
It was then that being dazed by a tough guy, macho man elbow to the forehead wore off and I remembered Luke was angry. I remembered this because he drove like he was angry. He drove like he wanted to take me straight to the gates of hell and he wanted me to get there yesterday.
I was angry too but not angry or stupid enough to go up against the heat of fury rolling off Luke.
“Luke, please slow down,” I said while I chanced a glance at him. I saw his jaw clench but felt the car slow.
I decided that was all I should say, for now. I didn’t want to start the conversation we were inevitably going to have in the Porsche with Angry Luke at the wheel. Instead, I planned my defense for whatever was going to come next
One thing that was sure and certain and the blood proved it, not to mention Luke told me straight how he felt on several occasions, Luke was not the kind of guy who liked to walk into a bar and see his woman in another man’s arms.
How I was going to get out of Luke finding out that I told Ren about how he felt about Jules, I didn’t know but I was going to have to come up with something.
He parked in the garage and wordlessly we went up to the loft. I still wasn’t thinking clearly, it was the first time two guys had fought over me both getting bloody in the process. I again found myself in a situation where I didn’t know what to do and I was beginning to get a little sick of feeling clueless.
Sure, one could say considering I was practically living with Luke, I shouldn’t have relaxed into Ren and let him hold me during one of the sweetest, saddest songs ever written.
But on the other hand, it was one of the sweetest, saddest songs ever written.
It was lame but I was going to use that as my defense.
Then there was the fact Luke had a thing for Jules. It wasn’t nice that Luke was with me when he felt strongly for another woman but I probably shouldn’t have told that to Ren. However, who would have ever thought in a million years Ren would have shared.
However, Ren shared.
I was going to give in on that point and would likely have to apologize (even though that would suck).
But I did have the whole fistfight thing to throw in his face. Being a tough guy, macho man was one thing, getting in fights in bar parking lots was something else. Who did that kind of thing? It was juvenile and took the whole tough guy thing a shade too far.
The doors to the elevator opened, we walked in and Luke flipped on the lights.
I turned to him to say something, I didn’t know what, when he calmly walked to the bed, picked up the lamp on the bedside table, yanked the cord out with one vicious tug and threw it with a savage side arm throw across the room.
I watched it sail then smash against the semi-circular bar, its pieces flying.
All righty then.
One thing I knew, I wasn’t going to bring up my Sweetest, Saddest Song Ever Written Defense.
He turned to me. I took one look at him and saw he was so beyond controlling-fury mode that it wasn’t funny.
“Luke,” I started in order to try to defuse the situation and I was going to do it by shifting the focus and seeing to his cut. Priorities first and blood was pretty much always a priority. “We need to clean that cut.”
“Pack,” he responded.
I blinked. “What?” I asked.
“Pack. Now.”
Then without another word, he shrugged off his jacket, tossed it on the bed, walked by me and into the bathroom. I turned in a half-circle, my eyes and body following him. I watched him turn on the bathroom light, nab a washcloth and then he started to clean his cut.
Something was happening to my throat, I couldn’t quite understand what it was but I was kind of thinking it was panic mingled with fear again, this time significantly magnified.
I went to the bathroom door. “Luke, I…” I started and then stopped because I didn’t know what to say. Further, he didn’t even glance at me.
It was then I realized there really wasn’t anything to say.
Bottom line, now he knew that I knew he was in love with Jules. The jig was up and obviously we were over.
I didn’t understand why he was so angry about it but I’d think about that later, when Dom was gone and Sissy was with me and we had lots and lots of tequila, which always helped women understand how men’s minds worked.
And this, I told myself, was a good thing (not the angry part, the jig being up part). I told myself this but I wasn’t very convincing.
I turned away from the door (by the way, he never looked at me, it was like I ceased to exist which made my throat feel all the funnier) and went to my luggage.
I’d been keeping my things pretty tidy, I just had some stuff in the laundry room, the bathroom and a few things on the nightstand. I went to the laundry room and separated my clothes in the dryer from Luke’s. This activity made my throat stop feeling funny and start feeling tight. I hurried as fast as I could, taking my clothes back to my luggage and shoving it all in without folding it which was hard to do, I didn’t like to iron but this was definitely not the time to be obsessively tidy.
