Growing Up Gronk: A Family’s Story of Raising Champions

by Gordon Gronkowski

  “She did an awesome job of managing us,” Rob said. “Without her contributions, we wouldn’t have had the great childhood that we did.”

  “I give her all the credit for that,” Gordy noted. “My role was to oversee them in sports.”

  All the brothers were coached by their father. The training was far more nurturing than has sometimes been portrayed in the media. One report implied that Gordy took his sons to the backyard when they were four years old and whipped tennis balls at their heads. In fact, he did lob tennis balls toward them, but it was to build hand-eye coordination, not as punishment.

  “When we were younger, my dad stressed that sports was all about having fun,” Dan said.

  Gordy coached travel baseball and youth hockey teams, largely so he could work with his sons, usually between the ages of eight and sixteen. As his business grew, he tried to coach less but found it difficult to step away.

  “As much as I wanted to get away from coaching, I never could,” Gordy lamented, although since his boys have grown, there is a feeling of nostalgia surrounding those years. “I didn’t always want to coach, but having boys forced me into it.”

  “He was so good at getting players on a team to become best friends,” Dan said. “It didn’t matter how big a dork the kid was or how popular or good an athlete he was. He got all the teammates to be best friends. You don’t see that too often. Most Little League teams just go out there. You’re buddies with some guys on the team, but not everyone gels. In the house teams, my dad’s plan was that everyone needed to get better. He’d start a kid for a couple innings, and if the kid was doing well, he’d keep pitching. If not, he’d put me in the lineup. The kids who played Little League with us will say their best year was when Mr. G was the coach. He made it fun for everybody.”

  Always the tireless worker, Gordy put in long hours studying coaching techniques and watching videos of other teams. He made up cards as a reward for players who achieved something special. Gordy knew the focus of the game should be about kids, not adults.

  “We were blessed to have good coaches and good people around who had the best interests at heart for the kids,” Dan recalled. “When parents at games are yelling at kids all the time, it becomes about them, and that takes away from the kids. The teams I played on, you didn’t see much of that.”

  Gordy knew that the young people he coached needed to feel a bond with one another. So, too, did their parents. Another key to his success was to get fellow parents involved.

  “We were a real team made up of good friends,” Dan recalled. “And he developed the kids. He wouldn’t just put the best player in to pitch the whole game. Kids that weren’t so good would play, so they got better. By the end of the season, all the kids who weren’t very good when they started became pretty decent. We’d go right to the playoffs. One year we won the championship eighteen to one because we were so far ahead of anyone else.”

  The picture wasn’t always rosy, but Gordy stressed that setbacks are a natural part of life.

  “All my kids griped and bitched at some point,” he said. “When Gordie was in a batting slump at college, I was afraid to take his call. He’d complain that he hated the game and that everything was BS. I always taught my kids that there are going to be bumps in the road. It’s never an easy path. But the one who comes out in the end is the one who knows how to handle the bumps. You just have to keep battling through.”

  A decade removed from having his father as a coach, Dan still speaks with pride about Gordy’s accomplishments. There remains something special about his youth and the time his dad spent nurturing him and his brothers and other kids in the community.

  “We won with every single team he coached in Little League. My dad had all these systems he used. In hockey, it was a different story. We’d always go to the championship but we’d never win.” Dan paused, then let out a deep laugh. “I think he knew more about baseball.”

  Chris as a high school baseball star, 2004.

  During his rookie season in 2010, Chris played fullback for the Dallas Cowboys.

  8

  Chris: Brains and a Pedigree

  “One day, when they were at college, Rob told me Chris actually studied that day. It lasted for ten minutes. But still, he always got straight As.”

  —GORDY GRONKOWSKI

  IN SPRING 2012, NEARLY seven years after graduating from high school, Chris Gronkowski realized a dream by attending an Ivy League college. As part of an NFL-sponsored program on business management and entrepreneurship, Chris was one of thirty pro football players to attend Harvard University for an intense one-week course.

  “It’s a business class for players,” he explained. “It teaches economics and helps guys make decisions about investments. You look at financial records of businesses and actual case studies. You ask yourself, is this a good investment? We dealt with real estate deals and how to handle negotiations.”

  Many NFL players invest in businesses, both during their careers and when their playing days end, so the league is trying to provide a foundation for them to make wise choices as they consider future careers and financial planning.

  The middle child, Chris is smaller than the other Gronkowski brothers. “Small” is a relative term. With a shock of blond hair above the center of his forehead, Chris stands at six feet two inches and weighs 245 pounds. His barrel chest and biceps strain the fabric of his shirts. Compared to most of society, he is a physical specimen. Next to his brothers, he gives up several inches in height, but his chest and muscles are just as wide.

  Chris has been dubbed the quiet son, the smartest in a clan of smart kids. Family friends describe him as the toughest brother. He was a high school athlete, playing football, hockey, and baseball. But he was also a high-honor-roll student who was accepted into the elite University of Pennsylvania to study business in 2005. It was only an eleventh-hour offer to attend the University of Maryland on a football scholarship that twisted his life in a different direction.

