by Jenika Snow
* * * *
Brea set down the Buttery Nipple and Corona in front of Tristan and Kash. Tristan sat on Kash’s lap, his thick, tattooed arm slung over her shoulder. He murmured something into her ear which had her grinning and smacking his chest playfully. Ever since she met Tristan that first time, their relationship had grown slowly. Kash, another fighter, one that was known as the Champion amongst the underground, fought almost as much as Adrian did, and the two women had started seeing each other more frequently. That first time out with Tristan had started off uncomfortable, and even knowing that Tristan knew there was something up with her past didn’t deter Brea from wanting to spend time with her. It had been so long since she was able to have friends, really sincere ones that actually cared about her and her feelings. It was dangerous and Brea was being selfish, but she wanted the interaction that made her feel like a human being. Brea was still hesitant with new people, but she wouldn’t forget how Tristan had helped her escape when her fear had had a chokehold on her.
Tristan leaned forward, shouting over the drum of noise that surrounded them. “I know we don’t talk a lot, but I was wondering if you’d like to come to dinner at our place next weekend. It won’t be anything big, just a few of our friends. We’re celebrating Kash’s birthday.”
The thought of hanging out with other people, other people that would make her feel more human was tempting, but she couldn’t risk it, couldn’t bring any more people into her fucked-up life. She had already brought Adrian and now Tristan into it, and if anything ever happened to them it would be all her fault and she would never be able to forgive herself.
“That’s really nice of you to offer, but maybe another time.” A frown marred Tristan’s face and Brea didn’t stay around to answer the questions that were sure to come. She didn’t want to make any excuses, because they would all be a lie, and she didn’t want to lie to the person that had first helped her out when she had given up on humanity. She made her rounds and then headed back to the bar to get the drink orders filled. As she waited she looked over her shoulder at the cage, saw Adrian watching her and then wink before he exited and disappeared in the sea of bodies.
When she deposited her drinks and headed back to the bar, big arms wrapped around her and the spicy male scent of Adrian washed through her.
“You know, I couldn’t concentrate while I watched you bent over. All I could think about was lifting up your little skirt and pulling your panties aside.” The sound of his voice was like verbal sex. Pussy now wet and aching, Brea turned around in his arms and craned her neck to look at him. He was a big man, easily a foot taller than her miniscule five-foot-two-inch frame, but no matter how much he towered over her, he always made her feel safe. Never once did he use his height or muscle mass to intimidate her.
“Is that so? You shouldn’t let things distract you. Before you know it someone will get the upper hand.” She placed a hand on his belly, felt the muscles ripple beneath the thin cotton of his shirt, and melted against him. Everything was so very masculine about him. When he leaned down, his breath stirred the tendrils of hair that had fallen out of her messy bun. A shiver moved through her at the sound of his deep voice.
“I can’t think of a better distraction that would cost me a fight than you bent over a table with a tiny skirt on.” The feel of his moist tongue teasing the shell of her ear had her nipples tightening in response. It took all her willpower to place her other hand on his stomach and push him away.
“You’re going to get me fired if you keep this up.”
“Well, we wouldn’t want that.” He backed away, his hands raised in surrender, a lopsided grin on his face. “How about we pick this up later tonight at my place?”
Mouth gone dry, she pictured all of the things they would “pick back up.” All she could do was nod her response. His grin was sexy as sin and had her squeezing her thighs tighter. “You get off soon, right?” She nodded again. “Good.” He took a step toward her and placed his arms on the bar on either side of her. “Meet me at the main doors.” A soft, lingering kiss on her cheek was the only thing she got before he turned and was swallowed by the crowd.
Sagging against the bar, she licked her lips. God, she was getting in way over her head. When she turned back around, giving Travis, the bartender on duty, another drink order, all she could think about was Adrian, naked. It was enough to make a woman lose her sanity.
Someone bumped into her, jostling her into the top of the bar. The wood and metal dug into her belly and she gasped in pain. It wasn’t unusual for her to get a little battered while working in the underground. There were just too many people walking around, jostling each other for the chance to get closer to the cage. Everyone wanted to see the violence, smell the sweat and taste the blood. The next shove had someone’s hand brushing against the back of her thigh. A smile curved her lips as she pictured Adrian behind her again, touching her intimately, but that thought was instantly beaten down when the pain of fingers pulling at her flesh brought her back to reality. She could have dismissed it as someone accidentally touching her, but she knew that touch all too well. Cameron had gotten hard hurting her, and even though a pinch shouldn’t illicit so much pain, he knew just the right amount of pressure to torture her before the real agony began.
A gasp left her and she whirled around, fearing that Cameron would be standing right in front of her. But when she turned around he wasn’t there, just a group of nameless strangers, laughing and smiling because it wasn’t their life that they were trying to run from.
Searching the crowd proved that her imagination had a hold of her. Cameron wasn’t here. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. This wasn’t going to work. None of this was going to work. Being with Adrian was going to end up costing both of them their lives if she let it go any further. A half hour was left of her shift, and she knew she needed to stay away from him until that time. Once she was home she could really think about what she was going to do. If she saw him before her shift was up she wouldn’t be strong enough to stay away, at least not tonight. What she needed to do was get to the shooting range, fire off a few bullets and relieve some of her tension. The practice would also do her sanity some good. It was that or her nightmares were going to consume her whole.