I grabbed my toiletries bag and went into the bathroom. I walked by Luke who, at this point, was putting those little white strips on his cut to hold the edges together and pulled back the shower door to get my shampoo and conditioner.
Just like he’d done to me, I tried to ignore him.
This became hard when I’d nabbed my stuff, shoved it into the bag, turned back around and Luke was standing dead center of the bathroom, feet planted, arms crossed on his chest.
Clearly, Luke was done ignoring me.
“Which one?” he asked.
I shook my head because I wasn’t following.
“Which one did you convince yourself I was thinkin’ of when I was fuckin’ you? Was it Roxie?”
I stared at him, my tight throat getting even tighter because he was guessing. Why on earth was he guessing?
No time to dwell on that without tequila.
Time to move on, fast.
“I’ll, um…” I stopped, deciding to ignore his question and get on with packing so I could get out, get to the store, buy an enormous amount of food that had no healthy living mojo whatsoever, go home and start the painful process of gettin
g over Luke which I assumed would take me approximately one hundred and fifty years therefore, I had to get started, pronto. After making this decision, I started speaking again. “Give someone a call to come and pick me up.”
I leaned to the side, reached to get my toothbrush and his hand shot out, fingers wrapping around my wrist and he yanked on it, bringing me closer to him.
My head tilted back and I looked at him. I was beginning to lose it, beginning to let all those things I wasn’t thinking of, all those things I’d buried, seep into my head and they were overpowering.
I wanted to be angry. It wasn’t me who was in love with someone else. It wasn’t me who had a fight in bar parking lot like a testosterone-fuelled idiot. However, for some reason, I was having trouble holding on to anger and instead felt something far, far worse.
“Which one?” he repeated.
“Luke, let me go,” I said quietly, mainly because my throat was closing even more and I couldn’t get more than a quiet sound out of my mouth. I swallowed as I felt the tears hit the backs of my eyes and I looked down at his fingers wrapped around my wrist. When he didn’t release me, I repeated, “Please, let go.”
“Look at me,” he returned, his tone low and vibrating with fury.
“Please let me go,” I whispered again and I felt the wetness in my eyes start to spill over just as he used my wrist to give me another yank. I really didn’t want to cry but I didn’t have a choice. It was either that or let my throat close completely, making me suffocate which, I thought distractedly, might not be a bad thing.
His fingers were beginning to get painful and I continued in a whisper. “You’re hurting me.”
He let my wrist go immediately, tore the bag out of my other hand and threw it in the sink. Then he advanced, pushing me back against the wall, his body coming in close, his heat hitting me.
I kept my face down and to the side and pressed my lips together trying to control my thoughts and the tears. His anger filled the room but it didn’t frighten me. All I could think was getting out, slicing off this part of my life and starting over, as soon as possible.
“Look at me, Ava,” Luke pressed. “Which one?”
“Step back, Luke,” I said in a small voice but he just pushed closer.
“I’ll take you to Zano myself the minute you fuckin’ answer me.”
I flinched as uncontrolled pain sliced through me at Luke offering to take me to Ren. I hated the idea that he was so through with me that he was ready to hand me off to another man. But there it was.
“Move away, please,” I said quietly.
He pressed even closer, his body now full frontal with mine and I was looking at his shoulder.
“You didn’t feel it at all, did you Ava?” he asked and I could tell by the sound of his voice that this was an important question. I didn’t know what he was talking about and I wasn’t going to ask.
I lifted my hands to his waist, grabbed fistfuls of his tee and pushed, pressing my bodyweight into his to move him back. The tears were streaming down my face and I was going to make sob noises soon, I just knew it. I didn’t want him to see me cry but I really didn’t want him to hear me make a sob noise.
“Move away,” I repeated.
“Who the fuck was it that you told Zano I was thinkin’ of when I was fuckin’ you?” he was back to his original topic, which was and was not a relief considering I knew what he was talking about this time but I still didn’t wish to participate in the discussion.
“Move away,” I said again.
“Answer me.”
