by Sophia Renny
“Yep.”
“Are we going to Narragansett Beach?”
“Nope.”
“Scarborough Beach?”
“Nope.”
She continued the guessing game as he drove along, even when she realized where they were headed. When he pulled into a parking lot off Sand Hill Cove Road, she gave him a happy smile. “I haven’t been here since last summer. What a perfect idea!”
He’d taken them to Galilee, a fishing village on Point Judith and the site of the Block Island Ferry. She and her parents had come here at least once every summer when she was growing up. Last year, she and Hannah had taken the ferry over to Block Island for a girls’ weekend.
“I haven’t either,” he said, sharing her smile. “I like it better after the summer crowds have gone.”
They exited the truck and stood together in the unpaved parking area, looking around. He pointed across the street to Champlin’s, a fresh seafood market with a restaurant on the second floor. “How about there? It’s still a little before noon. We’ll beat the rush.”
“Sounds good to me.”
She ambled alongside him towards the gray shingled building. As they walked up the outer stairs to the restaurant, she felt his palm settle against the small of her back. Something quickened inside of her. She didn’t pull away, letting him guide her as they approached the order window. They studied the menu affixed to the wall.
“Think I’ll go for a lobster roll and slaw,” he said. “What do you want?”
“Clear chowder. And I’ll have the coleslaw, too.”
“I’m getting a beer. You want one?”
She had a very brief internal debate between keeping her promise to never drink alcohol again and the allure of enjoying an ice cold beer on a warm late summer day. “Sure. A pale ale.”
He dropped his hand from her back and pulled his wallet from his rear pocket. “Go grab a table on the deck. I’ll wait for our order.”
She nodded. Glancing around, she noticed the inside dining room was only half full. The deck, shaded by a blue awning, was more crowded, but there were still some empty tables available. She snagged some napkins and utensils before heading outside.
She commandeered a picnic table and sat down, facing the water view. While she waited for Tony, she gazed across the harbor towards the cluster of houses and buildings that lined the shore of Jerusalem, Rhode Island. It was a pleasing mix of ramshackle beach shacks and more upscale dwellings. Wooden piers jutted out into the water. Most of the boat slots were empty; the commercial fishing boats had left hours ago. A leisure boat slowly cruised along the water towards the sea, rock music sounding from its stereo. The sky was powder blue with just a few puffy white clouds hovering in the distance. She inhaled the briny air and closed her eyes, savoring the smells of ocean and fish—fresh and fried—and the distant hint of autumn. The sound of the water lapping against the pilings lulled her into a sunny daydream.
“Falling asleep on me already?”
Tony’s teasing inquiry compelled her eyes to flutter open. His arm brushed against her shoulder as he set a food-laden tray on the table. He sat down beside her on the bench.
“It’s such a lovely day,” she murmured.
He swiveled his head towards her. He’d removed his sunglasses. His eyes were soft on her face. “It sure is.”
She blinked slowly up at him, caught in his gaze. There was that strange, quickening feeling again. She looked away from him, forced her attention on their lunch. “Mmm. This looks good. And you got my favorite beer. Thanks!”
She picked up the bottle and clicked it against his before taking a swallow. Then she set it down and dug into her chowder and slaw.
They ate in an easy silence, enjoying the food, the fresh air and the scenery. The Block Island Ferry traveled up the harbor, loaded with homeward-bound vacationers as well as islanders visiting the mainland. People lined the railings, many of them waving at the diners. Tony and Julia waved back.
Tony tossed his napkin on the tray and patted his flat stomach. “That hit the spot. Are you finished?”
She drank the last of her beer and set it down. “We should go for a walk. Otherwise, I’m going to fall asleep right here.”
He nudged her lightly in the ribs with his elbow. “Lightweight.”
She rolled her eyes at him before swinging her legs over the bench and rising to her feet. “If they could mix beer and sunshine into a sleeping pill, I’d never have insomnia again.”
Concern touched his expression. “Still not sleeping well?”