Chapter Nineteen
The protective glasses that were required for all shooters to wear were securely on the bridge of Brea’s nose. The Colt .45 in her hand felt good. Damn good, and when she took her spot and lifted her arms, aiming the barrel at the black paper body, she pictured Cameron staring back at her. Anger was an emotion she was familiar with, harbored and stored away until she needed to channel it toward the one person that had ruined everything. She was sick of being a victim, sick of letting everything he had done ruin what she could have.
After her shift ended last night she had gotten out of there as fast as she could. She hadn’t been home more than five minutes and Adrian had tried to call her repeatedly. It was bad enough she had just ditched him, but having him call her solidified what a fucked-up person she really was.
At first she hadn’t answered, because honestly she didn’t know what to say to him. If he told her he was worried, that he was going to come over and make sure she was okay, she knew she couldn’t just blow him off. There had been plenty she had told Adrian, and she should be thankful he wanted to make sure she was okay. Wasn’t this what she wanted? To have someone who actually cared for her?
She had typed out a quick text, telling him she was sorry about running out but she wasn’t feeling well and had just wanted to go to sleep. At first she didn’t think he would reply since she hadn’t gotten a response right away, but then he had texted back, asking her to call him so he could hear her voice and know for sure she was okay. Of course she had called him because Adrian did care for her and the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him or make him worry needlessly. That little thought made her realize she was going to do just that eventually. She knew she wasn’t going to stay in this town,
with Adrian, yet she was allowing herself to grow attached to him. Was she leading him on? She didn’t think she was, but if she stepped back and really looked at what she was doing, that was what was going on. She was a shitty-ass person and she knew she had to put an end to it.
Her tips were adding up nicely, and with making double her wages working the underground, she was only a few days shy of having the amount she needed to leave. Finger curved around the trigger, she closed one eye and kept her arm steady. When she pulled the trigger that was the thought that played through her mind.
It was almost time to leave Adrian behind. It made her feel shitty, but it was for the best. At least that was what she kept telling herself as she continued to pull the trigger, over and over and over again. When her barrel was empty she brought her target forward, the paper sliding on the mechanical track. When it was right in front of her she set her pistol down and removed her glasses. Five bullet holes were centered in the chest and the sixth was right between the eyes. A satisfied grin had her lips curling up. This always made her feel better, even if everything else in her life was fucked up beyond repair.
Duffle bag slung over her shoulder, Brea made her way toward her car. Some of her tension was gone from shooting, but there was always that sliver that hung on, refusing to let go. Keys in hand because she never walked to her car without the teeth of each key between her fingers, she scanned the parking lot. Every move she made had her watching over her shoulder, making sure she wasn’t being watched, followed, or finding Cameron right behind her. The only time she didn’t feel like she had to always be on high alert was when she was with Adrian. She really needed to quit thinking those things because in the end she would be gone.
The parking lot was pretty much deserted given the fact it was early in the morning on a weekday, but she was always cautious. A black nondescript car was parked several spaces down from her and although it wasn’t something that should have set off warning bells, it did. The windows were tinted, even the windshield illegally so. The sound of the engine was rough, like a wild animal growling. She couldn’t see the driver, but she had the eerie feeling that whoever was behind that wheel was staring right at her.
She didn’t want to stare, but it was damn hard not to. When another car pulled into the spot right next to hers, a beast of a truck that blocked her view, she quickly unlocked her door and climbed in. She locked the doors and started her car, needing to go right away. It might be nothing and just her shot nerves, but she couldn’t take any chances. When she was onto the main road she glanced in her rearview mirror to see if she was being followed. A breath she hadn’t realized she had been holding left her when she realized the dark car was still parked in the lot. She had a lot of things to figure out, the main ones being if she was going to work the next couple of days and ensure she had enough to completely disappear, and how the hell she was going to say good-bye to Adrian. It was going to be hard, but she knew she had to do it today. Already he had called her three times, asking her to talk to him. It broke her heart, but she was doing this for him.
* * * *
Adrian nursed a beer and stared at the wall behind the bar that housed the bottles of liquor that would make sure everyone at tonight’s fight would be good and liquored up. Okay, he could handle her not wanting to see him last night, but when he tried to see her this afternoon she had made an excuse at every turn. Something wasn’t right, and although he knew this, he was torn between giving her the space she might really need, and going to her and demanding that she not shut him out. He wanted to tell her he was here to stay. There was no way she was going to just ignore what they shared. He knew damn well she felt the intense connection. It couldn’t just be one-sided. He took another long pull from his beer and dropped his head, tracing the worn lines on the top of the bar with his eyes and trying to figure out what he was going to do to convince her.
The feel of his phone vibrating in his pocket alerted him to an incoming call and he dug it out and looked at the screen. Brea’s number lit up the screen. “Thank fuck,” he muttered right before answered the call. “Brea. Damn, baby. I’m going crazy over here.” A beat of silence passed. “Brea? Are you okay, pretty girl?” She cleared her throat, and he knew that something was up.