That was when I lost it mainly because I couldn’t take any more. It was actually surprising I’d lasted this long. I looked up at him, not caring that he could see me cry.
I had to get out. Now.
I felt the sad desperation start to subside and anger start to take control and I held fast to the anger.
“Luke, move away!” I snapped but unfortunately my voice hitched on the end.
“Answer me!” Luke thundered and I’d had enough.
“Jules!” I yelled in his face. “Jules! All right?” I shoved at his shirt but he didn’t move an inch (per usual). Of course it was then that I made the humiliating sob sound in my throat but I powered through it. “I heard you call her ‘babe’, I saw you standing close, holding her face, stroking her cheek, just like you do to me. You were looking at her, like… like…” I couldn’t say it and I didn’t have to. It finally hit me that he couldn’t hold me pinned to wall not for another second, not one more fucking second.
“Move, the fuck, back! Right now!” I screamed.
He didn’t move, instead he stared at me, straight in the eyes with that scary, fury-unleashed look.
Then his gaze wandered, down the tracks of tears and something happened just like when he was angry at me when he thought I was yanking his chain and he ended up declaring I was his. At first it flickered in his eyes and then his face began to soften, the fury melting, the electricity sliding out of the room and I had the distinct feeling I was in more trouble than ever.
It was too late for me. I didn’t care what was happening with Luke, I was done. I’d buy more whatever it was I’d leave behind in his loft. I was going, immediately.
With a mighty, superhuman push, I moved Luke back an inch and slid out from in front of him and ran from the room. I kicked the lid closed on my bag and bent double to zip it but didn’t even get my hands on it before I was lifted in the air.
Foiled.
Always, always, foiled. Even when it mattered the most.
Luke settled me in his arms, carrying me like a groom carrying his bride over the threshold. I was still crying, pushing against his shoulders, kicking my legs and struggling like the bride from hell. My struggle didn’t last long. He planted a knee in the bed, dropped me on it and before I could move an inch, he covered my body with his.
Shit!
“Get off!” I shoved at his shoulders, arching my back, bucking my hips. It was like I didn’t move, his face was in my face and one of his hands came to my jaw. I jerked my head away and looked anywhere but at him.
“Did you tell Zano I was thinkin’ of Jules when I fucked you?” His voice was quieter, softer and even though his complete change in tone took me off guard, I still kept my face averted.
I decided to answer his question. As far as I was concerned, the sooner this conversation was over, the better.
“Ren came up with that on his own. I just told him you were in love with someone else.”
“Ava, I’m not in love with Jules.”
Bullshit, I thought but did not say and kept looking away.
“Fine, great, sorry for the misunderstanding. Now if you’ll get up, I’m going home.”
“Babe, look at me.” Now he was using his gentle, affectionate voice and I had to bite my lip. The tears were still coming but they were subsiding. The Voice would make them come back full strength, I knew it.
“Please get off,” I repeated. “I need to go home.”
His weight settled full on me and his hands came to frame my face, forcing me to look at him.
I was too caught up in my drama to notice the look on his face. I just focused on the next second which would take me to the next second and the next, which would eventually take me home, where I could be safe, renew my vows to my vibrators and never leave my house ever again.
“Jules is pregnant, Ava.”
In a flash, thoughts of vibrators and a lifetime of being a hermit flew out the window and my eyes focused on his.
“What?” I asked.
“Vance told me yesterday morning. It’s early, she doesn’t want anyone to know until she’s further along. Vance didn’t agree. He’s fuckin’ beside himself. He told everyone but Shirleen.”
I realized I wasn’t breathing. Then I realized I forgot how.
Luke kept talking. “That’s why I was standin’ close to her, touching her face. She’s got no blood family left and Vance isn’t close to his. They’ve been
through a lot and they both want this. I’m happy for them, this is a good thing.”
Ho-ly crap.
Okay. It was official. I was The A-Number-One Dork of All Time.
I told you that you should have talked to him, Good Ava admonished.
Bad Ava was silent.
Good Ava looked around my neck at Bad Ava. Nothing to say?
Bad Ava looked around my neck at Good Ava. Then she put her thumb to her nose and wiggled her fingers at her.
Rock Chick Revenge Page 34
