The instant the words left her mouth, his face closed. Part of her wanted to take the statement back, but she couldn’t. She truly believed it. And part of her really wanted Jesse to come to believe it, as well. But she wouldn’t nag him about his beliefs.
She squeezed his hand again, hoping to give further comfort with her presence, their connection.
“If he won’t go back to Boston, I’ll have to,” Jesse said quietly, looking down at their joined hands.
She admired his conviction. She knew he hoped to find a fresh start in Chicago, but to be willing to return to Boston to see to the care of an old woman and her daughter showed true character.
“You’ve brought the situation to Jared’s attention. Now let him deal with it,” she said. “I’m going to see if I can fetch Amelia from the powder room.”
She felt his eyes on her back as she moved away. She found the other woman in the small vestibule, eyes red-rimmed as if she’d been crying.
“Did Jared send you after me? Oh, I’m so sorry to have ruined a nice meal together like this. I don’t get to dine out often.” Amelia sniffed and Erin was afraid she would become upset again.
“It’s all right,” Erin comforted her, pressing her own lace handkerchief into the other woman’s hand. “Jared didn’t send me, but I wanted to come check on you. Are you all right?”
“Yes, I’m fine.” She sniffled again and Erin knew the other woman’s tears were still close to the surface.
Erin guided Amelia to a small sofa just inside the vestibule and they both perched on the edge of it.
“Jared mentioned a bit about your mother’s health concerns. I know it must be trying to be responsible for someone else’s care at all times. Are you the only one who cares for her?”
Amelia fiddled with the handkerchief, looking down. “My older sister tries to help, but she’s got her own family to worry about.”
“What about you? Your plans for starting a family? Jared seems a fine man.”
Amelia looked up, eyes bright with emotion. “He is, to be sure. We’ve spoken of marriage a couple of times in passing, but I couldn’t ask a man to take on the burden of supporting both my mother and I.”
“Do you honestly think Jared is the kind of man who would let that matter?”
“No.” Amelia sniffled again, and pressed the handkerchief beneath her nose. “That’s why I know he’ll choose the right thing and go to his mother in Boston.”
It was clear Amelia thought the world of Jared, and expected him to do right by his mother. And leave her behind to do so.
While Erin saw his devotion to Amelia when he’d said at the table, “I’m not leaving,” and meant he wasn’t leaving her.
Clearly the two were in love and only needed a little push—and possibly a little help—to make things right for them both.
“Let me ask you a question,” Erin said, an idea forming. “What would you be willing to do for Jared...?”
* * *
Jesse couldn’t help wondering what was taking so long when the women didn’t immediately return to the table.
Not that he was in a big hurry to see Erin again. He had the thought that he’d disappointed her with his reaction to her faith statement, but his initial reaction had been to distrust what she said. Her words had brought back everything Jim had tried to pound into him with his preaching. But as Jesse had walked back to the dining room alone, he’d realized that she’d actually been trying to help him. Not that he thought God or anyone wanted Jesse’s burdens, but it was kind of her to try.
Jared glared at him across the table, seeming to think the same thing about the women. Only Pete didn’t seem to notice anything amiss, as he continued to clean his plate.
Jesse was disheartened. The remainder of the juicy steak on his plate held no interest for him; he’d lost his appetite.
If Jared refused to return to Boston, Jesse himself would have to do it. He’d promised Jim as the other man had died that Jesse would care for his family. And when Jared’s mother had asked him to bring back her second son, Jesse thought it would be the easiest way to get absolution. He never thought Jared wouldn’t want to return.
Thinking about returning to Boston made Jesse feel green, like Pete had been on the train.
He’d desperately wanted a chance to start fresh, to make a new life for himself away from Boston. Honest work, not being a confidence man any longer, or at least not after he’d made a few bucks to set himself up.
He was starting to want to be the kind of man Erin would be proud to be with.
“Where are they?” Jared demanded, finally plunking his fork down on the table.
“Probably gabbing in the powder room.” Jesse wasn’t too worried, not yet. “Erin likes to chat and she’s only had me and the boy—” he hiked his finger at Pete “—to talk to for the last couple days. She’s probably talking Amelia’s ear off.”
Jared’s expression softened. “Amelia, too. She’s cooped up a lot with only her mother for company, and sometimes she just needs to talk to another woman. Someone her own age.”
It was clear the other man adored his sweetheart. Jesse’s mind began to work as he tried to figure out a way to work that to his advantage. Could he somehow play Jared’s love for Amelia to make the other man want to return to Boston?
“Maybe this dinner was a good idea after all,” Jared said with a reluctant smile.
It had been Erin’s suggestion in the first place. She continued to help Jesse, offering him comfort in the lobby just now, even when she’d been disappointed by his and Pete’s deception earlier that afternoon.
“Amelia certainly seems like a nice gal,” Jesse said casually.
Jared nodded, digging back into his food, and Jesse attempted to follow suit, even though he wasn’t hungry.
“She’s the best thing to ever happen to me,” Jared said between bites.