“Can we talk?”
“Of course.” Anxiety grew inside of him and he felt every one of his systems reacting to the rush of adrenaline.
He heard the sound of a car door opening and shutting. “I’m actually headed into the club right now. Can you meet me here?”
“I’m already here.” He hadn’t realized his hand was clenched against his thigh. He straightened out his fingers and ran his hand over his hair. “I came here a little early to work out.” Because I have been going crazy without you and needed something to help me keep my mind from going crazy. “I can meet you at the main floor and we can go get coffee or something?”
“I don’t know, Adrian.” She sounded forlorn.
“We can go anywhere you want, Brea. Just please talk to me.” Her exhale let him know that maybe, just maybe there was hope. He wasn’t opposed to begging. “I just want to see you. I don’t know what’s going on, but I think I deserve the chance to plead my case.”
“Okay. I’ll meet you up here. We can go to the coffee shop down the street.”
They hung up and Adrian downed the rest of his beer and stood. Heart pounding at the mere thought of seeing Brea, he couldn’t help the smile that covered his face. It had only been a day that he hadn’t seen her, but here he was, like a lovesick teenager. Of course it was so much more than that. So much more.
“Well, hey there, baby. I’ve been missing you around the club. Where you been hiding?” The sickly sweet sound of Candy’s voice had him gritting his teeth in irritation. Since he had started seeing Brea he had managed to steer clear of this clinger, but here she was now, her perfume so strong and cloying it wrapped around him and threatened to choke the life out of him.
“I don’t have time for this, Candy.” She ran a finger up his arm and he shook her off.
“No?” Her once sweet and seductive voice turned hard and cold. “You don’t have time for me but you have time for that piece of pussy that works here?” Christ. He did not have time for this bullshit. She sidled up to him, her shirt once again a strip of latex and sequins. She lifted her hand, ran the bloodred tips along his chest, and then moved that last inch so her breasts were pressed against him. The fake globes felt like rocks compared to the soft, natural slope of Brea’s. Just having Candy touch him had his dick shriveling in his jeans. Gripping Candy’s upper arms, he meant to push her away, but she used it to advantage and quickly stood on her toes to kiss him.
What. The. Fuck. It took him a moment to react, but it was a moment too long.
“I can see we don’t need to have that conversation after all.” Brea’s voice sounded right behind Candy and he immediately tensed. “It looks like it just took one day for you to move on.”
He shoved Candy away and she giggled as she moved to the side. “Brea,” he said, but she lifted her hand to stop him. This looked bad, he looked bad, but what really split his heart in two was the devastated look on Brea’s face. Her eyes were puffy and red and he could tell that she had been crying.
“What’s wrong, pretty girl?” He took a step toward her and a strangled sound left her when she backed away.
“Don’t call me that.”
“Please, Brea.” He rubbed the center of his chest at the look she gave him. She feared him, hated him. “Please, baby, don’t look at me that way.” She might not fear that he would hurt her physically, but what she had just seen had hurt her emotionally. He had hurt her. He had been the one to put that fear in her eyes.
Chapter Twenty
This was exactly what Brea deserved. She should have just stayed upstairs and waited for Adrian, but she had been excited to see him, and that excitement had cost her. When she had come to the underground, knowing he worked out here in his free time, sh
e didn’t expect to see a woman wrapped around his body like they were fused together. It wasn’t just any woman, but the same one she had seen Adrian leave the bar with all those weeks ago. They had fucked, that much was clear on the woman’s face as she had pressed herself against him. She wore pretty much no clothing, but Brea supposed that was what men like Adrian liked.
She was a fucking fool for thinking Adrian felt anything for her. She was just a hole for him to pass the time. The tears were there, just waiting to fall, but she refused, fucking refused to give him the satisfaction of shedding them. She was so glad she hadn’t told him how she felt, told him that she did love him. It would have made this situation even worse.
“You know what, I’m glad we can just do this right here, right now.” There had been a small piece of her that knew that seeing Adrian might have changed her mind on breaking things off with him. She had decided that working those extra few days wasn’t worth it, not if Cameron had found her, and although he hadn’t made himself known, there were several factors that made her think he might be close. The biker asking her questions. The pain on the back of her thigh. The idling car that gave her an all-around bad vibe. All of those factors had alarms firing inside of her like crazy. It was better if she just left. Now.
“Listen, I just wanted to tell you that things aren’t working out, but I can see that you’ve moved on and my lack of presence won’t be a problem.”
“No, Brea, you have it all wrong.” She couldn’t let the strangled sound of his voice tell her any different. “Baby, please.”
Brea might have found him a little more convincing if his little girlfriend wasn’t still by his side, wearing a conniving smirk. She shook her head and took another step back. “Please,” she whispered, knowing if she didn’t leave now she would break down right in front of them. Wouldn’t that be the icing on this fucked-up piece of cake? She turned just as the tears started to fall. The sound of his calling after her, pleading with her to stay followed her all the way out to her car, but she knew they were just in her head. Adrian wasn’t coming after her and she tried to tell herself that was what she wanted. Of course it was a fucking lie.