  “I was all set to go to [Penn’s] Wharton School,” Chris explained. “At the last minute, Maryland called and offered me a football scholarship. Some of the guys they originally offered scholarships to didn’t have high-enough grades. I was a little smaller than many college recruits, so I wasn’t getting many offers to play football.”

  Attending Maryland instead of the University of Pennsylvania was not a decision that kept Chris up at night. He immediately accepted the scholarship and the chance to play alongside his older brother Dan.

  “The Ivy League doesn’t offer scholarships, so I would have been on the hook for more than forty grand per year at Penn,” he said. “True, you’re going to have great opportunities after graduation, but that’s a lot of money to pay back.”

  Chris smiled as he told the story. There are benefits to being a smart guy.

  “My teachers always said that having good grades was your ticket to success, and they were right,” Chris admitted. “High grades were pretty much my ticket in. Plus, Dan was doing well at Maryland. He built a good reputation for our family.”

  Chris is the first to admit that those two things—brains and his family pedigree—have opened doors for him. On two separate occasions, college coaches figured that if one Gronkowski was good, another brother might be just as good. That logic paved the way to Chris’s NFL career as well.

  The third son, born at the end of 1986, Chris is two years younger than Dan and two years older than Rob. When he was a sophomore in high school, Dan was a senior, so they played varsity football together. Likewise, when Chris was a high school senior, Rob was a sophomore, so this time Chris was a teammate with his younger brother.

  “One of the big things for us was pride,” Chris explained. “When I played with Rob, I used to go all out so that when we got back to the huddle, I could say, ‘Hey, Bro, did you see what I just did?’ We would watch film together and I’d say, ‘Look at me here.’ We’d block together and take guys out and drill them. Part of the motivati
on was to impress your brother.”

  Mike Mammoliti, Williamsville North’s varsity football coach, oversaw development of the Gronkowski brothers. Chris played fullback on offense and linebacker on defense.

  “Chris was a little quieter early on. It was tough to get him to say a whole lot. He and another guy were the best players on our [junior varsity] squad. About six games into the season, they were so dominant on JV and we needed their help. We brought them both up with a couple games left in their freshman year. Then Chris started the next three years for us.”

  Despite his reserved manner, Chris was a versatile athlete who performed well on the field, according to the coach.

  “Every once in a while he’d say something funny that caught you off-guard. He always came into my office after phys ed class and ate my food. As he got older, he became more vocal and wasn’t as introverted. He blossomed into the person he became. He has a great sense of humor.”

  Gordy agreed that Chris was the quiet brother. Although all his boys are smart, Chris’s brains set him apart.

  “When it comes to academics, he’s like an Einstein,” Gordy said. “He doesn’t put much effort into it. He’s scary smart. I coached him in hockey when he was a kid, and he’d drive me nuts because he couldn’t look me in the eyes. I’d be talking and he’d skate around looking all over. One day I got pissed and yelled at him.”

  “I heard you,” Chris replied and repeated his father’s instructions verbatim.

  “It was scary and freaky,” Gordy admitted. “He had straight As all through high school. Academics always came easy to him. But he’s got a mean streak. He and Robbie used to beat the hell out of one another. If he gets mad, watch out.”

  At the University of Maryland, Chris redshirted his first year, then played the following two seasons. Another fullback, younger than Chris, received most of the reps with the first-team offense. Chris recognized this trend was going to continue, believing it was unlikely he would take the field. He began to consider another college.

  By this time, Rob was one of the top recruits in the nation. Rob committed to attend the University of Arizona, and Chris saw an opportunity.

  “The way it was going at Maryland, coaches were willing to do anything to put the other fullback in,” Chris said. “Rob was such a big name that wherever he went, they were able to bring me in and give me a chance.”

  Coincidentally, Arizona had shown interest in Chris when he was a high school senior. He had talked with both the football and baseball teams about playing there. Rob had accompanied his older brother during a campus visit, which is how he became interested in the college. As a high school senior on campus, Chris viewed his game films with head football coach Mike Stoops.

  “Coach Stoops told my dad I didn’t have the speed or talent to play for them,” Chris said with a laugh. Three years later, with Rob committed to Arizona, it was a different story.

  As a transfer student, NCAA rules forced Chris to sit out one season of football when he moved to Arizona. But Chris wanted to stay active, so he tried out for the baseball team. He had not played organized baseball since his senior year of high school. The layoff didn’t matter—Chris’s talent was obvious.

  “Chris was the best baseball hitter I’ve ever seen, period,” said John Ticco, a family friend who played high school ball with both Rob and Chris and later played college baseball at Miami University in Ohio. “I’ve seen a ton of players, but he’s the best pure hitter I’ve seen. He could have gotten drafted out of high school, but he committed to football instead.”

  Harry Shaughnessy, a former professional player and longtime Western New York baseball coach, agreed. Shaughnessy coached all the brothers from the time they were in Little League and as they progressed through high school. He is close enough to the Gronkowski family that the boys jokingly refer to him as Uncle Harry.