She shrugged. “Better than I was.”
His eyes rested speculatively on her face for a few moments, but he said nothing further as he helped her load up the tray and clean off the table. After they’d both used the restroom, they headed outside. They walked along the breachway towards the ocean and then kicked off their shoes, carrying them as they strolled close to the water’s edge on Salty Brine State Beach.
The beach wasn’t as crowded as it would have been at the height of summer, but it was still very busy. Julia watched some children making sandcastles and thought of the happy times she’d enjoyed here when she was their age.
Memories of Joe drifted into her thoughts again. She was trying to remember if he had ever come here with her. She didn’t think so. They’d seldom had outings like this. He’d simply had no time during those early years when he’d been fighting to keep the company afloat. And as she became more immersed in the event business, she hadn’t had much time for days like this either.
Funny, she’d never given it much thought until now—the fact that she and Joe hadn’t experienced many of the normal dating and courtship rituals that most couples did. They’d behaved like an established, settled couple right from the start. There had never been anything close to a courting stage in their relationship; she had never been wooed.
Tony grabbed her hand to catch her attention. “Let’s go sit on the rocks. Watch the boats for a while.”
“Okay.”
He kept her hand in his as they retraced their steps to the breachway, and she let him. His grip was gentle, but she felt its underlying male strength. She missed holding hands with a man. When they reached the breachway, he released her hand so that they could put on their shoes before clambering over the rocks to the other side. They found a flat, dry surface and sat down side by side.
It was very entertaining watching the various outbound and inbound boats go by: large commercial fishing boats, recreational trawlers, leisure boats and the occasional sailboat.
Joe brought his legs to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. “I loved coming here as a kid. This was one of my dad’s favorite places.”
She copied his pose. “I miss him.”
“Yeah.” His tone was gruff.
She rested her cheek on her knees, her head turned towards him. “You remind me of him. I think you take after your dad the most. There’s something around the jaw and the eyes. Joe has your mother’s eyes.”
He looked at her. “Do you know that’s the first time you’ve spoken his name out loud to me since the day you came back from San Diego?”
“It is?”
“Yeah.”
“I guess that’s a good sign then.”
His eyes sharpened. “Did you watch the show?”
“Yes.”
“And?”
“I could literally see them falling in love. Part of me was hoping…” She faltered. She pressed her lips together and slid her eyes away from his.
“Hoping for what?”
She lifted her head, keeping her gaze forward. She shrugged one shoulder. “That it wasn’t real. That it had only been infatuation. That he’d change his mind.”
“You’d have taken him back?” His harsh voice was almost like a whiplash.
She flinched. She sat up straight. “Of course not.”
“Look me in the eye and say that.”
She swung her head towards him. “You sound angry. Why
?”
“Just tell me that you wouldn’t have taken him back.”
“It’s a moot point. He’s not leaving her.”
“Say it.” His voice was low and terse.
She lifted her chin. “No. I wouldn’t have taken him back.”
His tense posture relaxed a little. “Good. My opinion of you would have dropped several notches if you’d said yes.”
She felt a rising tide of anger, the kind of anger she’d only felt during those long ago arguments with him. “Don’t be nasty.”
“I’m just stating the truth. I don’t like weak-minded women. It’s not attractive.”
“I’m not weak,” she seethed.
His features softened. He unclasped his arms from around his legs and reached out to brush the back of his hand across her cheek. “No, you’re not,” he agreed, his husky voice grabbing her low. “You’re one of the strongest women I know. But you’ve had your time to be miserable. Now it’s time to move on. Be the Julia that I love.”
She stared at him mutely, her thoughts and emotions all jumbled.
And then Tony took on his usual cheerful personality again. He removed his hand from her cheek and rose to his feet. He pulled his cellphone from his pocket and glanced at it. “It’s almost two o’clock. How about we get an ice cream cone for the road? There’s somewhere else I want to take you.”
Chapter Five
What was the matter with her?