“Seems like you would want to get a ring on her finger then.”
The other man choked on his bite, face turning red as he reached for and gulped water to try to dislodge it.
“I’d love to,” he finally spluttered, “but a man’s got to be able to support his woman, and I’m just now getting set up, with the new raise at the lumberyard. I won’t ask her until I’ve got some funds in the bank.”
Something Jesse could understand. And again, it came down to money. If he had the funds, he could offer to help with Jared’s expenses and free the man up to go to Boston. Without money, how could he get Jared to agree to go?
“I don’t suppose they’re hiring?” Jesse asked.
He wasn’t sure he could make it in honest work, but he wanted to try.
“I see Pete’s nearly cleaned his plate.” Erin’s cheery voice turned his head and Jesse was struck anew by her beauty as she approached the table. Her face shone, and Jesse realized what set her apart from all the other women, even high-society women, he’d known. It was that peace she carried with her.
“Yes’m,” Pete said. “Seems a shame to waste food this good.”
“You’re entirely correct.” Amelia settled into her seat next to Jared. Amelia was smiling, too, with a shared glance at Erin that suddenly made Jesse feel they’d hatched some plan and perhaps he and Jared had better watch out. “Forgive us for our absence. I see it hasn’t stopped you men from enjoying your meals,” she said with an affectionate nudge of her man.
Jared studied her face closely and seemed to be relieved at what he saw there. Jesse watched as he reached over and swiped a stray bit of hair that had caught on her cheek. “You all right?” Jesse had to read his lips to catch the words; they were spoken too low to hear over the other diners.
Amelia nodded and bent to say something to him but Jesse’s attention was diverted when Erin leaned close enough that her breath warmed his ear when she wh
ispered, “It will take care of itself.”
He wanted to question her further and find out just what she’d done, but she leaned away and engaged Pete in conversation.
By the time everyone had emptied their plates, the waiter returned with the dessert cart.
“We should get a slice of that cake Erin mentioned earlier,” Amelia said to Jared. “To celebrate.”
“Celebrate what?” he asked absently, eyes on the sweets presented before them. He didn’t notice her trembling smile, but Jesse did.
“Our engagement.”
Jared went wide-eyed. “What?” He half laughed.
Amelia’s chin went up slightly. Her eyes didn’t waver from Jared. “Would you refuse me?” she asked softly.
Jared considered her in silence for a long moment. “Of course not.” Slowly, a smile stretched across his face. “You’ll really marry me?”
Jesse looked down when he found that Erin’s hand had again slipped into his. For someone who hadn’t experienced kind touches in years, her softness was a balm to his soul and he found he was getting quite used to it.
A glance at her face that mirrored the joy shared by the couple across from them now sharing a hushed conversation, and he knew she’d had something to do with Amelia’s agreeing to marry Jared. Had she offered a monetary gift? The thought made Jesse’s stomach roil again as he thought of the growing amount he owed to either the hotel or Erin herself.
After congratulations had been exchanged and thick slices of cake consumed, Jared and Amelia took their leave and Pete, Jesse and Erin made the trek back upstairs to their rooms.
After riding the elevator up, Pete’s jaw cranked open in a wide yawn and Jesse imagined he was still exhausted after surviving his bout of food poisoning just the night before. The boy excused himself to go to bed, but Jesse lingered in the hallway outside the door to Erin’s room. Without the excuse of a sick boy to care for, he knew it wouldn’t be proper to be in the same room with her at this time of night.
“Did you offer money to Amelia to get her to propose to Jared?” he asked bluntly.
“No!” she said with a surprised laugh. “They are so in love...offering a bribe like that would’ve diminished what they felt for each other.” She shook her head, eyes scrutinizing his face. “All I did was talk to Amelia and help her see she was putting obstacles between them that didn’t have to be there.”
She continued studying him and Jesse wondered what she was looking for in his features.
“I’m happy things worked out for them,” Erin said softly. She seemed in no hurry to go inside her room.
Jesse nodded, but his mind still whirled with his dilemma. “I’m glad for them, too, but I don’t see how getting married is going to get them to Boston to take care of his ma.” He leaned his shoulder against the wall, standing close but not too close to Erin as to be considered inappropriate.
“Amelia and I talked things over a bit. She wants to marry soon and she’s determined to talk him into a honeymoon trip to Boston. When they get there, they can decide what to do about Jared’s mother. If she isn’t too bad off, she thinks they could bring her and his sister here and combine both households. If Jared’s sister agrees, it might actually relieve some of the burden on Amelia, if the two of them can work out a way to share the duties of caring for two older women.”
“I thought Amelia had to care for her ailing mother? How can she take a trip?”
“Amelia has a sister who can care for their mother if they aren’t gone too long.”
His little fixer had everything all figured out, but Jesse still felt the heavy weight of his responsibility. He needed to be sure Jared would return to Boston for his mother. Sending money wasn’t enough. Jim’s death had to mean something.
The weight of it felt impossible to lift.
Jesse thought of the other thing that was bugging him.