  “I’ve been around baseball my whole life,” Shaughnessy said. “I stand by the statement that Chris is one of the best hitters I’ve ever seen. He could turn his wrists and cut on a fastball like nobody else. It was to the point where I was worried when my own son played third base when Chris was batting. I knew he loved football, but I told Gordy not to let the kid give up on baseball. I was convinced he could have a major-league career as a designated hitter.”

  Ticco admires and remains envious of Chris’s natural talent.

  “I worked my tail off all winter to come into baseball season and get my swing right,” he recalled. “Chris played football and didn’t do any baseball training in the winter. He just did his normal workouts. In the spring, he’d come to the first practice and pick up a bat.”

  “This is the first time I’ve held one of these since last year,” Chris would say, taking a few practice swings at the air.

  “When the pitch came, he’d kill it,” Ticco said. “He’d blast it. It was crazy. To show how good he is, at Arizona he walked onto the number-one-ranked baseball team in the country.”

  Chris is humble when explaining the months he spent playing college baseball. The way he tells it, the requirements of two sports overwhelmed him.

  “I was getting back into baseball,” he said. “I had taken two years off, but came back, worked hard, and was killing it at first. But then I started doing football workouts and went to baseball workouts after that. This was every day. I was shot from the workouts. I was shedding weight. I lost twenty pounds and had no power anymore. I went from crushing it to struggling in both sports. It became a mess.”

  Chris finally approached the baseball coach, Andy Lopez, and initiated a candid discussion about his future. He thought it would be best to give up baseball and put his efforts exclusively into football.

  “I told the coach that I’m on a scholarship for football, and he understood,” Chris said. “I was glad to focus on just one sport.”

  Despite the shift, there was no guarantee that football would pan out.

  “Coming to Arizona was a bit of a risk, because they hardly ever used a fullback,” Chris said. “I thought I might get ten snaps a game if I got the starting job. I tried playing linebacker for a while, and that was fun because I got to go against Rob in practice.”

  The sibling rivalry was strong, but the boyhood days of Chris beating up Rob were over. In fact, the two lived together at Arizona, getting along like best friends.

  “One day, when they were at college, Rob told me Chris actually studied that day,” their father said, shaking his head. “It lasted for ten minutes. But still, he always got straight As. It was so funny because growing up, Rob and Chris couldn’t stand each other, but then Chris went to Arizona to be with him and they ended up rooming together. Go figure.”

  Bragging rights were still part of the brotherhood, however.

  “I played on the scout team when I first started at Arizona,” Chris explained. “I was a linebacker during practice and I was all hyped up. Rob was running an out route and I was covering him. When he juked in, he was off-balance, so I threw him on the ground. He’s lying there, and I’m slapping everyone up, bragging about my hit.”

  The receivers’ coach, however, was not amused that his star tight end had been mistreated. He stormed onto the field, cursing Chris.

  “You don’t touch him like that!” the coach shouted. “Who do you think you are? You won’t be on this team anymore if you do that again! You’re a goddamn nobody!”

  “What are you talking about?” Chris asked. “I’m his brother.”

  Suddenly, silence reigned.

  “That coach didn’t know what to do afterward,” Chris recalled, laughing. “He had no clue what to say. He thought I was just some walk-on. It was awesome.”

  It didn’t take Chris long to work his way into the lineup. He gave up defensive duties and focused on playing fullback. In his first game, he scored a touchdown. That and his impressive blocking opened the coaches’ eyes to his potential. Suddenly, Chris’s number was being called more often.

  “I felt I was a better off
ensive player anyway,” he said, explaining the position switch. “Once I got on the field, it started blowing up. I went from playing ten snaps a game to playing a majority of snaps by the end of the year. They brought Rob and me in at the same time. Mostly I was a fullback, but there were times I’d line up next to him as a wing, and we’d block the same guy. Or I would line up as a second tight end, and we would each run a streak down the middle to split the defense. The safety in the center had to choose which of us to cover.”

  Being the star, coverage often diverted to Rob. That opened opportunities for Chris. In his junior year, Chris caught eight balls for 198 yards.

  “Every time I caught the ball, it was for a big gain,” he said. “I caught a touchdown in a bowl game on national TV against BYU [Brigham Young University]. That touchdown put the game away. It was nice because it put me on some highlight shows and then everything opened up for me.”

  Despite their battles throughout childhood, Rob understood how tough his brother was.

  “When I watched him on the field in high school and college, he inspired me to get my blocks down,” Rob said. “He brought toughness to the table. Playing college football with him was an honor. We definitely helped each other out. It was great that every time he caught a pass, it was for a huge gain.”

  Around this time, Chris watched his older brother Dan get drafted by the Detroit Lions. He wondered if he could follow in those footsteps.

  “During my junior year, I thought I might have a shot at the pros,” he said. “Rob and I were watching game film, and he said, ‘Those are some NFL blocks right there.’ That’s probably the first time I thought seriously about the NFL. I had to get over the fact that when you’re growing up, people tell you the odds against making it. There are so many guys who are good players but don’t get a shot. Once Dan did it, I knew I had a chance as well.”