Julia shifted restlessly in her seat, keeping her gaze averted from Tony as they drove away from Galilee. She licked and nibbled at her vanilla ice cream cone, but she wasn’t really tasting it.
She didn’t know if she should feel angry with him for prying into her intimate thoughts or grateful that he was gently prodding her to move forward with her life.
It wasn’t gratitude she was feeling. She didn’t know what she was feeling really. It was all so strange. Something between them was changing. It was there in the air between them, almost tangible. She wasn’t sure she liked it. She’d always been so comfortable with the adult Tony. He was fun. Charming. Easy. But she’d glimpsed his darker, more serious side today; one that she hadn’t witnessed in years.
He began to whistle along with the classic Eagles tune playing softly on the radio. She flicked a glance at him. He’d finished his ice cream cone. He had his right hand on the steering wheel, his left arm propped on the window ledge. He’d rolled his window down. He looked happy, carefree.
Maybe she was reading too much into things. It wasn’t as if he’d never touched her before or told her that he loved her. He’d always been more demonstrative of his feelings than Joe, more tactile and vocal in expressing his love for his family and closest friends. But, before, the words had always been said in a friendly, lighthearted way.
It was probably only because she was feeling so vulnerable and needy that she was reading more in Tony’s words and actions than what was actually there. She was missing a lover’s touch, that’s all.
She and Tony were simply good friends, maybe even best friends. Yes, she felt the same for him as she did for Hannah. They were the two people who had stood by her the most during these last few months.
She relaxed. She gobbled down the rest of her ice cream cone and cleaned off her fingers with a paper napkin. She pinned a smile on her face and put gaiety in her voice as she turned towards Tony. “Where are we headed now?”
He kept his eyes straight ahead. The corner of his mouth twitched. “You’ll see.”
“More guessing games?”
“It’s not too far away. Let’s stop here first.” He slowed the truck down and turned into the parking lot outside a corner market. He flashed a brief smile at her as he exited the truck. “Stay here. I’ll be right back.”
She watched him walk towards the building entrance. Her eyes lingered on his trim backside, his tanned, muscled calves, the confident way he carried himself.
Stop it. Just stop it.
He returned a few minutes later and placed a bag in the truck bed. “Not much farther to go,” he assured her as he got back in the truck.
Less than ten minutes later they were turning onto a familiar dirt road.
Julia gave a soft gasp and leaned forward in her seat.
“Remember this place?” Tony asked, his voice a little raspy.
“Yes.”
He pulled the truck under the shade of an elm tree and killed the ignition. “That was a good day,” he said quietly, not looking at her.
He hopped down from the truck. She got out after him, watched him as he threw the grocery bag into an ice chest and hefted the container from the truck bed. “Need any help?” she asked.
“Grab that bucket and the net.”
She followed him down the narrow dirt path towards the water. Everything looked the same and yet it was different. The colors seemed more vibrant. There was a different quality to the air and the water, a sense of anticipation, as if this place had been waiting for Tony and Julia’s return.
What strange notions she was having today. She’d been feeling so sentimental these past few days. Perhaps it was nothing more than simply being away from work, venturing outside her normal, defined schedule and the focus on clients and responsibilities.
They walked out to the end of the weathered, wooden pier and set the supplies down. Tony turned back to shore.
“I can help you find some sticks,” she offered.
His gaze flickered to her blouse. “It’s a little muddy.”
“That’s okay.”
They headed in different directions once they stepped onto the marshy ground. She found a long, skinny branch among the low-lying greenery and snapped it in half across her knee. She swiped her hands on her khakis, leaving smudges. She didn’t care.
Tony was cutting twine into equal lengths when she returned to the pier. He handed her two lengths, and she tied one end to each of her sticks. He slit open the pack of chicken wings with his pocketknife. They baited their lines, set up the poles and dropped the lines into the water.