“I’ll find a way to pay for the meal,” he said, aware that she’d had the entire sum charged to their rooms. He had no intention of allowing Erin to foot the bill, not when she’d staged the entire thing for his benefit in the first place.
“That’s not necessary,” she replied, shaking her head. He noticed the back of her intricate style was beginning to fall out, curls raining down on her slender neck and shoulders. His hand ached to bury in them and pull her close for a kiss, but he knew that was impossible. He pushed both hands behind his back, pressed them to the wall.
He made his voice firm. “It’s what I want. I’ll figure out a way.”
“Fine,” she said brusquely, staring down at her hands where she’d clasped them in front of her. “I’ll pay for the hotel in the morning and leave my address for you. When you’ve earned an appropriate sum, you can forward it to me.”
He frowned, but imagined it was an acceptable solution to her, seeing as she didn’t think he could have a way to pay for his part by the morning.
“Listen, I don’t want to talk about money right now.” She twisted her hands together, and then looked up at him with those incredible blue eyes. “In the morning, we’ll be going in our separate directions and...”
She seemed to run out of words, an unusual thing for her. He was used to her chatter.
She watched his face again, but he worked to keep his expression neutral, even as she talked about her departure and he felt like his heart was being ripped from his chest. Breath left her lips in a soft exhalation, and she went on.
“Is there anything I can do to help you? I don’t have any connections in Chicago, but perhaps I could wire my father to see if any of his business connections could help you.”
He knew the admission cost her, because he remembered her saying she’d left Boston to get away from the man’s manipulations, but Jesse didn’t want to be beholden to her any more than he already was.
“That’s very kind of you, but I’m sure I’ll be able to find something.”
“But what about lodgings? Where will you stay?”
“Erin.” He said her name when really he wanted to silence her by placing a kiss on her warm, enticing lips. He fisted his hands behind him. “I’ve been taking care of myself since I was fifteen.” Not that he’d always done such a good job. “I’ll be all right.”
Her concern made his resolve waver. His own mother had offered only a token protest when he’d left home at fifteen, but most of her worry had been for Daniel. As it should’ve been.
Who, other than Erin, had offered Jesse any concern? No one. And he was afraid he might be falling in love with her because of it. He imagined her concern was only an outpouring of the gentle, generous spirit she exhibited constantly. And he knew he didn’t deserve it, not one bit.
“What about Pete?” she asked, looking down now. “I meant to do some checking on local orphanages this afternoon, or perhaps contact a nearby church, but with all the other goings-on, I lost track of time.”
There wouldn’t have been much time after she’d found out Pete wasn’t his brother and before their dinner plans.
“He’s not your responsibility,” Jesse reminded her.
“That doesn’t mean I can just leave him to fend for himself,” she argued hotly, about as he expected her to. She liked to fight for the underdog, he knew that about her now. “He’s only a little boy,” she went on. “Maybe I should stay another day and see him settled somewhere...”
“And maybe he won’t even be in the room when we wake up in the morning.”
Her eyes went wide, and Jesse held up his palm to forestall her disgruntled argument.
“The kid is streetwise. The only reason he’s stuck around this long is he thinks he’s found a cash cow to bleed dry.” Right now Jesse wasn’t sure if it was her or himself.
She bit her lip, but he still didn’t stop. “He might’ve approached me first, but when he figured out that yo
u’ve got about the most generous heart a body’s ever seen, you’d better believe he latched onto you.”
She raised her chin in a little imitation of Pete. “I don’t care,” she said defiantly. “If he needs help, and I can give it, why shouldn’t I?”
“Because he’ll take everything you’ve got,” Jesse said. Aware that two days before, Jesse had seriously thought about it himself. “I was only a few years older than Pete when I left home. If I had met someone like you back then—” or before he’d gotten to know her “—I would’ve had your purse in the work of a few moments and been on my merry way.”
She stared at him as if she didn’t know him at all, as if he’d accosted her in the hall instead of spent the better part of two days together and become almost...friends.
Her distaste stung, and even worse was the thought that pickpocketing was the least of things he’d done to survive on the streets, or done to get ahead a few bucks. He shoved off the wall where he’d been leaning, half turning away from her because he couldn’t bear that look.
But she didn’t allow him to escape. She reached out and tangled their hands together again, the way she’d done twice at dinner. The simple touch of her hand threatened to unman him.
“I would’ve given it to you,” she said softly, looking up into his face with those guileless blue eyes, and he knew what she said was true. “I wish I would’ve known you then so I could’ve helped you.”
“I don’t understand you,” he said, his own honesty surprising him as he just blurted it out. “I’ve never met anyone like you, and I don’t understand how you can be so...” Generous, giving, unselfish, perfect, amazing. “I don’t deserve your help, much less your friendship. You’re too generous.”
She shook her head. “There’s no such thing.”
“Sure there is. One of these days, you might get taken advantage of.”
She shook her head again, laughter dancing in her eyes. “I can take care of myself.”
She’d said it before but he still didn’t believe it.
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