She flopped down on her stomach and stretched her arms towards the water so she could rinse off her hands. He lay down next to her and did the same. The water was cool and clear. She scanned the rocks and tree branches on the bottom, searching for movement in the shadows.
Tony scooted back onto his knees, grabbed the bucket and dunked it into the water. Then he poured it into the empty ice chest. He repeated the motion until the chest was half full.
“Feeling lucky?” she asked.
“Always.”
He sat on the edge of the pier and dangled his legs over the water.
She moved back a little, still on her stomach, and crossed her arms on the warm, sun-bleached wood. She rested her cheek on her arms, relishing the afternoon sunshine kissing her face, her arms, the backs of her legs. “This is my favorite time of year,” she confided softly. “There’s something about September that makes me happy and a little sad at the same time. For me, it’s more of a time for new beginnings and resolutions than January is. Maybe it goes back to that back-to-school feeling we had when we were kids, you know what I mean? We’re getting organized again, getting ready for the winter. And that’s the sad part, knowing there won’t be too many more days like this before the snow arrives.”
He smiled at her upturned face. “I know what you mean. I like this time of year, too. The humidity is gone. The summer crowd is gone. It’s quieter. More peaceful.”
“Do you come here often?”
“Yes.”
He didn’t expand on that.
There was a tug on one of the lines. Julia pushed herself to her knees and grabbed the net. “Can I do it this time?”
His brows lifted in pleased surprise. “You sure?”
“Yep. And I don’t want you waving the net in my face like last time.”
His teeth flashed in a grin. He tugged carefully on the line. They both watched the blue crab rise to the surface, clutching onto the chicken wing for dear lif
e. “Hold the net out,” Tony said.
She leaned forward with the net. He yanked the string up and over, gave it a shake. The crab wouldn’t let go. Tony pinched the back part of the top and bottom of its body and tugged the crab loose from its booty. It fell into the net. “Drop it into the ice chest.”
Another one of the lines began to shake. Working together, they hauled in four crabs in quick order. Tony watched them scrabbling along the bottom of the ice chest. “Not enough meat yet,” he observed. “Let’s try for a few more.”
They kicked off their shoes and sat side by side, eyes on the lines as they sipped at the bottled water Tony had bought. Julia tipped her face towards the sun. “This was my favorite memory of that day,” she said. “Just sitting. Enjoying a rare moment of peace with you.”
His brief laugh contained a hint of self-deprecation. “They were rare.”
She gave him a direct look. “It wasn’t easy being around you back then, you know. I always had to be so careful about what I said, the way I acted. After the accident, for a while, you were very sweet with me. I wasn’t trying to be your mother. I just wanted to be your friend.”
His mouth twisted in a regretful grimace. “I know. Things just got weird. I was twelve. Going through puberty. You were—are—a pretty girl.”
She felt her face color. “What? Are you… Are you saying you were attracted to me?”
He shook his head at her disbelief. “Come on, Julia. What do you think? You’re telling me you never noticed the way I was looking at you?”
Her brow knitted. “No. I only remember you avoiding me, pulling away from me. I just thought it was because of the mom thing.”
“No. I never thought of you as a mom or even as a sister. I was embarrassed about how I thought of you then. My body was changing. I was too ashamed to talk with Joe about it.” He tugged on his earlobe, looking a little abashed. “I got a hard-on practically every time you were close by. Even if you weren’t in the room at all, and I just got a scent of you. I couldn’t control my reaction. One night, I got up to get a glass of water and saw you and Joe making out on the living room couch. He had his hands under your shirt. That visual made things worse. Every time I jerked off, I was thinking of you, the way your face had looked when he touched you. And that made me angry because you were Julia, my childhood friend, my brother’s girlfriend. I shouldn’t have been thinking of you that way.” He shook his head. “It was all so confusing and complicated. I didn’t want you around, and I wanted to be near you at the same time. So I lashed out. I was able to control myself better as I grew older, but there were still times when I’d catch myself lusting after you. I think antagonizing you was a way of distancing myself from those feelings.”
